Playing cupid
“Dude, just go to her.” James glares at the side of my head.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about?” I lie, taking a sip of my drink.
He scoffs, a little more drunk than everyone else here. When he heard it was an open bar, he took advantage of that, taking it upon himself to ‘taste test’ all of the drinks on the menu. He’s still got five more to go.
“Don’t play dumb with me,” he says, nudging me on the elbow. “You’ve been looking at her all night.”
Yeah, I have. But can you fucking blame me? She’s the most beautiful girl in the room. She’s the most beautiful girl in every room, for that matter. It’s impossible to look away. “I knew I shouldn’t have brought you.”
He laughs at that, knowing I’m talking shit. James has always been my plus-one to these events. Even if Ana had hired a girl to be my date for the night, he was always with me. Even after the accident, I always managed to drag him with me to these things, and this time, it’s no different.
“I’m your best friend,” he says.
“I’m debating that right now.”
A chuckle leaves his lips. “And I know you better than anyone.”
“Again, debatable,” I repeat.
He lets out a scoff. “You’re not slick, Silva. You don’t think I know you by now?” he asks. “You’re head over heels for that girl.”
I take another sip, feeling the burn of the alcohol – and his words – wrack through my body. “And?”
He smirks. I can see it from the corner of my eye. “Didn’t deny it, I see.”
I shrug, letting out a breath. “There’s no point.” He’s right, he knows me better than anyone else, maybe even myself, because James saw that I was falling for Madeline way before I ever even thought about it. And now here she is, as my date, but she’s not technically mine.
“So you do have feelings for her,” he says, a hint of humor in his tone.
I nod, staring right at her. Her long, brown hair flowing behind her back, that tight, silky dress plastered to her body, showing off all of her curves, teasing me, tempting me in an irresistible way. And that damn red lipstick. I swear it’s some sort of sorcery because even when I couldn’t stand her, I was enraptured by that lipstick.
“Yeah,” I admit, watching as she smiles and lets out a little laugh. God, what I wouldn’t do to hear that laugh, preferably when her lips are on mine. Over two hundred people are in this room, but she’s all I see. “I do.”
James is quiet for a second before he smacks me on my arm. “Then what the hell are you doing here watching as some guy flirts with your girl?” he asks.
I rip my eyes off her and turn to my best friend. “Because she’s not my girl,” I tell him. “She’s just some girl Ana hired.”
He narrows his eyes at me. “You know that’s not true. That is not how you feel about her.”
I shrug. “She doesn’t want me, James.”
Twice. Twice, I almost kissed her when I knew she didn’t want that. The party was a close call, but this morning, when she was cuddling me, her leg wrapped around mine? It took everything in me to pull away from her when she told me to go take care of my ‘problem’. She was so pliant and soft against me, tracing my chest with those delicate fingertips, smelling me like she couldn’t get enough of me. And then when I saw her in that dress? I almost dropped to my knees and begged her to give me a chance, to show her I could be what she needed, what she wanted.
“And you’re fine with that?” James asks.
I shake my head, my shoulders slumping. “No,” I admit. “But what can I do?”
He glares at me. “I don’t know. Maybe tell her?”
If only it were that easy. “She thinks this is fake, James. She thinks this is just another business obligation.”
“Then prove to her that it isn’t.”
“How?”
He sighs and presses his fingers to his forehead. “If I knew you brought me here to give you relationship advice, I would have charged you. I’ve got my own problems, you know.”
“Like what?” I ask him. He hasn’t told me anything.
He waves me off. “Another time,” he says. “For now, you need to tell her how you feel.”
“How?” I ask. “How do I make her see that I want her? Not just for tonight or while this fake relationship thing goes on, but forever.”
He smirks. “It wasn’t long ago that you were singing a different tune.”
I breathe out a laugh. “Because she aggravated me.” We might have started off on the wrong foot, but somehow, along the way, she’s become the only thing I look forward to. These events used to be a drag, but I couldn’t wait to come to this one just to be near her.
“And that’s changed?” my best friend asks me.
