DINNER HAD COME and gone, and not one text.
At least not one from the man of my dreams, the man I couldn’t get out of my heart, but now I knew. No choice but to sweep him out and away. The visual was too much for me, and I giggled, leaning into Macie as we walked down the hill to our apartment.
“Sweep, sweep, sweep.” I giggled, picturing little tiny Brandons dusted over the ground.
“Oh, brother,” Macie mumbled. “I know that giggle.”
“I’m sure you don’t.”
“I don’t think those last three sake shots were a good idea.”
“Probably very true.” I laughed.
Thankfully, between gorging myself on spicy tuna rolls and attempting to drown myself in sake, I was too full and too tipsy to care.
Or care too much.
Or I was numb enough I could keep the tears at bay.
“He didn’t text. Sweep him away. Like ugly spider webs.”
“Maybe the sake was a bad idea, period.”
“No, it was good,” I said, closing my eyes as I leaned against the wall next to my door. “I’d be a crying mess. Crying messes suck. Macie?”
“Yeah?
“The building is spinning.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s just you and the sake, honey.” She opened our door. “Come on, my little chimney sweep.”
“They have brooms!” I jumped and scowled when I realized it’d been a little too much too fast.
She reached for my hand, and I felt my body start to slip, like my legs had no more strength to hold me up. But a strong wall stopped my fall. “Did the wall move?” I asked Macie, but she wasn’t looking at me. She was looking up and over my shoulder at the part of the building that had moved.
“Brandon, I’m guessing?”
“Macie?”
“Awe, he knows who I am!” she gushed, and I shook my head, looking behind me.
“What are you even doing here?” I asked him. “You didn’t text. You just… nothing. Again.”
“I don’t think she’s going to be very cohesive, I mean coherent.”
“Mind if I help you bring her in, and maybe I can crash on your couch?”
“Why are you two talking like I’m not here?”
“Crash away.” She opened the door, and I opened my mouth to say like hell he was going to come in when he bent and poof. Lifted me up.
“Whoa.” I held on. “This is not fair.”
“Hold on, my chimney sweep,” he said, and I giggled again.
“I’m gonna sweep you away.”
“I’ll keep coming back,” I could have sworn he said, but his scent made everything bad.
“Like a bad dust bunny.”
“Your dust bunny,” he whispered into my ear, and I cracked an eye open to sneak a peek at him.
“Promise?” I asked softly, closing my eyes and yawning just as he gently set me down on my bed.
“Always,” he said, brushing the hair out of my face, and I captured his hand in mine.
“I’ve heard that one before,” I mumbled, not letting go. The entire day and sake getting the better of me, sleep started to gain momentum. “Just don’t go. Don’t leave this time,” I mumbled, holding on to his hand with both of mine right before I knocked out.
Brandon
“You trustworthy?” her best friend asked, and I turned to look at her standing in the doorway.
“Yes,” I answered.
“You can sleep on her floor.”
“Is that an upgrade from the couch?“ I teased, but she didn’t crack a smile. The redhead studied me like a hawk. I cleared my throat. “I was joking.”
“Funny,” she deadpanned, not showing an ounce of amusement. Not that I blamed her. God only knew what she’d heard about me.
“I’ll be a perfect gentleman,” I reassured her, but again, the woman could probably bluff professional poker players under the table with that stare.
“I usually don’t believe guys who say that, but I think you’re different,” she shared, and I nodded. She was about to walk away but turned and looked at me. “I don’t know your plan, but I know her. Nina still loves you. You two might have been broken up for the last two years, but she’s still in love with you.”
“Macie—“
“As her best friend and because she’s the sister I never had, I gotta say this. If you’re here because you want another chance at making it work, stay, with the door open, of course, and I’ll pick us up cronuts and coffee in the morning to give you guys a chance to talk.” She straightened, standing to her full height, and I braced. “But if you’re just here to mess with her emotions with some long-winded goodbye, don’t waste her time. I’ll sit here with her and make sure she’s fine.”
“Macie—“
“She’s my best friend. I’ve watched her try to move on, but she’s stuck on you. She loves you. I have never, in my life, witnessed someone who loves like she does. If you love her or ever remotely cared about her, don’t play games and don’t waste her time.”
