As I wait for Dariana outside her classroom, a warm hand slides around the back of my neck and drags me along.
“How’s my favorite girl today? My cousin hasn’t killed you yet.”
“It was a fucking mistake.”
Dmitriy tsks, leaning in close to my ear. “There’s something I think you should see.”
My heart hammers inside my chest as we push through bodies and head toward the cafeteria, the last place I want to be.
“If you need to feed, I can wait outside.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” He shoves me in, then pulls me over to one of the couches pushed up against the wall. My ass hits his lap, and he bands his arm around my waist. His lips brush up against the curve of my ear as he points across the room. I follow his line of sight and stiffen when I spot Daemon with a girl on his lap. Her black wings are small and cute, folded against her back while she toys with the hair at the nape of his neck.
“They look cozy, don’t they?” Dmitriy whispers in my ear, then, “He’s not loyal to you.” He squeezes my chin between his finger and thumb, bringing my eyes to his. “Daemon doesn’t deserve your loyalty. You’re in Hell now, sweetheart. The pain in your chest has no room here.”
I grit my teeth but don’t reply. I’m so sick of being torn apart by fallen angels.
“Don’t cry,” he whispers, smiling against my lips. “I would never hurt you like he does. If you were mine, I would make sure everyone knew. There would be no lesser girls on my lap. Only you.”
“You don’t want me. Why are you d…” I start but fall silent when a shadow falls over us.
I look up, caught in Daemon’s stormy eyes. His shoulders are tense and the knuckles on his fisted hands turn white the longer he glares at Dmitriy.
Fed up with their staring match, I rise from Dmitriy’s lap and walk out. Maybe Dmitriy has a point. Daemon doesn’t care about me. And what the fuck is my brain doing? I don’t care about Daemon, do I? Is this the point where I admit to myself that I want his attention? Haven’t I always wanted it?
As if summoned by the devil, he pulls me to a stop outside the door. “What the fuck, little angel? What were you doing in there with him?”
Shouldering past him, I keep walking. The sea of students doesn’t part for me like it does for him. I have to shoulder my way through bodies to get away. He’s hot on my trail, breathing down my neck. I whirl on him, intent on telling him to fuck off, but he grabs my arm and pulls me to the side.
My back connects with the locker as he corners me with his arms on either side of my head. “Who was she?”
“It’s none of your business.”
He’s so close that his heat warms me through my thin dress. My chest is clogged with emotions that I don’t want to feel. If I could purge myself of this need for him, I would.
“I have to go.” I try to push past him, but he won’t let me. I’m trapped as his fingers dig into my chin.
“I’m not done with you.”
“You were done with me when you let that girl sit on your lap.”
I shove him off me and set off walking, swiping angrily at the hot tears that seep from my eyes. I wish he didn’t affect me like this.
“Aurelia!” he barks, causing me to halt in my steps. I’ve never heard him use my real name before. I don’t turn around. My breaths are coming too quickly. I feel Daemon behind me—his scent, his fingers brushing my hair from my shoulder. I squeeze my eyes shut.
“You can’t run from me.”
I turn my head halfway, whispering, “I’m not the one running.”
It’s true, Daemon uses other girls to keep me at bay. He’s scared of getting too close. This time when I walk away, he doesn’t follow me.
“What are you doing up here?” Ronan asks as he sits down next to me on the roof. It’s a cold night. My breath is visible in the air, and goosebumps line my arms. I welcome the sharp bite. It keeps the thoughts at bay.
“I wish I could fly up into the clouds.”
“Yeah?” His elbow is on his knee, and he’s fiddling with a joint. As I watch, he brings it to his lips and lights it up with a click of his fingers.
“How do you do that?”
“Do what?” he asks, blowing out a cloud of smoke.
“Conjure hellfire.”
He shrugs, sucking on the joint, then peers at me sideways. “Visualize it.”
“It’s so easy for you to say.”
He doesn’t reply, watching me as the embers spark.
I lie back and gaze up at the stars. “Does love exist here in Hell?”
It’s a question I’ve asked myself many times. I see glimpses of it, but then it’s extinguished just as fast.
Scratching the side of his nose with his thumb, he takes another deep pull on the joint and looks back out at the trees. “I think so. I wouldn’t know.”
“Have you never loved?”
“A girl? No.”
I reach out, fiddling with the hem of his T-shirt. “It doesn’t have to be a girl. Platonic love. Don’t you have parents? Siblings? Your friends.”
“Do you see them anywhere?”
“No.”
“There you go then.” He tips his head back and blows a cloud of smoke at the sky. “Love is for the weak.”
“That’s really sad,” I tell him, my fingers brushing over the sliver of skin visible between his T-shirt and jeans. We sit in silence while Ronan smokes, and I trace patterns over his olive skin.
“I think to love is to show strength,” I whisper after a while, watching as Ronan flicks his joint over the roof’s edge.
“How so?” He lies down next to me.
I peer at his profile, his straight nose, and the sharp line of his jaw. “It takes strength and bravery to be vulnerable. It requires you to see someone for who they truly are and accept them despite their flaws. Love is scary. It sets you up to have your heart broken, so if you have the courage to love someone…” I drift off.
“You think too much, little angel,” Ronan says, making me laugh softly.
“Maybe,” I admit.
“I’m just happy if I’ve got a good supply of blood and a willing girl to suck my dick. I don’t require much.”
“Really? You feel happy?”
He rolls over on his stomach, peering down at me. There’s a soft look on his face that I’m unfamiliar with. My heart skips a beat.
“Right now? Sure.”
My cheeks heat and I’m grateful the darkness hides my blush.
“Your wings will grow back in and you’ll be able to fly again.” He stares at the stars overhead while I scan my eyes over his neck and the stubble on his jaw, and his wings that peek out behind his shoulders.
“I will find a way back home.”
His eyes come back to me, brown against my blue. “I believe you.”
I swallow thickly, trapped in him and the hum of energy between us.
“I can’t explain it,” I whisper, biting my lip nervously. “But I can feel something inside me. A power of some kind.”
He bounces his eyes between mine but stays silent. An owl hoots in the distance, and the breeze makes me shiver from the cold. I don’t want to leave. I like this moment here with him—how he looks at me.
“Don’t do that,” he whispers, with a slight shake of his head.
My brows knit together. “What am I doing?”
“Your eyes, they’re all wide and shit. Don’t do that girly thing where you look at me like I hung the moon. I fucking didn’t.”
Laughter bubbles up inside me. He shifts back onto his knees when I push up on my elbows. “Trust me, my eyes are not ‘wide and shit.’”
“Look!” He gestures at my face. “You’re doing it now.”
I drop my head back and laugh—a carefree sound I haven’t heard in a long time. “I’m not doing anything.”
When I look back at him, he narrows his eyes. I sit up too, playfully pushing his chest. “Get over yourself. You’re not that special.”
Dimples pop in his cheeks as he laughs. I’ve never seen his face light up like this and it steals my breath away.
His eyes settle on mine, soft and searching. “For what it’s worth, I’m happy you’re here.”
Before I have a chance to reply, he rises to his feet and takes off, flying into the night.
