Heading straight for the shower, I stop short, finding a half-naked Luka in the middle of my room.
Biting my lip, my mind wanders as my eyes trail up his legs to the curve of his backside and up his broad back. But I stutter to a stop at what I see. Any heated thoughts completely leave me as my stomach drops.
There are large, jagged scars running in every direction across his back. Some are a familiar shape or imprint that I can make out, like the edge of a belt or whip. There is also the sharp cut of a blade trailing up the top of his back, with strange shapes hidden behind the long scars and woven into them.
Luka’s head whips around as if only noticing I’m here. He twists his body, hiding his back from me, and swallows hard.
“Sorry… Jax normally hogs the bathroom we share, so I slip down here sometimes. I thought I’d be in and out before you got here.”
“Luka…” I take a step closer but stop when his eyes drop to the floor.
“Who did that to you?”
Luka looks up, his eyes turning sad. “You caught them, huh?”
His sadness breaks my heart. I want to hunt down whoever did this to him and rip them apart.
“It was… a long time ago.” Luka sighs, shaking his head. “It’s not important.”
“Like hell it isn’t. Who did this? When…”
He looks at me for a minute before nodding his head.
“It was after you were… taken. Remember, I told you we kind of fell apart after that?”
I nod my head, taking a step closer. When he doesn’t step back, I take another and another until I’m beside him.
“Well, we all went our separate ways for a bit and ended up spending less and less time together and more and more time around our families.” He shakes his head, smiling. It was anything but humorous.
“You would think that was a good thing, but no… Our families are all just as fucked up as each other.”
My stomach twists. “Your family did this to you?”
“My uncle. It was no secret that Jax and I were the black sheep of the family. We’re shadow wolves, and to them, there’s nothing worse.”
I frown, not understanding. “But shadow wolves have been around for centuries. Why would they—”
“We were more powerful than them, even at that age. They saw us as a threat to their hierarchy. Even though Jax and I never wanted anything to do with it, they still didn’t care.”
“Luka…”
“My uncle is the Maven of our family. He has a lot of knowledge about supernatural species, and because of that, everyone listened to him when he told them he had a way to… fix us.”
“Fix? There’s nothing wrong with either of you,” I growl out. My blood boils for each one of his family members that made him think there was.
Luka grows quiet, as if lost in a memory—and not the good kind. I grip the end of my top, twisting it with my fingers, trying to stop myself from imagining all the things that he and Jax went through. My mind thinks up all the worst possibilities.
“What did he do, Luka?”
Luka grabs a fistful of his hair and pulls. “He tried to beat it out of us first, and when that didn’t work, he used other… methods.”
Bile rises up my throat at Luka’s words. I blink back the tears threatening to spill.
That man was supposed to be his family, and he hurt him. He hurt them both because they were different.
“Your back?”
“Will never heal, just like my wolf will never be fully part of me.”
“What do you mean?” I’ve seen him in his wolf form.
“When I first shifted, my wolf’s pelt was pure white, my flames this bright orange.” Luka smiles, but it’s not a happy smile. It’s a smile that tells of pain and loss, of memories no one should have to relive.
“My uncle used dark magic to split my shadow wolf from me.”
I open my mouth to speak, but no words form. The sick feeling in my stomach increases at Luka’s confession.
You’d have to be a monstrous person to try to split a shifter from their other half. One can’t exist without the other, and attempting to do something that horrific would end in both of their deaths. The thought sends an icy cold shiver down my back.
“I remember lying on that cold table, my hands and wrist held down by one of his friends. The pain felt like my body was being torn in two. I wasn’t going to last much longer. I remember thinking that even if I had to leave Jax, that at least I’d get to see you again.”
I grab his hand, squeezing it tight. He glances up, sees my face, and frowns. Reaching up with his other hand, he swipes a tear running down my face.
“He would’ve completed it too, if Jax hadn’t found us and shifted.”
“Luka…”
Luka shakes his head, looking down at our hands. “I’ll never be whole, Kiarra. Those tendrils of black shadows are not the same as your ability. It’s my shadow wolf. He’s not supposed to be like that, but we’re not… balanced. My uncle succeeded, at least partially. My wolf is a separate entity, one I can’t control. I push him away, and he fights me on every little thing. When those tendrils appear, it’s him trying to take over, and sometimes he wins.”
I swallow hard, trying to think of something I can do to help.
