Mason was quiet in the car, and when Katrina cast a surreptitious glance at his profile, it was obvious to her that he seemed troubled. His dark brows were furrowed into a frown, his jaw was clenched, and the thin line of his lips indicated that he was mulling over what had just happened back at Inked with Connor.
While she was relieved that she’d been able to face down those past demons once and for all, she couldn’t deny that her nerves had kicked in again for a whole different reason. For the past three days, she’d pushed Mason away when he should have been the person she’d turned to. Between making him feel insignificant, then him being blindsided by all of Connor’s lies, she honestly had no idea where they stood as a couple.
When he drove to her apartment, her heart filled with dread. Mason never bought her to her place if they were together, and she desperately tried not to read too deeply into the action.
He remained silent as he walked her to her door, then followed her inside. She set her purse on the small table in the entryway, headed into the living room, and sat down on the couch. Instead of joining her on the sofa, he paced restlessly back and forth in front of her, obviously too on edge to sit still.
He exhaled a deep breath and finally met her gaze, his blue eyes filled with a torment she didn’t fully understand. “Is what Connor said true?” he asked, his voice raspy. “Back in high school, did he . . . ”
He was waiting for her to finish the sentence, as if he knew that what had happened between her and Connor hadn’t been consensual. “He raped me.” There was no sugarcoating the truth.
He visibly shuddered and swore beneath his breath, his agony even more pronounced now. “Jesus, Katrina.” He stared at her, his face etched with so much pain. “When?”
“Do you remember that huge party at Rick Ackerman’s house when his parents were gone for the weekend? It was a few weeks before graduation, and you, me, and Connor went together.” When he nodded, she folded her hands in her lap and went on, feeling calmer inside than she’d expected. “After you went off with Jessica later that night, Connor started making lewd advances and touching me inappropriately. He was drunk and obnoxious and I just wanted to get away from him. The downstairs bathroom was being used, so I went upstairs, and I didn’t even know that he’d followed me until he pushed me into one of the empty bedrooms and locked us in. He was so much stronger than I was, and I just couldn’t stop him no matter what I tried to do.” She stopped there, knowing that Mason didn’t need details.
“I’m so sorry.” He dragged his hand down his face, his remorse a tangible thing. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
She shook her head in confusion. “You have nothing to be sorry for, Mason. It wasn’t your fault.”
He didn’t seem convinced. “I swore after what those bullies at the park did to you the day we met, and after learning about your stepfather’s abuse, that I’d always protect you and keep you safe. And Jesus, I completely failed you when you needed me the most.”
Mason’s words shocked her. She’d been so worried that he’d look at her differently after discovering the truth. That it would change the dynamic of their relationship. Never would she have thought that he’d blame himself for something he hadn’t had any control over.
She stood up and walked over to him, needing him to realize that he wasn’t responsible for the actions of another man. “You didn’t fail me,” she said, looking directly into his dark blue eyes and hating the self-recrimination she saw there. “You didn’t know what would happen that night, and there isn’t anything you could have done to change the outcome. You need to believe that.”
He let out a laugh that lacked any humor. “If I hadn’t let my goddamn dick rule my brain back then, I would have been around you that night, and Connor never would have touched you.” He cupped her face in his big hands, his touch so gentle and caring as he stared into her eyes. “You carried this around for eight years. Why didn’t you tell me that night? The first thing you should have done was come and find me.”
She managed a wry smile. “I think you were busy with Jessica,” she said, trying to lighten things, because the truth was much harder to admit.
“I don’t give a shit,” he said vehemently. “You are the single most important thing in my life, Katrina. There never has been, and never will be, another woman who will ever matter more to me than you do. Ever. Why would you doubt that I wouldn’t be there for you? That I’d do everything in my power to make sure that something like that would never happen again?”
“Once it was over, there wasn’t anything you could have done to change that fact.” Knowing the rest of her explanation was more difficult for her to say, she tried to turn her head to the side so she didn’t have to look directly into his eyes, but he wouldn’t allow her to retreat from him in any way. “After Conner assaulted me, I was ashamed and humiliated and I felt so . . . dirty. And he told me that if I said anything to you, he’d just say that I came on to him, that I wanted it, just like he did today.”
“And you honestly thought I’d believe him?” Mason asked incredulously.
