Being on the whale-watching excursion was nothing short of exhilarating. However, I was still shocked that Cameron, adrenaline junkie that he was, didn’t come along. Something was up with the helicopter, so he stayed on the yacht with Jim, who needed to handle some business for his London office.
Nevertheless, both men certainly missed out on quite the experience. We took a boat that had been lowered from the side of Jake’s superyacht, which seemed the size of a regular goddamn yacht. Such was the life for billionaires, I guess.
Speaking of enjoyable, private, billionaire-chartered whale-watching tours, Jake had brought along a couple of Marine Biology students from the local university. The boy and girl were in their senior year at California State University, Monterey Bay, and they were the politest and coolest young adults you could ask for. They certainly made an impression on all of us.
They guided the driver of Jake’s mini yacht to where the whales usually played and fed in the bay. At first, it was rather dull, but the excitement came the closer we got to spot the whales. The students pointed to where the seagulls swarmed over the white caps of the ocean, stating we might see a fin or a tail.
There were about a hundred false alarms and non-stop laughter before Jake’s son, John, spotted our first whale. Then it got crazy fun. We were all acting like silly kids—Jake and Collin more so than the rest of us—running from port to starboard, looking for the next whale.
Suddenly, a huge whale was heading straight for us.
“Holy fuck!” Jake said, covering his son’s ears so he could nail the f-word with the sincerity he felt. “Jesus!”
My eyes must’ve been the size of silver dollars when the massive-ass whale started to get too damn close to the boat. The mini yacht felt the size of a canoe compared to the creature approaching where we floated helplessly.
“My God,” Ash said in awe.
The giant humpback whale was the most majestic creature I’d ever seen. I stood there, gaping in wonder, before I walked to the ledge, held onto the railing, and watched it glide through the water, dangerously close to us. It wouldn’t have taken much for the whale to breach the hull of this boat, but as I watched it move by, everything seemed so peaceful.
I smiled when I turned and looked at Jacks, standing next to Addy between Jake and Collin. Everyone was silenced by the magnificent creature swimming gracefully below our boat.
“That was the most insane feeling in the world,” Jacks said.
“No shit,” Collin said. “I swear, my balls are in my throat right now.”
“In your throat?” Jake laughed. “I’m not sure if I even have my balls anymore.”
Jacks laughed, and I just rolled my eyes.
“If you all look to the port side, you can see that the whales are starting to hunt for food,” the young man named Ryan said. “Over there.” He pointed to a sudden disturbance in the water. “They’re doing what we call bubble-net feeding.”
Sarah, his college companion, looked down at Addy, who was really trying to be her friend. “They’re blowing water below a school of fish right now,” she said. “It forces the fish up, and then the whales will swim up and catch the fish in their mouth.”
As soon as the guide said it, Addy and the kids squealed when the ocean opened, and the large whales’ mouths appeared and swallowed the fish.
Whales began shooting out of the water in the distance, and that’s when the curse words started flying—I even got a raised eyebrow and a laugh from Jacks when I said holy shit more times than I could count on one hand.
My heart was pounding with excitement as I watched this show. I could only compare it to watching the grand finale of a firework show that exceeded your expectations.
We’d watched the whales for a good two hours until the captain of the yacht notified the driver of our boat that bad weather was approaching, and the trip would need to be cut short.
Leaving was a bummer, but I couldn’t have been more grateful for the experience. I felt exhilarated by the majesty of nature, but I still felt the lingering sorrow from pushing Cameron away yesterday.
He’d gone on about how right things felt when we were together and about a feeling of missing family, and if I was honest, I was feeling that way right now without having him here. I wished I could see Cam next to Jacks, admiring the whales and having fun together. It was like a piece was missing from this enjoyment because he was gone.
I’d never been so goddamn fickle in all my life. Was fighting these feelings like swimming upstream, or was I doing the right thing by keeping Cam away? If it was right, why did it hurt so bad?
I tried to shake off my thoughts as we boarded the yacht again. I didn’t want to be in my head all day, and I didn’t want to be in another shitty mood like yesterday.
“They have lunch ready in the dining room. The kids opted to take theirs on the bottom deck,” Ash said. “Did you have a good time?”
“The best. That was better than I could’ve ever imagined. Thank you,” I said, knowing it was her and Jake’s yacht and the mini yacht that allowed us to have such a wonderful time today.
“Listen,” Avery said as we all walked through the luxurious boat toward the dining area, “the guys are heading back on the helicopter tomorrow, and Ash took the week off. Jake informed the captain that the yacht is ours for the week if you and Jacks want to take a fun little cruise down to Southern California with us.”
