Although Cam didn’t believe I’d cried my eyes out on the Yosemite trip because I felt happy, it was true. He didn’t press me for more information, though, and I was grateful for that because I honestly had no other explanation for the tears.
Being in a place of total happiness, relief, and, I guess, just feeling like everything was right and good brought me emotionally to my knees in gratitude for where I was in life.
I was so thankful that I took this chance with Cameron. For the last month, all we’d done was enjoy our time together. Whether riding bikes on trails up the coast, watching Jacks and Cam throw the football around in front of the beach house, or sitting around the living room and watching basketball, it was refreshing and soothing to my once overwhelmed and exhausted soul.
Jacks had caught on to the fact that his doctor and I were an item, and though I expected him to flare up a little about it, the kid adored Cameron so damn much that he was practically planning our wedding day.
I’d come very close to telling Jacks that Cam was his father because I was beginning to feel like we were lying to him these days by not doing so. I didn’t, though, because I trusted Cam when he said that Jacks needed to be mentally strong to recover from surgery. He didn’t need to think about anything other than working his ass off to get his life back.
“So, you guys will be gone for a week?” Jacks asked, taking my bag from the trunk and placing it on my suitcase. “You sure you’re not going to Mexico to get married?”
I rolled my eyes, still unsure of leaving Jacks, but I trusted that he was in excellent care with Jake and Ash. I think Jacks was going to bounce around and visit everyone he’d simply adopted as his own—either as aunt or uncle—since Cam and I got close. We’d spent a lot of evenings during this last month being around all of them, and it brought me joy to see him develop those relationships so quickly.
“Right, because everyone goes to Mexico to get married on a whim?” I said, grabbing him and hugging him tightly. “You know you’d be the first to know if I was going to get married.”
“What if he proposes?” Jacks said, his thumb pointing back at where Cam was discussing something with the pilot of the private aircraft.
My eyes widened at that thought. “Um,” was all I could say.
“Ha,” Jacks said, hugging me tightly again.
“Hey,” I stepped back, “I know that for this last month, I’ve probably not seemed like your normal mother, and even though I’ve done some fun and crazy stuff with Cam, nobody is pushing it on the marriage stuff. I just called off an engagement, if you don’t remember?”
Jackson laughed, “That was because you were marrying the wrong man.”
“You just like Cam because he’s fun and spontaneous and makes you feel like there are no problems in the world.”
“Isn’t that why you like him?” Jacks said.
More like why I love him.
“True,” I answered.
“Well, I love the new side of you that he brings out. You’re finally smiling all the time and enjoying your life. You’re not as worried about me as you always were.”
“I love this side of your mother, too,” Cam said, turning back to us. “What are we talking about anyway?”
“Mom has changed because of you. She’s happier, gets out more, and has fun,” Jacks finished with a cheesy grin.
Cameron draped his arm around Jacks. “I agree. She seemed to be so, I don’t know, serious and, dare I say, boring before I came into her life, don’t you think?”
“Can we please go? What did the pilot say?” I asked, searching for a new subject.
“Damn, well, I guess this is goodbye?” Jacks said, his cursing taking on a whole new level since hanging around Cam’s buddies.
“Shoot,” I said. “Come here. Okay, Edmond will drive you to Jake and Ash’s house, right?”
“Yes, and they have all my emergency contact information. I’m staying with them for the week since Jake is working in the place of that doctor who’s out on paternity leave.”
“Give them hell,” Cam said, ruffling the top of Jackson’s hair. “You can still come with us if you want. I have a lovely villa I reserved for the week.”
Jacks shook his head, “You two go and have fun. Jake mentioned something about courtside tickets to a basketball game this week.”
“Really?” Cam said, turning to face Jacks. “Where’d that asshole get the tickets?”
“I have no idea, but I’m not turning that shit down.”
“That’s my little buddy. See, I’ve got it all worked out so that by the time I get home, you’ll be the biggest Lakers fan I know.”
“Dream on,” Jacks joked back.
“I’ll bet you one of my surfboards and surfing lessons that you will love the mother fucken Lakers by the time I step off that jet,” Cam said, pointing at the plane waiting for us to board whenever we finished this brilliant conversation.
“Language?” I said, staring at Cam.
“Yeah,” Jacks said, punching Cameron in the arm, “watch your language!”
Cam looked at me, and I had to cover my smile.
“You realize he’s staying with Jacob Mitchell, right?”
“Yeah, and Ash, and more importantly, little John, who will not allow vulgarity,” I added.
“Do you really believe that?” Cam said, turning back to Jacks. “Enjoy letting the curse words fly in support of the Lakers when you go with Jake. I wish I could be there to enjoy a beer and the game with you.”
“Unfortunately, you have to go on vacation with Mom.”
“And he can’t even cuss,” I said.
“Whatever will I do?” Cam said, and then he patted Jacks on the arm. “Remember, Ash is bringing you in for that scan I ordered. I’ll be looking at it when I get back, and you better believe your ass that I’m going to start putting some heavy pressure on you to decide on this surgery then.”
“Got it,” Jacks said, more deflated.
“I know it’s hard, but I want you to focus on this last month. Look at the support group you have surrounding you now. We’re all in this with you, kiddo,” Cam said, and I could see Jackson’s eyes light up a little.
“It is good to have all of you,” he said.
“Jackson, are you sure you don’t want to come with us?” I asked, starting to feel uneasy about leaving my son.
“Mom, like Cam said, sometimes you have to let them grow up a little.”
“Yeah, Cam did say that, but that was before I remembered that I was sending you to stay an entire week with Jake.”
He smiled, “I’m leaving before Mom insists I go with you guys.” Jackson leaned in and gave me another quick hug before turning and walking off. “Love you.”
