I CAN’T CONCENTRATE with Crew sitting so close to me in psychology. We’re supposed to be working on our outline, and I’ve pretty much put together my part, though he isn’t quite finished. I’m trying to help him by pointing out our many differences, but we end up arguing over them.
Then I get distracted by his stupidly handsome face and the delicious way he smells. How rumpled his hair is thanks to that beanie he’s been wearing off and on all day. He’s currently chewing gum, snapping it and blowing bubbles, and I send him an irritated look.
“Do you have to keep doing that?”
He blows another bubble and pops it with his lips. “That bug you?”
I nod, glaring, though I don’t really mean it. More like I’m enjoying giving him a hard time.
“Want a piece?”
“No, thank you.” I reach for my backpack, unzipping the front pocket and pulling a fresh Blow Pop from within. My candy of choice. “I’ll have one of these.”
His gaze narrows. “You’re playing with fire by sucking on one of those in front of me, Birdy.”
“Really?” I tear the wrapper off and stash it in my backpack before I set the candy in my mouth, my lips wrapping around it.
His gaze settles on my mouth, watching me suck the Blow Pop. The longer he stares, the warmer I get, and I suddenly have a realization.
This probably looks really…dirty to him.
I’m such an idiot.
I pull the sucker out of my mouth. “Maybe I should eat this later.”
“No, by all means, don’t stop on my account.” He props his elbow on the edge of the desk, resting his chin on his curled fist as he continues watching me. “Go ahead. Enjoy it. I know I am.”
I hold the sucker to my lips, pausing. “This looks dirty, huh?”
“Fucking filthy, Bird. I can only imagine what you would do with me if given the chance.”
My body catches fire at his words, the promise behind them. I’d probably do it all wrong—what he’s suggesting. I don’t even know if I’d want him in my mouth like that.
Or would I?
That familiar dull ache starts low in my belly and I pull the sucker deeper into my mouth, my gaze never leaving his. I hollow my cheeks, sucking hard on the candy before I let go of the stick.
“Is this all practice?” he asks.
“For what?”
“You know what.”
I stare at him, pulling the sucker out of my mouth so I can say, “I never thought of it that way before. I’ve just always liked lollipops.”
His smile is slow and…sexy. “I do too. Especially when you’re sucking them.”
At least he’s not snapping and popping his gum anymore.
I decide to change the subject.
“Are you ready for the test and paper in English?”
“Sure.” He shrugs. “I figure I’ll watch the movie again and see if that sparks any ideas.”
“Have you read the book?” I finished it a few nights ago.
Crew shakes his head. “Don’t plan on it either.”
“Crew.”
He smiles. “Wren.”
“You should read it.”
He shrugs. “Bores me. The movie is way better.”
“It might not focus on the points Fig wants us to write about.”
He makes a face at my mentioning Fig. “Have you seen the movie?”
I shake my head. “No.”
“Seriously? You should watch it. I think you’d like it. It’s very…pretty.”
I laugh. “What do you mean?” I pop the sucker back into my mouth, savoring the sweet cherry flavor, and the way Crew watches me while I suck on it.
“Visually, it’s stunning. And Spider-Man is in it.” When I frown, he continues, “Tobey Maguire.”
“Tom Holland is a better Spider-Man,” I automatically say around the lollipop still in my mouth, because I believe it.
Crew scowls. “Hell no. Tobey is the Spider-Man of my childhood. He’s forever Spidey.”
“How are things coming along?”
We both startle, glancing up to find Skov standing in front of our desks, watching us with an amused expression on her face.
I pull the sucker from my mouth. “Good.”
Her gaze goes from Crew’s to mine. “You two seem to be getting along.”
“She’s all right,” Crew drawls, making me glare at him.
“Uh huh. Watch it, you two. I didn’t plan on starting a romance with this pairing.” She takes off before we can say anything else.
We share a quick glance before we look away from each other, and my cheeks feel as if they’re on fire.
Are we that obvious? Do we look like a potential romance? I don’t think so. Most of the time, he drives me bonkers with the things he says and the way he acts. I can’t deny that I’m attracted to him, and I did let him touch me in a very intimate manner yesterday, but I never thought we were obvious.
“Wren.” I glance over at Crew when he says my name. “I have an idea.”
“What?” I ask.
“Come to my room tonight. We can watch The Great Gatsby together.”
I should definitely say no.
“We’ll be breaking the rules,” I tell him, sounding like the good girl that I actually am. “I can’t just hang out in your room. There’s no supervision.”
“Wren. It’s just a movie.” He blows a bubble with his gum and I can’t resist. I pop it with my index finger, the gum getting all over his handsome face. He peels it off easily and grabs my notebook, tearing out a blank piece of paper and tossing the gum into the center of it before he crumples the paper up around it, forming a ball. “Come on. Say yes.”
I suck on my lollipop, mulling over his offer. I should definitely say no. I mean, I guess there are no rules for Crew, considering he’s a Lancaster. But what if I get caught in his room? Will I get in trouble? Would they call my parents? God, I’d be mortified. My father would probably ground me for life. Demand I come home and keep me locked up in my room, forcing me to complete my classes online until senior year is over.
No way would I ever want that to happen.
“I don’t know…”
Crew grabs the lollipop stick and pulls it out of my mouth. “Hey!” I protest.
“Say yes, and I’ll give it back.” He holds the candy just out of my reach.
“I don’t want to get in trouble,” I admit, turning serious.
His expression becomes serious too. “I won’t let anything happen to you, Birdy. We can start the movie early. You can get back to your room before curfew.”
