The photo was everywhere.
I waited for the dread to hit me, followed by the shame, but it didn’t come. My only wish was that it had been a consensual photo, because it was hot. My dress was mussed, strap scandalously off my shoulder. Ben’s hand in my hair, his hand on my ass pulling my leg around his hip, and us kissing each other like we needed the other’s lips to breathe.
Even the headlines weren’t bad. Some of them were a bit snarky, commenting about how the ice queen had thawed out. But on the whole, the press was positive. The only negative thing was Mom, who had about ten missed calls on my phone with matching voicemails. I hadn’t listened to any of them.
The photo came out after I left the pack’s house, so I hadn’t had a chance to talk to any of them about it yet. But I was walking up the stairs, Wes retreating behind me. No press was waiting today, and there hadn’t been. It was too much to hope they heeded Ben’s warning. Tomorrow things would surely be back to normal.
“Hey, beautiful.” Rylan was waiting for me on the stairs. Casually dressed in a t-shirt and sweats. He put his phone away. “You okay?”
“Surprisingly, yes. It’s actually a really good picture.”
“It is. I think we should get a high-res copy and print it. Put it in your bedroom or Ben’s. Maybe downstairs in the game room.”
I laughed. “You want a picture of us making out at a club in the game room?”
“Hell yes. It’s fucking hot. Come to think of it, we should do a series. One with each of us.”
It was a statement which assumed this would work out. Why not? The idea of a photoshoot like that? On purpose? It lifted heat under my skin in a way I wasn’t prepared for. Rylan knew it, the smirk on his face sliding into place like he could read my thoughts.
“Where is everyone?”
“They all had late appointments, so I claimed my night with you.”
“Oh,” I grinned. “We’re all alone?”
He laughed. “Scared?”
“No. I’m not scared of any of you.”
“Good.” Holding out a hand, he stood. “I have something to show you.”
His room was next to Ben’s, and he went straight to the portion of his room crowded with musical instruments. His room felt like him. Light and bright and playful with an understated elegance running beneath it. Rylan was a jokester, and it was fine with me, but he was so much more than that.
Picking up a guitar, he sat with it. “Someday I want this to have words. But I wrote this the night you first came over to the house. When you fell asleep on me.” His grin was shameless.
“You wrote me a song?”
“It just came into my head, and I couldn’t stop until I got it down.”
He started to play, and I sat on the floor in front of him, listening. It started with a simple strumming melody, and Rylan hummed over top of it, showing the path the lyrics eventually take.
Watching him, I absorbed the intense focus on his body and the way his forearm flexed as he played. All the skin from his wrist to his elbow was black—one single, daring tattoo. It matched the thick black rings he had around his thighs and the interlocking circles which ran down his spine.
I closed my eyes, listening, unbelieving someone wrote a song for me.
The melody lifted and turned, becoming joyous and large, filling the room and echoing back on itself. Rylan’s eyes were closed in concentration, and I watched him as the song scaled itself back to the first melody again, this time with a small shift in key. Both melancholy and hopeful, it ended with a questioning note.
We both knew what the question was, but neither of us said it.
I stood up. “That’s incredible, Ry.”
“I like it when you call me Ry.” He smiled. “It makes me think you’ve already chosen us.”
He put the guitar down just before I pulled him into a hug. His face pressed into my stomach, and he held me there between his legs. “I’m sorry.”
“Why?” He laughed once. “I know this isn’t easy. Especially for you. But I’m not going to pretend I don’t want you to stay, Esme. I’m not afraid to tell you that.
“You can tell me it hasn’t been long enough to be sure or that I don’t know you well enough, and every excuse you give me, I’ll call bullshit. I’m not even an Alpha, and every instinct I have is telling me you’re pack. You’re meant to be here with us. There’s nothing—” he broke off and pulled back to look at me. “There’s nothing I could learn about you that would make me change my mind.”
I swallowed, both awe and terror clinging to my chest. The good kind of terror. Like when you were standing on a diving board knowing you would be okay, but stepping off still made your insides scream. “Not even murder?”
“Not even murder,” he whispered.
We stayed there, staring at each other for a long minute. His eyes were a warm brown which reminded me of brownies, and his blond hair just long enough for me to sink my fingers through. He had a little stubble on his face which scratched deliciously.
“What should we do tonight?” He asked.
“I don’t know.”