“Love you too, Jacks,” I said.
Cam brought his arm around me. “Ready to do this?”
I looked around for the luggage. “Um, what the hell happened to our bags?”
“The captain is loading it for us,” he said, walking me toward the plane. “And the flight attendant already has your favorite pasta ready to serve once we’re in the air.”
“Holy shit, is that how these private jets work?”
“Yeah, Jim pays these guys the big bucks to ensure every need is met while we fly the friendly skies.”
“Now you’re just being an ass,” I said.
“True,” he kissed my temple. “Let’s get away and have some fun.”
It seemed like all I did these days was have fun, and part of me questioned whether I should. Don’t get me wrong; it was an enjoyable escape from the stresses of everything—one I told myself repeatedly that I deserved—but I could sense that I wasn’t very grounded.
I was out here, living my best life, but I wasn’t as attentive as usual with Jackson. I think he enjoyed that part, actually, but it was a foreign feeling to me.
Regardless, I planned to find balance in my new life with Cam when we returned from Mexico. As Cam said, it was time to start putting more pressure on Jacks for this surgery. The seizures were coming regularly, which was why Cameron ordered the scans, and therefore, we needed to make a decision.
“We do need to focus more on getting Jacks more confident in this surgery,” Cam said once we were on our way, climbing altitudes in the jet.
“Yeah, I one-hundred percent agree with you on that.” I turned to face him on the leather couch we sat on. “Although, we’re on our way to Mexico. Not quite sure how that helps Jacks to become more confident about surgery.”
Cam sipped his beer. “Don’t you worry your sexy little ass about that,” he said proudly. “I’ve got Jake and Collin on the case in our absence.”
“I will say that’s an excellent idea,” I smiled at him, casually sitting back and reclining, “but I’m not so sure those two aren’t just going to screw off and play with Jacks, instead of talking him into losing half his brain in surgery.”
He shook his head. “Those two might fuck around a lot, but they know what’s at stake, and they’ll do anything to get Jacks better. Trust me on that.”
“How are you managing all of this time off work anyway?”
“I’ve only taken two weeks off in the last two months.”
“And if I took two weeks off in the last two months at my previous job, they’d fire my ass.”
“Allow me to correct myself since you just re-entered my life close to three months ago or so.”
“I’m listening,” I said, sipping my champagne.
“I planned this week to Mexico a year ago. I’ve only taken maybe a couple of weeks off this entire year. But taking a solid seven days in a row is unheard of with me. I was owed this. That’s why I planned it a year ago when everyone was up my ass to take more than a couple of days off at a time.”
“What about your trip to the resort in Jamaica?”
His eyes widened before he rolled them. “Not even a week off, but I felt like I was at that resort for a year with those morons.”
“Strange.”
“What’s so strange about it?” he said, confused and laughing. “Most people take the vacations they earn. I usually don’t, but you’ve been around me the few times I have.”
“I guess I always expected—” I put my hand on his knee and smiled. “Don’t take offense when I say this.”
“I’ll be offended if you don’t tell me,” he said, studying me with a slight smile.
I laughed. “When we were dating in college, I always wondered if I’d be some lonely wife of a surgeon who lived at the hospital. Sort of like your career would be the third person in our relationship, taking you away from me.”
“Well, that would’ve definitely been the case,” he stated factually. “And I’m glad, for that reason only, that we didn’t marry young. Perhaps we split for all that time so we could truly appreciate each other when we were blessed to be together again.”
“Yes,” I leaned over and met his perfect lips with a tiny peck. “I think you’re right. We could’ve been a real mess if we married young.”
“Shit,” his eyes widened, and he took another sip of beer. “You’d be screwing the pool boy—”
“And you’d be screwing some intern or nurse.”
“And—” He went to continue our lame accusations but stopped. “Hell, no. I wouldn’t be screwing anyone at the hospital. No one in the world is better than you, whether I’m a doctor who works around the clock or not. No way I would have ever cheated on you.”
“I disagree,” I answered, remembering when we went through a rough patch, and my friends reported that my man was spotted with a university cheerleader.
“No,” he shook his head. “Brandy Hightower set my ass up. You know that shit, too.”
“Nothing ever happened between you two?” I questioned.
“Legs,” he chuckled. “That’s what everyone on the team called her. That one wished she could’ve taken advantage of my broken heart. And yes, she tried.”
“The picture the girls took didn’t show you pushing her off you when she was kissing you topless.”
He rolled his eyes. “Well, I was an idiot boy whose girl dumped him days before, trying to move on. So, yeah. I guess I enjoyed her tits and a kiss.”
“Look at us,” I stopped, took another sip of the champagne, and shook my head. “We’re talking like we are back in college, and I’m the jealous girlfriend.”
He put his hand on my knee. “So long as you’re my girl again, I’ll gladly talk drama from years past. I don’t give a shit.”
“Oh, trust me, it’ll get old fast, and you would give a shit.”
Let’s just enjoy this vacation because once we get back, shit will get real with this surgery. Even though I plan to be involved in every part of this recovery, you will see why it was lovely to have me away from that hospital for a week.”
“That bad, eh?”
“Damn place holds me prisoner sometimes. At least it feels that way.”
“I’m excited to do this, you know? Just like the hospital holds you prisoner, I feel like my stress and worrying about Jacks has been holding me hostage as well.”
“It’s perfect, then. You and me getting a fresh start.”
“By playing around?” I said, referring to our carefree lifestyle these days.
“If that’s what you want to call it. Yes, beautiful,” he leaned over, slid his hand over the back of my neck, and kissed me, “let’s play around a little.”
