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Alive At Night: Chapter 34

juniper

CONSIDERING JULIAN HAD FIVE sisters and years of experience buying them gifts and listening to their dating stories—likely with gritted teeth—I wasn’t shocked that he knew what a girl might like on a first date. But this? This was more than that. This was specific to me. To what I liked.

Shocked was an understatement to how I felt when I looked at the collection Charlotte had picked out for me. Julian hadn’t just taken me shopping at the most adorable boutique in Boston, but he’d also explained my style perfectly to the shop owner.

Taking two big gulps of champagne in the hopes it would settle me, I stared at all of my options, struggling to decide which to pick first.

“Put on the black one,” Julian called through the dressing room curtain, surprising me with how closely he must have paid attention when I pulled dresses off the rack.

“I already have a lot of black dresses,” I said while considering the dress in question, another one of my favorites from the selection.

“I know.” Julian’s voice had a hint of satin to it, sliding over my skin appreciatively. Whenever he admitted to knowing things about me, it made my heart skip a goddamn beat. “But you always look good in them.”

I stuck my head out of the dressing room, using the curtain to shield the rest of my body. “I sometimes worry that they’re too similar or boring.”

Julian snorted. “Nothing about your style is boring, Juni. None of those dresses are plain black. They’re all…you know, decorated.”

I giggled. “Decorated?”

“Shut up,” he grunted. “I’m not good at fashion. You know what I mean.”

The best part about it was that I did know what he meant. I liked my dresses with a bit of bounce or flair or a subtle polka dot. But it was more fun watching Julian flounder.

Flashing a smile at his grumpy face, I ducked into the small changing room to put on the black dress, as requested by my date. And once I finally managed to squeeze into it, I stared at myself in the mirror.

The dress cinched around my waist with a tiny, tied bow while the bottom flowed loosely around my hips, exactly how I liked it. It only hit mid-thigh, shorter than I usually wore, and the bodice was a structured fit, nothing like anything else I owned. The off-shoulder neckline plunged between my breasts, and the deeply scooped design combined with the airtight fit meant more than a bit of cleavage was on display.

“Let’s see it, Daisy,” Julian called impatiently.

Something akin to anticipation thrummed in my veins. I wanted to show him this dress, to see his reaction, but the idea tripped my nerves, sending them haywire. I slipped into my heels and swept my hair off my shoulder for the full effect before nervously stepping out to show Julian.

“Holy fucking shit.”

Julian’s lips parted as he stared at me, seeming momentarily stunned. It reminded me of his expression when I’d shown him my dress at Sofia’s wedding, forcing me to see that moment clearly for the first time. His shock was a good thing. In fact, I found that I loved making Julian speechless. Watching him grapple for words after so many years of verbal sparring? Incredibly gratifying.

Julian sat unmoving on the velvety couch, one arm resting over the top while his champagne flute dangled between his fingers in the other hand.

God, he was so unfairly handsome. I wasn’t sure I’d ever been more attracted to him than now when he was surrounded by pink, plush, and sparkling things. His eyes lifted as he heard me come out of the dressing room, and they warmed while trailing over me.

I didn’t need summers on the Cape. I just needed Julian’s gaze to make me feel the sun, like a hot, shimmering spotlight.

After soaking in his heat for a moment, I cocked my head to the side and returned his look. “Do I look fuckable in this one?”

Julian’s grip on his glass tightened, and he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “Why don’t you come over here, and we can find out?”

“Julian,” I hissed, and he lifted his hands up in defense before returning to his casually relaxed position on the sofa.

“We’re getting that one,” he said after clearing his throat.

I bit down on a secret smile. “What if I want another one?”

“I’ll buy that one, too.” He shrugged. “I’ll buy all of them; I don’t care. But this one is coming home with us.”

“What if I wore it home?” I asked. Julian’s eyes remained hot and attentive, sweeping over me in a continual appreciative assessment. I had to swallow before adding, “And on our date?”

“Please do.” He took a sip of champagne, eyes glittering over the glass rim. “I know how to break bones if I need to.”

I sighed, confident that wouldn’t be necessary. But the way he looked at me still made my cheeks flush, and heat rippled through my body. “Well, I think you’ve answered my question.”

“About what?”