“Is there anything we can do? Maybe there’s someone who might know how to help?” A potion or a spell…
Luka shakes his head. “We’ve looked into it and tried everything we can, but it’s no use.”
Then maybe they were looking at it the wrong way.
“Have you ever tried talking to him… your wolf?” I ask.
He’s been fighting his wolf ever since they were nearly split, but I wonder if they’ve ever tried to exist alongside one another. If Luka is right and his wolf is a separate entity, then it might be possible for them to come together in another way. Just not the one Luka expects.
Luka swallows hard. “At the start… but he completely took over and ended up hurting someone. I didn’t try again after that.”
“You were only a kid, Luka. The both of you had been through something horrific. He was probably in as much pain as you and didn’t realize… Would you try again?”
“No.” Luka turns pale, glancing over at the bed.
“Why?”
“Because what if he hurts someone again—someone I care about—I would never forgive myself.” His eyes turn haunted as they look at me. “I don’t want to hurt you. The thought of it alone…”
Slowly, I raise my hands to his chest and feel his sharp intake of breath. “You would never hurt me.”
“Never,” Luka says vehemently, but his eyes are sad. “But he might.”
“Do you really believe that? He’s a part of you. Part of your soul.”
He releases a harsh sigh. “Maybe they’re right. Maybe my uncle—”
“No, Luka!” I place my hand on his cheek, hoping he’ll look at me. He leans into it, briefly closing his eyes before opening them on me.
“He’s wrong. They’re wrong for what they did to you, for how they made you feel. There’s not one thing wrong about you.”
“But—”
“No, buts. You’re perfect the way you are.”
He shakes his head. “I’m too broken to fix.”
“You are not broken.”
“I am.” He takes my hand from his face and holds it tight against his chest.
“Do you know how many times I’ve wanted to reach out and pull you to me? To sleep next to you, to feel your body against mine. But every time I have to stop myself, because I’m so fucking scared that he’ll do something I can never take back.”
“Luka…”
His heart beats fast under my fingers, and a tremble works its way through his body.
“I’m sorry, Kiarra. I can’t—”
I lean forward and press my lips to his, cutting off his doubts. I linger a moment before sliding my tongue along the seam of his lips. I’m about to pull back when I hear him moan, low and deep, sending warm shivers down my back.
Sliding his hand into my hair, he opens his mouth and deepens the kiss. Black tendrils appear, caressing my neck and sliding down my body. Heat unfurls in my lower stomach as his tongue strokes and sucks mine.
I reach up, gripping his shoulders when he pulls back. His eyes are wide with fear as they stare at the tendrils.
“No… He’ll—”
I lean in forward, placing a kiss to his chest, watching as his eyes flutter close. I drag my lips across it, feeling the rise and fall of his breaths beneath me.
“Kiarra…”
“Trust me,” I plead with him.
He opens his eyes, looking down at me. Swallowing hard, he nods, his whole body tense as I move around to his back.
I slowly trail my hands down his back, showing him that nothing about him could make me love him less. His scars were a part of him, and anything part of Luka was beautiful.
I feel him shudder beneath my touch. “Luka? Is this okay?”
“Yes.” Luka moans.
Leaning forward, I place my lips on the top of one of his scars, following its jagged line down his back. Dark tendrils slip out from his skin, beckoning me to touch them.
My finger brushes along them, making me shiver at their warmth.
“I don’t want to hurt you.” Luka swallows hard, the fear slashed across his face as he keeps his body still.
“You won’t,” I promise him.
“You don’t know that.”
“I do.” I trust Luka and the others with my life. And if he can’t trust his wolf—the other side of him—then I’ll do it for him.
I run my hands up his back and across his shoulders. More tendrils appear, reaching out to me, gently wrapping around my wrists.
Luka sees this, his eyes widening as he steps back from me.
“No.” He squeezes his eyes shut.
“Stop, Luka,” I beg him.
“He’ll hurt you.”
I shake my head, my heart breaking at seeing him doubt himself.
“I want you. I want all of you, Luka. Every side of you. You said you accept every part of me…”
Luka opens his eyes wide as they stare down at me. “I do, you know I do.”
“Then let me accept every part of you, too.”
His chest rises and falls with each rapid breath he takes. His face is drenched in his doubts and fears as he continues to hold himself back.
I stay where I am, waiting. This has to be his choice. I can’t make it for him, no matter how much I crave him… Crave his touch and his love. I will wait for however long he needs to heal, even if that takes forever.
