Three months later…
“Stop getting up,” Sage barked as she fussed over me. “Just lie around like the giant pregnant lady you are and let me do stuff!”
I chuckled. My belly was the size of the moon and my ankles were slightly swollen.
Sage pulled my feet up to prop them onto the bassinet we’d weaved to prepare for the baby, and then she went back to skinning the rabbit she’d caught for dinner. She was such a huge help these past three months, I’m not sure I would have made it without her.
“I’m pregnant, not useless,” I told her with a grin. That was partially a lie, I was so pregnant I was basically useless, but I felt stir crazy. Sage had forced me into bedrest two weeks ago when my ankles got swollen so bad that we could see my thumb indent when I pressed on them.
Sage pointed her deadly hunting blade at me and narrowed her eyes. “Don’t mess with me, woman. I have a knife.”
My grin grew wider. Sage and I had made a pact last night. We were going to give up looking for the cave for the next three months. It was so disheartening to climb all the way up there week after week and have the same results. We were defeated, and so fucking over it.
It was time to just prepare for this baby. It was time to look forward to something. We also made a pact to stop talking about the past as well. It was too painful. It had been nine months. Sawyer was either dead, captured, or underground. Willow had given birth already and her baby would be human. The Ithaki probably invaded Paladin Village and killed Astra…
I’d failed them all.
It was better for my mental health if I just didn’t think about it, so I shoved it into a deep, dark box in my psyche and didn’t go there.
The bear and elk and other psychotic animals only seemed to attempt attacking Sage when I wasn’t around, so we went everywhere together, which was fine by me. The curse was real. I’d seen enough over the past three months to believe that.
Sage held up the perfect white fluffy rabbit skin pelt and grinned. “I think we have enough for the winter baby blanket.”
I nodded. “Definitely. We can stitch it up today.”
We’d prepared for the birth as best we could for two women who knew jack shit about having babies. The biggest issue was the placenta. I knew you had to clamp the cord before you cut it or you’d risk losing all of the baby’s blood. We gathered all the knowledge we had about labor from every movie I’d seen, or stories she’d heard of, and we decided that the scene from Wanderlust where the hippie chick carries the placenta around in a bowl next to her baby until it naturally falls off was safest.
I was young and healthy. We had no reason to believe giving birth would have any serious complications. “Back in the Renaissance times, fourteen-year-olds popped out a baby a year and had no idea what they were doing,” Sage had told me.
I had no idea if it was true, but it made me feel better.
The swollen feet were likely because I did a lot of hiking and housework, more than a normal pregnant lady who lived in the city. Even with Sage’s help, there was so much work to do.
But everything was going to be fine. I truly felt that in my bones.
“Your boobs are getting gigantic. Sawyer would be sad to miss this,” Sage said, and then her face fell when she realized she’d spoken of the past. “Sorry.”
I gave her a light smile, trying to pretend I wasn’t fazed by the comment. “Yeah.”
Sage and I had endless conversations about what the note I’d plastered to the wall meant.
I found it! It’s right off the well-worn path. Plain as day once you trust.
We’d decided that he meant to finish it, trust … and never did, or it had been erased. No one would be that cruel, right?
“Trust what?” I would scream on a daily basis. But not today. Today, we had decided to not talk about or go looking for the cave. Today, we were a mom to be and auntie to be excited about a baby.
For the next three months, I was just going to focus on being a mom with my best friend, and worry about everything else after that.
“If you want to name her after me, I won’t care. I mean, I am going to be the best aunt ever.” Sage plopped the rabbit meat into the pot.
I chuckled. “Yeah, that won’t be confusing at all, calling both of you Sag—” I gasped, clutching my belly as it tightened and went rock hard.
Sage froze. “Braxton Hicks?”
The pain was intense, so intense that I couldn’t speak for a moment.
“Maybe?” I said, breaking out in a sweat. I’d been getting a lot of these false labor belly tightening things over the past month, but that one was … different.
She stood, rushing around the cabin and into the adjoining nursery room I’d created. “We are going to pretend labor has started anyway, okay? I don’t want your water breaking on the mattress pad.”
She was right. We’d talked about the birthing plan, and we both agreed we should try to keep the beds from irreversible damage, as there was no replacing them.
“Okay, but I think it’s another false alarm.” I’d had a lot of those this week.
Moving to stand and make my way into the adjoining room that Sage had prepared as a birthing room, I was racked with another painful contraction mid-stride.
Okay … this was more than the fake contractions I’d been having all week. I rush-waddled into the room to find Sage laying out the deer skin suede on top of the clay bricks I’d fired. I’d finally mastered the art of firing clay in a deep hole inside the earth. I just dug a hole, put the pots or bricks inside that I had shaped from the natural clay mud, and then shoved a bunch of twigs and dried grasses in there and lit them.
It worked! This was a game changer. Sage even made the baby a little clay rattle with stones inside; it was adorable.
“I think it might be the real thing,” I told her just as wetness trickled down my legs. I froze, looking down at the clear fluid dripping to the floor.
