The next morning, I wake up in between Loki and Kai, my pussy sore but my heart full.
“Morning, darling,” Kai whispers, his amber eyes gazing into mine as he reaches out to stroke a finger down the side of my face.
“Good morning, my love.” I beam at him, feeling Loki stir behind me.
“Morning,” Loki echos, his voice gruff and husky as he pulls me close to him. His hand reaches around to stroke my stomach. I feel those flutters again, tickling my insides.
A knock sounds at the door and I turn my head to see who it is.
“Willow is waiting downstairs, Baby Girl,” Jax says, opening the door and finding me nestled in amongst his friends. His lips quirk up in a smile at the sight of us. “Something about a wedding dress appointment?”
“Oh shit!” I exclaim, scrambling to get out from between the boys. “I’d completely forgotten about that!”
Yesterday, I’d messaged Willow, asking if she would come with me today to look at wedding dresses, and she jumped at the chance. I rush round Loki’s room, where we all stayed last night, grabbing my clothes and getting dressed. I had a bubble bath before bed, so I still feel fairly fresh, and frankly don’t have the time to shower now.
“Catch you guys later.” I hurry over, kissing Kai first, then Loki. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” I wink at them, causing both of them to chuckle in response.
I’m only teasing them. We spoke about the new development in their relationship yesterday, and they both decided that they enjoy each other sexually, but would find it weird if I wasn’t there too. I did assure them that if they wanted to play without me that was okay, but they just looked at each other, and shrugged, again saying they would rather I was there. I’m not going to complain, it’s like having my own male on male porn show with front row seats. Hot as fuck!
I kiss Jax when I reach the bottom of the stairs, grabbing my thermos and a homemade granola bar that he holds out for me.
“The car is waiting for you girls,” he tells me, Ash being with his parents again this weekend. I hate that he has to keep going there, especially with what I know about, and have experienced firsthand with Julian.
“Morning, babe,” Willow says, laughing at my no doubt flustered appearance. “I bet those boys kept you so busy with the D that you forgot. Tell me I’m wrong!” She laughs as my face goes red, remembering what happened yesterday.
“Something like that,” I respond with a chuckle, grabbing my phone and purse as we head out of the door.
“I need all the deets, like yesterday!” she begs, linking her arm through mine as we exit the front doors to find a limo waiting for us. Nice touch, Jax. “My love life is shit, nonexistent at best.”
She huffs and it’s my turn to laugh. I know that she’s waiting for the right person to lose her V card to, so she isn’t actually that desperate to jump into bed with just anyone.
I look up as the driver gets out, coming round our side to open the door for us. A blush steals across my cheeks as I meet the blue eyes of Tom, the driver that took Loki and I to the airport and…yeah. Willow gets in, but my steps falter as he continues to stare at me. Not in a creepy way, but there’s an intensity to his stare that makes me pause.
“Hello, Tom,” I greet him, and he blinks as if from a daydream. “Can I, uh, help you with something?”
“Apologies, Miss Darling. You just remind me of someone I used to know,” he replies, shaking his head and giving me a small smile. “Congratulations on your engagement.”
“Uh, thanks,” I say, ducking my head as I climb in the car, shaking my head at that strange encounter, putting it from my mind.
As we make our way into town, I give her a rundown of what happened after we caught up with Loki, her eyebrows getting higher with each word.
“Fuck me,” she sighs, fanning her face. “Talk about hashtag-livingthedream.”
I smile, even though my face is hot and I know that I’m blushing redder than a whore in church. She’s right, I am living the dream.
The car comes to a stop, and I look out the window to see that we’re outside a very upmarket looking bridal shop. It has a quaint feel about it, being in one of the older buildings, so it doesn’t feel sterile like some I’ve seen and expected this one to be.
A bell above the door tinkles as we open it, and a woman in her late forties approaches us, a kind smile on her face, and a tape measure around her neck.
“Welcome,” she greets us, looking incredibly attractive in a grey pencil skirt and white blouse, a red silk scarf tied around her neck and her dark hair in an updo. “You must be Lilly. My name is Jen, and I’ll be helping you today.”
“Pleased to meet you, Jen,” I smile back, butterflies taking flight in my stomach now that I’m here, surrounded by a sea of white and cream lace. “This is my friend and chief bridesmaid, Willow.” I indicate Willow, who looks back at me with shock in her eyes.
“I am?” she asks, her wide eyes a little misty.
“Of course, if you want to be that is?” I ask, a little hesitantly.
