WE’RE TRANSPORTED into a pickup area full of Tactical vehicles. I’m wedged between Atlas and North, with Gryphon, Kieran, and Rockelle closing the tight circle we make together. Gryphon’s eyes flash as he checks out the area and, just to be extra sure, I cast out my own gift. North’s eyebrows draw down a little as he watches me, not in a bad way though, just like I’ve taken him by surprise.
Gryphon mutters, “I’m not picking up on anyone. Oli?”
I shake my head. “Closest is half a mile away, in a car driving in the opposite direction, so I think we’re good. I didn’t sense anything ‘wrong’ either. Like shit that shouldn’t be here.”
Kieran gives me a look. “How does that work? You can just tell if something is… what, bad?”
I wriggle out from between my Bonds, stepping around until I’m taking in the surroundings with my eyes and not my gift. I roll my shoulders back, poking around at the warehouse a little as the other teams start filtering in. “I don’t know how it works, really, just that my bond can tell if things are there to hurt me.”
Atlas stretches out his arms, like being transported has run through his muscles and left an ache behind. “That’s how it knows who to take out when it’s Rending. It just takes the souls of people there to harm you.”
Rockelle nods along and then grins. “So we’re safe so long as we wish you no harm? Noted. Shore better grovel before anything goes down.”
I roll my eyes at him and then follow Atlas over to the vehicles. We’re all going to be traveling together and we’re going to be the third car in the convoy. I feel bad for whoever is lead car, the most dangerous spot, because if someone is contaminating our water supply, then there’s every chance that this entire trip is happening on the Resistance’s whim. They could be anywhere, at any time, and I need to stay sharp.
Gryphon has clearly learned that the best way to approach me is the one where no one will ever know it’s happening and just talk to me through our mind connection. I’m not groveling. Black was being a dick, but I’m not ashamed of my Bonded or what we do together, and you shouldn’t be either.
I duck down to check the undercarriage of the truck North points out for me, pushing at my gift just to be extra sure there’s nothing under there. Then why was North so pissed off about it? If it’s all just a proud Bonded moment then that isn’t at all embarrassing.
If he had his way, North Draven would have you locked in a tower right now, completely unreachable to anyone who isn’t in our Bond Group, and even then, he’d only give the rest of us access to you because it would hurt you not to. He’s a jealous, possessive dickhead, and I’m not. I want everyone to see what’s mine and know that they’ll never get to have something as fucking perfect as my Bonded. I’m a smug asshole, but an asshole all the same.
Damn.
It’s a very good explanation, even if I really want to stay pissed at him, I can’t. I can’t because I’ve known he was smug, and proud, about having me. I knew how much he loved being the first to Bond with me, no matter the circumstances, and it’s always made me feel like maybe I could have this.
Maybe I could keep them all and not become a mindless killing machine.
Are you still pissed? I’ll slit Black’s throat and bleed him out right now.
I straighten up and give him a very sassy look. No the hell you won’t! That’s not just your friend and colleague anymore, he’s Sage’s Bond. But fine, your soul can escape the next killing round. I’ll let you live to make it up to me later.
His eyes smolder back at me, fiery depths beneath the calm facade he’s putting on for everyone else. I love those depths and the stream of filth that comes out of his dirty mouth when he leans into it.
If you two are done, can we get back to what we’re supposed to be doing here?
I startle at North’s haughty tone and duck my head, climbing up into the backseat of the truck without another word.
“Are they giving you shit again? You’d think they could leave you be for a couple of hours while we work,” Atlas grumbles as he slides in next to me, pulling on his seat belt before helping me with mine.
“Gryphon was just apologizing. He’s not great at it, but it’ll do,” I tease, ignoring the way Rockelle overhears and cackles as he climbs into the back section. He’s got a gun in his hands, and when he clips himself down to the floor and sets up like he’s about to be shooting out of the back of the truck, I give North a look.
“Why does this feel like we’re entering a war zone? It’s a trip to Walmart for water,” I sass, wiggling my ass a little to get settled.
North climbs in and takes up all of the remaining room in the backseat so that I feel as though I’m being crushed between him and Atlas again. Weirdly, it’s more comforting than problematic.
Bonds are fucking weird about this stuff.
He doesn’t bother with his own seat belt, just grabs the bar that runs above his door frame and holds on while Kieran gets us on the road. Gryphon’s in the front seat, his eyes still white as he monitors everything around us.
