“Ayvah,” I shout into the trees.
It’s so dark out here tonight, even with the moonlight and the torch one of my men handed me, I can barely see a few steps ahead of me. I hate the idea that she’s out here on her own, and worse than that, she’s out here because of me. Because of what I did to her.
I don’t know how much time has passed since I sprinted out the back door in search of my woman, but the more time I spend in the cool night air, the more panicked I become. She’s going to send me gray before my time if I’m not careful.
The sound of crunching stops me dead in my tracks. There’s another set of footsteps out here that aren’t mine, which means I’m getting close.
“Ayvah,” I yell into the darkness. “Just stop for a minute so we can talk. It’s cold out here and I don’t want you to catch a cold or hurt yourself.”
Silence greets me and a growl claws its way up my throat. I’m not angry at her, I’m not even confused about why she’s done this, I’m just worried.
I continue through the trees, shining the torch left and right, but only ever seeing my own men searching a few yards away. Fear prickles at the back of my neck, what if she found a way out? Or worse, what if Annalise found a way in. It’s doubtful given the upgrades Everett made after our head of security turned out to be working for our enemy, but not entirely impossible.
Up until a few months ago, I thought our security teams and systems were top notch. We’d never had a breach, never had anyone betray us, and then all within the space of three months, Emerson was kidnapped, the estate was infiltrated and Wynter and I were held captive, and Snow and Wynter were run off the road and almost burned alive in a church. Now I don’t trust the people who work for us, or the systems Everett assures me are fool proof. How can I?
A scream echoes off the trees and I stop dead, looking into the night to try to ascertain which direction the sound came from. She could be hurt. Someone could be hurting her. But I don’t want to run in the wrong direction and have her alone and hurt for longer than necessary.
“Came from this way, boss,” James shouts from my left. He’s one of the only men we employ that I still trust with the safety of my family, and only because we’ve helped him a lot over the years to find the siblings who were separated after his parents died when he was young. His sister especially had been through a lot and we made sure she had the very best help the city had to offer.
I take off in a dead sprint in the direction he points, not stopping until the wall at the edge of the property comes into view. What was she thinking trying to escape in the middle of the night? What was her plan once she was outside the gates? I can’t allow myself to dwell on it because the more time I spend considering all the things she could have had planned, the more the beast inside tries to push his way out. But I can’t allow myself to show him again, not after what happened this afternoon. I have to push him down so far that he can never rear his ugly head around Ayvah.
The moment my eyes settle on a body on the ground, my stomach sinks.
I skid to a stop beside her and fall to my knees, immediately rolling her to her back. I shouldn’t move her, what if she hit her head? What if she hurt her neck or back when she fell?
“Call Doc,” I yell at whoever is nearby. I can’t drag my eyes away from Ayvah for even a second to check. I brush her hair from her cheeks, the dark brown locks covered in fine dirt. My poor girl. This never would have happened if I didn’t hurt her.
“Don’t jostle her around too much,” James says as he kneels down beside me.
“I know,” I snap.
His eyes widen but he doesn’t bother saying a word as he hands me his jacket.
I thank him quickly and place it over her too still body. She’s breathing and that’s all I can be thankful for right now, but I can’t leave her out here. I have to get her inside.
As carefully as I can manage, I lift her into my arms, making sure to keep her neck and back as stable as I can before I start a steady pace toward the house. Each step is careful and calculated, not wanting to make her injuries any worse than they already are.
I should take her back to her room, but I can’t. I need her in my space. I need to know she’s safe and the only place I’m sure of her safety is by my side. She doesn’t see it yet, but soon she will. Soon she’ll understand there isn’t a thing on this earth I wouldn’t do to keep her safe, including hiding the monster inside away from her so she never has to be subjected to his brutality.
I shove my bedroom door open and carry her straight to the bed, carefully laying her on top of the covers. I drag the chair from beneath the window until it’s beside the bed, take a seat and pick up her hand, bringing her delicate fingers to my lips and pressing a gentle kiss to her knuckles. “You’re safe now, baby girl,” I murmur quietly.
I’ve made a lot of fatal mistakes since the moment she walked into my life, but none more than tonight. Every single one of my men has seen the extent of my affection for Ayvah, which is dangerous when you’re in a position of power like I am. If I were able to think clearly when she’s around, perhaps I would have made myself seem cold and aloof toward her when my men are around, but that’s not an option. The only way I can treat her is like she’s the most precious thing in the world to me, because that’s exactly what she is.
“I won’t let anyone, or anything, hurt you. Including me,” I promise. She may not be able to hear me, but I’ll know I swore it to her, and I’ve always been a man of my word.
I’m not sure how long I sit with my elbows resting on the mattress and her hand pressed against my lips, but when she groans, it startles me. Not because I wasn’t expecting her to wake up, because I was, but because I don’t want her to hurt herself. I was hoping Doc would be here before she woke so he could stabilize her neck, but that asshole is always late.
“Ayvah,” I say quietly, standing from my seat to give me better access if I need to hold her still. “I need you to stay really still for me, okay?”
“What?” she groans, her head falling to the side despite my attempt to catch it.
“You fell in the woods behind the estate. Doc is on his way but I don’t want you to do any further damage.”
“Where am I?”
“In my room.”
Her eyes shoot open and fear crosses her chocolate brown eyes. I never want to see that in her gaze, especially not because she’s scared of me. But she doesn’t move. She just stares at me for long moments, assessing if I’m as angry as I was this afternoon. But she won’t find anger, not at her at least. She did what any rational person would do if they found themselves in the same position, and I can’t fault her for that.
Before I can say anything else, Doc strolls in, his face grim until the moment his eyes fall on Ayvah and a bright smile crosses his face that even manages to light up his usually cold eyes.
Maybe it’s time to start thinking about getting a new doctor.
