It’s been two days since Haidyn choked me out and helped Saint place me in a straitjacket for him to brand me.
I woke up confused hours later back in his bedroom naked and feeling drowsy. I cried a lot. Then Saint gave me a bath. While he bathed me, Saint explained that Haidyn had knocked me out and Devin had dressed it with cream and a bandage. He took it off for my bath and put on a new one afterward. I have a fresh one on now. I haven’t seen it nor do I want to.
They branded me. A part of me no longer feels anything. My family is dead, my life just …gone. What else is there to do?
Rolling over in Saint’s bed, I stare at the empty spot next to me. He wasn’t here when I woke up this morning. It’s not the first time this has happened, but he didn’t leave me any information as to where he’s at, and I don’t have a phone. Mine was ruined when it got placed in a flower vase and something tells me I’m not going to get a new one. Everyone that I’m allowed to talk to is here. Why would I need to reach the outside world? I’m dead.
A knock on the door has me sitting up, the movement making me flinch as the bandage pinches my skin over the brand. “Yeah?” I call out, and my voice cracks. I haven’t said much in the last two days. Saint keeps feeding me pain pills that either make me sleep or drowsy. He’s bathed me the previous two nights, brought me food, and keeps me in bed. Says I need to relax and let the brand heal. Devin comes in to check on me and changes the bandage. My neck looks better and no longer needs one.
The door opens, and my pulse races when I see Saint’s father. His green eyes search the room as if he’s looking for his son. When he sees I’m alone, his cold stare meets mine. “Your presence is required.”
The hairs on the back of my neck rise at his words. “For-for what?”
“A session,” he responds.
I let out a sigh of annoyance. I thought I was done with those. “Yeah, okay. Just, uh…I need to get dressed.” I stumble, trying to explain that I’m naked and in his son’s bed. It’s not like he doesn’t know we fuck. He saw him take my virginity.
He nods. “She’s expecting you in the basement.” Shutting the door, I frown.
Why the fuck would I need to go to the basement? It would be easier if she just came to me.
Throwing off the covers, I use the restroom and grab a piece of toast that Jessie brought me earlier with my breakfast. I haven’t touched it until now. Might as well eat something. Who knows how long she’ll force me to listen to her annoying voice?
I get dressed, throwing a T-shirt on with a pair of Saint’s sweatpants. It’ll rub the least on my brand. After I put on some socks and tennis shoes and throw my hair up in a messy bun, I leave Saint’s room.
You know that feeling when you stand up too fast and get dizzy? That’s how I feel. I don’t know if it’s because of my lack of food or the fact that Saint gave me a pain pill at three this morning, but either way, I feel weak and tired. I’m going to crawl back into bed after the session.
Making my way down in the elevator, I reach the basement level. It’s quiet down here and always cold. It smells of rotten eggs—demons. The stories of Carnage that I heard when I was little were that they torture until they finally get tired of playing with you and let you rot. The souls stay trapped to haunt the new ones brought in while they await their same fate. Torture at its finest.
“Ashtyn. Hello, dear.” My mother’s therapist walks toward me. The way she’s smiling makes me think that maybe she doesn’t know my mom was killed.
“What are we doing down here?” I ask. Carnage is a massive place with multiple buildings scattered over the land. It’s a maze that one could get lost and never be found in. So why here?
I’ve been told that it was once a college that was started in the late 1800’s that was eventually abandoned. Now that’s just hearsay, considering if you google it, there is absolutely nothing to find on said college. But I’m not surprised. To the world, Carnage doesn’t exist. Therefore, neither would the college that the Lords acquired.
“How are you feeling, Ashtyn?” She ignores my question and asks her own. Her eyes scan over me once as if assessing me and her lips frown.
Did she expect me to be runway ready for her? “I’d rather be in bed.” I cross my arms over my chest.
“We’ll make this quick.” She assures me and turns her back walking back down the hall where she came from.