North has to speak loudly so that I can hear him over the truck’s engine, even with all of the windows sealed shut with bulletproof glass. “We have supply runs and incoming resident drop offs every day, and at least sixty percent of them have been attacked or raided in some way. Since this trip has been forced by the Resistance, I’m betting it’s not going to be a smooth ride. There’s a reason we’re all coming along. Water is too important to hold off on, but with our gifts, we should be able to minimize the fallout.”
Interesting.
“Is there any chance that you guys would let me be involved in the supply runs and incomings? I could be really useful here, more useful than learning how to build houses.”
All three of my Bonds speak over each other in agreement.
“No.”
“Absolutely not.”
“I didn’t want you coming today, these two insisted.”
I glance at Atlas, surprised at his reply, but he just shrugs. “I’m a lot happier with you being in the Sanctuary. I’m not going to lie and say this is all fine with me, but there was also no way that they were bringing you and leaving me behind.”
I sputter over my words, “I—my bond is more than capable of handling shit if things go wrong!”
“Yeah, and yet you still spent two years being tortured by Silas Davies. I don’t doubt you, but I also don’t doubt that he’s a fully Bonded Neuro with the ability to shut your brain and bond down.”
I cross my arms. “He’s powerful, but his range is shit. Gryphon’s gift is better.”
Atlas nods and shrugs again. “And yet, Silas is still our biggest threat. Maybe, and I really mean maybe, the Draven nightmares could deal with him. If North or Nox’s ranges are as good as they seem to be, we might be able to use one to take him out.”
I already know their range is phenomenal, Brutus came to the camp with me, and while Nox couldn’t tell where we were, he could still see through his creatures’ eyes. Gryphon had told me that and told me how worried they’d all been when I’d given him to Kyrie.
Still the best decision I’d made in that stupid camp.
I glance up at North, but he’s still scowling at the road like he’s expecting trouble, so I take a small breath in and call on my bond.
Let me out.
I internally roll my eyes. I just need to know if there’s danger. I don’t need you going full death god on this mission.
I can feel the ripple of frustration and then it speaks again, Let me out and I’ll keep them safe. All of them, even the non-mine ones.
Is it strange of me to be jealous about my bond being that possessive over my Bonds? Probably. Maybe I do need that therapy.
My eyes void out and the Everlasting One stiffens in his seat, his hand on my thigh tenses but doesn’t move. He’s not scared, just ready to move should he need to.
The Dark One doesn’t react, just turns to speak to me. “Is there danger? Is she safe?”
Still very devoted to the girl.
I like that.
“Not yet. She’s going to be fine, whatever that takes.”
He nods and makes a hand motion at my Bonded. My first Bonded, the one I finally got to taste. The one who unlocked more of my power, more of the potential living inside the girl, until I could access more and keep her safe and alive.
I want more.
“No more of that thinking. You’re not going to keep her safe like that,” he says in a tight voice, and I smile back at him, all teeth and sharp edges.
“You’re no fun. Give me my Bond instead.”
The girl disagrees with me. She attempts to wrestle back some of the control as the driver curses under his breath, hitting the gas and getting the vehicle moving faster underneath us. I look out, but there’s nothing there. Nothing but miles of farm land and livestock around us. This place we’ve been brought to is somewhere remote enough to barely exist on a map.
“How far away are we?” the Everlasting One says.
The driver snaps back, “Too far with her doing that back there. Can you get Oli back now?”
The Dark One cuts in. “No. If her bond is out, then she’s taking this seriously. Just get us there and don’t worry about her. You’re on her safe list anyway. Rockelle is the only one who needs to be sweating.”
There’s quiet in the cab for a moment, only the roar of the engine to be heard, and then the Gifted in the back says, “How do I get on that safe list? Is there an application process, or do I just have to break my own leg? I’m not against it or anything, just not exactly my first choice.”
I turn to look at him and smirk at the sheer terror that flits over his face before he regains control of himself, tightening his grip on the gun.
When I turn back to the front he mutters, “Fuck. It’s so much worse when it looks at you.”
The Everlasting One turns to snap, “Stop calling my fucking Bond an it. She’s Oli, and she’s trying to keep your worthless hide alive, so keep your mouth shut.”
I don’t feel the need to show affection or prove my connection to any of my Bonds, but I cover his hand with mine on my leg as a form of praise. His loyalty to me and our Bond has never been in question. It’s not his fault he was born in a pit of snakes. He came home the moment I called to him. He came for the girl and offered her comfort when she needed it.
