I unintentionally hurt Shannon Lynch.
Again.
I knocked her on her ass at school.
Again.
And then she went and almost gave me a bleeding-heart attack.
Honest to god, I never felt fear like I had when I saw her collapse on the floor next to her locker.
I knew it was a stupid idea to follow her back into school, but I needed to check on her.
To be honest, I was afraid of Bella intercepting her.
Finding her on the floor like that was beyond terrifying.
My heart literally seized in my chest when I saw her and only kick started back up when I got to her and realized that she was okay.
She was mortified, but she was okay.
I didn’t care about puke.
Everyone puked.
Even girls.
Apparently, this girl d
I remembered exactly what was written in the file.
She threw up a lot.
That worried me.
More than it should.
What worried me further was why this happened.
Shannon was clearly an anxiety puker.
It was as good as written in her school file.
For Christ’s sakes, she brought a toothbrush to school with her.
I was burning with my own form of anxiety from the need to know what had upset her.
I didn’t want to push my luck though, or make the situation worse, so I kept my mouth shut.
Putting her in my car probably wasn’t my best idea, given the fact that she didn’t seem to want to speak to me ever again, but I wasn’t leaving her here to take a shitty bus.
She didn’t speak a single word to me the entire drive to her house – with the exception of apologizing a million fucking times for something she obviously couldn’t control.
I didn’t know what to do or say to put her at ease.
I kept telling her it was okay, but she wasn’t hearing me.
It was like she was stuck in her own head, worrying herself to death over something I couldn’t see
I felt helpless.
I wanted to help her, but it was an impossible thing to do when I couldn’t see who she was up against.
“I’m sorry,” Shannon told me when I pulled up outside her house, after spending a solid five minutes trying to coax her into telling me which one hers was. “I really am so –”
“You have nothing to apologize for,” I told her before cutting the engine and turning to look at her.
Jesus Christ, what was wrong?
Had someone given her shit at school?
Was someone giving her hassle again?
She looked terrified.
“Johnny, I, uh…” her words trailed off as she flicked her gaze towards the small, terraced house at the end of the street and then back to me. “Please don’t tell,” she finally said, voice small, eyes wide and full of unshed tears.
I frowned, feeling my heart race. “Tell what, Shannon?”
She tucked her hair behind her ears and exhaled a shaky breath. “What I did at school.”
My hands twitched on the wheel as I fought the urge to pull her onto my lap and hug her.
“I’m not going to tell anyone anything,” I said in as gentle a tone as I could muster.
“You promise?” she croaked out.
I nodded. “I promise.”
Shannon exhaled another ragged breath. “I’m sorry…it just…it happens when I get scared.”
My blood ran cold.
“What are you scared of, Shannon?” I surprised myself by how calm I sounded when I was two seconds away from losing my shit right here in this car. “Did something happen?”
“Happen?” she whispered, biting on her bottom lip.
“At school?” I nodded slowly. “Was someone giving you hassle?”
She closed her eyes and bit down even harder on her lip, so hard that I reached over and pulled it free from her teeth.
“Don’t,” I coaxed.
Her eyes popped open. “Huh?”
“You’ll hurt yourself,” I told her, retracting my hand even though it was the last thing I wanted to do.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
“You don’t need to be sorry,” I replied in a thick tone.
Shannon dropped her gaze to stare at her clasped hands and after an achingly long pause of silence, she nodded to herself.
“I better go inside now,” she finally said, voice small. “Thanks for the spin.”
I watched as she unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the door and panic flared to life inside of my stomach, which made no sense because I didn’t know what the fuck I was worrying about.
“You’d tell me, right?” I called after her when she was out of my car. “If something was happening to you?” I leaned over the passenger seat to look at her, knowing I was making a hash of this, but needing to say it anyway. “You’d tell me if someone was giving you trouble at school?”
Shannon stood with her hand gripping my car door for the longest moment, big blue eyes locked on mine.
Finally, she nodded.
I felt my body sag in relief.
“Bye, Johnny,” she whispered and then she closed the door.
“Bye, Shannon,” I muttered to myself as I turned the key in the engine.
I needed to get out of here before I did something really stupid, like put her back in my car and take her home with me.
Because a fucked-up glitch in my brain told me to do just that.
Leaving her felt all wrong.
Drive away, Johnny.
Turn the car around and leave.
She’s fine.
She’s perfectly fine.
Concentrate on the game, Kav.
You have training.
You not need to be losing your head over a girl.
Shaking my head, I switched the car into gear and forced myself to get a bleeding grip of myself and just drive.
It didn’t work.
Because I couldn’t go.
Throwing the car into neutral, I shoved open my car door and climbed out. “Wait!”
Shannon spun around and stared at me with wide eyes. “Huh?”
What are you doing, Kav?
What the fuck are you doing?
“Come with me.” The words were out of my mouth before I had a chance to stop myself or take them back.
“Come where with you?” Shannon whispered, gaze flicking from me to the house down the street.
I don’t know, Shannon.
I don’t fucking know.
I have no bleeding clue what’s happening to me.
I just know that my gut is telling me not to leave you right now.
“Anywhere?” I offered, and then cleared my throat before adding, “We could go for drive? Or get something to eat?”
Jesus, what was wrong with me?
I saw something flash across her eyes then, something that looked an awful lot like relief.
“You want me to?” Shannon asked in a small voice. “Come with you?”
I nodded uncertainly. “Yeah, Shannon.” My voice was thick. “I want you to come with me.”