Julian’s eyes locked on mine, curiosity lingering in them. But I lowered my voice before responding, not wanting Charlotte to overhear. There was an entire wall of dresses between her and us, and I didn’t see her anywhere in sight, but still.

“About whether or not I look fuckable,” I said, my grin cocking to one side.

Julian pushed off the sofa, striding toward me. “I should hope you know the answer to that,” he said, husky voice washing over me as he gripped my hip with his free hand and tugged me into him. Into his—oh. “And the only one fucking you tonight will be me, Juniper.”

A zap of heat hurtled through me. It had been days since he’d proven me wrong and fucked me precisely like a fictional man would, and then he’d refused to do it again every night since. Apparently, I’d winced one too many times on New Year’s Day, and now he kept spewing some bullshit about not wanting to hurt me. Although, he’d definitely made it up to me in other ways.

I felt like I was on cloud nine lately. The only time I got an inkling of unease was when Gemma texted me, digging for information about the mystery man I’d woken up with on New Year’s Day. I was going to have to figure out how to tell her, but I might as well see if Julian and I could get through a date night without biting each other’s heads off first.

I’d say it was looking promising so far.

I groaned as Julian tipped his hips into mine, grinding so I could feel how ready he was.

It was a promise for later. My stomach flipped just thinking about it, and I snatched Julian’s glass of champagne out of his hand, needing something to wash the dryness from my throat before attempting to talk.

“You better,” I finally muttered in response to his promise for later. He’d given me a taste of what he could do, and I wanted more.

“So greedy, aren’t you?” Julian chuckled darkly. “Always wanting it.”

I made an indecipherable noise, too distracted by how Julian’s fingers had drifted beneath my dress, caressing my skin in tight, ascending circles. When he found my underwear, he traced the seam down until I had to bite my tongue to avoid making other sounds.

“I’m not—” I started to protest, but Julian swiped a finger beneath my underwear, toying directly with my clit, and my ability to talk vanished momentarily.

“Don’t lie, Daisy.” He whispered a kiss over my forehead, breathing his words softly.

And then Julian pulled away, leaving me to stand there breathless as he stalked back to the sofa. Once settled, he threw one arm up again, resting it along the top.

“Do I get to see the blue one?” he asked like the last minute hadn’t happened, nodding his head to the row of dresses I still hadn’t tried on in the fitting room.

I shook my head, struggling to withhold a smile of my own. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“No, Juni.” He shook his head. His grin grew, sly and charming, and it nearly took me out completely. “I’m loving this.”

That was it. Those words right there. They were the best part about this entire evening so far.

Because I knew, without a single doubt, that they were true.

Julian didn’t take me here out of a sense of obligation or duty. He didn’t want to take me on a date simply to prove something or to fulfill his side of a deal. He asked me out because he wanted to.

And amazingly enough, he was loving it.

And so was I.

It was the first date I’d probably ever had that felt like the guy cared about what I might enjoy, but I wasn’t surprised. When Julian said he knew me better than any other guy out there, he was right.

Meanwhile, Greg Kennedy had dropped into my DMs on social media at least three times this week, but I wasn’t sure why he thought I’d ever respond when he’d treated each of our dates like an annoying prerequisite to getting sexual favors. But not enough sexual favors that he wouldn’t cheat on me, of course.

When I couldn’t seem to get my legs to move, Julian encouraged me.

“Come on, Rosie.” His look was gentle as he urged me to get going. “As much as I love staring at you, we’ve still got a seven o’clock reservation to get to.”

“Who needs dinner when you’ve got dresses?” I laughed.

You need dinner,” Julian said seriously before growing amused again and dropping his voice. “Think of it as fuel for later, love.”

He winked, knowing what he was doing.

Meanwhile, I tried not to melt on my way back to the dressing room.


Much to Julian’s satisfaction, I was still wearing the black dress when we left the boutique. However, Charlotte also boxed up one other dress—a blue one—for me to pick up another day.

I tried not to feel guilty about how much Julian had insisted on buying. I really didn’t want to argue with him, especially considering how strongly he reacted when I offered to pay the first time. But no one had ever spoiled me like this before. It felt…nice.

He settled his hand on my leg as we made the short drive to the restaurant where he’d made reservations. I squirmed beneath his fingertips, impatient for more of his touch with how he’d teased me in the boutique. Julian knew it, too. He tucked his fingers beneath the hem of my dress, tickling lightly as we pulled into a parking spot. He squeezed my thigh as he put the car into park, and I gasped.

