“IGNORE THEM, REINA.” Lucy rubs the side of my arm as if that will make the goosebumps go away.
Everyone in the cafeteria is staring at us. Or rather, they’re staring at me. Since that incident two days ago, I’ve been called every name possible.
People are starting to take pictures of my every move and sending them to that shady Instagram account.
I hate that I subconsciously search all around me as if expecting someone to jump at me.
It’s like everyone waited for this moment to roast me. Even those who remain silent are secretly appreciating my fall from grace.
“Let’s sit with the football team?” Lucy prompts with a beaming smile.
At the far end of the cafeteria, the football team and some of the cheerleading squad sit together—Bree included.
Of course, Asher is with his jerk friends.
Everyone laughs and plays around. Not him. His entire attention is on me as if he’s been watching me since I walked in.
It’s a thing he does, watching me without being obvious, like I’m the center of his focus. The pent-up energy hangs between us like a threat, irrational and unchained.
It’s stupid, isn’t it? I’m not supposed to feel a connection with an asshole who’s out to ruin my life.
I’m not supposed to watch him watch me at breakfast with Izzy or when he’s working out in the backyard.
I’m not supposed to stay up late just to see him return and stand by his car for a second too long, staring up at my window as if searching for something.
Or someone.
Now, our gazes clash and collide. Mine is defiant and unbending, his is challenging and quiet.
I can’t help the shivers bursting down my spine or the heat invading the tiniest pores of my skin.
Staring at Asher is beyond gazes and eyes. It’s a war with weapons, blood, and casualties. It’s impossible to predict who’ll lose and who’ll win.
One thing’s for certain: I’ll never raise the white flag.
I’ll pick my battles instead.
Breaking eye contact, I make a beeline toward a back table where the rest of the cheerleaders sit. ‘The less popular ones,’ as Bree so eloquently put it.
I smile when joy breaks out on the girls’ faces. I hate that the others put them down and that I never cared to see happiness on their faces before.
Lucy slides in beside me, shaking her head. “You do know you can’t avoid the main table forever, right?”
“I’m not avoiding it. I just don’t want to sit with them.” I take a bite of my pizza and chew slowly.
Screw salads. So what if I don’t get thrown in the air anymore? It’s not like I’ve been dying to return to that ‘epic’ position.
“Are you coming back to the captain position?” Cindy, a sophomore, asks with a timid voice.
“I don’t know.” And I really don’t. Cheerleading isn’t my goal in life. True, I’m still not sure what my actual goal is, but cheerleading is definitely not it.
Besides, this is senior year. They’ll have to elect a new captain soon. Doing it at the beginning or the end of the year shouldn’t make a difference.
My gaze strays to the ‘main’ table. Bree sits on Asher’s right, running her red-manicured fingers along his bicep…his strong, veiny bicep. She giggles at something he says like some silly teenager with a crush.
He’s eating while throwing glances her way.
Something boils in my bloodstream, turning it all hot and green.
How can Bree, who claims I’m her best friend, flirt with my fiancé right in front of me?
Not that I want to sit next to Asher. Ever.
But still, I don’t like people stepping all over me, especially fake friends like Bree.
“At this rate, there will be a division in the squad.” There’s a sadness in Lucy’s voice as she plays with a fork on her salad plate.
“Correction.” Naomi slams her plate down and sits across from me. She usually doesn’t even eat in the cafeteria. “Lucy is too nice to tell you there’s already a division in the squad.” Naomi points at the cheerleaders, the boys and girls sitting with Bree. “Bitch Uno’s Team.” She motions at our table. “Bitch Dos’ Team.”
The girls gasp, but Naomi isn’t done. She takes a bite of her pizza and speaks casually. “I wonder who will win. Actually, scratch that—you’re losing by forfeiting.”
“Stop it, Nao,” Lucy scolds.
“Nah, your captain seems to have buried her head in the sand like Little Miss Ostrich, so it’s time for a wake-up call.” Naomi throws her hands around. “Bree has been all over Asher like a snake and you’re letting her. She’s taking over the squad and you’re letting her. She’s snatching your position at this college and—OMG, shocker—you’re letting her. Hashtag fall of a queen.”
I suck in a long breath. “Have you ever thought maybe I don’t want to be on those pedestals anymore?”
Naomi laughs. “Could’ve fooled me.”
“I’m not joking, and I don’t have to prove myself to you or to anyone else.” I put down my pizza. “I’m done being the old Reina. I won’t go out of my way to be someone I’m not.”
Silence falls over the table as if I’ve spoken holy words.
“So…what?” Naomi narrows her eyes. “You fell once and now you’re abdicating the throne?”
I smile. “I don’t remember having any throne to abdicate. I lost my memories.”
“But we didn’t. None of us did.” The maliciousness in Naomi’s voice takes me by surprise.
“Nao…” Lucy trails off.
“No.” She shakes her head. “Memories on or off, you’re still a selfish bitch, Reina.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” My tone hardens.
“You’re leaving it all to Bree knowing exactly the type of freak she is. All you care about is getting yourself out of the spotlight.”
“Why do you care? Don’t you hate me?”