I follow her slowly, not liking the way she said we as in I won’t be alone with her. Maybe Saint is with her? He has to be here somewhere, right? The sound of her heels clapping on the concrete floor echoes off the walls as she sways her hips back and forth in her tight pencil skirt. She’s got a silk blouse on that’s tucked into it. Her hair is up and in a tight, perfected bun. I wonder if she comes here often? I know she’s friends with my mother, but I don’t remember her ever being close to my father. So why would she be here at Carnage?
She comes to a stop in front of a room, and I stumble over my feet when I see it’s the observation room. The same one I stood in when I watched the Lord drop off his wife to be sentenced to a long life of torture. Also, the room that their fathers watched me get branded from.
“Come on in, hun. It’s okay.” She smiles at me.
“Why are we here?” I take a step back. “Why are you here?”
She frowns, tilting her head to the side. “I’m here for you, Ashtyn. I know the past few days have been…difficult, and I want to make sure you’re okay.”
“I’m fine.” I go to turn around and head back to Saint’s room, but I stop when I see his dad standing at the opposite end. Swallowing, I try to slow my racing heart and not panic. I don’t know what they’ll do to me without Saint. I should have never left his room. But I didn’t really have a choice either.
“If you’re going to stay here, you’ll have one session a week,” he informs me. “It’s part of Saint’s and my…understanding.”
I don’t know what he means or why my mental health would matter to him. They don’t want you levelheaded here. Maybe that’s the plan, to make me think I’m going insane. The Lords are masters at manipulation. But I don’t want to make Saint mad. He’s the only one really on my side. The one who has taken care of me even if it’s in his own twisted way. It could be much worse. “Yes, sir,” I say, and he nods, turning his back and walking off.
Doing so myself, I turn back and enter the room. The first thing I notice is the two-way mirror. I’m unable to see through it because it looks to be blacked out somehow. Like they’re hiding what’s on the other side of it. The second thing is there is a metal table in the center. A chair on either side facing one another.
“Have a seat, Ashtyn.” She offers me a chair with my back to the glass and sits across from me.
I fold my hands on the cold table and shiver, wishing I had grabbed one of Saint’s hoodies out of his closet before coming down here. “Do you know?” I ask her vaguely, seeing if she needs an explanation.
“I do.” She nods.
A silence lingers in the room at her acknowledging my mother has been killed. She doesn’t even bother with giving me her condolences. Instead, she asks her own question. “Which Spade brother are you the closest with?”
I frown. What kind of question is that? “Why?”
“I’m just curious.”
“I’m Saint’s chosen.” She knows this. She and my mother were so worried about me not bleeding at the vow ceremony.
“Yes but they all three fuck you, no?”
I stiffen in my chair. My pulse thrums in my neck. “A Lord is allowed to share his chosen with whoever he wants,” I add softly. Everyone knows this. It’s not a secret. It’s another way for the Lords to throw their power around. But I actually love Haidyn and Kashton. They’ll always hold a special place in my heart.
“Are you being cautious?”
My frown deepens. Why the fuck does she care about this shit? But her question has me thinking…I haven’t been on birth control since I’ve been here.
“I doubt Saint would be happy if one of the others knocks you up.” She goes on.
“Oh, no that wouldn’t happen.” I shake my head.
She tilts her to the side. “And why is that?”
“They…” I trail off not wanting to finish that sentence.
“I see.” She writes something down in her notebook. “They don’t fuck you vaginally.”
Why does that sound more vulgar than anything Saint has ever said to me? I bow my head, refusing to say anything to that and avoid eye contact. If my mother knew what I allowed the Spade brothers to do to me she’d be so ashamed.
“Would you say that you care about Kashton and Haidyn the same as you do for Saint?”
“What kind of session is this?” I ask defensively.
“It just seems that they are willing to risk their lives for you, and I’m trying to figure out why.” She places her manicured nail on her chin. “It can’t be sex. Kashton and Haidyn have their own chosens. I’m wondering what you offer them that they can’t get elsewhere.”
I glare at her, trying to decide her angle. Is she questioning me or them? She knows that they won’t tell her shit. So I’m guessing she thinks I’m the weakest link. Family recently dead, me freshly branded. The newest victim to Carnage. She thinks I’ll spill information on them. It’s probably their fathers wanting to know, and I refuse to give it to them. I’m not a snitch. And no matter what they’ve done to me, they’re all I have left. I know if something were to happen to Saint today, Haidyn and Kashton would never abandon me.