Time drags on slowly, but I know it’s only been a couple of minutes. I open my mouth to try to change the subject, to move away from this for now, when a determined spark lights up his eyes and his tendrils disappear.
I see the moment he makes his decision. It’s like something snaps as he rushes forward and pulls me into him. His lips slam against mine, hungrily demanding I give him everything and more.
I push back, answering with each brush, each caress of my lips, telling him just how desperate and lost I am without them… without him. And just how much I’ll always need him.
Everything Luka kept hidden is in this kiss. His scent is full of dark desires, which swirl around his silent chaos, making my senses run wild.
I gasp as he nips my bottom lip, sending a bolt of lust straight to my core, now slick with heat.
He releases a throaty moan as I run my hands up his chest. I continue my trail up and over his shoulders before slowly dragging my fingertips down the length of his back.
“Kiarra,” he breathes.
His hands slide down my sides, stopping at the hem of my top. Dragging my lips from his, I reach down and pull it off, along with my bra, before slamming my lips back to his. He yanks me closer. The feel of his warm, bare skin against mine makes my body ache for more of him.
He moans as his hands slide up my sides to the curves of my breasts. I feel his body shudder as his thumb brushes the side of them.
I arch into his chest, my hardened nipples sliding against his skin, sending my heated body into overdrive. The more of his body I feel, the more I feel an all-consuming need to have him inside me, to feel his body pressed up against mine as we move as one.
“Towel,” I remind him.
Luka steps back, removing his towel. His long, thick erection springs free, making my mouth water.
“Your turn. Jeans.” He smirks at me.
His smile drops the minute I slide out of my jeans and underwear and kick them away. His hot gaze roams slowly down my body and back up again, leaving a delicious trail of heat in its place.
“Damn,” he breathes.
His eyes meet mine. “You’re beautiful. It’s not enough—will never be enough—those words. But you are the most beautiful person I know, inside and out.”
Before I get a chance to tell him how much he means to me. He steps forward, slamming his lips to mine, dragging a moan from my throat. Small jolts of heat slide across my body as my stomach clenches with need.
“I want to taste you,” I tell him, sliding my tongue along the seam of his lips.
Not breaking the kiss, Luka walks backwards toward the bed. I follow him as he continues to tease me and explore my mouth.
Just as he stops, I give him a slight push. He laughs as he lands, sitting on the bed, but stops when I kneel between his legs. I run my hands up his thighs, hearing the sharp intake of breath.
Giving him a wicked smile, I watch his eyes darken. Leaning forward, I place a soft kiss on the inside of his thigh before continuing a trail up to his bulging erection.
Glancing up at him, I slowly lean in and place a light kiss on the tip before running my tongue across it.
Luka tilts his head back, closing his eyes, fisting the sheets in his hands.
“Kiarra…” He says my name like a plea, spurring me on.
I lean closer, watching each of his expressions, as I run my tongue up the length of him. The minute it slides along him, his eyes pop open, finding mine.
“Fuck, Kiarra.” He moans.
I squirm in place as his raw, husky voice shoots straight to my core, making me wet with need.
Holding his stare, I take the tip of his cock in my mouth and moan, the taste of him driving me crazy. I taste his pre-cum, savoring every drop of it before I swirl my tongue around the head of his cock and suck him into my mouth.
“Your mouth feels incredible.” Luka closes his eyes once more, his mouth dropping open on a long moan.
Fuck. His words are nearly my undoing as I slide a hand down to my core, needing some relief from the throbbing buildup of pleasure.
I run my fingers along my slick folds as I wrap my lips around his thick length. Opening my lips as wide as I can, I take him into my mouth, only making it halfway before pulling back up. He’s thick and long, so I take it slow.
I hear something tear and look up to see Luka’s dark eyes on me as he rips the sheets in his hands.
“You have no idea what you’re doing to me.” He grunts.
Using my free hand, I grip the base of his cock and stroke it while my mouth works down to meet my fist.
“You feel so—” I glance up, watching as his eyes widen when he sees where my other hand is. “Are you touching yourself?”
I give him a sultry smile with my eyes while moaning into his cock.
“Fuck… Are you wet for me?”
I moan a yes. I’m fucking drenched, my fingers slick as they slide over my clit.
“Slide a finger inside that tight core and tell me how wet you are.”
My eyes widen at his words, each one sending a bolt of pleasure straight through me. I feel his alpha power seep out around me, just as his eyes pulse gold.
“Do it. Imagine it’s my cock sliding into you.”
