“DUDE, YOU SURE about this?” Sam, my best friend and brother in arms, asked as I was throwing some gel into my hair.
“Sam,” I warned. I was nervous enough with his stupid-as-fuck questions.
“You know she might not even recognize you, right?”
“Shut up.” He wasn’t asking something I hadn’t wondered. Nina and I, well… we had burned bright.
That first year had been full of letters and video chats. But then, when it was time for us to meet up in Florida the next summer, my deployment got bumped up and she was accepted into some special program that required her to start right away. In hindsight, I could see how my reaction to the situation was where we started to splinter apart. Slowly, the letters started to dwindle. From daily to one every couple of weeks and then months. The video chats were nonexistent with us being in completely different time zones. Then two years ago, I’d been the one to do what we both knew had been inevitable.
I called it quits even though we both knew it had been long done beforehand.
“I’m serious, Brandon. I met your scrawny ass in bootcamp.”
“You sayin’ I’m a stud now?” I joked, and he flipped me the bird.
“I hate to be the one to say this, but… she could have a man now,” he said gently, and I knew he didn’t mean it in any other way than a brother watching the other’s six.
“I thought about that,” I admitted even though the thought burned a hole in the center of my gut.
“Yeah? And you still going? Without giving her a heads up or an easy text of ‘Hey, I’m gonna stop by’? Nothing?”
“I can’t.” And I wouldn’t.
I was a stubborn son of a bitch, one of my better qualities, but I couldn’t call her. I wanted to see her more than my next breath. I hadn’t looked her up on social media or anywhere else these last two years. Only heard about her from the handful of mutual friends we shared.
“What’s your plan here, Bran?” My plan? Stand in the shadows and observe. If she was with anyone, I’d walk away, knowing that at least one of her dreams had come true. The first in her family to graduate. Not just graduate, but graduate from an Ivy League school.
“I’ll figure it out when I get there,” I muttered under my breath.
“You’re one dumb motherfucker, let me tell you.”
“Yeah, I’ve heard that once or twice.”
“Good thing you have me, or else your ass would get into so much trouble.” He patted my shoulder.
“Oh yeah, and what are you doing?”
“I’m going with you. Duh.” I looked over my shoulder. Sam Santino stared back at me, and I noticed he’d dressed up. Soft lavender dress shirt and black dress pants, all pressed neat. Stuck in my nerve-addled brain, I hadn’t noticed any of it. Sam didn’t dress up for shit if he didn’t have to. He lived in cargo shorts, wife beaters, and flip flops, and there he was dressed like a GQ model. For me.
“Thanks, man.” I nodded. He rolled his eyes, but I knew he understood my gratitude. Brotherhood came in so many forms. The last four years had taught me that.
Nina Montenegro
Looking at my reflection in the mirror of my bathroom, I squished my face and stuck out my tongue.
I looked like an idiot.
“What’s wrong?” my roommate and best friend, Macie, asked as she popped her head in.
“Nothing.” My brows narrowed, and I grabbed a Kleenex to wipe away the eyeshadow I had just put on
“It looked fine.”
“I looked like a clown,” I muttered under my breath.
“Okay, talk to me. Why are you so high strung?”
“I don’t know. Lack of caffeine?”
“Okay, sure.” She shrugged, staring down at me.
“I did it.” I looked over at her, her green eyes studying me.
“You make it sound like it’s something to be stressed about.”
“Its not. I know its not. I’m just overthinking this.
“Or you’re thinking about the journey to get here and who isn’t here when they should be.”
“Don’t say his na—”
“Brandon,” she quickly said, and I winced. I closed the toilet seat and sat down as she leaned against the doorway. “Why don’t you call him?”
“And say what exactly, Macie?”
“Oh, I don’t know? Hi? Or I don’t know, see if he wants to meet up and talk.”
“Meet up and talk?” I repeated, shaking my head. “Really? I think he did enough talking for the both of us the last time he called.”
“Babe—”
“He broke my heart, Mace,” I said without my voice cracking though the jagged edges of my heart were still frayed. Two years later, it still hurt to talk about him.
“You need to move on.”
“I have,” I lied, but I was determined to fake it till I made it. “I moved on. I kept going. I’m graduating,” I reminded her. “With honors, for goodness sakes.”
“Nee, I love you, but you know that’s not what I meant.”
“I know.” I sighed. I didn’t have the time to get into how I felt about Brandon. “I should finish my makeup before I miss graduation,” I said hoping she would drop it. Her green eyes softened, and I knew she was going to let me off the hook. For now.
“Go natural.” She winked before leaving.
I stood and grabbed my eyeshadow palette as I looked in the mirror. I traced the line of my nose, my eyes following the freckles over my cheeks.
“Call him,” I said to myself and shook my head. “As if,” I muttered, choosing a soft beige shadow. Macie wasn’t always right, but when it came to makeup, she knew her shit.