I cross my arms over my chest and sit back in my seat. The cold metal is making me shiver even through my shirt.
“Show her.” She calls out.
I frown, looking around. “Show me what?” Who is she talking to? Getting to my feet, I turn and stare at the two-way mirror.
Just then I realize it looks black because the light is off in the other room. It comes on, lighting up the space, and I see a man hanging from the ceiling. His arms are cuffed above his head, secured to a chain. He’s shirtless, but his jeans sit low on his hips, showcasing his abs and deep V. His body stretched while he gently sways back and forth, shoes dragging across the concrete floor.
His muscular body is taut. Blood runs down his arms from his cuffed wrists, his bare chest is covered in sweat, and white sticky pads on his abdomen have wires running to a machine that sits on a roller cart next to him. He’s got a black hood over his head, hiding his face, but the Lords crest branded on his right pec is clearly visible.
The door opens to the opposite room, and someone new enters with a black cloak and Lords mask on. I place my hands on the glass. “Who is that?” I ask, licking my lips nervously.
She doesn’t answer.
My breathing picks up when the man in the mask comes to a stop by the machine and flips on a switch. “Ready for your session?” I hear him speak to the man in the hood.
He doesn’t move or answer. He’s either passed out or gagged.
“Let’s turn it up this time. I think your last session was too easy.” He turns a knob, and the lights dim as the man hanging starts to shake, his legs kicking, muscles straining, and I realize that the patches on his body are electrocuting him.
“Stop!” I say, slamming my hands on the glass. “What the fuck is he doing?” I turn to look at the woman. “Why is he doing that?”
“Actions have consequences, Ashtyn.”
What the fuck is she talking about? I turn back to look through the two-way mirror, and he turns the knob off. The man sags in the cuffs. His chest is now rising and falling quickly as he breathes heavily into the hood. His abs contract as he continues to sway back and forth.
The man in the Lord’s mask turns it on again—higher this time—and the man’s body spasms. I bang my fists on the glass. “Stop. Stop. You’re going to kill him.”
The man in the Lord’s mask laughs, and I know he can hear me. Haidyn said that they could hear me just not see me when he found me in here.
“How do you not know that man doesn’t deserve his punishment?” she asks me, reminding me I’m not alone.
I didn’t answer her. The Lords never ask questions. They decide you don’t deserve what they give you and they take it away. You’re never innocent until proven guilty.
The Lord slaps the man hanging on the back, and it causes him to spin around in the chains. I see there are more of those white sticky pads on his back as well, but that’s not all. There are also red marks that cover his tan skin. He’s been whipped.
“Why?” I face her once more and demand. “Why are you making me watch this? Why did you want to even see me?”
She gives me a soft smile. “This is a reminder, Ashtyn, from the Spade brothers.” She means the fathers. “That you are a guest here, and it will be best to remember that.”
I look at the glass, and the guy in the Lords mask turns off the white patches, and the shirtless man hangs in the cuffs connected to the chains. “Until next session,” he states before walking over to the door. He shuts off the light, bathing the room in darkness before he exits.
I return to Saint’s room, get undressed, and crawl into bed, whimpering at the sting of my brand. The last pain pill Saint gave me has officially worn off. Or maybe it’s because of what I just saw. I hate knowing the man still hangs in the dark, probably terrified.
How long will they play with him before they kill him?
It makes me think of my brother. What he’s seen or had to do to people here. Is that why he ran? Was he really set up by the Lords? Or did he do what he was accused of?
I’m not saying that Saint, Haidyn, or Kashton are innocent. I’ve seen what they do here, and it’s terrifying. But they have no choice, right?
Their fathers wanted to give me a message today. One that I can’t ignore. I get it. I’m only safe because of Saint, Haidyn and Kashton. They think I have something with all three of them. Don’t I? I love all three of them but in different ways.
