I’m shaking, my entire body throbs and aches.
Just like everything else. The drugs—the ones I took—plus the ones they gave me no longer linger in my system. I just feel ashamed now. Pathetic. I thought for years that I killed him, and I grieved the loss of him.
I’ve feared a lot over the years. But leaving here made me realize how much I fear myself. I willingly shot the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I would have done anything for him until I was put in a position where it was him or me, and like a coward, I chose myself.
But he pulled me back to his hell, and now I’m his prisoner. His chance at revenge. His whore. Is it bad that I’m glad he’s still alive? He’ll most likely make me regret what I did. I should have run farther, for longer. But I only had enough help to get out of Carnage. After that, I was on my own, and starting a new life was harder than I thought it’d be.
I sniff, trying to calm myself and stop the tears. Crying won’t save you, Ash. That’s what my mother used to tell me whenever life wouldn’t go her way. She’d straighten her shoulders, lift her chin, and face the fucking day like she was unstoppable. Obviously, she wasn’t. Watching her get stabbed to death proved that she wasn’t.
Lifting my forehead from my knees, I jump to my feet when I see a set of green eyes watching me. “Sa-int?” My voice cracks just saying his name as I stare at him. They used to be so bright, but now they’re a darker shade of green.
How long has he been in here watching me? This is what he’ll do. Have eyes on me at all times. There are probably cameras all over my room and bathroom.
He pushes off the counter, and I swallow nervously as I watch him pick up my towel. He holds it open for me, standing next to the tub, hinting that it’s time for me to get out.
Slowly, I step out on shaky legs and stand before him dripping wet and naked. I feel nervous. I’ve let this man violate my body, yet it feels like it’s about to be our first time. I wasn’t even this nervous then.
He brings the towel to wrap around my shoulders. He runs the soft material up and down my arms, over my chest, and over my lower abdomen where my brand is. He pulls it from my shoulders and crouches down in front of me, taking his time to wipe off my shaking legs.
When he stands, he tosses it to the side, and I wrap my arms around myself. Goose bumps cover my skin, and I can still feel water run down my back from my hair. I shiver when his eyes meet mine, and it’s not because I’m wet and cold.
He’s changed. I’ve never stopped to think what he would look like now if he had lived. I saw him bleeding, lying there in the hallway, coughing up blood. And it changed me. I’ll never be the same.
But here he is, standing before me looking like the god I remembered him to be. Have you ever seen a Lord go after someone who wronged him? I have, and it’s bloody. Lots of screams and torture. I have no doubt he once loved me, but he doesn’t anymore. I ruined any chance I ever had of a future with him.
We were going to have a family and grow old together, but it was all bullshit. I was kidding myself, making up a world that would never exist for me. Him making me his pet is the closest I’ll ever get to him loving me again. And I’ll take it. I’d rather believe the beautiful lie than a sour truth.
He’s lost the black hoodie and mask. He now wears a black T-shirt that pulls tight across his broad shoulders and muscular chest. It shows off the ink that covers his neck and arms. I can’t help but wonder where the bullet hit him and if you can even tell. Has he covered it up with ink?
I reach out, my hand going to his T-shirt, but his shoots out and grips my wrist, making me jump in surprise.
He steps into me, grabbing my other wrist as well and shoves them behind my back. He pushes my arms behind my back and wraps one large hand around my wrists to hold them in place. The position forces my chest to push into his.
His free hand comes up and cups my chin. My breathing accelerates. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, needing to say the words before he kills me. I need him to understand that I never meant to hurt him. I loved him.
“For what, sweetheart?” he asks, tilting his head to the side.
The sound of his voice…that nickname…my thighs clench. “Saint…” My lips tremble. “I—”
“Shh,” he says softly, running the pad of his fingers over my lips. “It’s okay, Ash.”
Tears prick my eyes at his lie, and my throat closes, making it hard to swallow the sob I don’t want him to hear. I did this. This is because of me. I didn’t trust him, made a choice, and now I have to live with the consequences. Well, until he kills me. Is it bad that I hope he draws out my punishment? A part of me feels like this is my second chance at love. At what I wanted us to have from the moment I decided to be his. But I’m not stupid—love will no longer exist between us. Not on his side anyway.