I smirk, rubbing my thumb over my bottom lip as I look toward her again. “Nah,” I tell him. “She still does. But I like it.”
“I can’t believe it.” He shakes his head, a playful smirk on his lips. “I never thought I’d see you like this over a girl.”
“Shut up.” I glare at him. She might be across the room, but I don’t want to take any chances.
“It’s about time,” he says. “I never thought I’d see the day where you stop thinking of everyone else and actually focus on yourself for once.”
My brows furrow as I take in what he’s telling me. “I do focus on myself.”
He pulls his eyebrows together. “Lucas, you got accepted into Stanford,” he says. “And you didn’t go because you wanted to be here for your mom.” He shakes his head, letting out a scoff. “You gave up New York and moved back here to take care of me.”
“You needed me,” I tell him with a frown. “Adrianna needed me. You all did.”
“No, we didn’t. Your mom is a grown woman, Lucas. Believe it or not, she can take care of herself. And Adrianna had me, she had your mom, she had Leila, and she had you. You didn’t need to move back because of it. And as for me, I’m fine.”
“You were not fine,” I say, narrowing my eyes at him. “James, you almost died.” He turns his head, his jaw clenching. “I wasn’t here, and you went through one of the hardest things someone could go through. Tell me how that’s fine.”
When he turns to look at me, his eyes are brimmed with tears, and I feel like an asshole for bringing it up when he tries to shove it out of the way, but I need him to know that I didn’t move back for nothing. I moved back because I was needed.
“Look at me,” he says. I turn my head to my best friend. “I’m fine,” he reiterates. “I’m walking again, and I’m alive. I love you, and I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. You and your family.” He swallows, his voice cracking with emotion. “You have been the best thing I could have asked for, but if anything had happened to me, it wouldn’t have been your fault.” He shoots me a smile. “And your mom… she loves you, Lucas. All she wants is for you to be happy. You don’t need to give up your dream for her, for us. We don’t want that.”
I swallow harshly, shaking my head. “Even if I wanted to go back to school… I’m twenty-three. It’s too late now.”
“It’s not too late,” he says. “And it’s not too late to start over with Madi, either.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “Since when do you call her Madi?”
He grins. “Don’t be jealous I’m befriending her. You’re still my best friend.”
I snicker, but when I look over at Madeline, she’s still talking to that guy, and I hate it. Hate that I can’t stake my claim because she’s not mine.
“She likes some other guy,” I tell him with a sigh.
“Who?”
I shake my head. “Some asshole from her school. And he’s into her too. I can see it from a mile away.”
“As much as you?” he asks.
I let out a shrug. “I don’t fucking know. But I doubt it.”
“Then go for it,” he encourages.
I shake my head, unable to take my eyes off her. “Look at her,” I tell him. “Just fucking look at her, man.”
“I know.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “But not too much.”
He laughs, tilting his head to look at me. “You do know I’m gay, right?”
I smirk. “Yeah. Right around the time you told me you had a crush on me.”
He laughs, closing his eyes and letting out a groan of discomfort. “Hey, you were the only guy I hung out with back then. Give a guy a break.” He shakes his head and turns to look at Madeline. “But yeah, I know. She’s beautiful.”
That word doesn’t even begin to describe her. “And every guy here is eating her up.” Including me. She turns her head, looking around, until her eyes meet mine, and her plump, red lips turn in a smile. My chest caves in at the sight.
“There is no way in hell she isn’t into you,” James says. “Have you seen how she looks at you?”
She’s a good actress, I tell myself. But today didn’t feel like acting. It felt real. At least it was for me.
“Here,” he says, and I look down to see him holding up a piece of gold foil, and my eyes widen.
“What the fuck?” I ask him, snatching up the condom before anyone sees.
He laughs. “With the way you’re looking at each other? You’re going to need it.”
My eyes narrow. “Why did you have this?” I ask him.
He sips his drink, a smirk on his lips. “Because this has been a long time coming. And I’m a good wingman.”