I slide my fingers down and into my core, imagining it’s his thick cock. Keeping the pace of my mouth on his length, I thrust my fingers in and out of my slick heat. Each push and pull makes the pleasure build and spread out and down my thighs.
“That’s it.” His praise and shallow pants make me lose it.
I moan around him, and the vibration from my mouth makes him thrust into me. The thought of his hot cum sliding down the back of my throat as he pumps into me sends me over the top, and I explode.
I come around my fingers, panting and moaning into his cock.
I glance up at him as his eyes stare down at me.
“Now, give me your hand. I want to taste you.”
Stunned by his demand, my mouth releases his cock with a pop.
He reaches down, taking my hand and sucks my fingers into his mouth. “You taste fucking delicious.”
His words make my clit throb, each pull and lick as his tongue swirls around makes the heat build once more.
With my fingers in his mouth, the need to taste him doubles. I move my mouth around him, slowing sliding up and down his length before building a steady rhythm.
I feel his body stiffen. His cock pulses in my mouth, and I know he’s close. I start to pick up speed when he reaches a hand out, gently grabbing my hair to stop me.
“No more. I won’t last much longer if you keep that up, and right now, all I want to do is bury myself inside you.”
But I don’t want to stop. I twirl my tongue around him, taking him deeper before slowly sliding back up.
He grips my hair tighter as more of his alpha power seeps out toward me. “No more.”
I suck the length of him once more, licking the tip before releasing it, and savoring the taste that’s all Luka.
Pulling me up, I meet his lips, straddling his thighs and feeling the throb of his dick against my stomach.
“I want to taste more of you.” He gasps.
“Next time.” I moan into his lips, his cock throbbing beneath me.
I lean into the feel of him, the rise and fall of our warm chests as they slide against one another.
“I need to feel you inside me.” I grind down on him, needing more friction, to be filled by every inch of him until his cock is throbbing and pulsing inside me.
“Fuck.” He trails a hand down the side of my face. “You’re perfect.” His lips brush my cheek. “Every delicious part of you.” He pulls back, his eyes dark, and a wicked smile tilts his lips as he stares right at me. “And I’m going to make sure every inch of you knows it.”
Lifting me slightly, he runs the head of his cock along the length of my slit before pressing the tip at my entrance.
Slowly sliding into me, I feel a delicious stretch, dragging a moan from my lips. Once I’m fully seated on him, I absorb the feeling of fullness. It’s so much better than I imagined.
Luka leans forward, pressing his forehead against mine. “You feel amazing.” His shuddering, warm breath mingles with mine.
“Ride me, Kiarra. Let yourself go and take me with you.” Leaning back, he takes hold of my hips, briefly glancing down at where we’re joined.
He licks his lips as his eyes darken. I grind down into him, making him grunt.
Little sparks of heat shoot straight to my clit as I grind down onto him. I lean slightly back, and the angle makes his cock touch just the right spot. I lose my fucking mind.
“That’s it.” He moans, spurring me on. I start to really move, twirling my hips and sliding up and down on his thick length.
Luka places his palm on my lower stomach and with his thumb, he starts rubbing my clit.
The hot build of pleasurable heat becomes too much, overwhelming all of my senses. I slip into it, letting it spread to every part of my body until it’s all I can see and feel.
I arch into him as he thrusts up, meeting my pace.
“Kiarra,” he moans. His deep raspy voice sends me over the edge, and I explode around him, clenching his cock as waves of pleasure radiate to every part of my body.
He grunts, thrusting into me once more before joining me. The feel of him pulse and throb inside me, drags out the lingering sensation until I’m crying out his name.
We fall back onto the bed, catching our breaths as I land on top of him. I run my hand up his chest and he catches it, bringing it to his lips to kiss.
I look up at him, and he leans down, brushing his lips with mine. I surrender into the soft kiss, letting Luka take the lead as I melt into him. We stay like that for a minute until I move my legs, feeling the slick wetness between them.
I pull back, cringing as Luka chuckles.
“Shower?” he asks, looking at me like I’m his whole world. My heart races at that look, my body becoming sensitive as desire builds once more.
“Only if you join me.”
Luka’s smile spreads as he gets up and pulls me with him. Bending down, he lifts me up and heads straight for the bathroom.
Once we’re in the shower, he slides me to the floor, letting every inch of my body drag down his, spurring me on for round two.