“I knew I’d find you in here.”
I jump at Kashton’s voice.
“Join us,” Saint offers, his eyes watching the first tear run down my cheek.
Kashton comes to stand behind me, and I sniff when both of his hands grip my wrists to hold me in place as Saint lets go and steps back from me. He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a pair of handcuffs. My knees buckle.
“Whoa.” Kashton chuckles, holding me up by my arms. It pinches my skin, making me cry out. “No need to get on your knees yet, sweet cheeks.” His laughter grows.
“Here.” Saint holds out the handcuffs. “Make her more comfortable.”
Kashton grips both of my wrists in one of his hands while he takes the cuffs from Saint. I don’t fight. It’s useless. He places the first one on, tightening it, and then the other. It’s the kind with the hinge in the middle so there’s no give. My hands lie across the top of my ass, and I jump when Kashton’s arm wraps around my neck from behind.
I rise up on my tiptoes and swallow as his muscles flex, holding me in place. I can breathe, but barely.
Saint reaches up, rubbing his chin while his eyes look me up and down. “How?” I ask breathlessly.
“How what, sweetheart?” he asks, meeting my stare again.
“How did you know where I was?” I have to know. He could have just taken me at any time. I know Saint. If he knew I was living in Las Vegas, then he would have known for some time. He does his research. He stalks his prey. That was not the first night he had been into Glass to see me. Although that was my first time seeing him.
He ignores my question. “You look…stunning, Ashtyn.”
I whimper at his words, and Kashton presses his body into my back, smashing my already cuffed arms between us. His large muscular arm is still wrapped around my neck, and it makes me arch at an uncomfortable position. My wet hair sticks to my exposed skin, making me shiver.
“These tits.” Saint’s hands come out and grip both of my breasts, massaging them before pinching my hard nipples. “They look good.” Stepping back into me, he finds my eyes. “They will look even better with my cum all over them.”
A moan escapes my lips, and Kashton laughs. “I think they need some jewelry,” he suggests. His free hand comes around and grabs my left breast.
“No—”
Kashton’s hand releases my breast and slaps over my mouth before I can finish my protest.
My fight or flight kicks in, and I start thrashing in his hold. His arm around my throat flexes again, tightening, taking away what little air I could still breathe in. I try to kick out my legs, but Saint steps into me, sandwiching me between them. They’re both six-five. Towering over my five-five. I’m barefoot, and they’re wearing combat boots.
I’m fucked. Forget the fact I’m handcuffed, soaking wet, and naked.
Saint’s eyes narrow on mine. “You need to understand one thing, Ashtyn. You’re here because I want you here. You have no say in what I do to you. You’re mine to use, to play with. When I’m done with you, I’ll be sure to return the favor.”
My eyes widen, knowing what he means—shoot me. But it won’t kill me. No, Saint will make sure I suffer for a long time for my betrayal.
“That’s if Haidyn doesn’t get to her first.” Kashton laughs, and the blood rushes in my ears at the sound of the name.
My lungs burn, tears fall down my face, and my chest heaves as I try to breathe. Saint’s figure fades in and out, and my eyes grow heavy.
I’m not dying, just passing out. They won’t kill me this soon. I know how they work. They like to play with their food before they eat it. I think that’s the worst part. I know who they really are. And how fucked I truly am.
My body jerks involuntarily, fighting to breathe before everything grows bright and almost euphoric-like. Saint has choked me out before during sex, and I loved it. I’ve even come waking up with him still fucking me. It was hot as hell.
Kashton’s hand leaves my mouth, and he removes the arm around my neck. He steps back from my body, and I fall to my knees, unable to hold myself up. A cry rips from my lips as I hit the marble floor. I’m coughing, lungs burning as I lean forward with my hands cuffed behind my back, sucking in a deep breath. Spit flies from my mouth along with the tears that fall from my watery eyes.
A hand grips my wet hair and yanks my head up. I look through watery lashes to see Saint crouch down in front of me while Kashton holds my head in place.
“I always loved you on your knees,” he says. Reaching out, he cups my tear-streaked face and runs his thumb over my trembling lips. I take a shaky breath, and he slides it between my lips.
They automatically wrap around his thumb, sucking on it. It’s like muscle memory.