“Abso-fucking-lutely!” she squeals, throwing her arms around me. She pulls away after a quick hug, wincing and looking over at Jen. “Sorry, mum always said I have a sailor’s mouth.”
Jen just laughs, holding her hand out towards a younger girl, who steps forward with a tray. On it sit two flutes of bubbling champagne. I’m reminded of the Halloween party and the fact that being rich clearly allows underage drinking.
“I’ve heard worse,” she chuckles. “Champagne?”
“Oh, um, I can’t, because, um, I’m pregnant,” I stutter out, her face showing no shock or judgement. A breath of relief whooshing out of me at her lack of negative reaction.
“Amelie, something soft for Lilly, please,” she asks the younger girl, who smiles, letting Willow take a glass before heading to the back of the shop, and disappearing through a door. Jen looks back at me. “So, do you have any ideas of what you’d like?”
“Well, not really, no,” I say with a chuckle, feeling another blush steal over my cheeks.
“That’s absolutely fine,” she says, guiding us towards a rail of dresses. “Let’s start here, at the empire line ones, which will be easier for you in your condition.”
She starts pulling out the most beautiful dresses I’ve ever seen. Lace, tulle, sparkling crystals, and beads, all in shades of white, cream, and champagne, even a few in light gold. She tells us that she designs them all, and with the help of a series of seamstresses, sews them in the workroom at the back of the shop.
But gorgeous as they are, none feel quite like me.
“I’m sorry,” I tell her, sitting down on a plush grey velvet love seat next to Willow. “They’re just not…”
“You, no. And no need to apologise,” Jen assures me with a smile, looking me over and no doubt noticing my rainbow patterned Run and Fly dungarees. Not exactly subtle and elegant. “I wonder…Amelie,” she calls, and the younger girl comes out from the back. “Bring the dress you’ve been working on, please.”
“W–what?” Amelie asks, her eyes wide. “Really?”
“Yes, please,” Jen replies, smiling kindly at her, and I admit that the fact she clearly supports and encourages her apprentice makes me like this woman. Amelie turns back around, heading out the back once more.
She returns a few moments later, and I sit up straighter, my heart thudding as I see the spill of colour across her arm. Standing in front of me, she lets the hem drop to the floor and I gasp, completely lost for words.
It’s an empire line, like the others, with an off white beaded lace covering the shoulders, and coming down to cover the bust part as well. My eyes travel down the fall of plain soft white chiffon that starts just under the bust, and ends in a train at the back, the hem decorated with a matching beaded and lace pattern as that of the top.
But the thing that makes this particular dress perfection, is that it appears to have been dipped into a sunset, the colours bleeding up the skirt, finishing probably around knee height. It starts as a deep indigo at the hem, turning into violet, then purple, magenta, pink, red, orange, and finally a burnished yellow.
“I think, by that look, we’ve found your dress,” Jen says softly, and I tear my eyes away, moisture filling them as I look at her and swallow hard.
“It’s perfect,” I whisper, my eye drawn back to it, loving how the colours shift and change tone as the light falls across it.
“Let’s try it on then, although I suggest we leave any alterations until closer to the time to account for your changing shape,” she tells me, ushering me into a changing room and hanging the dress on a hook by it’s wooden hanger.
Stripping quickly, I reach out, feeling the softness of the material before slipping it over my head. It falls around me like a cloud, the lace and chiffon settling on my body almost as if it were made for me. Although I’ve yet to do it up, I can see that there’s enough room for alterations, and the sunset coloured hem catches my eye once more, my smile turning giddy at the sight of it.
Looking back up, I can’t tear my gaze away from my reflection in the mirror.
I look like a bride.
It hits me then, really hits me, that I am getting married. That I’m having another man’s baby, the best friend of my groom to be. What a mess. But looking into the mirror, at the bride that I will be, it suddenly feels so real.
“Are you ready, Lilly?” Jen’s soft voice calls on the other side of the curtain.
“Yes,” I reply, taking a final look at the woman standing in the mirror before me.
Ready as I’ll ever be.
After wowing Willow, Amelie, and Jen at the dress shop, all declaring that the dress was perfect and ‘the one,’ Willow and I head to the tea rooms for a late lunch. Luckily, my sickness seems to be abating somewhat, so I’m able to drink a delicious cream tea, and eat finger sandwiches and mini cakes.
We head back to Highgate, deciding to spend the rest of the weekend watching Netflix and chilling. Kai and Loki join us, Jax appearing some time later, sweaty and delicious looking from a workout. After showering, he joins us too, lifting me up, and sitting down, placing me on his lap, then pulling one of the blankets over us.