Rylan stood without letting me go, so now he towered over me and I was still in his arms. “There are plenty of things we can do that are things, but also, we can do nothing. Of all the rest of them, I’m the movie guy. I’ll always be happy chilling with a movie and cuddling.” Slowly, he ran his palms down my spine. “And whatever happens after that? Happens.”
“You mean where you fuck me?”
One corner of his mouth quirked up into a smile. “Maybe. My point being, there’s time to do things. I don’t want you to feel pressure to make everything a date. We can just hang out, like we will once you’re bonded.”
I saw the hope in his eyes, and I breathed it in. “That sounds nice, actually.” After going out last night, a quiet evening with a movie and—probably—sex was exactly what the doctor ordered. “Seems like you have quite the set-up.”
Ry had a television even bigger than the one in my bedroom, and a comfy-looking couch in front of it. “It’s a nice place to watch things. Any preference?”
“I’m not much of a movie person,” I told him. “Except for when I would lock myself in my room and marathon romcoms. So you pick something you like.”
Plus there was every chance we wouldn’t make it through the entire movie.
It wasn’t what I expected. A quieter movie about a man on a journey. Darker fantasy with beautiful visuals and a gorgeous soundtrack. There were images in there I wanted to paint.
“Are you one of those people who cares if people talk in movies?”
“Sometimes. But more if it’s something I haven’t seen before.”
“Will you tell me how you ended up with the pack?”
“Sure.” He tucked an arm around my waist and let me lean against him. “But it’s not really that exciting. Everyone thought I would be an Alpha, and it was a surprise when I never broke out of being a Beta. I don’t mind,” he said quickly. “You of all people know there’s more to life than your designation. But it ended up being a blessing in disguise. My family, the business—construction and contracting—is run by Alphas. Always been that way, and I don’t think they wanted to break the tradition, even for me. So I ended up going to school for art, and it’s where I met Ben and Avery.”
On screen, the knight started fighting. A battle with a sword where the blades were moving so quickly you could barely see them. “How did you know you were meant to be a pack?”
“Hmm.” He turned his head so his lips were brushing my forehead. “It’s hard to explain because it’s not tangible. You just know. There’s no friction or questioning. You feel a pull. Like it makes more sense to do life together than apart.”
“That sounds nice.”
He laughed softly, the sound vibrating under my ear. “None of us had really chosen tattooing, and then Ben found it, and we all kind of dove in head first. We found Kade while looking for studio space. We walked into a place that was going under, met him, and he never went back to work there.”
“Oh wow.” I’d never asked any of this, and it was good to know how they’d found each other. “What about Luke?”
“Another chance meeting. When we started Nautilus, years ago now, before we had the house or the current studio and we were a hole in the wall on the other side of town, we knew we needed a traditional specialist. So we put out a call and set up tests. Luke wasn’t even on the schedule. He’d heard about it and walked in. The rest was history. We grew together, the studio grew, we all got better, and now we’re here.”
I bunched my fingers in his t-shirt. “I’m sure that’s a huge simplification.”
“It is. But the rest isn’t that interesting. We worked our asses off to get where we are and have the freedom to do what we want with our careers. Including spoiling an Omega.”
They were spoiling me, and I loved every second.
“I will tell you, though, when we were naming the studio, we had to overrule Avery. He wanted to spell Nautilus with a K.”
“What? Oh my god. Knot-ilus.” I laughed. “That’s funny.”
“It is. We just wanted to be taken more seriously than that.”
Breathing him in, I couldn’t help turning my nose into his shirt and getting a more direct hit of his scent. “Why the name?”
“Nautilus? It has some nice symbolism. The perfect precision and geometry, the way it wastes nothing in its growth but also continues to grow no matter what. Some people consider it a symbol of perfection and beauty, too.”
What a lovely thought. To grow with nothing wasted. I hoped it would be me. Or me and them together.
Sliding down, I laid my head in Rylan’s lap, thoroughly enjoying the way he ran his fingers through my hair. Long, luxurious strokes which had me relaxing, and nearly falling asleep surrounded by the scent of summer. Shades of freshly cut grass, lemonade, and strawberry jam.
My mouth watered. God, why was my entire pack so edible? I made a mental note to ask Eva how she felt about that. The craving was so sudden and so strong, I needed it. Right this second. I wanted the taste of him, and I wasn’t going to be able to breathe until I did.