The sound of the door opening has me sitting up. I flinch at the sudden movement, the bandage pulling on the edges of my branding.
“Hey, you okay?”
I look up to see it was Saint who entered. I’m on edge. Afraid now that his father will come and get me for another “session.” “Where have you been?” I ask, tears starting to sting my eyes.
“House of Lords. We had a meeting this morning.” He comes to sit down next to me. “I’m sorry, you were sound asleep. I didn’t want to wake you.”
“It’s fine.” I wave him off. A part of me thought he was hanging in the basement. The man looked familiar even though I couldn’t see his face, and the mind likes to play tricks on you.
“Here.” He gets up and walks over to his nightstand. Opening up the top drawer, he pulls out the pills and pops the top. “Take one of these and get some rest.”
I greedily take them when he offers me the bottle of water that sits on my breakfast cart. I hope it makes me pass out.
“Good girl.” He leans in and gently kisses my forehead. “I’m going to take a quick shower.”
“Then you’ll lie down with me?” I ask, needing him right now. Even after everything he’s done to me, I feel safe with him.
“Of course,” he assures me.
I lie down and snuggle into his pillow when his cell rings. “Hey, man…yeah, I’ve tried calling him twice. He hasn’t called me back yet…yeah, probably.”
“What was that about?” I ask.
Saint plugs his cell phone on his nightstand and looks at me while pulling his shirt up and over his head, exposing his chiseled abs. “That was Kashton. He wanted to know if I’ve heard from Haidyn.”
I yawn. “Why?”
“He was the only one who missed the meeting this morning.” With that, he turns and walks into the bathroom.
I yawn again and close my eyes. But they spring open the moment what he said registers in my brain. I sit back up, my heart racing, when I hear his shower start. Was that Haidyn hanging in the room? Surely not? Why would they torture Haidyn? Why would his father allow that?
Snorting, I remind myself that it’s common for fathers not to care about their children. “Saint?” I call out. “Saint?” I do it again.
I have to tell him what I saw. If it’s Haidyn, I can’t leave him down there hanging in the dark. All alone. Saint can help him, right?
“What’s wrong?” He comes running into his room, no towel and dripping wet. He had already gotten in the shower. His cell beeps, signaling a text.
“I…”
“One sec.” He interrupts me picking it up. After typing out a message, he sets it back down. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. It was Haidyn. What do you need?”
It was Haidyn? I look at his phone and then back up at him. “Nothing.” I breathe a sigh of relief. My mind is playing tricks on me. Of course it wasn’t Haidyn. I’m paranoid.
“You sure?” he asks, water dripping onto his floor.
“Yeah.” I lie back down.
He turns and walks back into the bathroom, leaving the door open in case I need him. When I hear the shower door open and shut, I lean over and pick up his cell. I check current messages and see Haidyn’s text. I open it up.
Sorry slept in. What’d I miss at the meeting?
SAINT
I left Ashtyn in my bed, needing to talk to my father. She’s been here two weeks, and I can see her going stir-crazy. She’s always been one to get out and go places. She’s not a homebody, and there has to be something that can be done.
Just yesterday, she asked me about finishing her classes online for Barrington. I hated to tell her that she will no longer get to graduate. To the world, she’s dead. I can’t change that. No matter how much I want to.
After she fell asleep last night in my arms, I thought about it. And I wouldn’t change it even if I could. If whoever is after her thinks she’s dead, then they can’t hurt her.
Stepping off the elevator, I come up to his office door but pause when I hear his voice on the other side of it. “What do you suggest I do?” He sounds irritated.
I don’t blame him. One of his brothers is missing. Our fathers are as close as me, Kash, Haidyn, and Adam. Although I’m pissed off at Adam right now because he left the love of my life behind to die for his sins. There’s still no word on her father or Adam. At this point, I don’t expect either one to show up at the gates of Carnage in one piece.
“I have connections.” I hear a woman’s voice answer, and my hand tightens on the doorknob, recognizing it. “There’s a facility…”
“No,” he growls, interrupting her. “Saint will never agree to that.” I almost smile that he thought of me. He doesn’t give a fuck about her. But he doesn’t want to piss me off. Last time I spoke with him in his office after he found I was hiding her in my room, he told me I could have her. Of course I didn’t give him much of an option.
