The nerves were eating me up inside. The high I’d felt from kissing Theo had been slowly slipping away since the moment I saw Chad staring at us inside the Alpha Chi Omega house. He was beginning to show his face everywhere I was, and that could only mean one thing: he was starting to realize that he was the only one playing the little game he started between us.
“Fuck, it’s cold.” Theo opened the door to the dorms, and we both rushed inside. Goosebumps covered my arms, but Theo quickly draped his black suit jacket over my shoulders and picked me up like he was carrying a bride to their honeymoon.
“Theo!” I couldn’t control my laughter. “I can walk. Again, for the hundredth time.”
“I know you can.” He held on tighter. “I just like holding you.”
A gush of warmth left me as I smiled, wrapping my hands around his neck.
“And how can I not touch you in that dress? It’s almost as good as seeing you in my jersey.”
My heart grew, and I held onto the feeling as we rounded the hallway and headed to our rooms. I knew that, when we got inside, I was going to have to put some space between us and tell him what was really going on with Chad.
I wasn’t necessarily afraid to tell him. I trusted Theo with my secrets and worries, which was definitely a step in the right direction. But I was worried there wouldn’t be a good outcome, and that was something I was afraid of.
Theo paused at the end of the hall, and I glanced up at him when his arms grew tighter around me. “What’s wrong?” I asked, watching as his jaw turned to stone. I followed his gaze, fearful that somehow Chad had beaten us here, but I quickly moved to be placed on my feet when I saw that it wasn’t Chad, but instead, it was Tom Gardini.
“What is he doing here?” I half-whispered, peering up at Theo again. “And why do you look so angry?”
Tom leaned on his cane and pushed up from resting against our dorm door as Theo slowed our steps. “Theo,” I whispered again, jerking on his hand to give me some inclination of what was going on and why his spine was suddenly tense.
When he looked down at me, my heart skipped a beat. There was no longer anger. Instead, there was fear, and if I could have, I would have moved in front of him to take the bullet. What bullet? I wasn’t sure, but I’d block it if I could.
“Um, hi,” I said, looking back and forth between Tom and Theo. Tom surveyed our joined hands, and confusion trickled down my spine. What the hell is going on?
Tom cleared his throat after pulling his attention from Theo’s hand in mine. He didn’t seem haughty and poised like the last time I saw him. Instead, he looked… vulnerable.
Did he promise Theo something and went back on his word?
“Hi, Claire.” Tom’s knuckles turned white as he gripped the top of his cane tightly.
“Tom…” Theo warned.
“Okay,” I blurted. “What is going on?”
Theo and Tom both looked at me with fear, and I took a step back, dropping Theo’s hand in the process. My arms crossed over my chest as I waited for an explanation.
“Theo? Did something happen?” I slowly looked over at Tom and noticed the wrinkled edges to his eyes as the air grew stiffer around us. I dropped my voice slightly. “Isn’t this…the owner of the team you want to play on?”
Tom’s laugh was abrupt. “I’m sorry, but… You don’t know the name of the team I own?”
“Why would she?” Theo stepped forward, and the only thing he was missing was shining armor and a sword. He didn’t necessarily seem angry, but he was acting awfully protective over me.
“Theo?” I questioned. “What is going on?”
“So, you didn’t tell her?” Tom asked Theo, both of them ignoring me.
Theo’s shoulders fell slightly, and although he looked defeated, his words came out sharp. “I don’t want to do your dirty work. No matter the truth, and definitely not because I want to wear a Blues jersey.”
Just then, my heart began to race, and my head started to thump. Only, this time, I knew it wasn’t from the concussion. There was a definite regret slicing away at Theo’s poised features, and the trust I had found within him suddenly felt unstable.
Tom sighed. “Maybe we should sit.”
“No.”
Tom and Theo both appeared startled at my sharp answer, but Theo’s nod in my direction propelled me to look over at his former idol. “What’s going on? Did you find out that Theo and I are fake dating or something? Because I can tell you that it’s not fake anymore, and if you don’t give him a chance to be on your team because you think he is of bad character for lying or you think he’ll be distracted by puck bunnies in the NHL, then you’re going to be losing out—”
“Claire, um…” Tom stepped forward, but he stopped before taking another deep breath. It was bizarre to see someone so confident lose their footing. “There’s really no easy way to say this…” His hand gripped his cane tighter, and I braced myself for the impact. “I’m your father.”
My heart completely descended to my feet, and my lungs burned for oxygen. It took entirely too long for me to suck in a sharp breath, and when I did, it felt like a punch to my lower stomach. My hand immediately went to it, and I wanted to double over, but instead, I spoke with conviction.