“I like my coffee black,” I answered.
“Good answer.” She smiled. “I’ll bring you a pillow and blanket. Her recliner’s not bad to sleep in,” she pointed out before turning and walking out. I could hear her walking around the apartment, but my eyes were on Nina.
Nina with her soft skin and her silky hair and little mole by the side of her lip. Jesus, my girl was more than beautiful. She was breathtaking.
“Here you go.” I turned and nodded, taking the things from her hands. “See you in the morning.”
“Night,” I muttered and stood, kicking my shoes off, my eyes never leaving Nina. Setting them along the wall, I rolled my dress sleeves up my forearms and scooted the chair closer to the edge of her bed.
I sat in the chair, putting the pillow behind my head as I looked at my girl. I would make it right. I’d work tooth and nail so that one day, decades from now, the last two years would just be an obstacle we had to get through to make us, us.
I’d win her back.
With those thoughts I drifted off to sleep.
_______________
“Oh god, I’m gonna be sick,” I heard and woke up just in time to watch her move quickly around me and straight to the bathroom. I got up and went over, ignoring the smell and sounds as I held her soft, silky hair back from her face as everything came up. She was kneeling to the porcelain throne, the sounds painful, and I felt helpless. I wanted to take it away but couldn’t.
“It’s okay. It’s going to be okay,” I reassured, and she groaned before more came up.
“Why are you here?” she cried before heaving up again.
“We’ll talk about that later.”
“Get out,” she ordered with a hiss, but I ignored her. Instead, I leaned and grabbed a ponytail holder from the vanity and wrapped her hair as well as I could in a low ponytail.
“Go away,” she whispered before groaning, and I kissed the top of her head.
“I’ll be right back,” I said, but I was sure she was choosing to ignore me. I went to the kitchen and looked through the fridge and cabinets. I found a glass and poured a sparkling lemon water and added ice cubes into the cup as quietly as I could. Then snuck back into her room and to the en-suite bathroom to catch her washing her face before brushing her teeth.
“Go away,” she muttered without looking at me. Despite having just lost her dinner and looking a little pale, she was still sunning. Her hair was now on the top of her head in a messy bun, and she was wearing pjs. I couldn’t seem to find my words.
“Brandon?” She turned after rinsing her mouth and setting her toothbrush down.
“I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. Just leave.”
“I promised you,” I said and handed her the glass. “Drink this. It will help.”
“Thanks,” she muttered before she drank the water. Her eyes looked over the glass and met mine, watching me like she didn’t know what to make of me. “You didn’t text,” she brought up, obviously sober now, and I sighed.
“I didn’t.”
“Why?”
“Because we both know you would have showed up and we would have fucked all night long,” I laid out honestly, trying to bat away the images my sex-depraved brain created.
“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” she mumbled, and I had to fight my body from getting hard. Or harder, as the case might be.
“I want more than that. I want another chance.”
“Bran.” Her wide eyes searched mine, and I reached out and held her hand, squeezing the tips of her fingers.
“We can talk about everything in the morning. You need some more sleep, and honestly, I do too,” I said
“Fine. Whatever.” She moved past me and went to her bed. I stood in the doorway watching her get in bed. Picturing her in her space was different than reality. Even after she had just been sick, reality was ten times better.
“Are you sleeping in that chair?” she asked softly, probably in an attempt not to wake up Macie.
“You fell asleep holding my hand.”
“Oh…” A pretty blush shadowed over her cheeks. “Wanna get in bed?
“Nee,” I warned, and I didn’t miss the way her lips twitched slightly before she rolled her eyes at me.
“To sleep, Brandon, not to screw around. That’s all. It’s not like I’m feeling particularly sexy or seductive after puking my guts out,” she shared, and fuck, it was a temptation. Getting in bed and holding her tiny, curvy body near mine was all I wanted. I would have given my right nut just for the chance last night.
“Fine. Get settled,” I ordered her. She got in bed, lay on her side, her hand under her pillow as she watched me near slowly.
“Are you going to sleep in that?” she asked, and my lips quirked up
“You trying to get me naked, niña linda?” My beautiful girl was adorably unsubtle.
