WHEN I FINALLY CLIMB OUT of Gryphon’s bed close to noon, I drag my ass into the shower and attempt to look as though I slept well and didn’t have my brains eaten out by him last night. I was kind of under the impression that guys only really went down on girls to get their dicks sucked, but Gryphon just blew that theory out of the water.
I turn beet red when I think about him walking around right now, smelling like me and honestly being smug about it. Literally, my skin is glowing and hot as I brush my hair out, and the color of it looks even more bleached out, more white now than silver.
I need to do something about it before it sends me into a full spiral and my Bonded freak out about the mess my head is in.
Brutus sits by the door with me, but August is nowhere to be seen. Gryphon refuses to let them sleep on his bed, and while Brutus will sleep on the floor, under protest, to stay with me, August mostly goes back to North when he’s not allowed to be all over me while I sleep. I miss him and need to go rescue him from North later.
When I leave Gryphon’s room, I can feel one of my Bonds in the living room, and I find Gabe sitting there with the TV off and his phone in his hand as he scrolls aimlessly. He looks up at me and grins the moment I walk in, holding out a hand for me to take as he draws me into him.
“North had breakfast and lunch sent up for you if you’re hungry. Everyone is working. I’m heading into the fifth zone to work on the houses there if you want to come with me.”
I nod and give him a quick kiss, moving over to the small kitchenette to poke around in the fridge until I find the loaded steak sandwich wrapped up in there for me. The chef and kitchen staff are all working in the huge communal food hall for now while the food supply chain starts working and people can go back to eating in their own homes. One of the many things that North is working on at all hours of the day and night. I still can barely believe that this is something he’s been working on for literally ten years, and his uncle for decades before that, just to keep us all safe.
It makes me very proud to be his Bonded, and also a little guilty for not being the perfect Bond for him. I’m too much work, too hard, and too freaking emotional for the good councilman. But I can try to help out and, at the very least, not be a burden to him.
Thank God Gryphon is working this morning and not tripping over my thoughts, I’d never hear the end of it.
I grab the sandwich and take a bite as I walk back over to the couch, thanking all of my lucky stars again for the chef who was clearly blessed by the gods themselves, because this sandwich is orgasmic. Gabe smirks at the look on my face, moving a little so I can join him on the couch and then dragging the coffee table closer for me to put my plate down.
I clear my throat and attempt to look civil as I tear into my food, murmuring around my mouthful, “How are the houses coming along down there? Are they close? I know we’re struggling with occupancy.”
He shrugs and shoves his phone away. “It’s not so bad. The families are mostly bunked in double, but everyone has enough rooms to handle it. This place is about making do and keeping everyone safe, so mostly the lower families are just grateful to be here. The Top Tiers are giving North shit, but he’s put Nox in charge of complaints, so they’ve all shut the fuck up for now. His attitude does come in handy for some situations.”
I snort with laughter at the thought of Nox dealing with those spoiled assholes. “I’m sure he’s loving the work too. Telling people how pathetic and useless they are is kind of his superpower.”
Gabe pulls a face and takes the other half of the sandwich when I offer it to him. There’s so many different fillings in it that I can only manage half, and what a beautiful thing that is.
“He’s been worried about North, so he offered to help the best way he knows how. We all are. Atlas and Gryphon are working through the Resistance stuff, I’m helping with the buildings, and you’re—”
I cut him off. “I’m sleeping in and being hand-delivered food by men who have better things to do. I might go crazy here, Gabe. I can’t sit on my ass doing nothing just because my Bonds would prefer to keep me somewhere safe at all times. I can’t be useless.”
He scowls back at me. “You took out another camp and then came back here to recover from it. Now we’re going to go build some shit. That’s helping out, Bond. If you have anything else you want to do instead, just tell me and we’ll go find North.”
The problem is that I don’t have anything else I can do because I’m a high school drop out who has only ever worked as a damn waitress. I guess I could go work in the kitchens and help feed people, that’s important work. But then North would move security around so I have a TacTeam operative with me, and I don’t want to move people away from other areas just to babysit me.
So building with Gabe it is.
I wash up my plate and grab a Coke out of the fridge to take over to the building sites. I’d love a coffee, but I feel like I’ve taken up too much of Gabe’s morning already, so the Coke will have to do. Gabe pulls on a set of work boots and pulls out a brand new pair for me as well, grinning at me when I sputter out a thank you. It always catches me off-guard when my Bonds buy me things, even just basic necessities, and it takes me a minute to get them laced up properly. They feel like clown shoes on me, big and bulky, but I’d rather have the protection because there’s nothing quite like the pain of a broken toe.
I’m already wearing jeans and one of Gabe’s plaid work shirts over a tank top, like a dress-up doll of what a Builder Barbie would look like. It’s funny, and when Gabe gets a proper look at my whole outfit, he cackles at me, taking a photo that I ham it up in.
When we leave the house on foot, he catches my hand in his and threads our fingers together, sliding on a pair of aviators that make his look unbearably cool. Ridiculously hot too, like almost too much to freaking look at.
