Devastation is written across the face of my reflection in the veil and a tear of frustration escapes my lashes and slips down my cheek.
I have lost her. Forever.
Poetry suggests that the heart is the seat of all emotion, but I had never really believed this. Closing my eyes, an image of Ella fills my mind and a sharp pain stabs at my chest. I place my hand over my heart as if that will somehow dull the terrible ache, and I realize now that these poems speak truth.
Father, Oradan, and I make our way back to the castle in silence. When we reach the entrance Eryl rushes toward me. “Ryvan, what happened?”
Unable to hide my grief, I lift my gaze to his as despair bleeds into my voice. “I loved her and I have lost her, Eryl. She is gone.”
Eryl places a hand on my shoulder as his gaze locks with mine, his expression full of pity. “I am sorry, Ryvan. Truly.”
I want to rage at him for telling her what he did, but I cannot. He spoke nothing but truth. It is not my brother’s fault that I am cursed.
As we walk inside, the palace seems deserted. Most of the guests probably left soon after my father’s announcement, once they realized that their goal for the evening was no longer attainable.
I’m about to make my way to my chambers when an impulse stops me. I must speak with Lorala first.
When I reach her guest chambers, I knock. It doesn’t take long for her to answer, her surprise to see me easily read in her eyes.
“Ryvan. I—I did not expect you.” She hesitates. “Is it your mating cycle? Did you come because you—”
“No.”
Her shoulders sag in relief; she is obviously pleased by my answer.
“I came here to tell you that I cannot bond with you.”
She frowns. “Have I displeased you?”
“No,” I quickly reassure her. “It is nothing you have done.”
She takes my hand. “You are my friend, Ryvan. We have known each other since childhood. I know what you are, and I would protect you if I can. So, if that is what you are worried about, you need not be concerned. I already know the truth. We may not be in love, but I care about you; I would not see you put to death.”
With a slight clench of my jaw, I lower my gaze. “Your words and your kindness mean more to me than you could possibly know, Lorala. But it is more than that.” I lift my eyes to her. “I am in love with someone else.”
She tilts her head to the side to regard me. “Is it the woman you danced with this evening?”
“Yes.”
“Is her Light Magic strong enough to—”
“No. She is human. Her true form was concealed by magic.”
Lorala blinks several times in shock, but says nothing.
I continue. “Even though I cannot be with her, I also understand that I can be with no one else, either.” I swallow against the lump in my throat as I give her my truth. “My heart still beats within my chest, but it is no longer mine. It belongs only to her.”
Her eyes meet mine, full of pity. “I am sorry, Ryvan. A broken heart can be a terrible thing. I cannot deny that I worried our bonding would be… uncomfortable, because I consider you a friend, not a lover. Know that you will always have my support, and that I will keep your secret, my dear friend.”
“Thank you, Lorala.”