I shake my head, letting out a laugh, but when I look back at Madeline, she’s no longer looking at me, and my stomach drops. I want her eyes on me again. I want those big brown eyes looking for me, at me. I want… her. I pour back the rest of my drink and place the empty glass back on the bar. “I’m going for it.”
“Fuck yeah,” my best friend calls out behind me as I beeline toward her, ignoring every single person who tries to come up to me and talk.
I’m so close, I can hear her laugh, and my jaw clenches when I remember it’s for some other fucking guy. “Would you like to dance?” he asks her.
I don’t even give her time to think. I swoop in between them and grab her hand, pulling her close to me. “Actually, this is my date,” I tell whoever this guy is.
His eyes widen. “Oh shit. My bad,” he says. “Nice to see you again, Lucas.” He smiles at Madeline once again and then walks off.
When he’s finally out of my line of sight, I turn to face the only girl in here that I want to be with right now. “Who was that?” I ask her.
Her hand is still in mine as I pull her onto the dancefloor. “He’s a soccer player from Madrid. He was just telling me about how he bid on a vacation,” she says, with a smirk, mischief twinkling in her eyes. “For two.”
I narrow my eyes at her. “And he thinks he can steal my date?”
She smirks and it socks me in the chest. “I’m your date, huh?” she asks.
I lift an eyebrow. “Do you see me with any other girl here?”
She shakes her head, smiling even wider.
“Then you have your answer.” I tug on her hand, loving the little gasp that comes out of her when our bodies are pressed together. “You want to dance?” I ask her, my eyes drifting to those dark, berry-red lips of hers.
She places her free hand on my shoulder, and I drift my hand to her lower back, absolutely relishing in how she’s letting me touch her.
Necessary or not, this is, without a doubt, the happiest I’ve ever been.
“You know how to dance?” she asks, sounding surprised.
“I’ve been to quite a few of these things.”
Her lips purse together. “With other girls that Ana set up?” she asks, a hint of jealousy coating her tone.
I can’t keep the smile off my face. “With James,” I correct her. “You’re the first girl I’ve danced with.”
Her lips curve in a smile, but she drops it and raises an eyebrow, determined to be stubborn as fuck. “Should I feel honored?”
My hand drifts lower onto the small of her back, pressing her even closer to me. How is it that we’re only a breath away, and it’s still not close enough? “Since I can’t remember any of the other girl’s names or what they even looked like when I can’t seem to stop thinking about you, yes, you should.”
Her eyes widen, and I wonder whether she’s freaked out, or intrigued. I wish I knew what she was thinking. I hope James is right and that she’s into me because I’m taking his advice. I’m going for it, and there’s no holding me back anymore.
Her lips part causing my eyes to drop to them, like a moth to a flame. So supple, so juicy, the red making me feel dizzy. Fuck, I want to kiss her so bad.
“Mads,” I whisper, staring into those beautiful brown eyes. My hand reaches up, brushing back her hair to clutch her face. “You look so beautiful.”
“Lucas,” she whispers, her eyes drifting closed at the feel of my hands on her.
It’s the longest she’s let me touch her, if I don’t count the night we spent in each other’s arms, and I fucking revel in it, exploring her face, rubbing my thumb over her cheek.
She’s so damn beautiful it makes it hard to breathe.
But when she opens her eyes again, the softness I felt a minute ago dissipates as she sucks in a breath and widens her eyes. Her hand drops from mine and she takes a step back, my body growing cold from the loss of contact. What the hell?
“What’s wrong?” I ask her, my heart thrashing against my chest. Did I go too far?
She shakes a head. “This was a mistake. I have to go.”
My eyes stay locked on her as she suddenly spins around, rushing toward the exit. There’s an urgency in her steps that makes my heart race. It’s like she can’t get out of here fast enough as she pushes the door open and steps out into the lobby.
I stare at the door when it closes behind her, wondering what the hell just happened.
One thing’s for sure. I’m not letting her leave without an explanation. The two minutes I had her in my arms were the best of my life, and I’m not ready to let that go.
I don’t think I can let go of her ever again.