“Oh, wow. That sounds incredible,” I said, loving the idea of spending more time with my new friends. “Let me check with Cam, though. I think he has an appointment for Jacks to do some more scans on Thursday, but I’m not sure.”
We walked into the dining room to find an elegant spread of fruits, vegetables, roasted turkey, ham, and even a prime rib roast sitting in the center of a large, polished wooden table. It looked like a Medieval feast.
“Wow,” I said, sitting next to Cameron and smiling at him. “This is quite the spread.”
His mood hadn’t changed since this morning. I’d had the feeling earlier that the helicopter issue was an excuse for him to avoid whale watching, and now, I knew it was.
I kept replaying the sincerity in Cam’s sapphire blue eyes when he talked about us being a family and the look of devastation when I basically told him to fuck off. Of course, I’d treated him as if he were still the Cameron I remembered from high school, the man who could say one thing, then crush me while doing another immediately afterward. I didn’t want to take a chance and risk that kind of heartbreak again. The stakes were higher now.
But my mind wouldn’t let it go last night. I tossed and turned, thinking about how Cam helped Jacks through that seizure the way he did and how he talked to Jacks like a he was his son, not his patient.
I was aware that my cold exterior was unhealthy and that after all these years, my reaction was possibly unfair, but what difference did it make now that I’d iced him out? He was pissed, and I was confused.
“Tomorrow, I’m flying the guys back to Southern California because they’ve got to work. Jake has left the captain orders to bring the yacht down the coastline to Long Beach this week with the ladies and kids.”
“Okay,” I said, trying to keep my spirits up. “What should Jacks and I do?”
I was confused by the tone of his voice and not being direct with his point.
He swallowed a bite of meat and wiped his mouth with a cloth napkin. “I wasn’t sure if you and Jacks wanted to spend the rest of the week with the ladies and the children or go back in the chopper.”
I swallowed a bite of the ham I’d sliced into. “Didn’t you have plans to run more tests on Jacks?”
“I will proceed with ordering more tests once the surgery is decided upon,” he said.
Guess I can’t get mad when he does what I tell him to do and act like the surgeon instead of a boyfriend, I thought, completely uncomfortable with this conversation.
“We’ll probably just go home with everyone. I need to stay focused on our next steps, anyway. I need to find a place to rent, find a car, and—” I stopped when I felt my heart rate pick up a little at the thought of the responsibilities I’d been neglecting. Getting caught up in this billionaire wonderland was effortless, but I needed to start prioritizing things.
“Jessa,” Ash said from across the table, “you’re staying in Malibu, right?”
“Yeah, we are for now,” I responded more calmly than I felt.
“Jake and I have a beach home there, and we rarely use it.” She pursed her lips and looked at Jake, who was nodding along with her, “You’re most welcome to it if that helps ease the burden of everything that’s going on.”
“I couldn’t,” I said. “I can’t thank you enough for the kind offer, but I really couldn’t.”
“Why the hell not?” Jake asked, sitting back and sipping a beer after inhaling his lunch. “We’ve got no use for the place. We always rent it out during fall and winter; what’s one month early? The place is yours for as long as you need it. No strings attached, of course. Use it before the cobwebs take over.”
“And don’t say no because you think it’s rude to say yes,” Ash insisted. “We wouldn’t offer if we didn’t want to help make your life easier. You aren’t putting anybody out or anything.”
I felt tears pool in my eyes at their generosity, and the relief that washed over me was bigger than I expected. “Okay, yes. I really can’t thank you enough,” I said. I laughed and smiled at Cameron.
“He’s got a pretty badass Bugatti parked there, too,” Cam said, grinning at Jake. “I’m sure he’d be happy to let you run that sucker back and forth between appointments.”
“I’m afraid that’s where the charity dies on my behalf,” Jake laughed. “You can, however, use Ash’s Land Rover. I’m sick of acting like we’re the Brady Bunch in that thing anyway.”
Ash rolled her eyes. “Is that what you think about it?”
“It’s a Land Rover, not a minivan,” Jim said. “Don’t be such a whiny bitch about it, Jake.”
Because the children were eating in another area of the yacht, I finally heard Jim speak up more. The striking man, who could’ve been Jake’s twin, had previously seemed stiff and reserved. I liked this side of him.
“I’m the bitch?” Jake questioned in a funny high-pitched voice as if he were astonished at what Jim had said. “Shall we address your bitchiness with the fact that you insist on being chauffeured in a Bentley everywhere you go?”
“Oh, fuck that,” Jim said, rolling his eyes.
“Nah,” Cameron jumped in with a laugh. “Addy told me she thought you didn’t know how to drive the first time you rolled up to McDonald’s in that Bentley.”
