I kind of liked how protective Archer was being of me, even if he impeded on things I didn’t like. I didn’t enjoy people assuming they could make decisions for me or tell me what to do. I didn’t like how he insinuated that he knew how I felt in all of this. The last thing I needed was to be cooped up and doing nothing with my life. No, if there was a chance that I could help in bringing the motherfuckers down, then I wanted to be part of it.
Whether or not Archer was on board with the plan.
“All right,” he said as we made our way onto a grassy knoll beside the clubhouse, “the first thing I want to know is how much you understand about defense.”
I nodded slowly. “You mean, like defending myself against an attacker.”
His face fell. “Yeah. That.”
I shrugged. “I could show you what I know. But it’s probably all beginner stuff.”
He put up his fists. “Fine by me. Show me what you’ve got and we’ll go from there.”
“You sure about this?”
He nodded. “Perfectly sure. See if you can take me down.”
Let’s see how your ego does with this.
Archer was pompous, and while I thought that was incredibly attractive in a man, I got off on bringing them down a peg or two. I put up my fists and slowly approached him, painfully aware of the fact that people stared out windows to watch us. I lunged at him a bit, trying to gauge his sensitivity to movement, but he didn’t once flinch.
“Come on,” he said with a grin, “I can take it.”
I clicked my tongue. “Suit yourself.”
And as I rushed him, letting loose an ear-piercing screech, I cocked my leg back as his arms soared through the air.
Before kicking him between his legs.
“Holy—fuck,” he choked out.
He fell to his knees as I dusted off my hands. “I know that move.”
He wheezed for air. “The fuck—is wrong—with you?”
I grinned. “Don’t ever underestimate me again or assume that you can make decisions on my behalf. Got it?”
He slowly looked up at me with tears in his eyes. “You wanna know what’s terrible about this position?”
My eyes widened. “Don’t you dare.”
He shook his head, his voice slowly clearing. “They won’t have mercy on you, and neither will I after a move like that. Come here.”
“No!”
He scrambled for my legs as I tried stepping back, but the pain of my bruises slowed me down. He wrapped his hands around my ankles and took me to the grass, quickly climbing on top of me. He pinned my wrists down and I flailed my legs, trying my hardest to get out of the hold.
And as I panicked, Archer’s lips pressed against my ear as he bent over. “It’s just me. I need you to breathe. You’ll have to learn to breathe through the panic.”
I drew in short breaths through my nose. “Get off. I need you off.”
“They won’t get off, Josie. Understand that.”
I bucked against him. “Get off!”
He quickly scrambled off me and offered me his hand, but I knocked it away. I leapt to my feet and charged him, slamming my shoulder against his stomach. I tried to pick him up over my shoulder, but my body hurt too much, and he was way too big. However, that gave him enough wiggle room to wrap his arms around me, flip me upside down with my legs over his shoulder, and he lifted me into the air as if he were about to drop me.
“No!” I shrieked.
He paused before he flipped me back over and settled me onto my feet. “Get the picture now?”
My hands trembled as I nodded my head, but I didn’t dare say anything. I peered over my shoulder at him and saw the sorrow behind his eyes. He hated this. He hated every second of it, and I made him do it out of sheer stubbornness.
“I get it,” I murmured, “they won’t go easy on me.”
Archer shook his head. “They won’t just ‘not go easy’ on you, Josie. They’ll kill you, and rape you before they do it. These men are ruthless. You need to understand what you’re up against. Those moves that you might have learned in a class somewhere? They won’t cut it with these men. And you can rest assured that if you yell ‘stop,’ they’ll only get off on it.”
I swallowed down my fears. “Got it.”
He drew in a deep breath. “Now, would you rather take the gun route? It’ll be easy to send you in there packing heat so you can defend yourself. There are plenty of creative places we use to bypass bodyguards.”
She shook her head. “Our bodyguards don’t check us. They let us have small firearms to defend ourselves.”
He walked up to me and placed his hand on my shoulder. “They’ll change that, too. Men like this want women completely powerless. But we can still sneak it in there with you if you want to take that route. And I really think you should.”
I relented and nodded my head. “Sure, sounds like a plan.”
He patted my shoulder. “I’ll be right back. You know, once I get some ice for my fucking balls.”
I giggled. “Too bad someone won’t kiss them and make them better, right?”
The second the words flew out of my mouth, Archer stilled his movements. His eyes turned dark as he looked down at me and something raced throughout my entire body. Goosebumps fleed up and down my arms. A heat so intense that it curled my toes percolated through my veins. And as Archer’s hand slid from my shoulder, he let it trail down my back as he walked toward the clubhouse.
“Give me ten minutes,” he said.
I closed my eyes and drew in a sobering breath as the ocean waves kicked up a breeze that soothed away the heat Archer created within me. I cleared my throat and cracked my neck, wincing with the pain that rushed throughout my body. Holy hell, this guy had really done a number on me. I felt like absolute shit.
Yes, a gun is definitely the way to go.
“All right,” Archer said as he returned, “have you ever shot a firearm before?”
I shrugged. “Just as a kid. It was more of a B.B. gun, though.”
