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A Soul of Ash and Blood: SO I LIED


“I was beginning to think something had happened to you.” Kieran looked up from where he sat as I entered the private chamber at the Red Pearl. “I expected to hear from you sooner than this.”

“Yeah.” Closing the door, I crossed the room and sat on the chair across from him. “This was the first I could get away.”

Kieran arched a brow.

Well, it had been the first time I felt comfortable leaving the castle—leaving Poppy. She was with Tawny, and with the old servants’ door barred, and her stash of weapons removed—which had been shockingly diverse—I felt confident she’d stay put. For a little while. But I hadn’t left her unguarded. Jansen watched over her from the hall. Not that I currently worried about any threats to her. With the Duke and Mazeen both out of the picture, I was her greatest danger.

I was more concerned about her going on a rampage.

“I heard the other guard will no longer be an issue,” Kieran stated.

I took a shallow breath. “No, he won’t be.”

“You don’t sound that happy about it.”

Feeling his stare on me, I forced a smile. “Should I be?”

“Not overly so, but you sound…” Picking up the decanter of whiskey, he poured me a drink. “Regretful.”

I sighed, taking it. And then leaned back, holding the glass on the arm of the chair. “You sure you don’t have a Seer in your bloodline?”

Kieran laughed. “Doesn’t take one to notice the conflict in your voice.” His head tilted. “Or the beard you’re growing.”

Snorting, I ran my hand over my jaw, realizing I hadn’t shaved. I squinted, dropping my hand back to the other arm of the chair. “The Duchess expects word from the capital either today or tomorrow.”

“I heard.” Kieran propped a booted foot on the low table between us. “Jansen told me. I’ve also been promoted.” He gave a broad, mocking smile. “To Huntsmen.”

“I don’t think that’s considered a promotion.”

He laughed. “Neither do I, but I’ve been cleared to escort the Maiden to the capital once the time comes.”

The Maiden.

I took a drink of whiskey. The shit scorched my throat as I glanced at the bed. I didn’t see Kieran and Circe there. I saw Poppy and me. Gods, this fucking chamber.

“You know, we could already be gone.” Kieran scratched at his chest. “We should be.”

“I know, but…things got rough.” I wasn’t sure how much Jansen had shared with Kieran, but he didn’t speak up. “Her other guard? Vikter? He was like a father to her and died in front of her.” The second drink of whiskey was easier to swallow. “She sort of lost it after that. Killed an Ascended.”

“That, I hadn’t been told.” His brows rose. “Why did she do that?”

“The bastard laughed at Vikter’s death. She hacked him to pieces.” A brief smile tugged at my lips. “And I fucking mean pieces.”

“Shit,” he murmured.

“Yeah.”

Kieran was quiet as he eyed me. Didn’t last. “And you couldn’t get her to the Grove in the days before you learned that the Crown would likely summon her back?”

“Could I?” I laughed dryly, downing the rest of the liquor. “She was self-medicating, and before you think that would’ve made it easier, she wasn’t eating or drinking. Having her weak for the kind of journey we have to take her on wouldn’t be good.”

I set the glass aside. “But here we are now, given a boon, have we not?”

“I suppose that’s one way of looking at it, but yes. Now, we have permission. That means we can get a hell of a lot farther before we raise any suspicion,” he said, fingers tapping his bent knee. “But that also means we’ll have others to deal with.”

“It does, but we can probably make it to New Haven before she ever finds out the truth,” I countered. “Before, we’d have been fighting to keep her under control from here to there—and trust me, we want to delay that, she can kick some ass.”

“I imagine she can if she hacked an Ascended to pieces.” Kieran was still eyeing me in that fucking annoyingly astute way of his. The tapping of his fingers halted, and I tensed. “You’re acting weird, just so you know.”

I started to deny it, but what was the point? My head was a fucking mess. I flicked my gaze to the rafters in the ceiling. “She’s survived some horrible shit and has the scars and strength to prove it. She’s brave, Kieran. Passionate. Hungry for life and experience.” My jaw worked. “She’s fierce, even a little vicious when provoked.” I paused. “Or a lot vicious. You were right when you said we’d underestimated her. She’s nothing like we expected.”

“Sounds like I’ll like her.”

“You will.” I smiled at that. “She doesn’t know the truth about the Ascended, but I know she doesn’t agree with a lot of the practices, especially regarding the Rites, and even her position among them. She doesn’t understand why she’s Chosen, and I know…” I worked my neck from side to side. “I know that if she had a choice, she wouldn’t have picked the life of the Maiden.”

“You sure about that?”

“Positive.” I exhaled roughly. “And even though we still don’t know why she’s Chosen or what role she plays in the whole Ascension, it’s safe to assume it’s going to be some fucked-up shit.”

“No doubt.” He reached for the decanter and poured himself a drink. “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking she…she doesn’t deserve whatever the fuck they have planned for her. She deserves a chance to have a life,” I said.

“Well, if the plans haven’t changed, Cas,” he said, and my gaze shot to his. “Then what does all of that mean?”

“Nothing.” I laughed, but the sound was without humor. “It means nothing at the end of the day.”

Kieran shook his head. “You sure about that?”

Absolutely not. It meant that Poppy deserved a future, one that allowed her to live, but that wasn’t something I would involve Kieran in.

So, I lied. “Yes.”


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