“Hey, assholes, would you please stop bickering for half a second?” Collin interrupted and looked at me. “Elena and I have a Range Rover that we hardly ever drive. It’s yours.”
“Collin,” I went to speak but stopped when he put his hand up.
“If Elena didn’t have to leave for work last night, she would be sitting here and insisting on it.” He leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table, exhaling as he looked at me seriously. “Please don’t make me go home to my gorgeous, fiery Cubanita goddess and explain why I allowed her new friend to stress out about transportation when we have cars at home collecting dust.” Collin raised his eyebrows at me expectantly. “She wouldn’t hear of it, and everyone knows what my goddess wants, my goddess gets.”
“He ain’t lying about that,” Jake teased his friend as everyone laughed.
“Seriously, though,” Collin continued, leaning back in his chair. “We’re all here to help, and we want to help. So, take the week and enjoy the Pacific Ocean while we dummies get back to work.”
“Speaking of work, I work remotely, so I probably need to get back too,” I said.
“Every mother electronic device you might need for business is on this yacht. There are even four meeting rooms if you need to do a video conference or something,” Jake said.
“Really?” I questioned. I shouldn’t have been surprised. This yacht was insane.
He chuckled. “If I want Jim or Alex and Spencer to get on this boat, they can’t be cut off from their empires, you know. God forbid the Wi-Fi not work; they’d probably jump overboard and swim to shore if that happened.”
“Very funny,” Jim said as Avery laughed and knowingly nudged him on his side.
“Wow, okay. Well, let me think about it. It just makes me feel a little irresponsible, like it shouldn’t be this easy.”
“Life is hard enough, Jessa,” Collin said. “Take help when offered because not all problems have such an easy solution. No need to drown when everyone is throwing a life preserver; you feel me?”
He was right. I didn’t have to decline their offers because my ego or sense of decorum told me to. I had a lot of issues to tackle, and now, because they were so generous, worrying about a place to stay and a way to get around wouldn’t be on that list.
“You’re right,” I said with a smile of relief and gratitude. “You should be a therapist.”
“I’m married to one,” he chuckled. “And when I forget to stay positive, she handles that shit with a quickness.”
“I appreciate all of this, thank you all,” I said with as much gratitude as I felt.
Cam rose and glanced over at me. “So, you’ll be staying aboard, then?” He smiled, but his eyes were sad, and I felt that in my heart.
“I just might,” I said with a smile.
He looked at the others at the table, “I’m going to head to my room for a bit. I’ll see you all on deck after the storm passes.” He waved his hand in the air as he quickly went away.
I knew something deeper was going on with Cameron, and I was the cause of his sadness. I could tell he was grateful for the generosity of his friends, but something wasn’t right with him.
“Would you all excuse me?” I said, standing up.
“Absolutely,” Jake said too quickly.
“No worries,” Jim said, staring curiously in the direction where Cameron disappeared.
“Relax,” Collin added. “The kids are with the activity coordinator, and, trust me, they’re having a shit-ton more fun than we will for the rest of the day.”
“Activity coordinator?” I questioned.
“Yep,” Jake grinned. “Best damn hire I’ve ever made on this yacht. It’s practically like dropping them off at Disneyland. The only bad part is that Jacks may never want to get off this thing once it reaches Long Beach.”
Jim laughed. “No shit. Addy would rather be on this yacht than my company one, and she named the goddamn thing.”
The rest of the gang continued talking while I went hunting for Cameron’s room.
This place was like a floating palace, and I should’ve known better than to go roaming these halls alone without a freaking map. I could tell the bad weather had arrived because I felt it moving a bit for the first time being on this yacht. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to notice.
“May I guide you to your stateroom?” a woman asked behind me.
“I’m looking for my friend, Cameron Brandt?” I said when I turned back to find a beautiful young lady.
She nodded. “Dr. Brandt is on the upper deck. Follow me, and I’ll take you to him.”
I followed the woman until we reached the door that led to the outside deck of the ship, and she opened it for me.
“Thank you,” I softly said.
The door opened and closed during a loud grumble of thunder, so Cam had no idea I was standing out here. He leaned against the railing on his forearms, his hands clasped together, as the rain fell into the choppy gray water below. He had one foot propped up on the bottom rail, but his attention seemed to be focused on his hands.
He was so unbelievably handsome, and I knew what I was about to do.
Skydiving in this weather would’ve probably been safer than trusting this man with my heart again, but here I stood. I felt years of heartache and grief fall off me like scales when I allowed myself to open my heart again to the tall, dark, and handsome man resting against this boat’s rail.
Everything inside of me told me this was a good thing. This is why fate brought this man back into my life. I needed him more than I would’ve ever allowed myself to admit.
And, somehow, I wasn’t scared.