She didn’t miss the hurt in his tone. “I was only seventeen at the time, and I kept thinking about what had happened with Owen, and how my mom didn’t believe me when I told her that he was touching me inappropriately. And how Owen turned everything around and blamed me for being a slut, and that my mother chose to side with a man she barely knew, over her own daughter.”
His gaze softened in understanding as his thumbs tenderly glided along her cheeks. “I get it.”
But there was more she needed to tell him. “I was also afraid that after Connor’s attack, if you knew what happened, that you’d look at me differently. That you’d treat me differently. And I never wanted it to change our friendship.”
“Oh, Kitty-Kat,” he said softly as he drew her into his arms and hugged her tight. “I had an uneasy feeling about Connor after a conversation we had at Kincaid’s the other night, and I should have listened to my gut then and told him to fuck off.”
Katrina burrowed closer against Mason’s warm, strong body and laid her head on his chest. “No more regrets or blame, okay, Mason? I don’t want to live in the past anymore.”
“Okay,” he agreed as he wrapped one arm around her waist and slid the fingers of his other hand into her hair and gently massaged her scalp. “As long as you promise that you won’t ever keep secrets like this from me again.”
She closed her eyes and breathed in the warm, masculine scent of him. “I promise.”
“There’s one more thing I need you to be honest about,” he said after a long moment had passed. “The scars on your hip . . . you said it was a relapse. Did it happen after that night with Connor?”
She swallowed hard. No more secrets; she’d promised him. “Yes.”
He swore succinctly, and when he squeezed those muscular arms tighter around her, she knew that he was internalizing her response.
“No more regrets or blame,” she reminded him. “It’s done and in the past. The only things I want to think about are the future and us.” Hopefully, you still want that, too.
“About the future and us . . . ” He gently eased her away so that he was looking down at her face, his eyes suddenly very serious. “We need to talk about that.”
She had no idea where this conversation was headed, or where it would end. Her biggest fear was that her behavior over the past three days had pushed him too far away and changed everything between them, or he’d come to the conclusion that he didn’t want to be tied down to one woman. She’d always known that was a possibility.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about us,” he started out tentatively, which only increased her sudden bout of nerves. “You know my past. You know I grew up without real parents and had a mother who was an addict and prostitute, then went to prison and left all three of us boys with an abusive prick. And even though Clay raised me and put up with all my crap, I always felt unworthy of being loved. I thought I wasn’t good enough for anyone to love. It was easier to push people away than let them close and risk any kind of rejection. And because of that, I just fell into an easy, no-commitment pattern with women because it was safe and uncomplicated.”
He paused for a moment, and Katrina waited patiently, knowing that whatever he had to say was difficult for him, because he wasn’t the type of guy to talk about emotional stuff.
Exhaling a deep breath, he slid his hands down her arms until he was holding her hands. “But from the very beginning, you were different, and you were the first girl I ever shared anything with. You knew my past. You knew my secrets. No matter what I did, and I certainly wasn’t a choirboy as a teenager or as an adult, you never judged me. You never left me, even though there were times that I knew I did some stupid shit that should have had you questioning why you were friends with me. You were always there.”
She swallowed the knot of uncertainty in her throat and forced a smile. “That’s what best friends are for, right?”
“You will always be my best friend, Kitty-Kat,” he said with a gentle smile she couldn’t completely read. “And I’ve always loved you, which is why it was so easy to fall in love with you over these past few weeks together. And this weekend, when you started to pull away and withdraw, it scared the shit out of me. The thought of losing you, in any way, changed everything for me and put things into perspective, too.”
Her mind was still stuck on the it was so easy to fall in love with you part of his statement, but soon caught up with the rest. “How so?” she asked, her voice a whisper of hope as her heart fluttered in her chest.
“I want you in my life forever,” he said, without an ounce of doubt in his deep, masculine voice. “Every morning and every night. As my best friend. As my perfect lover. As my beautiful wife.”
Certain she’d misheard that last part, her eyes grew round with disbelief. “Your . . . your wife?”
“I’m so in love with you, Katrina, and if I marry you, that makes you mine forever.” Then, a boyish smile curved the corner of his mouth, and his eyes glimmered playfully. “Umm, that is, if you want to be mine forever. I guess I shouldn’t assume anything.”
She bit her lip as tears of happiness filled her eyes. “Yes, I want to be yours forever. I love you, Mason Kincaid. I’ve loved you since the day you rescued me from those bullies. I was just waiting and hoping that someday you’d feel the same way.”