“You promise?”
“Yes.” He shoves the Blow Pop into his mouth.
“Ew, we can’t share that,” I protest.
“Why not?” He pulls it out, handing it to me.
I shake my head. “You just had it in your mouth.”
“I had my mouth on yours yesterday,” he reminds me, his voice lowering, his gaze going hot. “Remember?”
How could I forget?
This movie watching idea is a bad one. I might end up doing something I’ll regret.
“Come over at seven,” he tells me as he draws the sucker out of his mouth and licks it with his tongue. My breathing starts to accelerate. “You can get back to your dorm by ten.”
“How long is the movie?”
“I don’t know. Couple of hours? I’ll have it set up and ready to stream by seven.” He hands the sucker to me. “Sure you don’t want it back?”
“Keep it,” I murmur. “I shouldn’t come over.”
“You probably shouldn’t,” he agrees. “But you will.”
I’m about to enter my dorm building when I spot Maggie walking toward me. I stop and wait for her, glad to see a smile on her face, which I haven’t seen in a while.
“How are you?” I ask as we both enter the building. It’s so warm inside, I’m immediately unwinding the scarf from around my neck, taking my hat off, and shoving it into my coat pocket.
“I’m good!” Her eyes are sparkling and she grabs my arm, squeezing tight. Her voice lowers. “I talked to Fig.”
“Oh yeah?”
She nods. “Want to come to my room so I can tell you about it?”
“Sure.”
We both live on the floor where the single suites are, meaning we don’t have to share with a roommate. My first three years at Lancaster, I had a roommate each time, and I remember thinking I couldn’t wait to get to this point, where I wouldn’t have to share.
Now I sort of miss it. A roommate is a built-in friend. Maggie was my roommate sophomore year, and we’ve been fairly close ever since.
We have our ups and downs, but I’m trying to do right by her and not judge. And I think she’s doing the same.
Once we’re safely tucked away in her room, without any prying eyes or listening ears, Maggie can speak freely.
“I finally got him alone in his classroom and basically forced him to talk to me,” she says as she moves about her room, seemingly restless.
I sit at her desk chair, watching her. “You had to force him to talk to you?”
A sigh leaves her and she goes to the window, staring outside. “I know it sounds bad. It even does to me. But he’s been avoiding me the last week or so. The pregnancy thing freaked him out, and I can’t blame him.”
“So you’re really pregnant?”
She turns to face me. “Yes. I’m already two months along. Closer to ten weeks. He tried to convince me to get an abortion at first, but I told him no way. I want to keep his baby.”
“But he doesn’t want you to keep it?”
“That’s what he said at first, but he changed his mind. He wants me to have the baby.” She breaks out into the biggest smile, and I wish I could feel her same joy. “He wants to do right by me, and support my decisions.”
What does that even mean?
“Are you coming back for the spring semester?” I’ll miss her if she’s gone. But how can she show back up here and go through the rest of the school year pregnant? With everyone knowing it’s Fig’s baby, even if she never says so? And how is her ex-boyfriend supposed to react to this? “And when do you turn eighteen?”
“Not until March.” She shakes her head. “That’s kind of an issue.”
Kind of? It’s a total issue. He had sex with a minor.
The disappointment that fills me about this is almost overwhelming. I thought he was a good teacher. Kind and looking out for us. Now I feel like he’s just on the hunt for a new girlfriend every semester and this one happened to screw up in a major way by getting pregnant.
Did he really think he could’ve taken advantage of me like that?
“It’s a major issue,” I murmur, and I spot the irritation flickering in her gaze.
“Look, when you fall in love, age doesn’t matter. Not that you would understand,” she bites out.
Ouch. “I’m trying to understand. I know you’re in love with him. I can see it in your eyes.”
Her expression softens. She’s just on the defensive, which I can’t blame her for. “I am. I’m pretty sure he loves me too, but he’s been so weird lately. Until I talked to him today.” She’s beaming and I swear she seems downright radiant. “We’re meeting tonight, and we’re going to talk.”
“Where are you meeting him?”
“I’m leaving with him later. He’s still working, but I’m sneaking off with him in his car back to his house.” Her expression turns solemn. “Don’t tell anyone, okay? If we get caught…”
She doesn’t even need to finish the sentence. They will both be in so much trouble. Especially Fig.
“I won’t tell,” I promise. “Just—be careful, okay, Maggie? Are you sure he’s okay with you being pregnant? If anyone finds out about this, his career is over.”
“It’s all going to work out, I just know it. He loves me. He promised he would take care of me.” She grimaces, running her hand over the front of her stomach.
I’m immediately concerned. “Are you okay?”
“Sometimes I get a weird cramp. I’m fine.” Her smile is faint as if she’s having to force it. “How are you? What’s up with you and Crew?”
I frown. “What do you mean? Nothing’s going on with me and Crew.”
“Please.” She rolls her eyes. “He sits behind you now in English. And he’s always watching you. As if he’s imagining you naked.”
My cheeks go hot. “I don’t know about that.”
“Oh, I do. I know that look. I think he likes you.”
“We’ve been getting along, for the sake of our project.”
I’m such a liar. It’s more than that, I just can’t admit it. Even after Maggie shared her deepest secret, I don’t know if I can trust her.
Or myself.
“Keep telling yourself that.” Maggie’s smile is knowing. “Want to know my prediction?”
“No.”
She ignores my answer. “I have a feeling you’re going to have a boyfriend by the beginning of the new year. And his name is Crew Lancaster.”
