I’m barely thinking straight as I walk to our bedroom, tears streaming down my face and Ares on my heels.
“Baby,” Ares pleads. “Please. Please trust that I’ll fix this.”
I whirl around to face him. “How?” I shout. “How will you fix this, Ares? Articles about us are all over the internet. It isn’t as simple as suing just one single magazine, and even if we do, it’s too late!”
I walk into our wardrobe and yank my clothes off the hangers, my movements erratic.
“Raven,” Ares says, his voice breaking. “What are you doing, Cupcake? You can’t… don’t do this. I beg of you, don’t do this, Raven.”
I shake my head and grab my suitcase. “I’m not spending another moment in the same house as her. I’ve tried, Ares. For years, I’ve tried, sacrificing my damn soul to keep her happy in the process. I can’t take much more.”
He grabs my shoulders and holds onto me tightly, panic flashing through his eyes. “You’re insane if you think I’ll let you go.”
I shake my head. “I’m not giving you a choice, Ares. I can’t do this. I can’t spend the rest of my life being tormented by my own sister. I can’t deal with the constant snide remarks, the guilt trips, the manipulation, the lies.”
“Then I’ll make her leave, Raven. There’s nothing I won’t do to ensure your happiness.”
I wrap my arms around his neck and look into his eyes, my heart breaking. “You know your grandmother won’t let her leave. She wants Hannah safe and sound in the Windsor compound. She wants the two of you to figure out how to co-parent, and Grandma isn’t going to give up until you two resolve your issues. Hannah is carrying a Windsor baby, Ares. She’s pregnant with your child. I can’t… I just can’t do this.”
“What does that mean, my love?”
I take a step away. “I don’t know yet, Ares. I just… all I’m asking for is some time to think, nothing more. I can’t be around her right now. I can’t sit back and watch her attempt to destroy my life. Not again. I’m scared that if I stay, I’ll do or say something I’ll regret. I can’t bite my tongue right now, and the last thing I want to do is harm her health. What happens if I upset her right now, and she faints again? It’s your child that’d be at risk, Ares. I can’t have that on my conscience.”
I start to fill my suitcase, throwing things into it without thinking. The mere idea of being around Hannah right now makes my skin crawl. “Besides, I need to think about whether this is truly what I want. There’s no doubt in my mind that I love you, Ares.” I pause and turn to face him. “But let me give you a moment of honesty. I’m not sure our love can survive her. She tore us apart once, and we both know she won’t stop until she does it again. What kind of life is that? Your wife and the mother of your child fighting at every turn? What kind of environment would that create for your son or daughter? What about me? What toll will it take on me to constantly be fighting with my sister? To have her sabotage my marriage?”
Ares drops down to his knees in front of me and grabs my hands. “I know how hard it is, baby. I know I shouldn’t even be asking this of you, considering everything you’ve been through so far, everything you have yet to endure, but I’m not above begging. I can’t see a life without you, Raven. I’m begging you. Please, let’s find a way to get through this together.”
I shake my head and pull my hand out of his. “I need some space, Ares. All I’m asking for is a little bit of space to think about what I want. All my life, I’ve catered to everyone I loved, but not once has anyone asked me what I want out of life. Even marrying you was something I was told to do. I’m tired of living my life by other people’s rules. I can’t keep doing this. All my life, I’ve been manipulated, forced to conform until I fit in the boxes others built for me. And I did it — with a smile on my face. What for? What did I do it for, Ares? This marriage has cost me my sanity and my career, and that would be worth it if I’d got you in return, but I didn’t. Even now, after the price I’ve been forced to pay, it’s the three of us in this marriage. It always will be. As the mother of your child, she’ll always be a part of our lives. And I… I don’t know if that’s something I can live with.”
Ares stares down at the floor, still on his knees in front of me. “One week,” he says, his voice soft. “I’ll give you one week to think things through while I fix the mess Hannah caused.” He looks up at me. “But you should know that no matter what you decide, I will never be with her. I will never give her another chance. For the rest of my life, you are the only woman I will love. I know I’ve hurt you, Raven. I know I made you promises that I forgot about, but that will never happen again. You are my entire world, and I’m going to do everything in my power to ensure that I’m deserving of you, that I’m worth coming back to.”
I smile at him, the feeling bittersweet. “You were always worth it,” I whisper. “And I will always love you. I just need to ensure that the life I’m choosing to live is one that allows me to love myself too. Being around Hannah makes me lose sight of who I am, Ares. Can’t you see?”
He grabs my hand and brings it to his lips, kissing my hand with such tenderness that it brings tears to my eyes. I see the pleas in his eyes, the silent promises.
“I will fix this,” he tells me. “So come home to me in a week, okay?”