“I’m such an idiot. It took me long enough,” he said, and finally kissed her, slow, hot, and deep.
The hunger and desire didn’t take long to become a raging need that neither one of them could deny. He skimmed his hands down her back and over her bottom, then gripped her thighs and guided her legs around his waist. Once she had her ankles locked tight at the base of his spine, he walked to her bedroom, and didn’t break the kiss until they were next to her bed and her heels were steady on the floor again.
When he finally lifted his mouth from hers, he grinned down at her. “Best thing I ever did was carry you out of Coyote Ugly that night and get into your pants. You were so fucking sexy and hot that my dick decided right then and there that you were the only woman he would ever get hard for, which is more than fine by me.”
She laughed happily as she pushed up his T-shirt and pulled it over his head and off. “I’ll keep him very happy, I promise.”
When she reached for the button on his jeans, he caught her wrists and stopped her, his intense gaze going serious once again. “So, back to that forever thing we just talked about?”
She tipped her head to the side. “Yes?”
“That’s where I was this morning,” he said, and now he looked adorably nervous. “I met up with Samantha so she could help me take care of the forever part of our relationship.”
Katrina couldn’t be more confused. “I’m not sure what that means.”
Releasing her hands, he pushed his fingers into the front pocket of his jeans. He pulled out a condom and grinned sheepishly at her. “Umm, wrong pocket, but yeah, I was hopeful that I’d get lucky today.” He tossed the foil packet onto the bed, then reached into the other side and this time withdrew a small black velvet box.
Everything inside of Katrina went still, and she could barely breathe as he opened the lid and revealed a stunning ring that was set with a continuous line of round, brilliant diamonds. She was shocked and speechless.
He removed the sparkling band, picked up her left hand, and put it on her ring finger. “I needed Samantha’s help to pick out the perfect ring for you. It’s called an eternity band, and that’s how long I’m going to love you. For an eternity.”
So much emotion tightened her throat, and her heart filled with joy as she looked from the ring circling her finger back to Mason. “That’s a really long time.”
“I know. I’m in it for the long haul.” Smiling warmly at her, he gently brushed his fingers along her cheek, then walked behind her to unzip her dress. “One more thing before I lay you back on that bed and make you mine. Do you know why I brought you here to your apartment instead of my house?”
She shook her head, remembering her earlier thoughts when they’d arrived here. “No. Why?”
Done opening her dress, he pushed the sleeves down her arms, and the outfit slid down her body and fell to the floor at her feet. He placed a warm, damp kiss on her bare shoulder as he unfastened her strapless bra and let that drop to the ground, too. Cool air touched her breasts and her nipples tightened into hard, aching points.
“Because after I get my fill of you, which might take a long while, we are packing up all your stuff and taking it to my place,” he said as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of her panties and eased them down her thighs until they joined the rest of her clothing. “You’re not staying in this apartment ever again. After today, you will be in my bed every single night. Do you understand?”
The slightest bit of authority in his voice made her shift anxiously on her heels, and she moaned when he followed up that statement with a light, playful smack to her ass. “Yes, I understand,” she said, wanting the same thing.
“Good. Now take off your shoes and get up on the bed,” he ordered, knowing how much it turned her on when he got bossy. “I want to fuck you wearing nothing but that ring on your finger.”
She did as he asked, and by the time she was settled, he’d stripped off the rest of his clothes and was as naked as she was. He was so gorgeous, from his masculine features to those tattoos she loved, to his toned chest, lean abs, and that thick, hard cock between his legs. And he was all hers, she thought giddily.
He sheathed his erect shaft and climbed up on the bed between her spread legs, and starting at her knee, he slowly, lazily kissed his way up her thighs, until they quivered with anticipation and she was panting with need. His wicked mouth and tongue lingered at her core, licking and sliding through her sensitive folds of flesh. Over. And over. And over.
When she was beyond wet and aroused, he moved on, detouring to the scars on her hip. He kissed each one lovingly, replacing the reasons they were there with the pleasure of his touch. He teased her nipples next, sliding his tongue over them, nipping at them with his teeth, then sucking those engorged tips deep into his mouth until she was desperate for the orgasm he’d so reverently built to a peak but withheld just out of her reach. When she couldn’t stand the sensual torment any longer, she finally reached down, twisted her fingers in his hair, and brought his lips up to hers.