“I do, but the other girls look up to you for some reason. The least you can do is protect them from Bree’s fat-shaming remarks and dictatorship. Did you know she makes the less pretty ones go on insane diets and do individual workouts until they almost pass out from hunger and exhaustion? Did you know she’s having them do the male cheerleaders’ work? Of course you don’t. As I said, you only care about yourself.”
“Is that true?” I ask the girls.
Lucy winces before she and a few other girls bow their heads with pained expressions.
Oh.
I bite my lower lip so hard I’m surprised blood doesn’t come out. So this is what the others have been going through while I was hiding in my room and skipping watching them at practice.
While I was too engrossed in myself, the girls have been at Bree’s mercy—or lack thereof.
Old Reina might not have done much for these girls before, but that will change now.
I won’t sit back and watch as they’re being mistreated.
Straightening my spine, I meet Naomi’s gaze. “I’ll step up under one condition.”
She gives me a quizzical glance but says nothing.
“You need to forgive me, Naomi.”
Soft gasps echo from the girls as they watch us closely.
Her lips purse. “Why is that important?”
“It is to me.” My voice softens. “Don’t you want to protect the girls?”
“Why would you think I want to do that?” She maintains her signature glare, but I know she cares deep down or she wouldn’t have asked me to help them.
“Come on,” Lucy pleads.
“I need allies,” I coax.
“You must be out of your mind if you think you’ll have that in me.” Naomi flicks her silky black hair back. “I’m your enemy, Reina.”
“Well, you know what they say about keeping your enemies closer than your friends.”
“You’ve become such a freaking weirdo.” She rises to her feet. “So, are we doing this or what?”
I smile as I stand up with both Lucy and Naomi on either side of me. The rest of the girls and some boys follow suit, one by one.
“Let’s go get my place back,” I say with all my confidence.
Naomi leans in to whisper, “I’ll gut you if you return to your old bitchy self.”
I smirk. “Is that a promise?”
She shakes her head. “That blunt-force trauma really did a number on you.”
We stride toward the main table. Everyone in the cafeteria watches us closely, seeming to hold their breath.
Silence fills the space as everyone at the main table stops talking all at once.
I stand there, carrying my plate, straightening my shoulders.
Prescott offers an awkward smile. “Hey, Captain.”
Bree reprimands him with a look and presses her lips into a thin line.
Owen jumps up from his seat and grins at us. “Long time no see, Rei-Rei. Are you here for that offer?”
“I’m here for my place.” I meet Bree’s stare head-on. She has enough decency to stop rubbing her hand along Asher’s arm, but she doesn’t let him go.
I refuse to look him in the eye even though I feel him boring holes in my face. One look, one freaking glance and all the courage I’ve summoned might evaporate.
“Oh, what to do?” Bree asks with a honeyed voice. “The table doesn’t fit everyone.”
I lean over, plant my hand in front of her, and mimic her fake smile. “Then I guess you have to make room for the captain.”
Everyone at the table—and the entire cafeteria—grows silent, seemingly entranced by the duel.
This will either bury her or bury me.
And I haven’t returned from the dead to be buried.
“It’s okay!” Lucy rushes in. “I’m sure we can attach an extra table.”
“Hear that, Bree?” I tell her. “Go fetch the table.”
She doesn’t move, her face growing red with exertion. “Reina, you—”
I slam my tray in front of hers, shutting her up. I lean forward and snarl, “Move.”
Her mouth falls open, but no words come out. Her ears heat, looking close to combustion. It’s Prescott who grabs her by the arm.
I remove her hand from Asher’s arm and plant my ass right beside him.
“Right, ladies.” Owen chuckles. “We’ll help with the table.”
A few other guys from the team laugh along with him and go to fetch one. Naomi smiles in my peripheral vision, and I can’t help but smile back.
No one will step on me.
So what if I was a terrible person in the past? I’m changing, and no one will make me feel bad about that.
A heavy arm slings over my shoulder. I breathe in his sandalwood and citrus scent as I focus on his touch surrounding me.
Asher’s hot breath tickles my ear. “What are you doing?”
I swallow, squashing the flutters in my chest and the tightening of my belly. The flaw in this plan? Having to be this close to Asher.
It’s becoming harder and harder to control my reaction around him. A part of me sees him as the one who breathes life into me, the one who saved me twice.
And it’s a wrong thought to have about someone who means me no good.
“It has nothing to do with you,” I murmur back.
Down, body. Stay the hell down.
His lips graze the shell of my ear. A whimper gets trapped in my throat as he bites down for a split second.
“Is that so?” The rumble of his voice awakens goosebumps on my skin.
How can he pack so much sexual energy in three mere words?
My body catches fire from his lips and voice on my ear. I squirm in my seat, fighting to not make a sound or lean into his touch.
“What if I want it to be about me?” His voice deepens with darkness so tangible I taste it on my tongue.
My head snaps in his direction. He watches me closely, but it’s not intimidation. It’s almost like…he’s seeing me in a different light.
A new light.
A brighter light.
“Didn’t you…” My voice catches and I clear my throat. “Didn’t you say you don’t want anything to do with me?”
“You keep barging in anyway.” He licks the shell of my ear one more time. “It’s time I trap you.”