“Dress clothes don’t look too comfortable to sleep in,” she mumbled, trying to hide the deepening blush over her cheeks with her pillow.
“Fine.” I shrugged knowing I was playing with fire. I slowly unbuttoned my dress shirt. Her eyes following ever single button until it was off. I didn’t miss the appreciation in her gaze. Whether she didn’t care she was ogling me freely or she hadn’t realized she was, either way, I liked it. I’d always liked the way she looked at my body. It might have made me a little bit of a caveman, but it was an ego boost. Always had been. Whether I’d been a lanky, lean eighteen-year-old kid or now a more filled-in twenty-two-year-old man who’d seen my fair share of shit, the look in her eyes made me feel like a fucking king.
“You have new ink,” she pointed out softly, and I was tempted to show her the piece that was all hers.
“I do.”
“It’s beautiful.” I shrugged and rounded the bed after grabbing the pillow from the recliner and settled on her bed on top of the sheets.
“You okay?” she asked, her back still to me as I put my hands behind my head. The safest place for them so I could keep them to myself.
“I’m good.”
“Okay.” She moved and turned off the light on her nightstand, the room turning pitch black. “Good night.”
“Sweet dreams, baby,” I rasped, licking my lips. My body was reacting too quickly to being close to her.
Her soft, clean scent, the warmth of the curves of her body despite having her comforter over her touching the side of me, tempting me. She was wrong. Everything about her was seductive. She didn’t have to try. All she had to do was breathe.
“Brandon?” she said, and I blinked, trying to get my eyes used to the darkness.
“Yeah?”
“Thank you.”
“For?” I asked and felt her turn, but I didn’t let myself look at her.
While I’d been in the kitchen looking around for something to help settle her stomach, she’d changed, and it was like being in a sweet hell. If I’d thought the sweet red summer dress was fucking gorgeous on her, the tank and short shorts she’d changed into were going to kill me. Especially since I could tell she wasn’t wearing a bra. Nina was built beautifully, but her breasts… Jesus Christ and Buddha, her breasts were magnificent. We had been broken up for two years, but I hadn’t taken another woman. Not once. Not a kiss, nothing. I couldn’t.
Not when my heart and soul belonged to her. Longing and desire had built up for too long, and I didn’t trust myself.
“For staying tonight,” she whispered into the darkness. “For being there.” Those three words clung in the air, and I knew she meant more than being in her place. She meant at her graduation. Keeping a promise despite having broken another.
“Always.” My voice sounded too deep in my ears, and I felt her scoot her way in closer, pushing into me, her head resting on my shoulder.
“I’ve missed you,” she said, and my body locked.
“Nina—”
“Why are things easier to say in the dark?” she asked, cuddling into me. Keeping still was impossible. Fuck, she felt good. She felt like home and dreams and midnight wishes.
“I don’t know. Maybe we hope no one will remember when light breaks?” I said, and she went silent as I closed my eyes, the soft whirring of her ceiling fan over us the only sound between us. Her hand moved, and I froze. I didn’t know if I wanted her to be bold and let her hands roam, or pray she behaved. When her fingers stopped and started to doodle light on my bare chest, I relaxed. The memories of her doing that in the past filled and warmed my chest as I let myself enjoy the moment.
“Or maybe it makes them more special?” she said, and I felt my lips quirk upward.
“That’s my girl… Always finding the silver lining in everything.” She was my very own Mary Sunshine to my doom and gloom.
“You really think that about me?”
“Always have, baby. The sky could be falling, and you would find something good about it,” I half-joked.
“That’s not true.” She giggled softly, and I gave myself permission to reach down and play with her hair. Her laughter died down and a comfortable silence wrapped around us. “I told you I loved you for the first time in the dark.”
“I remember.” I remembered everything about every single moment I’d shared with her. It had been embossed into my soul and infused into my bones.
“You didn’t say it back until morning.”
“That’s because I wanted to be able to look into your eyes when I did,” I admitted, and she shifted to look up at me.
The room itself was dark, but the open bedroom and the light in the hallway casted a glow in the bedroom. Nothing harsh. It was soft barley-there illumination that let me look into her eyes, take in the surprise and softness that was chased away with nothing but sweet warmth.