She snorts. “You’re in charge here. Not Saint.”
“It’s complicated,” he states.
“Look…” She sighs. “I’m not trying to harm her.”
My jaw clenches at the lie. I know what she’s done and what the bitch is capable of. I put nothing past her.
“I can prescribe her medication. Place orders to keep her so high that she won’t even realize where she’s at…what’s going on. She will be in a safe place under twenty-four-hour supervision. You’ll have full access to her. And if Altus shows up…”
“I don’t know,” he says conflicted.
“Abso-fucking-lutely not!” I shove the door open, and it slams against the interior wall.
My father jumps up from his seat, and she spins around to face me. Face tight. “Saint—”
“You touch her, and I’ll slit your fucking throat.” I interrupt whatever bullshit she was about to spew.
She gasps and looks at my father. “You’re going to let him speak to me like that?”
“Leave us.”
“What—?”
“Get the fuck out,” he barks at her.
She lifts her chin and stomps out of the room, slamming the door behind her.
I walk over to his desk, slapping my hands down on it. “She’s not going anywhere,” I say through gritted teeth. Ashtyn’s life may never be what she wanted, but she will have one here. With me. I can make her happy. I can give her everything she wants except freedom. I won’t risk her life. Someone wants her dead; I refuse to let anyone get that close to her. “We have a deal,” I remind him.
“Saint…”
“I mean it, Father.” I don’t give a shit what her excuse or concern she has regarding Ashtyn. She’s here under my protection. “If anything happens to her—”
“She’s safe.” He raises his hand, cutting me off. “I gave you my word.” At least he remembers our last conversation.
Ending this current one, I turn to leave when he calls out my name. “Saint?”
“Yeah?” I ask, my hand on the doorknob to leave.
“We gave her to you, but she only gets one chance. If you can’t control her, she goes down to the basement where she’s free game.”
“But—”
“That’s all I can promise you, son. One chance.”
Coldness rushes through my veins at the threat, but I nod. “Understood.” Yanking the door open, I exit, shutting it. Free game? Means anyone will get a piece of her. They will rip Ashtyn to pieces down there. I can agree to whatever the fuck he says, but I’ll never let it happen. Even if I have to keep her tied to my bed or locked in my closet, I will not let it get to that point.
“She’s unstable.”
I come to a stop at the woman’s voice behind me. I turn to face her.
“She’s unpredictable. Her entire family was. I’ve been seeing her mother for years. Ashtyn too. I have a long list of reasons as to why she should be medicated and locked in a padded room.” She steps closer to me. “Remember that the next time you threaten me.” She goes to walk by me, but I reach out grab her dark hair with one hand while the other slaps over her mouth before she can scream. I slam her back into the wall, placing myself in front of her and pinning her to it.
Wide eyes stare up into mine. “If you’re going to threaten someone, you better make sure they don’t have something they can use against you.” She sucks in a breath through her flared nostrils. “I know what you did.” She tries to shake her head, but my hand on her face tightens, making her whimper into it. “I have a video of it.” Her body sags against the wall. “Touch her, and I’ll make sure it’s released.” Removing my hand from her face, she gasps in a breath.
“You wouldn’t…” She doesn’t even try to deny it. “You’d implicate yourself.”
She’s right. I’ve gone to extremes to ensure that I get what I want. Knowing that there would be consequences if anyone ever found out. The risk is worth the reward.
I smile. “That’s the thing about a man with everything to lose. I’m willing to sink the ship. And I’ll make sure you drown with me.” With that, I push off her and step into the elevator. I make my way back to my room to find Ashtyn still lying in my bed, sound asleep and naked.
I’m on the clock. Either she goes crazy and my father locks her up downstairs or I watch her slowly die inside.
I have to get her out of here. Even if it’s just for a few hours. Take her mind off this hell.
Getting an idea, I smile and pull out my cell, sending a text to Haidyn and Kashton.
Want to go for a ride?
They both respond immediately.