The Everlasting One leans down to kiss my cheek, murmuring to me, “You’re glowing. It’s cute as fuck, but Black is sweating in the front over it, so you might want to work on it.”
I shake my head. “He can work to get over it. I’m perfect as I am.”
The Walmart parking lot we pull into is in the middle of nowhere. Literally, there’s fields full of cows surrounding us on all sides, and then a massive superstore just appears out of thin air.
When we park, Gryphon gets out first, doing the initial sweep. It takes a lot longer this time, mostly because he’s vetting the hordes of people who are here shopping, and filtering through that many brains the way he does takes longer than searching out an empty warehouse or a road ahead of us.
When he meets my eye and jerks his head at me to join him, the Dark One gets out to open my door, his body shielding me as I work. There’s no one here from the Resistance. There’s no danger here at all, which I feel is more of a warning than a relief.
Where are they hiding, lying in wait for us?
Why won’t they come out and play with me?
My Bonded looks down at me and when I nod at him for an all clear, he starts barking out orders to the Gifted surrounding us. They move the moment they have their directives, but when he gets to me I shake my head.
“Oli will go—”
“No.”
Both of my Bonded turn to look at me, but my eyes stay on the side of the building where there’s a driveway to the back for the receiving area. There’s a large truck already around there being unloaded, and while there’s nothing there so far, that is a warning to me. I don’t like it.
I don’t like it at all.
“Okay. Oleander, Draven, and Bassinger will stay here and help with the perimeter patrol while we get the supplies. No one get in my Bonded’s way or approach her, especially when she’s working. You don’t want to catch her bond’s interest, trust me.”
There’s a murmur of agreement and then they all move out. I couldn’t care less about them or what we’re actually here for.
I want that truck.
There’s no need to say that out loud or to discuss a plan, I just stride over there, secure in the knowledge that mine will follow me. Of course they will, where else would they need to be when I am in their presence?
So they follow me and we walk together over to the loading area at the back of the huge building where the truck has caught my attention. I can’t focus on anything else, which is all that needs to be said because I am a god.
I am never wrong.
The communicator in my ear makes a noise and then my Bonded’s voice comes through clearly to me. “Do not leave her side. Whatever ambush they’re planning, she’s feeling it. Do not leave her.”
The Dark One answers, “We already had that figured out. No one is leaving her. Get the stock and get out of there. Keep your head in the mission.”
I come to a stop in the center of the road about ten feet away from the truck. Both of my Bonds attempt to move me, but this is the spot. There is nowhere else to be right now and if any vehicle approaches, then that’s an issue for them to deal with.
I cannot be moved.
We stand there and when either of my Bonds attempt to speak to me, I ignore them, waiting for the moment. I know it’s coming. I know it as surely as I know that I must protect the girl. I will not be swayed from this spot until it comes. Whatever it is, whatever is coming for us, this is where I will deal with it.
I lose track of the passing of time.
I know that there’s movement around me, a lot of Tac personnel approaching us and being redirected in their rounds as they patrol the area. I can feel their tension, the way that my strangeness and otherness is getting them all rattled. Even though they’re all very well trained and aren’t reacting to it, I can feel it.
I can taste it in the air.
My Bonded’s voice comes down the comms again. “We’re loaded and ready to go. I’ll send the other two groups, ours can stay until Oli is done.”
The driver speaks again, “I’m packed and ready to move, just give the word.”
The Dark One replies, “She’s fixated on the truck. We’re not going to move until she’s ready. We trust the bond above all else.”
I almost preen at that, almost, but then there’s a pop sound five feet in front of us and three men appear out of thin air. I don’t recognize any of them, but I know who they are and what they’re here for.
Me.
The girl and the being inside her.
My Bonds as well, if they can manage it.
“Little Render, you are proving to be quite the pain in the ass now, aren’t you?” the older man in the middle says, his pockmarked skin stretching over his toothy grin a little too tautly.
I wave a hand and the souls of the other two men tear out without any real effort, their bodies falling to the ground with twin thuds.
The Dark One steps into my body a little closer, his shadows falling from his body like dark smoke on a lake in the clearest night. He looks like death immemorial and pride swells in my chest at the magnificent sight of him.
The Everlasting One is struggling to hold himself back, struggling not to throw himself over me because the urges to protect his most beloved Bond are so strong. I want to reach out to him, to comfort him and remind him that all of this is meaningless to me.