“It must be a little uncomfortable, isn’t it?” he asked, glancing over at me.

I cocked my head to the side. “What is?”

“Sitting there wearing underwear that’s soaked for me.”

A roll of my eyes was my only response because I didn’t want him to get the satisfaction of knowing he was right. My whole body pulsed, needing him. I tried to look away from his knowing face before he could catch the truth in my eyes, but I was sure he still saw right through me.

Which was why it didn’t surprise me when his lips spread in a cocky smirk.

“Take them off, Daisy.”

My head whipped back around at that. “What?”

“I’m solving the problem.” He held out his hand, palm up. “Take them off.”

I stared at him with wide eyes. Besides the light filtering in from the streetlamp, the car was dark. But I saw the desire and mischief brewing in Julian’s gaze all the same.

His demand was ridiculous, but I found myself wanting to obey. After all, it would drive Julian wild knowing I didn’t have anything beneath this dress, and I loved driving Julian wild.

With slightly shaky hands, I pushed my dress up around my hips and hooked my fingers in my underwear to wiggle out of them. Julian’s burning gaze traced my every movement as I snuck them off one foot and then the other before dropping the damp underwear in his outstretched palm.

He raised a brow. It was an I-told-you-so brow raise. Because he had been right; I’d been so disastrously wet for him. My lips pressed together, indenting with a slightly embarrassed smile in response to his expression.

He curled his fingers around my underwear, balling them into his pocket. “Good girl.”

Indecision flashed in Julian’s eyes, and I could tell he was debating skipping dinner altogether. But after a pause, he slipped out of the car and walked around to open my door for me.

“How are your feet holding up in those heels?” Both concern and humor lingered in Julian’s voice as we walked hand in hand across the street.

“Don’t you worry about my feet,” I said with a laugh. “I told you. There’s a lot I can do in these things.”

“Can’t wait to find out,” Julian murmured before swinging open the restaurant’s front door for me.

My jaw dropped at the adorable sight that greeted us when we walked in. A feeling of warmth filled the tiny Italian eatery, likely from the fireplace that acted as a focal point on the back wall. A curved ceiling hosted twinkling lights, making the restaurant feel a bit cavernous. But in a secretive sort of way—like we’d just strode through a portal instead of a door.

Based on the presence of white tablecloths and perfectly uniformed waiters, I was glad to be wearing this dress as opposed to the one I had left the house in earlier. In his well-tailored suit, Julian fit right in as he walked to the stand to inquire about our reservation.

He flashed me a smile as the hostess gathered our menus, and I wished I could conjure up something to say. I was almost too blown away to speak. But mostly, I hoped Julian didn’t think he had to spend money to impress me. That couldn’t be further from the truth, but once again, I was hesitant to bring up the cost, not wanting to offend him.

So I settled on expressing my awe instead.

“This place is really nice,” I said under my breath as I slid into our chairs across from each other. “Like really nice.”

Julian appeared to find that comment amusing, his brow quirking.

“What’s that look for?” I asked.

“It’s just…did you think I was going to take you out for a cheap beer on our first date?”

“You do love cheap beer,” I said in defense, even though I’d always known he would take tonight seriously.

Things felt serious.

But we’d never confirmed that, and tonight, that felt wrong. I wanted to know that this was precisely what it felt like.

“Julian…” I hesitated, trying to plan my words out. But a moment later, they just tumbled from my lips. “Exactly what kind of date is this?”

Julian cocked his head to the side but didn’t miss a beat before answering. “The kind that’s repeated.”

I attempted to suppress my smile, but it was a useless effort. “We haven’t even gotten drinks yet, and you already know you want a second date, huh?”

“Second date?” He chuckled. “No, Daisy. I want all the dates. Every date.”

I swallowed, knowing I needed even more of an answer from him. Just to be sure. “And while we’re going on all those dates, are we going on other dates?”

“Other dates?” Julian repeated. “You mean with other people?”

I nodded, quickly snatching the glass of water that a passing waiter had placed on our table.

“Fuck no.” He leaned forward, resting both palms on the table’s white linen. He hissed the next words beneath his breath, voice slithering down my spine. “Do I need to remind you of what I said the other night while you were getting your pretty pussy fucked for the first time?”