“Hey, at least you have a starting point. Here, take this. It’s a—”
I took the gun from him. “—Smith and Wesson Shield EZ. A lot of women like it because it’s got a low recoil and it’s easier on the wrists to fire.”
I cocked the gun and held it out in front of me, aiming down the sights. I was taught growing up to keep both eyes open and aim for the target that didn’t look like a hologram. But as Archer’s hand slowly slid up my shoulder and down my arm, I watched him come into view.
Before he walked out in front of me about twenty feet and placed a human-shaped target for me to use.
“Just pop off one shot for me. I want to see how you do,” he said.
I nodded and aimed for the nose and pulled the trigger, but the bullet sank just to the bottom of the target’s right cheek.
“What were you aiming for?” Archer asked.
I groaned as I lowered my weapon. “His nose.”
He jogged back over to me. “Not bad for someone who only has experience with a B.B. gun.”
I shrugged. “I might go to a gun range every now and again.”
He quirked an eyebrow. “How much is ‘every now and again?’”
I peeked up at him. “Once every couple of months? Maybe? If it’s busy at work, then I don’t get to go sometimes. But I try to, at least.”
He grinned. “Do you have a gun of your own that you’d rather use?”
I shook my head. “Never had the balls to pull the trigger and get one, so to speak.”
He chuckled. “It’s a big deal, buying a gun here in California. But you’ll be just fine with this one. How did the recoil feel on your wrists?”
“Pretty good. Didn’t hurt at all, though I did notice it.”
“And the weight?”
“That’s the best thing about it. It’s lightweight in my hands. It’ll be easy on my shoulders.”
He ejected the magazine. “I take it you know how to do all of this stuff, then?”
I nodded. “I can load it, shove it in, cock it, and even disassemble it. With some time, of course. I’m not like, one of those speed demons with it.”
He smiled as he shoved the magazine back into the gun and cocked it. “Okay, this time I want you to aim for the head but place your gun a bit higher than you’d expect.”
“So, aim just over his head?”
“More like at the top of his scalp. Try that, and let’s see what happens.”
Thank fuck this thing’s facing the ocean. “All right, I’ll give it a shot.”
And when I did just that, I nailed that fucking target right in the head.
“Hell yeah!” I exclaimed.
Archer clapped his hands. “Now, use that same technique, but for the heart. Aim, let’s say, around the lower collarbone area. Let’s see where it lands.”
And damn it, I was right on target with a chest shot using Archer’s technique.
“We got ourselves a natural over here!” he exclaimed.
I felt powerful as I stood there with that gun in my hand. As he walked back over to my side, I raised my gun and took out both of the targets kneecaps as well. There were a few times where Archer repositioned my body, but I didn’t mind.
Especially since his hands were so warm.
“All right, I’d like to do one last test with you,” he murmured in my ear.
I shivered as I turned around. “What’s that?”
His eyes danced along my face. “I want to trade out the gun you have for a dummy gun, and I want to blindfold you and attack you.”
I blinked. “Sorry, what?”
He placed his hands on my shoulders. “Sometimes, you’ll never see these attacks coming. Not until you’re on the floor. And I want to make sure you can get to your gun, depending on where we hide it.”
I swallowed hard. “And you want to blindfold me?”
“Yes. If you’re okay with that. How does that make you feel?”
I didn’t like the tears brewing behind my eyes. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. I don’t mind that one bit.”
“Josie, be honest with me.”
My palms started to sweat. “Just go get the shit you need for this, okay?”
“Josie, look me in the eye and tell me it’s okay.”
But I couldn’t.
The mere idea of being blindfolded and tackled to the ground dredged up memories I never wanted to speak about. Ever. My hands trembled and I couldn’t catch my breath. The world faded in and out and I bent forward to try and root myself. Archer moved behind me and threaded his arms around my body.
Causing me to tense as his lips fell to the shell of my ear. “Stand up, hands to the sky. Come on. You can do it.”
A tear streaked my cheek as I reached up for the sky. “I’m okay. I can do this. I’m just fine, I swear.”
His hands slowly ran up my arms, as if he were stretching with me. “It’s okay to not be okay, Josie. You need to understand that first.”
My lower lip quivered. “Totally okay. Yeah, I’m okay. I swear.”
My tears gave me away, though. The trembling of my body gave me away, too. And when I collapsed into a pile of tears, Archer was there to catch me. He sank to the ground with me and held me tightly, the gun at our side as I crawled into his lap. I sobbed against his chest, my face adding to the pain I already felt deep within my soul. Then, Archer spoke a truth I’d have to deal with sooner rather than later.
And later was just fine with me.
“You’re not a weak woman. I need you to understand that I know that, okay?” he asked softly.
I sniffled. “Oh—okay.”
He sighed against my hair. “But everyone has pain deep down. Everyone has pain that isn’t simply topical. And it’s when that deep-down pain goes unaddressed is when it starts to get bad. Just know that, at some point in time, you’ll have to acknowledge it in order for it to go away. Okay?”
I drew in a broken breath. “Oh-oh-okuh—okay.”
And as he ran his fingers through my hair, I cried against his chest. I cried for my body, for my parents, for the childhood I’d never have. I cried for Astrid, and the life she had been thrust into. Hell, I even cried for myself and what I was about to get myself into as well.
Then, I simply cried.