I just want to know what else the Transporter has to say because why else would they send us three men? Granted, the one still breathing is strong. Very strong, strong enough that I’m not just going to waste a good soul and tear it out.
No.
He’s a delicacy, something worth taking and consuming slowly, piece by delicious piece.
“Well, well, not strong enough for me? You probably should have counted on us sending someone higher up than Franklin for you. He was the lowest of what we have. You’re going to regret running. Oh, the things Silas is going to—”
“I’m done with this,” I interrupt and reach out a hand, something to call the soul over to my body with. I don’t need to do this when I cleave the souls out, when I’m just doing this to kill people. No, I let them disappear into nothing just like they deserve.
But this one looks yummy.
“What the fuck is she doing?” the Everlasting one mutters, but the Dark One doesn’t answer. He’s too busy watching me rend the soul away from the body and tuck it into my being for later.
As the last man’s corpse lands on the ground, my Bonds both stand there for a second and then, when no one else pops into existence around us, the Dark One steps over to turn the body using his foot. His shadow walks around it with him, sniffing at the corpse as though he can get more information that way.
“That’s Giles Andrews. He’s one of Silas’ favorites, a Transporter who has never been caught before. He doesn’t have to touch you to move you, and his range is… was unmatched,” the Everlasting One says, and the Dark One nods.
“He’s been on our list for years. He was pivotal in the riots back in the seventies. He just removed half of the Resistance when things weren’t going their way.”
I step around the Everlasting One. “He’s testing the girl and me. He’s testing to see how much stronger we have gotten. Killing Franklin proved to him that we’ve Bonded and gotten stronger, but he’s not going to come himself unless he’s sure he’s still stronger, so he’s sending in the others. Sacrificing them for information, and they’re following his orders like the good little brainwashed sheep they are.”
The Dark One stops to look at me, his shadows still moving forward. “We need to talk about this.”
The answer to that is simple, especially with the voice that shares my mind chiming in. “The girl says no, so I will not. She says not right now, and you will agree to that.”
He blinks at me once and then nods slowly, and the Everlasting One looks between us in shock at the interaction.
I can feel the soul wriggling in my belly, waiting for me to take the time to properly consume it, but I will not take the risk while the girl is still out here in the open.
“Take us back to the safe place now. I’m hungry.”
They do as I say without another word shared between us, flanking me as we walk back over to the truck that is already on and ready to leave. My Bonded stares over the hood at me like he’s trying to pry everything out of my mind, but I just need the girl safe so that I can eat.
He nods and gets in the car, then we’re off, back on the road at breakneck speeds, leaving the bodies of the Resistance men behind like the worthless trash they are. No one speaks on the trip back, not any of my Bonds or the other two, not even the mouthy one.
I stay focused on my prize, right until the driver parks the truck. We get out as one and he Transports us back to the safe place. I can finally leave the rest of this to the girl.
Dinner time.
My bond leaves me in a rush, like a balloon deflating, and I double over as I retch. It hasn’t ever felt like this before, like the power of tearing that Transporter’s soul out and… consuming it has messed my stomach right the hell up.
I feel strong hands sweep my hair up and hold it away from my face. Even though nothing is actually coming up, it’s sweet of North to attempt to help out with this.
When I stand back up, he tugs me into his arms, his hand moving from my hair to the nape of my neck to hold me close. “Motion sickness? Or the bond?”
“The bond. I think I’m processing the soul, which is the most horrifying sentence of the week. I can—it’s in me. I can feel it there while my bond is snacking on it. Gross. I’m officially a mon—”
“Don’t. Don’t even mutter that word around me, Oleander. You just took out another key player in the Resistance arsenal, another Gifted we no longer have to factor into our plans thanks to you and your bond. I hate that you’re going through this, but it will never make you a monster.”
I want to believe him, and my bond agrees with him completely, but as I feel the squirming in the pit of my gut, it’s not exactly easy. There’s a living soul in there.
Someone’s essence, their life force, the thing that makes them a human, and my bond is chomping away at it like a kid with a hefty slice of chocolate cake.
I don’t want to think about it anymore.
I don’t want to think about anything.
North walks me back to the house and hands me one of the bottles of water we’d brought back, pressing it into the palm of my hand and then standing over me until I’ve drunk the entire lot. I have to threaten him to get him to leave me here alone and go back to his office, mostly because I don’t want him hovering over me if I’m going to actually be sick.