Suddenly, my lungs felt two sizes too small for my body, and the fireplace at my back sparked way too much heat. Sweat tickled the nape of my neck. I crossed my legs, but that only reminded me how Julian had my underwear in his pocket, and I was left feeling exposed and aching for him.

“I love making you blush,” Julian commented with a light chuckle, the fire melting from his eyes again as he leaned back in his chair. His gaze plummeted to my bodice and then quickly back to my face. “I can’t wait to see that color cover the rest of your body.”

“So this is…” I started, bringing the topic back around before I lost the ability to breathe entirely. I wanted confirmation of what this was. I couldn’t decide on the right words, though, so Julian filled in for me.

“This is dating, Juni.” The smile he gave me was easy. Nothing between Julian and I had ever been easy, but ironically, this was. Julian spoke as though nothing had ever been easier than this conversation. “Not a date. Dating. How’s that sound?”

Dating. Not a date, dating.

“That’s acceptable, I suppose.”

When Julian began to frown, I tossed him a wink. But that didn’t stop him from having something to say. Of course it didn’t.

“Acceptable?” He rolled his eyes in response, lips twitching. “Baby, I know you’re used to mediocrity considering your previous boyfriends, but we don’t do acceptable here. You deserve more than that.”

I took a quick sip of my water, fumbling with the glass a little and spilling a splash on the table. Julian had just said the word boyfriend, and while I understood that was the entire concept of what he had been explaining with the whole exclusively dating thing, I hadn’t expected to hear that word so soon. And I hadn’t expected to feel so incredibly giddy about it.

“Okay, Juni?” Julian went on. “So either stop it with the lies or tell me what you want to change so that this isn’t just…acceptable.” He wrinkled his nose as he said the last word.

“I don’t want to change anything,” I said breathlessly. “I don’t want to change anything at all.”

It was still a little unbelievable to me that we were here, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Julian nodded and tucked his sharp tongue away. For now. He reached across the table, sliding his hand over mine. I laced my fingers through his, my heart beating so loudly that I worried we’d drawn attention.

But we didn’t. Because no one knew. No one knew who we were or what this simple touch meant. They didn’t know that we were Juniper and Julian, two people who spent years being too confused and scared of their feelings that they latched onto playing a little game instead. A game that was predictable, as equally humorous as it was hurtful, but most importantly—fake.

I’d immediately known that taking Julian to Sofia’s wedding would be disastrous because suddenly, it wasn’t a game anymore, it ironically wasn’t an act, and there wasn’t a script. We’d flown too close to something too real, something bright and warm like the sun, and everyone always warned against that, didn’t they?

But now we were here, and the sweat sprinkling my back from the heat was surprisingly comforting. And I liked that not knowing what to expect felt safe for the first time in a long time. There wasn’t a script, but there were lines I’d always wanted to hear. And Julian Briggs was hitting all of them.

He looked down at the menu before him, still grasping my hand. And when he glanced up again, his expression was serious.

“I have to admit something, Juniper.”

My forehead creased as my thoughts chased worries around in my brain.

But then Julian said, “I’ve never had gnocchi.”

A smile broke out on my face so wide that I felt it crack. “How can you go twenty-seven years without experiencing gnocchi?”

“Closer to twenty-eight years,” Julian muttered, though he was grinning back.

“That does not help your case,” I said, laughter following my words.

Although, the reminder of Julian’s upcoming birthday brought me back down to earth. We were living in a bubble where nothing existed except us and this date and heated glances. But next weekend, we would be going to Whitebridge to celebrate his birthday with his family, and other people were going to burst through that bubble.

Julian and I hadn’t talked about work or family or breaking out of our bubble. We’d just wrapped it tighter around us. For the most part, I’d ignored Gemma, feigning a busy work schedule. But she would be there next weekend, and I didn’t know what I’d say. I was sleeping with my best friend’s brother. Dating him. And obviously, I needed to come clean about that.

The rest of our meal was delightful. Julian tried the gnocchi and approved, although I doubted he would say anything even if he didn’t. Meanwhile, I had a delicious plate of the world’s cheesiest pasta. Julian smiled as he watched me eat the last noodle, feeling like I was about to explode but too happy to care. And unsurprisingly, we were able to make it through dinner without any broken bones.