“Hey,” I murmur, snuggling into him as he pulls me closer, a low rumble sounding in his chest.
“Hey, Baby Girl,” he replies, and I feel his words vibrate against my ear. “Did you find your dress?”
“She found the dress to end all dresses!” Willow exclaims, gesticulating and sending popcorn flying. I chuckle at her antics, so pleased that she’s here with us. “It’s fucking incredible.”
“I’m glad you found something, baby,” Jax tells me, a smile clear in his voice even though I can’t see his face. “I can’t wait to see you in it, even if I’m not the one putting a ring on your finger.”
My heart aches, and I sit up, pushing away so that I can look into his beautiful blue eyes. The light of the TV casts them in a kaleidoscope of blues, changing from almost navy to ice. My brows drop, my lips parting as I struggle to find the right words.
“I wish…” I start, taking a deep inhale, then releasing it slowly. “I wish I could marry all of you, officially. A part of me hurts having to marry only Ash. But it also feels so right at the same time, you know?”
He reaches out, cupping my face in his huge palm and I can’t help but nestle into it.
“I know,” he says back, his voice a little gruff. “And none of us hold that against you. We know that you’d marry all of us if you could. Sure I’m jealous as fuck that Ash drew the lucky straw, and I can’t wait to get him in the ring to take a little bit of that out on him,” he adds, an evil grin pulling up the corners of his lips that makes me worry for Ash a little. “But I’ll get over it. We’ll get over it, Baby Girl.”
I lean in, placing a gentle kiss on his lips, a sigh caressing mine as I pull away again, aware of Willow being here.
“Thank you, my love,” I whisper, his nostrils flaring and his grip around me tightening at the nickname. I love all of their reactions when I use it.
He pulls me close again, his hands stroking down my back in a soothing caress that soon has my eyes closing, his heartbeat lulling me to sleep.
JAX
I hold Lilly tightly as her body grows heavy against mine, her breathing evening out as she falls asleep under my touch. I love how she’s so comfortable now that she can do that. Trusting me to take care of her when she’s at her most vulnerable.
I meant what I told her. I wish to god it was me she was marrying, but as long as I keep getting moments like this, I’ll get over it. Especially if I can get Ash in the ring a time or two.
Willow looks over, seeing that Lilly is asleep, and quietly leaves, saying that she’ll text Lilly tomorrow.
“How’s Enzo?” Loki asks, careful to keep his voice low so as not to disturb Lilly. She stirs slightly, then settles back down when I keep rubbing her back.
“Good. Pleased about his wedding invite,” I smile, remembering Enzo’s knowing smile as he told me that he and Rosa will be there.
“Jeez, Erica works fast,” Loki comments, sounding impressed. He’s right to be, Ash and Lilly only gave her the list of invitees yesterday and already she’d sent the invites by courier.
“How did training go? Did you get the fight moved?” Kai asks, the TV screen reflected in his glasses hiding his eyes.
“I’m almost back to where I was before,” I tell them, feeling the ache of my muscles that I’ve been working hard on lately. “Enzo managed to get it postponed until May seventh, but they wouldn’t do it any later.”
Loki whistles and I glare at him as Lilly stirs again.
“Fourteen days before the wedding…better than the day before I guess,” he comments, giving me one of his shit eating grins that tells me he’s about to say something insulting. “At least the bruising will have a chance to heal a little so you don’t look shit in all the photos.”
I growl, grabbing a pillow and launching it at his head. He ducks, which just makes me growl again as it flies past him. Lilly grumbles in my arms as the move jostles her, and I glare at Loki, smoothing my hand down Lilly’s back until she’s still once more.
“She’ll want to come, you know that,” Kai says, voice lowered, and I pull the girl in question tighter against me. “We won’t be able to stop her.”
“Fuck,” Loki hisses, and I agree with him. Underground MMA fights are no place for a girl like her, especially not in her condition.
“All of you will have to keep her safe, away from the scum,” I tell them, my lips twitching when Loki’s jaw clenches and Kai grinds his teeth.
“Of course we will keep her safe,” Loki all but snarls at me, Kai giving a sharp nod of agreement. “And if anyone so much as looks at her wrong…”
I know that my grin is as feral as both of theirs, as bloodthirsty. Some things in life are simple, at least that’s what I’ve always thought.
If anyone goes near our girl, they won’t see the sunrise the next day.