Once he leaves, I climb into Gabe’s bed and pull the blankets over my head, wallowing in his scents like a lovesick brat while I attempt to ignore the happy munching happening deep in my gut.
It’s really disgusting.
Atlas finds me in there an hour later, huffing and rolling about like an idiot. When I glance up at him, just a little embarrassed about the state I’m in, he smiles at me, leaning against the door frame.
“How are you feeling? Are we about to take an epic nap?”
I sigh and pull myself up into a sitting position, shaking my head. “No, I’m trying not to have a freaking meltdown about this new and improved party trick my bond has pulled out. You can’t even act like it’s normal and fine, Atlas. I was still aware in there. I saw your face.”
He grimaces a little and then takes a seat next to me, slinging an arm over my shoulder and pressing a kiss into my hair. “I was just shocked. It’s not… something I’ve heard of before. I thought—I don’t know what I thought it was doing, to be honest. What can I do, Sweetness? What can I do to make this better for you?”
I sigh and lean my head back to look at him properly. “I’m tired. I don’t want to face everyone once North tells them all what happened, and they’ll all want to talk about it. I’m also sick of living on top of each other. I’m irritable, and I know that none of this matters because we’re safer here and protecting vulnerable people, but I’m so fucking sick of this shit.”
He nods slowly and brushes the hair away from my face gently, looking so deeply into my eyes that I almost feel shy about the intimacy of it. “Use your mind link and tell North we’re going for a ride on the ATVs. Tell him you’re safe and that we’ll stay in the view of the cameras the whole time. I know where they are; we can drive in their path. I think we all know that your bond has you covered even if something happens to me.”
I raise an eyebrow at him but when he doesn’t say anything else, I do as he asks. North is good about it, only replying, Tell me when you’re on your way back so that I know you’re safe. Don’t do anything stupid, Bonded.
Atlas shoos me out of the room and tells me he’ll pack for us both and to go grab the ATV. I give him a curious look, but he just shoos me out of the house entirely.
I duck into the garage, looking for the keys I need, and find Gryphon already there with a helmet for me. When I roll my eyes at him, he just puts it onto my head for me and drawls, “As if I’d let you sneak off without saying goodbye. Bassinger is probably going to find a cave to hole up in for a month and I’ll have to come looking.”
Hmm.
I’d probably be okay with that. I let him buckle the strap before I reply, “You’re not going to be mad at me for running away?”
He shrugs and adjusts the straps until the helmet is snugly in place. “Nope. I heard everything going on inside your head when it happened. You need a minute to figure that out, and you’re going to get that minute, even if I have to use every trick in the book to keep North from coming out there after the two of you.”
Well, shit. Now I want to break down and cry over his thoughtfulness. “I just need a break. I love you all, but I really need to breathe. And, like, a whole day of just dealing with one of you and not the whole bunch arguing about rationing and Tac bullshit.”
His eyes are hot as he swoops down to kiss the life out of me, a blistering show of force that nearly sweeps me off of my feet. I have no idea of what prompted it but, hell, maybe I want Gryphon to come along for the ride too.
When he finally breaks away from my lips, he trails kisses from my shoulder up my neck to just under the strap until he can murmur into my ear, “I love you too, Bonded, but maybe you should have saved saying that to me for my night, because now I’m thinking about stealing you away and leaving Bassinger to himself.”
I flush, realizing now what I said, but I snark back, “I don’t want to sleep in the hut, that’s the whole point. I feel like I’m… on show, twenty-four-seven, and it’s so freaking uncomfortable. I’m— it’s— I need a break.”
He nods and sucks on the skin under my ear. “We’ll figure something else out. We’re already doing what we can to get the big house done as soon as possible. Once you’ve Bonded with everyone, you’ll feel less… exposed.”
I scoff at him and snap, “Well, that’s never going to freaking happen, because Nox would rather cut his own dick off than sleep in the same bed as me, let alone Bond. Shit. Forget I said that and don’t you dare narc on me. I mean it, no Dravens.”
He bites the inside of his cheek like he’s stopping himself from speaking, but when I glare a little more, he nods. “Your secrets are safe with me. Even the ones in your head.”
He glances up as though he’s checking the door for anyone coming in to spy on us both, then leans down to whisper my deepest, darkest fantasies to me. “Like how much you want that orgy you’ve been dreaming of.”