Turning, I grabbed the waistband of his sweats and yanked. “Down.”
“Es, you don’t—”
“I swear to God, Rylan, if I don’t taste you this second I’m going to combust.”
He lifted his hips, letting me slide the sweats down his legs. His cock sprung free, hardening already, and I dropped my mouth onto him. Pleasure spun through me along with cold, sharp relief.
My Omega soothed at the taste of him and the feeling of his skin. I didn’t question the impulse—fighting my Omega had only caused me trouble.
Rylan was all sweetness and tart flavor. He moaned, and it was the hottest sound I’d ever heard in my life as I took him deeper into my mouth. He had the longest cock in the pack and the urge to take all of him overcame me. I didn’t know if I could, but after taking Luke, I wanted to try.
During the heat was one thing, but this was another. I’d given a few blowjobs in my time, and I liked it. I loved the idea of something so selfless and giving someone this kind of pleasure, but I also wanted it to be what they wanted. What they craved as much as I was craving doing it.
“Show me,” I said, releasing him long enough to swirl my tongue around the head of his cock like a lollipop.
“What you’re doing is great.”
I looked up at him, intentionally locking eyes just as I ducked my head and ran my tongue up the side of his shaft. Ry’s cock bobbed, and I grinned. “Thank you for the compliment. But I want to know exactly what you like. And I want you to show me.” I sucked the tip into my mouth and loved the sight of his eyes rolling back in his head.
“Fuck me.”
“I’m trying.”
Rylan looked down at me, eyes ablaze with fire and lust. A tiny smirk played on his lips. The touch of arrogance in this moment set me ablaze, making heat gather in my chest and arousal shudder through me. He leaned back, spreading his arms along the back of the couch. “Keep going. Suck my cock, Esme. I’ll take over when I’m ready.”
If I was ready to combust before, his words set me on fire. Taking him in my mouth again, his head fell back with a groan. I would have smiled if I could. Savoring the flavor already leaking from him, I closed my eyes and focused on the feel of him. The slick hardness of him against my tongue, the way it felt to suck him deeper.
“Yes,” he breathed.
Ry slid down the couch a little, and his hands came to my head, suddenly holding me still. And suddenly I wasn’t the one in control. He thrust up into my mouth casually—almost lazily—keeping me exactly where he wanted me as he took what he wanted.
I’d asked him to show me, and he was. The rhythm and speed, thrusting all the way into my mouth. “Deep,” he said, and shifted my head, changing the angle and guiding me down onto him.
His cock slipped into my throat, and I moaned. Holding me there, his hand slid under my chin, feeling himself inside me as he pumped deeper and making sure I was taking him deep enough.
My eyes watered when he released me, gasping in breath. And at the same time every cell in my body was tingling with need. He still had me where he wanted me, thrusting up into my mouth again with that perfect rhythm. I squirmed, trying to give the ache between my thighs some relief, and there was nothing.
Part of me loved that.
“Again.”
Down into my throat, he guided me down all the way until my lips were pressed against his balls. “Right there,” he moaned. “Fuck, that’s good.”
His hips still moved, pushing deeper and holding me there until I needed to breathe.
Ry pulled me off his cock and lifted me. “Get up here and ride me.”
He didn’t have to tell me twice. I shed my clothes, and he got rid of the rest of his by the time I straddled him, sinking down onto his cock.
“Oh, fuck,” I murmured.
“You can take me all the way to the root in two holes,” he pointed out. “Now all I have to do is see if the third will take all of me as well.”
I barely remembered every position they’d put me in during the heat. They’d all fucked me almost everywhere, but Rylan hadn’t taken my ass. I remembered that now.
But memories were washed away in the wake of him fucking me. Steadily and deeply, using his hands to angle my hips just like he’d angled my head. Suddenly, light flared through my body, and I shook. “You’re all so good at this.”
He laughed, low and dark. “Esme, we had four days of learning, in detail, every way you like to be fucked. The way you come. What you respond to on a level you don’t even realize. I’m sure there’s more to learn. But it’s not us just being good at sex. It’s us knowing what you love.”
As if to prove his point, he rolled his hips slowly while pulling me down onto him, making sure my clit brushed against him so both inside and outside were suddenly struck with electric shocks of sensation.
“What else do I like?” I challenged him.