I twist around and reach for the shower head and turn it on, finding the right pressure and temperature. Turning back around, I find Luka frozen and staring at the shower wall behind me, a pained expression on his face. I glance around, but apart from a small crack, there’s nothing there.
“What is it?” I ask, but he doesn’t answer, still staring at that crack.
“Luka?” I walk around to his front and take hold of his clenched fists. He relaxes them, looking down at our hands. “It’s him. My wolf, he wants…”
His body tenses up as a fine tremor works its way through his body. I grip his hands tighter.
“What?”
My heart pounds as I wait for his reply. Lifting his head up, he stares right at me. The look he gives me is filled with dread.
“You.”
The knot in my stomach eases at his word with a shiver of excited anticipation following it.
“Kiarra…”
I give him smile and take his hand. “I want you too. All of you. Let go and don’t hold back.”
As if it’s all the permission he needs, he lets go, releasing the hold on his doubts and fears.
Luka’s body grows, his build expanding, making room for his shadow wolf. His eyes glow, and dark tendrils appear as his shadow wolf comes to the front.
“My turn.” His voice is low and deep as he stalks forward, backing me further into the shower.
A thrill of excitement rushes through me at the dark look in his eyes. A look that tells me all my dark desires are about to reach new heights.
My back hits the wall as he looms over me. His tendrils snap out and wrap around my wrists, yanking them above me and pinning them there. My body arches, trying to reach him, but he stays where he is, drinking every inch of me in.
“Mate,” he growls.
More tendrils appear, sliding over my sensitive body and down to my core. They slide along my folds, the warmth a delicious heat that spreads to my thighs.
More and more tendrils appear, sliding down and across my body. Each brush and caress make the ripples of pleasure expand and grow.
“Yes.” I whimper, needing him to touch me, the physical ache to be filled and stretched all consuming. I clench my thighs together, trying to ease the ache.
He slams his hands into the shower wall beside me, caging me in.
“Mine,” he growls, leaning into me.
His deep rumble sends hot shivers down my spine. I turn my neck, submitting to him, somehow knowing deep down that it’s what he needs right now. For me to submit to him, mind, body, and soul.
“Yours.” I moan, already wet and ready for him.
His hands move to my thighs, gripping them hard as he widens my legs. Each of his fingers leaving behind a delicious imprint.
Without warning, he slams into me, making me gasp. The bolt of desire shoots straight through me.
His hands move to my ass, gripping it hard before pulling me further into his cock. I lift my legs, wrapping them around him as he thrusts into me again and again.
He doesn’t let up. Each thrust brings another wave of rippling pleasure, moving me closer to the edge.
The feel of his punishing grip and hard body as it thrusts into me over and over becomes too much, sending me spiraling into an earth-shattering orgasm.
A moment passes as he stops, his ragged breaths draw along my neck making me shiver. I lick my lips, turning to him, but he pulls out of me, his tendrils quickly releasing my hands as he twists me around to face the wall.
Pushing me down so I’m bending over, he enters me in one swift thrust, making me moan. My hands slap against the wall as he pumps into me over and over, making me dizzy as bliss builds once more. The position feels so much deeper and turns my mind to mush.
His punishing pace pulses throughout my body, my core throbbing as the delicious wave continues to build.
I try to reach a hand down to touch myself and release this relentless build up, but he growls. The tendrils strike out and push my hands back into the wall in front of me.
“Mine.” He snarls, pressing his hard body into mine. I feel his cock swell inside me just as he leans down and bites my neck.
My vision goes black, my only focus the pleasure spanning out throughout my body as I come apart again. I feel his muscles tighten as he thrusts once more, his whole body tense as he pulses inside me and comes.
Releasing my neck, he licks the spot he bit before slipping out of me and stepping back. My body becomes limp, my legs trembling, and without Luka as my anchor, I start to fall.
“I’ve got you,” Luka says, his voice back to normal. He twists me around, pulling me onto his lap as we sit in the shower.
Glancing up, I find a look of worry on his face as he stares at my neck.
“What?”
“It’s healed… but it left a mark.”
“Good,” I tell him.
His gaze whips up to my eyes.
“I like the idea of being marked by you.”
His eyes darken as he smiles down at me. “Are you okay?”
“I’m… thoroughly satisfied,” I tell him, feeling like I need a nap or two.
A laugh bursts from Luka’s lips, his tense body relaxing under me. I smile, seeing a lightness in him that wasn’t there before.
His eyes soften as he stares down at me. “How about I help you shower and then we can head to bed?”
“Together?”
“Together.”