Looking up, I met Sage’s panicked gaze. “Okay, it’s go time! I’m gonna boil water and wash my hands.”
Holy crap.
Okay … it was time. After all these months of preparing, I was about to have a baby out in the woods with no pain meds.
“Remember all those movies you told me about that had the women on their hands and knees?” Sage asked.
I nodded, slipping free of my giant loose dress and sitting naked and cross-legged on the floor. Sage and I had seen each other naked a hundred times; this was going to be no big deal.
“I think you should try that, on all fours, and then sitting or rocking might help the baby come out?”
Being on my back with all this belly weight pressing down on me was hard anyway, so that was a good idea.
“Maybe I should shower,” I called out into the house as Sage had disappeared. “What if there is bacteria on my legs and it gets on the baby?”
“Okay, I’ll boil extra water, but I’ll need to go to the artesian spring tomorrow to get more, because I don’t want to leave you right now,” she called back.
And she couldn’t go to the spring alone, or a tree, or elk, or whatever, would try to kill her. But I didn’t say that.
“Okaaaaahhhhh…” A contraction hit me mid-sentence and a growl ripped from my throat.
Motherfucker, this hurt way worse than I thought it would. How had this happened so fast? Didn’t women labor for like hours? I mean, I was having that rock hard belly and cramping all day, but that hadn’t been labor, right?
“I feel like I have to poop!” I yelled, and Sage rushed into the room wide-eyed.
Her hands were scrubbed clean and dripping wet. “Are you sure, or are you going to go poop outside and a baby is going to pop out?”
My eyes widened at the thought.
“Oh God, don’t scare meeeahhhh!” Another contraction hit me and the urge to poop or push consumed me.
“Screw the shower, Sage, I think the baby is coming,” I said through gritted teeth.
Sage ran forward as I popped onto all fours and she positioned herself behind me like she was going to catch a football. “Ohmygod, I see some brown baby head hair!” Sage screamed.
Shock ripped through me at that. “How is this happening so fast?” I asked, before another contraction hit. When I yelled, Sage told me to push.
I did, and my entire vagina felt like it split open. Red hot pain sliced between my legs so fast I felt like I was going to pass out.
“Shifter births are quicker, I think. My mom said something about it, but I never listened,” was all Sage offered. “She’s stuck halfway, Demi, I can see the tip of her ear. I need one more push and I can pull her out.”
The pain was unbearable, so much so that my legs shook and I wanted to pass out. I burst into sobs. This was too hard. It hurt too much and I wanted Sawyer here. I wanted my mom, I wanted a fucking epidural.
“I can’t,” I whimpered. “It hurts.”
“Demi Calloway-Hudson, you are the strongest woman I know. You can absolutely do this!” Sage yelled.
My belly seized up again as the pain of another contraction hit me, and I held my breath, pushing with everything I had.
I pushed so hard I was sure I was going to push out my organs! There was a searing pain, like someone had lit my vagina on fire, and then a giant relief. I collapsed to the ground, trembling as the throbbing between my legs lessened.
“It’s a … boy,” Sage said beside me, and then burst into tears. “A beautiful boy, Demi. You did it!”
I rolled onto my back as I burst into sobs. My eyes searched the space until they landed on Sage and the naked flailing baby in her arms.
He let loose with a big cry, and Sage and I both erupted into relieved laughing.
I did it!
Reaching out, she lay him on my bare chest, and I peered down into his deep blue eyes. Seeing those eyes, his tiny perfect button nose, and thick mop of dark brown hair, it formed a sob in my throat. He looked just like his dad. I’d stopped reliving the memories of Sawyer in my head the past few months; they were too painful. Sawyer the day I met him at Delphi, Sawyer when he proposed, Sawyer kissing me. Now all of those memories came rushing back and my unbridled joy was mixed with a deep yearning for this baby to know his father, for Sawyer to see what perfect creature we’d created.
“Oh my God, he’s a mini Sawyer.” Sage knelt on the ground with me and looked down at him. “Crap, we didn’t brainstorm boy names!”
I chuckled, looking into those deep blue eyes as he searched mine curiously. “Creek Curt Calloway-Hudson.”
Tears ran down my face in thin rivulets as baby Creek started to make an “O” with his mouth, before finding my nipple.
“I think that’s a perfect name.” Sage’s voice was thick with emotion. “Also, I never thought I would say this, but I’m going to get the placenta bowl.”
I burst into laughter, and Sage did too. I was so glad she was here. What a gift loyal and true friends were.
I grinned, looking down at my perfect baby boy. “Your Auntie Sage is a little crazy but you’re going to love her.”
I placed a kiss on his soft head and he clamped a hand around my finger. My heart throbbed in that moment, because Sawyer should be here. This was so beautiful, I couldn’t imagine raising this child without my mate.
“We’re going to find Daddy, okay? Don’t worry,” I told Creek, and then the exhaustion pulled at my limbs and I lay my head back to rest.
