I don’t have an answer for her.
Hell, I don’t have any answers for myself.
Everything that’s happened since Candy told me there was a woman being drugged in a booth has been a blur of panic and possessiveness, and I don’t know how to tell Ayvah that without terrifying her. I can’t just come out and tell her the moment I locked eyes on her I knew she was meant to be mine. Or that my dead parents wrote me a letter that said the woman that would change my life would fall into my lap and be nothing like I expected. Or even that the idea of her being out of my sight makes the monster inside me cagey.
I can’t tell her any of that, and I don’t know what to tell her instead, so I turn to my door and shove it open, slamming it behind me with a little more force than is necessary. My body vibrates with anger and frustration. I’ve never felt as out of control as I have since I saw Ayvah looking so helpless. My need to protect her is irrational and no matter how hard I try to reason with myself that the feeling will pass, something tells me that’s not the case at all.
I make my way around my Lamborghini and open her door. It’s my favorite car for zipping around the city, but when I remembered I would have to drive her home in it I swear I almost broke out in hives. It’s not safe for her. To the point I almost called one of my men to bring me one of the SUVs Everett built just to make sure she was protected. Like I said, completely irrational.
Ayvah swings her legs out of the car, ready to walk herself to the door but before I realize I’m doing it, I lift her into my arms again, settling the beast inside. It seems anytime I’m not touching her I’m like a caged animal waiting for my next meal, but she gives me peace, something I can’t ever remember having.
“I can walk,” she hisses.
“I’m sure you can.” I smirk. I’ve never been one for feisty women, they’re too much work and I don’t have the time or patience for a bratty woman when I can have one that bends to my will at the click of my fingers. But that’s not the case with Ayvah. I crave her, sass and all, even if it makes my palm itch to spank her perfect plump ass.
“I mean it, Storm, put me down.” She shoves against my chest, but I hold my arms around her tightly, making sure she’s not going to fall.
“No. Now will you settle down. I know it’s been a hard night, and I’m going to get you set up so you can get some rest, but I need you to let me get you there.”
“I don’t need you to carry me, Storm. Can I please walk?”
“Still a no.” The door opens as I reach the top step and Rayne stands in the hallway, a smug smile tugging at his lips.
I glare at him, but there’s nothing I can say in front of Ayvah. I knew the moment he saw me with her he would know what’s happening, and by the way he watches me as I pass him heading toward the stairs, I know I was right.
The door closes behind us and footsteps follow me through the house and up the stairs toward the bedrooms. “Emerson set up the room next to yours for her,” Rayne calls from behind me and some of the tension in my shoulders releases. If I had to deal with Ayvah kicking and screaming while I try to make my first bed in twenty years for myself, I have a feeling I wouldn’t be able to restrain myself. As it is, I’m barely holding on.
The door is open when we reach it and I don’t miss the small gasp as her eyes wander around the room. We don’t have guests very often, especially since our parents were killed, but we try to keep all the rooms ready just in case. We have a lot of friends in high places, and if one of them drops by suddenly, we need to have somewhere for them to sleep.
“You’ll stay in here tonight,” I say as I sit her on the edge of the bed.
Ayvah’s eyes dart between me and the doorway where I assume my brother is standing. He’s wearing sleep pants and a t-shirt, but he still looks menacing as hell.
“Is Emerson in bed?” I ask over my shoulder.
“No, she’s doing some work seeing as she’s up anyway. The city has all these hoops she needs to jump through for the new center and she thought since she was up anyway, she may as well get some of it done.”
I nod. She’s been working so hard around all the family bullshit to get that place up and running, and each time I see her she looks more exhausted than the last. I find it kind of funny that my brother fell for a woman like her. They’re like light and dark. An angel and a demon. Complete opposites who found one another and never let go.
Rayne steps into the room and moves toward us slowly. “I’m Rayne, and my wife Emerson is around here somewhere if you want to talk.”
“Thank you,” Ayvah squeaks, her eyes darting around the room as if she’s looking for a way to escape. She’s going to be sorely disappointed if she thinks she’s going anywhere.
“Of course. She left something for you to sleep in on the chair over there.” He gives her a small smile before disappearing out the door, leaving us alone. If I thought Ayvah looked uncomfortable with his presence, it’s nothing compared to how she looks the moment we’re alone.
“You’re frightened.”
“Yes,” she whispers, looking anywhere but at me.
I sigh, moving to kneel in front of her. I’ve never kneeled for anyone and yet tonight I keep doing it over and over again for this stranger. “What would make you feel more at ease?”
Her deep brown eyes meet mine and knock the air from my lungs. There are so many emotions whirling around in them that I can’t focus on any one for longer than a moment. Fear. Lust. Confusion. And I long to take it all away. I want to give her space for quiet, especially after all she’s been through, but I don’t know how to do that. I’ve never pretended to understand women, even my sisters confuse the shit out of me, but I find myself wanting to understand Ayvah. “I don’t know.”
I nod before reaching behind me and pulling my gun from the back of my pants and handing it to her. Her hands shake under the weight, her eyes wide as she stares at it. “Have you ever held a gun before, baby girl?”
“No.” She pushes it toward me, as if holding it is burning her skin, but I close my hands around hers, forcing her to keep a hold of the weapon.
“Keep it. I’ll teach you how to use it, but I want you to have it so you feel safe enough tonight to get some sleep. There’s a lock on the door and I promise no one will come through it unless they’re invited.”
“I…. I can’t have this.” Her voice shakes. She doesn’t understand this world, and if I were a better man, I wouldn’t even consider dragging her into it. But I’ve never claimed to be a good man. I’m a man who takes what I want, when I want it, and right now there’s nothing I want more than Ayvah.
“Yes, you can. Now, I’m going to go out for a few hours, but if you need anything Rayne and Emerson are around. Anything you want, they can get it for you, but I want you to get some sleep. You’ve been through a lot tonight and Doc couldn’t pinpoint what they gave you so I want you to get some good sleep and we’ll figure out the rest in the morning.”
“It is the morning,” she points out.
A chuckle claws up my throat. I have a feeling she’s going to keep me on my toes. “Okay, this afternoon once you’ve had some sleep.”
She nods, prying her hands from mine and leaning over the place the gun on the bedside table. “You didn’t answer my question,” she whispers, and I don’t need her to remind me what question she’s referring to.
“I know.”
