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Alive At Night: Chapter 23

julian

I NEEDED JUNIPER’S ASS to be further away from my crotch.

This was the first time that being someone’s big spoon had caused me physical anguish. Juni kept readjusting herself like she couldn’t get comfortable even while sleeping, and it was even more distracting than yesterday morning when I caught her tracing my abs with her fingers.

When I couldn’t take any more torture, I slid out of bed and padded toward the bathroom.

I needed to take a long, cold shower.

Unfortunately, it didn’t end up giving me very much relief, and I left the bathroom feeling equally as…tense.

Not to mention, when I made the decision to only wear a towel riding low on my hips, I assumed Juni would still be passed out. But now I stood at the foot of the bed, about to break out in a sweat. God, it made me want to dive back under the cold shower spray when she looked at me like that.

“You’re awake.”

Juniper blinked at me, and I ran a hand through my hair nervously, slicking back my wet locks. Water trickled from the ends of my strands down my back and shoulders. Juniper’s eyes widened as she watched, similar to when I was stripping my shirt off last night.

Jesus Christ.

“Juni, do you…” I cleared my throat. “Do you remember last night?”

Her eyes darted to my face and lingered for a moment before she answered. “Yeah,” she whispered and then straightened herself in a hurry. She flung the covers off and scrambled out of bed, mumbling something about how she was going to take a shower. Her eyes stayed downcast, watching her feet as she tiptoed around the bed.

When she went to dart past me, I hooked an arm around her waist to stop her without even thinking twice about it. I should have, though. She looked at me with pretty but alarmed eyes, her hair hanging limply around her face.

“All of it?” I asked, needing to know. “Or just some of it?”

I couldn’t help it; my gaze fell to her mouth, my own memories nearly doing me in.

“All of it,” Juniper said, a hushed confession.

I dropped my arm like her words burned me, and Juniper ran off to the bathroom. I didn’t move from my spot until I heard the shower turn on, and then all I could do was quickly dress and pack my suitcase.

The thought of Juniper stripping down on the other side of that bathroom door was enough to drive me to my breaking point. I scribbled her a note that I would be waiting for her in the lobby and then left to get some fresh air.


Juniper and I listened to one of her audiobooks on the way back to Boston. She picked a new story so we could start from the beginning and promised it was advertised as a slow burn. In other words, the explicit sex scenes would be minimal, if not nonexistent.

I’d never admit it aloud, but the story did a damn good job of sucking me in by the time we arrived in front of Juni’s apartment. I parked the car, feeling a bit reluctant to turn the book off. To say goodbye, if only for a night.

A frown settled on my face when Juniper waived my offer to help bring her bags upstairs, and I didn’t bother insisting. It couldn’t be more clear how eager she was to escape my presence.

I supposed now I knew how she felt last night when I suggested she stay with Nessa.

I didn’t like it.

Admittedly, though, I let out a sigh of relief as soon as she was out of my sight. Maybe I’d be able to fucking breathe now. Maybe I could go more than thirty seconds without thinking about that kiss. Maybe I’d be able to forget about how this weekend made me feel.

Or maybe not.

I tossed and turned all night, and then, before I knew it, I was walking into the office on Monday morning. Early. I hadn’t been able to sleep anyway, so I figured I might as well get some stuff done before Juniper arrived and consumed all my goddamn brainpower.

This was precisely why I’d always kept her at arm’s length. Otherwise, it was a slippery slope, and now I was falling down it.

The sun shone brightly this morning, and without any clouds to trap the heat, it was a cold one outside. Luckily, warm air blew in full force through the vents in our office, and that, combined with the sun beating through the window, caused sweat to trickle down my back.

It had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I was preparing to sit next to Juniper for an entire eight hours and pretend everything was normal after she moaned into my mouth this weekend. Nothing to do with that.

Shit.

It was odd being at work before her. I glanced over at her empty desk, noting the line of polka-dotted coffee mugs and her arrangement of plants. Half of them seemed to be wilting. With a sigh, I moved the plants to my desk, situating them in the sun, hoping the light might resurrect them.