How can I feel this way about more than one man? I do, and I don’t feel guilty about it either. I just feel like maybe we need to head back into the house for a quick minute.
Fuck.
Right, distraction. I need one and quick. “I’m dying my hair again. I’m thinking hot pink. Or maybe some lime green streaks. Which do you like better?”
Gabe pulls a face at me. “I thought you were good with North now; who are you trying to piss off with that choice?”
I roll my eyes at him and make kissy noises at Brutus until he comes to walk behind me, butting into the backs of my thighs with his little comfort nudging that he does. He’s always extra affectionate in the mornings, as though me sleeping and not being awake to love on him makes the nights unbearable. “No one. I hate the silver, and now it’s almost freaking white. Black won’t stay in, I’ve tried it before. The purple washed out fast, but at least it stuck around for a few days. I just… don’t want to look at the white for a few days. Maybe I should just shave it off.”
He looks incredibly alarmed and starts rummaging around in his pockets for his phone in a very obvious display of calling in backup. It’s almost comical and, with extreme effort, I keep my face straight as I watch him fumble around for words.
“I don’t think you need to do that—I mean, you can do whatever you want, obviously, it’s your hair but—pink is good.”
He gives me a shaky smile, tapping on his phone without even looking at the screen, and I start counting, because he’s about as obvious as a smack in the face. Honestly, if it wasn’t so freaking funny, I’d be chewing him out for it.
Don’t you dare shave your head. I don’t care what color your hair is, but do not shave it.
I giggle at North’s stern tone and shake my head at Gabe, who doesn’t even attempt to look innocent.
“You’re lucky you’re hot, Ardern, because you’re also a total freaking narc.”
He shrugs. “I work with what I have, and you can’t deny that North is the best person to convince you to do anything. If being an asshole is Nox’s superpower, then this is his brother’s.”
It’s true, and when Gryphon chimes in, he goes for a very different and effective tactic, one I’m not going to tell Gabe about because I don’t need him setting Gryphon on me more regularly.
What am I going to wrap around my fist when I fuck you from behind if you so much as trim it? You’d look good with the pink, the purple was hot too. Just don’t touch the length.
Well.
That sounds very reasonable.
Watching Gabe help with the construction is a great way to spend the afternoon, and I can see why this is where he’s most useful. He’s strong, smart as hell, and knows exactly what the builders need when they start with the framing on the new structure. There’s six other houses on this street in various stages of being built at the moment, and I help with the one that is at the lock-up stage, carrying in supplies and holding up giant sheets of drywall for the guys working there.
At first they all eye me like I’m just there to get in their way, but after a couple of hours of good, honest work, they’re including me in their stories and joking around. It’s hard, but it clears my brain out to actually be helping out. By the time Gabe comes looking for me, I’m up on a ladder having a go at one of the nail guns and whooping with joy when I actually get a piece of the ceiling fixed in place without any new holes in my fingers or hands.
He grins at me like I’m the sun, warming him right down to his core.
I stare back at him the same way, both of us looking like sappy idiots in love. I know this for sure because Elliot, the foreman, tells me so with a hell of a lot of snark in his old, gravelly tone.
“I’m not sure if you noticed, but she’s my Bond. There’d be something majorly fucking wrong if I wasn’t a sappy shit over her. Besides, look at her with all that dirt over her and that big grin. Can’t blame me,” Gabe drawls. Elliot waves us both off for the night, demanding we show up on time tomorrow morning.
“No promises. I’m a delicate princess about my sleep,” Gabe calls back, draping his arm over my shoulders. He’s just as dirty and sweaty as I am, so I don’t feel self-conscious of how bad I must smell.
We walk together through the almost empty streets, it’s mostly dirt and loose gravel on this side of the town because the houses are not move-in ready yet. Eventually, there’ll be cars and all sorts of vehicles here, but we’re not quite at that point yet. The logistics of starting a whole new town and community makes my head hurt. I can’t think about it too much without wanting to puke on North’s behalf.
How is money going to work here?
Job allocation, education, what do we do about crime and neighborhood disputes? I’m fairly certain we’re still in the States, but does the government know about this place? Taxes?
Too much for me right now.
So I focus on the small stuff, the questions I can ask and get simple answers for instead. “How did you learn how to build houses? Or are you just a natural at it?”
He scoffs at me. “I’m not sure there’s any such thing as being a natural at framing, but my dad was a partner in the family construction company. My great-grandfather started it, and it was sort of a tradition that all of the family worked there during the summers. My dad took over the business side of it, but one of my uncles is still on the tools. He’s finishing a job in Nevada and then heading over here, but his family is here. What’s left of it, I mean.”
I grimace, that seems to be a recurring theme with everyone here in the Sanctuary. Loss of family, loss of Bonds, loss of the people that matter most to us all.
He hesitates for a second and then asks, “What did your family do? Before the accident?”
It throws me for a second, but of course he’d ask about my family. Of course he’d be interested. We’re Bonds, and I’ve told him basically nothing about my life before the Resistance took me. Very, very little.