Not that I thought that would be necessary. No man had ever looked at me like Julian seemed to think they would. Only him, and I was definitely okay with that.

As we slid into Julian’s car at the end of our date, his hand returned to my thigh. His fingers traced my skin the entire way home, and all I could do was clench my legs tighter in response. The thrum of anticipation was heady in my veins as we pulled into the parking garage below his apartment building. It only increased as Julian led me to the elevator, every step making my body pulse with need.

As soon as the elevator doors closed, Julian’s lips slammed onto mine.

Apparently, his restraint and control had been just as close to snapping.

“It was so hard,” he rasped between hard kisses. “It was so hard not to touch you beneath the table at dinner. Knowing you are so wet and naked for me beneath that dress. I’ve been dying to get you alone all night.”

“We are alone,” I pointed out, my head beginning to spin from the tight space and the proximity of every part of Julian to every part of me.

“We are, huh?” Julian’s hand slipped beneath my dress, his fingers crawling over my bare skin. “So if I made you scream right now, no one would notice?”

“Oh, I—”

Even if I had an answer, I wouldn’t be able to talk. Julian’s fingers were tickling the seam of my legs, caressing them apart. He wanted me to spread my legs for him, and I didn’t know how to resist—not anymore.

“I’ve always wanted to be able to render you speechless,” Julian murmured, brushing his lips over my jaw.

I let my body talk for me, shifting so Julian could drag his finger across my inner thigh, teasing my slit with the tip of his finger. And then I had to swallow a whimper, not wanting him to know how easily he could make a mess of my pussy. Except he already did know. Because a second later, he slipped his hand from beneath my skirt and brought his glistening finger—the one that swept between my legs—to his lips.

No sooner had his tongue wrapped around it, sucking off my arousal, than Julian dropped to the ground with a low groan. I gasped his name, unconsciously threading my fingers through his hair. His expression glowed, but I only got to enjoy it for a second before Julian dipped his head, kissing a path beneath my skirt.

“You’re dripping down your thighs, and it’s a bit of a mess,” he mumbled, “but since it’s my fault, I’ll help clean you up.”

I wanted to roll my eyes at the cockiness in his tone but threw my head back with a moan instead. Julian’s tongue was lashing out, branding my skin with his hot attention. He licked and licked, ensuring that my thighs didn’t have even a bit of wetness coating them.

My hips tipped forward of their own accord, straining for something more. I needed his tongue where it ached.

When he gave it to me, teasing my clit with the faintest brush, I nearly screamed. His fingers gripped my legs, urging them to spread wider so he could bury his face deeper between my thighs. He wasn’t teasing my clit anymore; he was lapping at it steadily and with intent, his tongue driving me to my breaking point.

He was trying to make me scream, wasn’t he?

“Julian, please,” I begged, my hips writhing between the tight hold he had on them.

His eyes darted up, spearing me with their heat. “Please, what?”

No sooner had he asked the question than he continued his ministrations, his sinfully talented tongue dancing between my legs. Pleasure filled every inch of me, and even though I knew I should beg for him to stop so we weren’t caught if the elevator stopped, I knew I wasn’t going to. I was so damn weak when it came to him.

“Please…please make me come,” I said through clenched teeth, feeling my knees begin to buckle and my limbs begin to shake.

Julian’s lips curled; I felt it. I felt it, and I knew exactly what he was going to do.

He pulled away, standing instead as his wicked eyes trailed over me.

Goddamn him.

“Jul—” I gasped, but the faint chatter of people broke through my thoughts, and I realized the elevator door had opened behind Julian. He bracketed my body with his, shielding anyone from looking at me, but after quickly tugging down my dress, he stepped away.

“Come on,” Julian murmured, giving me his hand. I took it, mostly because I was afraid I might fall if I didn’t. My body felt like it was ready to break if I didn’t get a release soon.

I followed Julian to his apartment door, where he stopped and looked over at me. He licked his lips while his eyes fell to my mouth, lingering on it before he finally spoke. He gripped my chin lightly before brushing his thumb over my lower lip. His voice dropped low enough that it made my knees even weaker. “I like this color on your lips,” he breathed. “But I think it will look even better when it paints my cock later.”

I flicked my eyes up to his. “Open the door and we can find out.”

Julian’s smirked wolfishly.

And then he opened the door.


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