A minute later, Juniper strode through the door.

“Oh!” She jumped back with such surprise that the cup of coffee in her hands sloshed in her cup, nearly spilling all over her frilly, white blouse. “What are you doing here?” she gasped.

“I…work here?”

Did she think I’d resign over one little kiss?

Fuck, who was I kidding? I’d definitely considered it.

Juniper rolled her eyes as she shuffled into the office and kicked the door shut behind her. It was impressive, considering how much she was carrying, the height of her heels, and the length of her skirt. “I mean, what are you doing here before me? You’re never here before me.”

“Oh.” I shrugged. “I don’t know. Just got up earlier today, I guess.”

More like never slept at all.

After cocking her head to the side and examining me for a moment, Juniper crossed our small office and placed the coffee cup on my desk.

“I got this for you at the place across from—” Her words vanished as she caught sight of her plants lining my desk. “I swear I didn’t put those there,” she rushed to say. “I’m sorry. I’ll move them back.”

The worried look on her face stomped all over my heart.

“I know you didn’t put them there. I did.” I shifted in my seat, swinging my attention back to my laptop so I wouldn’t have to keep watching Juniper’s expression. “They looked like they needed some sun. Although I don’t think that one’s going to bloom no matter how much sun or water it gets,” I added, pointing to the one in the middle.

Juniper was silent, and I risked a glance over my shoulder at her. “It’s a moonflower,” she said. Round and filmy eyes stared absently at the plants while that voice of hers sparked in exasperation.

“You keep saying that like I’m supposed to know what it means,” I muttered before picking up the cup. “Thank you for the coffee, Daisy.”

She blinked twice before looking away from the plants. “You’re welcome. It’s plain and boring. Like you.”

I smirked but hid it by lifting my coffee cup to my lips slowly. “You don’t think I’m boring, Juniper.”

She flushed, and it was beautiful. It brought heat to my skin, too. Heat that had nothing to do with the warm air coming from the vents or the sun streaming through the window.

Juni didn’t reply. She turned promptly on her heel, hurried to her desk, and unloaded her bag. Her reaction immediately made me regret my comment. Because while I did love watching Juniper blush, I hated when she shut down. When that Juni-like wonder faded. And that was exactly what happened.

Juni was silent for most of the day after that. When she did talk to me, it was strictly professional, strictly work-related. Reestablishing those boundaries was likely good for us, but still. It bothered me. I wished it was as easy for me to stay focused on work as it apparently was for her.

Around five thirty, she turned to me with a pleasant smile, and I thought that maybe I was going to get something else out of her besides a clipped comment or question, but once again, I was disappointed.

“Do you want to stay late tonight to work on Grayson’s case?” she asked. “Or maybe tomorrow?”

Surprised, it took me a second to reply. “Let’s do it tomorrow. I’m pretty tired from the weekend. I’m sure you are, too.”

Although she’d probably slept a hell of a lot better than I did last night.

“I am,” she admitted, “but I want to ensure that we give the case enough attention. Gabriel deserves that.”

“Okay.” My throat tightened with emotion. Gabriel did deserve that. “Tomorrow it is.”

Juni nodded but continued watching me curiously as I started packing my things. It was nearly dark outside; the clocks rolled back a few weeks ago, and now the nights were long and came early. At this hour, the rest of the office was quiet. A few people had left for client dinners tonight, and most everyone else had called it quits for the day or brought their work home.

I was about to call it quits. It had been a long day with a busy mind. But Juniper’s voice stopped me in my tracks before I could reach the door.

“Julian, wait.”

I turned slowly. Something about how she said my name made all the hairs on my arm stand on end.

Juniper stood, aggressively smoothing down her black, silky skirt, and I just knew right then and there—

“Can we talk before you go?”

Yep. There it was.

“Talk about what, Juni?”

I fucking knew what.

Juni sucked in a breath and then swallowed.

“The kiss.”


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