There was a gleam in his eye, and he flipped us together so I was under him on the couch as he fucked me. Both my wrists were in one of his hands as he held them over my head. I wasn’t sure how they got there, and the response was immediate. Three more strokes and I was coming all over him. Soaking him and the couch beneath us, gasping for breath.
“That isn’t fair,” I finally found the words. “You have a roadmap for everything I like, and I don’t have the same for you.”
“Learning takes time, and we have time.” His jaw was clenched, and he drove himself deeper, closing his eyes. He moaned with each thrust, releasing the frenzy he needed to find release, and I matched him, body shuddering with delicious aftershocks.
Pushing my hands into the couch, he came. I felt him jerk inside me, slowing his rhythm so he could look down at where we were connected. Ry pulled back, keeping only the tip of his cock inside me. I watched his abs flex and ease as the orgasm washed over him and felt the warmth of his cum seeping around his shaft and out of me.
When his eyes opened, they burned. That same mix of lust and awe. But playfulness too. Sharp and dangerous. Rylan was a wildcard. I wasn’t ever sure what side of him I was going to see, and I loved it. I knew no matter how long I was around him, I would never be bored.
“Why did you start sucking my cock?”
I blinked, still in a daze of warmth and the shimmering remnants of orgasm. “What?”
“Why? It was so sudden.”
“I don’t know. I just had to—like a craving.”
He smiled. “For the taste of me?”
“Yes.”
My wrists were still held under his hands. Between our bodies, he pulled the rest of the way out of me, allowing the flood of his cum to rush out. But his other hand was there to catch it. Oh, fuck.
“I didn’t give you what you needed.” He lifted his hand, dripping with both him and me. “Taste me, then.”
Rylan’s fingers slid over my lips and tongue, feeding me pure sugar. Pleasure spiked through me along with the heady taste of strawberries. The nearly too-sharp taste of lemons. The deeper flavor of him that represented the grassy shine of summer. I loved all of it, and the craving I had eased.
Not before another orgasm broke over me. Deep, quaking, and all consuming. The relief of getting exactly what you wanted and needed.
Once more he dipped his fingers inside me, collecting more of his cum and letting it fall between my lips. Yes. One final time, he covered himself in cum, this time with his cock. Dragging himself along my entrance and coating himself before moving up, still keeping my hands prisoner, and allowing me to clean him.
I savored the last drops, both of us easing as the feral need went out of me, and he released my hands and his normal, playful grin appeared. “That was fun.”
“I think I ruined your couch.”
“Couches can be cleaned,” he said with a shrug. “I will gladly trade what just happened for a couple of couch cushions.”
“I don’t know what happened. It was so sudden, I needed it.”
Ry pulled me up and settled me so I straddled his lap again. This time he wasn’t inside me. “Are you embarrassed?”
“A little.” My hands were on his shoulders, and I didn’t think I’d ever get tired of touching them. They were all different, and each of them fit me in a different way. I couldn’t picture what we just did happening with Ben or even Luke, but with Rylan it made sense. Still, I wasn’t used to giving my Omega what she wanted. Was this even normal?
“Why?”
“I’m not sure it’s entirely normal to crave the taste of cum, Ry.”
“But wouldn’t life be more interesting if it were normal?” He was grinning, clearly joking. “The important thing is whether you enjoyed it.”
“Yes.” My body convulsed in memory. “Yes, I did.”
“Then it doesn’t matter if it’s normal. ‘Normal,’ is a setting on a washing machine. Watching you eat my cum off my fingers? Fuck, Esme, I’m never going to forget it. And I will happily feed that craving until you’re addicted.”
He pulled my face closer and kissed me. I still tasted him on my tongue, and he didn’t care, invading my mouth with his own.
“I’m not an Alpha,” Rylan whispered. “But I know what I like, and I have no problem showing you. I have no problem giving you what you need either. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about here.”
Pressing our foreheads together, I breathed him in, an echo of the flavor I still savored. “Okay.”
“Should we take a shower?”
I raised an eyebrow. “Just a shower?”
“Well, this was going to be just a movie, and we saw how that turned out. So who knows?” He shrugged.
Laughing, I stood, enjoying his gaze on my skin from head to toe. “I guess we’ll see, won’t we?”
He reached for me, but I was already out of range. There was only laughter as he chased me to the bathroom to turn on the shower.