“No, you’re not,” I argued, looking him up and down and spying his fancy leather shoes and nicely pressed suit. Even his cane looked expensive, and it was a slap to the face. With every hardship my mother and I had faced, every late bill or red notice taped to our door, I blamed him. And to see this man, standing in front of me, with his expensive taste and eyes set on Theo, I refused to believe it.
“I am,” he whispered gently.
“He is, Claire.”
Although Theo’s agreement was smooth and steady, it still made me jump. My eyes were beginning to gloss over as I stared at him with confusion.
My voice broke in all the wrong spots as surprise pulled me into the deep end. “You knew?”
I suddenly understood what real betrayal felt like.
It didn’t feel this potent when Chad had cheated on me. It didn’t feel this potent when Chad had threatened me, either. It didn’t even feel this potent when my mother had used the money I’d given her for something other than her bills.
This is what real heartbreak feels like.
“So, what?” I asked, my question teetering between anger and pain. Theo took a step toward me, but I stepped one back. “Is that how you got on a spot on his team? Was I some kind of trade or something? Lead him to me, and you get your dream?” I turned to Tom. “What do you even want from me? To come crawling back like my mother and I didn’t suffer from your departure?”
“Wait, what?” I’d never heard panic like I’d just heard come from Theo’s mouth. “You were not some kind of trade, Claire. I’d give up every last one of my dreams for you.”
Emotions were flooding me, and I would have been lying if I said I was adapted to deal with them. I hid from the hard stuff. I compartmentalized problems and feelings like they had no real ties to one another, but standing here, looking at two sets of eyes who were waiting for me to say something, I learned that I had two very serious problems on my hands and a few more waiting for me on the other side.
My fingers dug into my temples, and I cursed. “Ugh!” I pushed past both men and held my hand out to Theo. “Give me the dorm key.”
Theo reached into his pocket and handed me the key, staying in the exact spot that I’d left him. I rushed inside the room and slammed the door behind me. I was only in there for thirty seconds, and when I came back out, both men were glowering down the hall, apparently on the same playing field, and neither one of them looked over at me.
“Please move,” I said, trying my hardest to keep it together until I was alone. Tom scooted over, just far enough that I could slip between him and Theo, but again, he didn’t look over at me.
Theo did, though.
I felt him without even looking. I was overflowing with hurt and confusion, and if I thought I could stand there and look over at him as he stood beside a man who was apparently as shallow as they came, I would, but I knew the second I caught his eye, I’d feel the cut.
So, instead, I brushed past and ignored my name falling from his lips. I headed straight to the end of the hall with my car keys digging into the palm of my hand, helping me focus on the physical pain instead of the way my heart was slipping away.
“Claire, please. Just wait!”
“Oh now, come on. It was never supposed to last, Wolf.” My neck snapped at the sound of Chad’s voice, and I slammed on the brakes before I crashed head on. “Are you done messing around with him and ready to stop playing the game?”
My blood pressure shot through the roof, and I glossed over the thought of jamming my keys into Chad’s glasses to shatter them.
“You know what?” I said, surprised at how level my voice was. Chad’s eyebrows hitched upward at the bitterness coming from my mouth. He was still sporting the suit I saw him in at the masquerade party minus the girl hanging off his arm like an ornament. “I am done with the game.”
Chad’s smirk was as haughty as they came, and the power I felt while looking at the relief on his features was enough to leave a trail of fire behind as I left. But that power turned to something else entirely as I looked over my shoulder and saw Theo standing there, looking as tormented as they came. The smile that I watched for on the ice when he’d search the crowd for me had disappeared, and instead, his lips were flattened with the tiniest frown lines edged along his smooth face. His square jaw was slack, and his hands were down by his sides, and even though it felt like I’d reached inside my chest and pulled out my own heart, I allowed the hurt and betrayal of all three men in the hallway to back my next words.
“I’m done with all the games.” I made sure to stare right at Theo with my next sentiment. “We were never supposed to last anyway, right?” I briefly moved over to Tom, who was part of the reason why Theo and I even started our stupid fake relationship.
A moment later, I brushed past Chad, unable to care about his threat and blackmailing scheme. I suddenly didn’t care about anything anymore.
His hand landed on my arm at the last second, and I all but bared my teeth. My palm that had the tiniest drop of blood on it from my keys digging against my skin slapped over his wrist.
“Hands off.” I paused at the sound of Tom’s voice that vibrated with anger. “Now.”
Chad pulled back in confusion. He had no idea who Tom was to me. Was he truly my father? Regardless, Chad didn’t remove his hand. In fact, his grip got tighter.
“I will break your arm in half.” Theo was closer now, and the way goosebumps rushed to my skin didn’t go unnoticed by Chad. His eyes snapped to mine, and it was obvious he wasn’t happy, but before anything else could happen, I slipped my thumb underneath his fingers and peeled them back one by one.
Then, I descended down the stairs of Dorothy Hall and didn’t look back.