“We mostly moved a lot. I didn’t understand why but now—now I’m pretty sure that Davies knew about me. I think my parents were on the run to keep him away from me. But my father, my biological father, he did something with the stock market. Andrew was an engineer; he ran a business remotely and always had his computer with him while he did consulting work. Vincenzo was once a chef, but gave it up to stay home with me and mom. He was a Neuro and spent a lot of time training me on how to manage my emotions and my bond. My mom… I don’t actually know what she once did. I never asked.”
My voice breaks a little as I say that and his arm tightens around me, bundling me into his warmth a little closer. “You were a kid. You didn’t get the time to grow up and ask her all the shit you wanted to. Nothing to feel guilty about, Bond.”
I nod, but it’s there nonetheless. It always will be.
When we get back to the house, I duck into North’s room to use his bathroom. No one else is home yet, and when Gabe offers to grab dinner for us both, I shake my head.
“I want to find North. It’s Nox’s night tonight, and I need to… make sure it’s going to be okay. I always do.”
Gabe scowls but nods, walking me over to North’s offices without another word. He sees me all the way to the elevator before kissing me goodbye soundly. It’s only been two days since I slept in his bed, but without being Bonded, it still feels like an age.
I’m not sure the ache will ever really go away. I’m doomed to feel incomplete forever.
I scan my card to get access to North’s level and when the elevator doors open back up straight into North’s office, he’s on the phone, frowning and rustling papers in a very frustrated-looking way. He glances up at me and his frown eases a little. August comes out from behind him and bounds over to me joyfully.
I stoop down to give him scratches, cooing at him in a hushed tone so I don’t interrupt the phone call, but North’s tone gets snappier as it goes on, clearly trying to get it over with so he can speak with me.
I feel bad for interrupting, but not quite enough to leave. I’ve barely seen him since we got here, and I’m already missing those long days of being trapped in his bed in the post-Bonding haze.
“Councilman Rockelle, I’m done for the evening. We can get back to this tomorrow. I’m not having another late night. Even I have limits.”
When I take a seat on the other side of his desk, August tucks his head into my lap as he sits on my feet, a weightless bundle of smoke that is still comforting as hell. North glances up at me again and scowls at the distance between us, pushing his seat back a little and then motioning to his lap like he really expects me to get up and climb onto him, no matter that he’s on the phone doing important councilman things.
Well.
That’s exactly what I do.
The frown melts right off of his face as my ass settles in his lap, his hand closing around my thigh to pull me right into his body. I almost make embarrassingly happy noises about being with him again.
I’m not sure Councilman Rockelle would like that.
I lean forward to bury my nose in his neck and North hangs up on the councilman, throwing his phone down onto the desk and leaning further back in his chair and winding his arms tightly around me until I can barely breathe.
“I’m quitting the council. I can’t keep playing the docile role and being kept away from you.”
I laugh into his neck, more breath than noise, kissing the skin behind his ear as I murmur, “We both know you’d be bored in under a minute… or I’d run away. I can’t take the full force of all of your bossiness.”
He huffs and then groans. “The Council should be about doing what’s right for the community, not arguing about what to name things and how many lobster tails each family should be allocated each fucking week.”
I pull back from him a little to make a face. “Seriously? That’s what the Councilman is talking your ear off about? Tell him to come build houses with Gabe, Elliot, and I. We’ll have him too busy to worry about stupid things. Can I get a nail gun? Is there room in the budget for that?”
He raises an eyebrow at me and then rubs a hand over his eyes. “Of course they gave you a high powered weapon to play with, because that’s the latest nightmare I need to occupy myself with.”
He genuinely looks like he’s about to start yelling at people, so I attempt to distract him and save Elliot. “So you’re working overtime on lobster tails and names? Should I be leaving you alone more? Sleeping elsewhere so you’re not distracted?”
He doesn’t move his hand from his eyes as he drawls, “Wherever you sneak off to on my nights, I’ll just come to get you. If you want me to fuck you on Atlas’ sheets while he watches and sees exactly what he’s missing out on, then go right ahead, Bonded.”
My cheeks heat and he knows he’s managed to embarrass me a little, his casual and filthy flirting is a little harder to wrap my head around than Gryphon’s. I’m not sure why, but when he says fuck, my knees go a little weak.
His nostrils flare and he glances down at me, a dark ring circling the outer rim of his irises like he’s desperately holding on to his control. “Do you want me to fuck you here instead? You smell like sex.”
I take a deep breath, but all I smell is his very expensive cologne, the musky undertones of it like an aphrodisiac to me now that I know what his cock tastes like. I swipe my tongue over my bottom lip before I say, “Let’s just say it’s a good thing you can’t read my mind like Gryphon can. You’d know way too many embarrassing things about me now.”
His eyes drop down to my lips and he murmurs back, “If it were anyone else’s night tonight, I’d spread you out on this desk and fuck you until you couldn’t walk straight.”
I swallow and nod. We both know that’s not a good idea on Nox’s nights. Not that I know exactly why, but I know enough about his careful lines with his brother to understand that he won’t cross it. I’m not sure if it’s for my safety or Nox’s, but I’ll play along.
I’m getting awfully good at it.
