Dear Yuki-Onna,
It has come to my attention that we’re toxic.
I know. This should’ve been evident for the three years we’ve known each other, but they say you never realize you’re in a toxic relationship until it ends.
Is that what this is all about? The ending?
I don’t like that. In fact, I hate it so much that I’m contemplating the best way to bring up the toxicity a notch just to keep you here.
So I came up with this idea. Or more like it hit me upside the head when I was gazing at the fucking boring sky the other day.
It was a moment of salvation, and, I swear, I could almost see the angels coming down from heaven and offering me their grace.
Just kidding. There were only demons and they were all sitting with me when I was hit by this thought.
Remember when I told you to never fall for me in my first letter? I said it’d just be tragic, but what I didn’t mention is that I will break your fucking heart.
I’ll break it so hard, there will be no pieces to pick up and no moving on with your life.
I will slash through your walls so deep, you won’t be able to get me out even if you tried.
I will toy with your feelings, to the point that you’ll wish you never had them in the first place.
I will conquer your life so thoroughly you will start to think about ending it.
Because that’s what toxicity does, my dear Yuki-Onna. It destroys and it does it so savagely, there will be nothing left of you or me.
But you went ahead and fell for me, didn’t you?
Even with my warnings, even with all the signs I sent your way, you had to defy logic and think of me as someone other than your faceless, nerdy pen pal from Japan.
You realize that’s your mistake, right? And it might as well be your downfall.
Because now that I know your weakness, me, I won’t stop until you’re begging at my feet. For what, I have no clue, but as long as there’s pleading and some crying, I’m sure I will be satisfied.
I can’t say the same about you.
Now, I don’t like imagining myself in other people’s shoes. But if I were you, I’d hide well.
Here’s the thing, though.
You’re into being chased and I might have developed the appetite for that type of twisted fuckery.
See? You’re also corrupting me, which is why we’re toxic for each other.
Go ahead and run, Naomi. Go ahead and hide.
If I were you, I would look under your bed and over your shoulder.
I would think twice about every shadow that passes in your peripheral vision.
I would live on your toes.
Because the moment you let your guard down will be the moment everything ends.
You will end, my ghostly Yuki-Onna.
Until that day comes, try to live well.
Believe me, you’ll need to savor every moment.
Toxic love,
Akira
