Our bags are packed. Everything is ready to go. I packed away everything else into a few storage boxes with a note for Harper saying, “Please take anything you’d like and give out the rest to the villagers who might want it.”We can’t take that much, especially considering I have to carry Jasper too.
It’s time to get him from school. I managed to sell a few things in the market and purchased us two tickets on the next ship leaving Zerva.
To be honest, I’m scared to death about what we might encounter in Zhoig. It feels as though I’m betraying my parents’ wishes for me by going back there.
But I can’t live without Kerym anymore. I’ve given up on the idea that I can just be content seeing him every few months when he gets a break from work to come see Jasper. I love him. Jasper loves him too. It’s cruel to keep us separated because of some notion I have that I have to live here to be happy.
I need my family, I need us to be whole again. Two and a half years is too long for us all to go without each other. No more.
Picking up my bags, and Jasper’s satchel, I walk to the front door and turn around, touching the frame lightly. I set the bags on the porch and stare at my now empty house. Maybe someone else will move in here, some other young, single mom who needs a fresh start in life.
Maybe this can be her fresh start now.
With a wistful smile, I pick my bags up and head down the steps of the porch, onto the path that will take me to the school.
I pass by the homes of the other villagers who I met while working here. There’s Lilah’s cottage. She’s elderly and could no longer work in the hidium mines. There’s Horace’s bungalow—he got injured in a mining accident and couldn’t lift the carts anymore, so he got himself sent here to work as a fisherman.
So many of us came here looking for a new start. This place was a paradise compared to where we were from. And I’ll always be thankful for the time I spent here.
But I’m not sad to leave. I’m excited. New adventure awaits, just like I told Jasper. This is an adventure for us, leaving home.Nothing to be scared of, I tell myself.
I pass the overseer’s office. Iheru was definitely not the kindest man but he was tolerable. I don’t know if I’ll miss him but I’ll definitely never have a boss like him ever again.
As I pass by the pathway through the copse of trees that leads to the city center, I remember sharing a kiss with Kerym there the other day. It was so magical. I never wanted it to end. This whole place cast a magical spell over me, making me feel like I was living a charmed life.
But nothing will ever truly be paradise for me without Jasper and Kerym around. I can’t keep living here and pretend that everything is okay when it’s not, when I know that I made the choice to push the man I love away.
Everything is going to be new and different on Oshta. I may have been born there but I grew up on Tlouz. I’ll get to see where I come from.
The school is just letting out when I arrive and Jasper is practically bouncing off the walls. His teacher tells me that they’re sorry to say goodbye. Jasper has apparently been talking all morning about how he’s going on a big boat to see Daddy.
“Mama when we leave?” he asks, all but dancing around me in circles.
“We’re leaving now, baby,” I tell him, picking him up. “Are you ready?”
“Yes! Gonna see Daddy!” he yells. I wince and glance at the other students and the teacher, hoping we’re not being too disruptive.
No one else seems to mind Jasper’s excitement, thank goodness. I hug him and we start walking but he wants to get down, insisting that he wants to carry his own satchel.
He’s growing up so much. I’m glad that Kerym can be part of his life from now on, that he doesn’t have to miss anything else. The entire way to the docks I have to keep reminding Jasper not to run and to keep a hold of his bag.
“We go on boat now?” he asks every few minutes.
“Yes, we’re going to the ship right now baby,” I tell him.
“And we gonna see Daddy?”
“Yep. We’re going to go find Daddy and tell him how much we love him, aren’t we?”
“Yes! We love Daddy!” Jasper cheers.
The docks are coming up and a flutter of nerves rises in my belly at the sight. This is really it. We’re really leaving Zerva for good.
“Hi, we’re here for the next ship departing for Oshta,” I tell the sailor working there who’s collecting tickets.
“There’s been a delay with the ship,” he tells me. “The departure has been pushed back.”
“Why?”
“Not sure. Got a message from the captain a few hours ago. Shouldn’t be too much longer,” he reassures me.
“Can we leave our luggage here?” I ask.
“Yeah, the porter will watch it,” he says, waving his hand to the pile of luggage from other passengers departing with us.
“Come on, Jasper. Let’s get a snack for the trip,” I tell him, taking his hand. My stomach is in knots. Is this delay a sign? Maybe it’s showing us that we shouldn’t be leaving after all.
Or maybe I’m just letting my nerves get the better of me. I know that I’m being silly. I thought long and hard about this. I’m making the right decision. Nothing to do now but wait for the ship to arrive.
“What do you want to eat?” I ask my son, who is chattering away to his stuffed toy about seeing Daddy again.
“Molcake!” he exclaims. He means he wants a molusket cake. Thank goodness there are some at one of the stalls nearby. I wouldn’t want to have to go all the way into town to appease his appetite right now.
“Alright, here, you sit here and I’m going to get us some cakes,” I tell him. “Stay right there, don’t you go wandering off. We don’t want to miss the big boat for Daddy, okay?”
“Okay mama,” Jasper nods, braid bouncing. I walk over to the stall, just a few feet away and stand at the line.
I can’t wait to see Kerym’s face when we show up. I wonder where he is. He said he was headed to Vhoig first to talk to his family, but he also said the General wanted him back at Camp Horizon, in Tlouz.
I hope we can find him quickly. It doesn’t matter. If it takes us a long time, I won’t stop looking. I’m going to do everything in my power to reunite us, to make us a family again.
Ever since I first laid eyes on Kerym, all those years ago, I knew he was the one. There was something about him that drew me in. He was incredibly handsome, yes, but it was more than that.
He was so kind. He swooped in and helped me with that overseer, redirecting him easily and took charge of the situation without being overbearing. It was sexy and hot but it was also sweet and intriguing.
Kerym was really the first dark elf I’d ever encountered who truly believed that there were no differences between humans and dark elves. That we didn’t deserve to be treated poorly, enslaved or looked down on. It was freeing, being around someone like him.
And it happened so naturally, falling for him. I didn’t realize I was because naturally we were drawn together over and over. The two of us hid behind the mantra that our relationship was just physical but we had fun together too. We were practically mates before we were even mates.
I think I was just scared of being with him, of realizing that I wanted him. I thought he couldn’t possibly want someone like me, a human orphan who worked the mining camps. I didn’t think I was worth his attention.
But I want his attention now. I want to have all his attention and to be worthy of him.
I get to the front of the line and turn to ask Jasper if he wants a lemonade but he’s not sitting where I told him to.
“Jasper!” I call out, heart beating fast. What if he ran down into the water? “Jasper!” I race around, looking for him but he’s nowhere in sight.
My eyes turn to spot him running up to the pier, to the ship that’s just arrived. “Jasper!” I rush after him. I don’t want him to run off the side of the dock and fall in!
Just as I reach the end of the pier I spot someone leaping off the boat, running towards Jasper as well.