The kiss was as hot and deep as the single thrust of his shaft driving into her. She gasped and undulated her hips, causing him to groan, low and harsh. He lifted his head and stared down at her, the emotion in his gaze filling her heart to overflowing for this man. Her best friend. Her lover. And soon, her husband.
“You’re mine, Kitty-Kat,” he said possessively as he threaded their fingers together and pinned her hands above her head before he started to move, claiming her in the most intimate way possible. “Forever.”
“Yes,” she whispered back, knowing she’d never get tired of hearing that. “Yours. Forever.”
Everything about being with Mason felt incredible. His powerful body. The sensual passion between them. The need. And the love.
Especially that. And it was all hers, for an eternity.
* * *
“Just a little bit longer and I’ll be done,” Mason said. “You doing okay?”
Katrina lay on her side on the padded table in Mason’s station at Inked while he finished up her newest tattoo. It was after hours, and they were alone in the shop, and while the pain was noticeable considering how large the design was, she was handling the process pretty well. Meditating had definitely helped to take the edge off the worst part of the discomfort.
“I’m good,” she said, anxious to see the finished piece, which she’d created herself. And this time, it was fitting that Mason was the one to cover the scars on her hip. He was the one who’d helped her recover emotionally, and this was her way of moving on from all the pain lingering in her past. Now when she looked in the mirror, instead of those hideous cuts and slices that were a part of a life she no longer lived, she’d now see a beautiful cluster of butterflies, to match the ones on her arm.
The past few months living with Mason had been amazing. She’d never been so happy, so content or at peace with herself. She knew Mason felt the same with his own emotions and with her. They were two damaged people who’d managed to heal each other with something as simple as unconditional love. The fact that they were best friends who had phenomenal sex was a bonus.
She moved the hand on the table, and the lights glinted off her eternity band, making her smile when she remembered the day he’d put it on her finger. They’d talked about marriage, and she was more than ready to take that next step with Mason. He’d assured her that he was ready to make that final commitment, as well, and told her to make whatever plans she wanted, and he’d show up wherever and whenever she told him to. Typical man, she thought.
But he was her man, and after fourteen years of unrequited love, it felt damn good to be the only woman he wanted. The only woman he’d ever loved.
She felt him wipe away the last of the ink and watched as he put his tattoo machine down. “Ready to see what it looks like?” he asked.
She nodded, and he helped her down from the table. They walked over to the full-length mirror, and she looked at the reflection of her design that Mason had brought to life. The colorful butterflies were stunning. What was once so ugly and made her feel shame and humiliation was now pretty and captivating and made her feel beautiful.
Overwhelming emotion crowded in her throat and happy tears filled her eyes. “It’s gorgeous,” she whispered in awe as she met Mason’s warm gaze. “You did an amazing job. I can’t even see where the scars are anymore. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome and it was my absolute pleasure to lay that ink on your skin.” He curled his fingers around the back of her head and pulled her to him so he could drop a sweet kiss on her temple. “However, I have to confess that I took some creative liberty with the design.”
“You did?” She glanced back into the mirror, scrutinizing the butterflies a bit longer and harder this time, but couldn’t find anything that stood out. “What did you do?”
“It’s right here,” he said, and pointed to one of the butterflies’ wings, his expression a bit smug. “I made the veins into a word that I think you’ll like.”
She looked closer, and then she saw it, the word mine integrated into the lines crisscrossing one of the wings. His modification wasn’t obvious unless you were specifically looking for it, and it blended in naturally. But she loved that it was there, and that just the two of them were privy to the secret.
She grinned at him. “Possessive much?” she teased.
“With you? Always.” He wrapped an arm around her waist and brought her body flush to his as his hand grabbed her ass. “Though I don’t expect anyone to get up close and personal with that tattoo except for me, considering where it’s placed.”
He moved his hips against hers, and Katrina’s eyes widened in shock. “Oh, my God!” she said as she felt his erection grind against her lower belly. “Are you seriously hard?”
“I can’t help it,” he said with an unrepentant laugh that held sinful undertones. “Seeing my ink on you is such a fucking turn-on. Kinda brings out the inner caveman in me and makes me want to conquer and claim.”
“Well, who am I to interfere with your need to play the Neanderthal?” she said as she rose up on her toes and kissed his lips. After all, she was his, in ink and in truth. Forever.