He smiles. “That’s it, sweetheart. Such a good girl.” He pulls it out, and I take another quick breath before he shoves two fingers into my mouth this time, making me gag. I try to pull away, but Kashton’s hand in my hair prevents that.
Saint removes them, and Kashton laughs. “Looks like you’ve been a lazy whore, sweet cheeks. Spent too much time on your back rather than on your knees.”
I lick my wet lips and taste my tears. Saint frowns at me. “You’ll work on that first. We know how much I love fucking that pretty face of yours.” His eyes travel down my body before he slaps my outer thigh. “Spread your legs.”
My back is arched at an extreme angle from Kashton’s hand in my hair. My knees hurt, legs shake, and my feet are already going numb while I try to catch my breath from being choked. I no longer feel my hands, other than the cuffs digging into my wrists and lower back.
I adjust myself to spread my legs the best I can in my position. Saint’s hands slide up my inner thighs, and he digs his tatted fingers into my skin, making me hiss in a breath. He wears several rings, and each one leaves a fire as they slowly make their way to my pussy. “You’re wet, sweetheart.” He slides two fingers all the way inside, curling them inward, and I moan. His laughter follows. “Still the same whore that I loved to fuck.”
“Sa-int?” I gasp as he pushes a third into me. My mind flashes back to the way he fucked me at Glass, and my knees slide on the wet marble, opening up more for him. The floor digs into my sensitive skin. “Please?” What am I asking for? I’m not sure. Kill me? Fuck me? Knowing Saint, he’ll make them both feel equally as good.
“Begging already?” He chuckles. “You always were an addict, Ashtyn,” he adds. “You want to be seen, need to be loved, and beg to be fucked.”
His thumb plays with my clit, gently rubbing over it, and I push my hips forward, wanting him to pinch it, slap it, anything to make it hurt.
I like pain.
But he removes his fingers and Kashton releases my hair. My head falls forward, and the wet strands cover my face to help hide my embarrassment. The handcuffs are removed from my wrists, and my hands come up to cover my face as I begin to cry.
“You get one day, Ashtyn.”
I look up at Saint to see him leaning up against the counter like he was when he was watching me in the bathtub. His body tenses, and his eyes narrow. Just a preview of what’s to come between us. Sex, fight, and crazy madness. It’s comforting to know not much has changed between us.
I loved him, but even I can admit we were toxic to one another. I always challenged him in a way that forced him to prove who he was. This time will be no different.
Hurt me, fuck me, love me comes to mind. I guess two out of three isn’t bad.
“One day to relax, regain your strength. After today…” He pushes off the counter to stand in front of me. He doesn’t bother crouching down his time. Instead, I lean my head back to look up at him as he glares down at me. “Your body is mine; your mind is mine, and your will is mine.” With that, he exits the room, and I uncurl my legs out from underneath me. I rest my back against the side of the bathtub and close my eyes, trying to hold the tears back.
SAINT
I find myself sitting back at my desk, watching her on my screen. She’s lying under the covers on her bed, crying while in the fetal position.
My cell rings as it sits on my desk, and I pick it up seeing the name flash across it. I answer and place it on speakerphone. “Hello?”
“You have a problem,” the man says in greeting.
Kashton snorts, getting up from his desk to come over to mine. “That’s nothing new.”
“Seriously. Ashtyn was supposed to have worked last night, and she never showed.”
I frown and remind him, “You knew we were coming to collect her.” Once we found out where she was, we made some phone calls to get our plan in motion.
“Not at Glass. Her other job.”
I sit back in my chair and look up at Kashton, who runs his hand down his face and asks, “And?”
“And I’m calling to warn you that she’s looking for Ashtyn.”
“She’ll never find her.” I shake my head.
I’m aware that Ashtyn had two jobs. I watched her for three weeks before I made my move. I wanted to see what kind of life she lived. I wasn’t surprised to see that all she did was work. She always needed to stay busy. And as far as I know, when she left Carnage, she had no money, and my girl fights to survive.
“Look…” Bones sighs heavily into the phone. “I didn’t get in your way because you and Ashtyn have a past. You came to us and gave us a heads-up of your plans, and we appreciate that courtesy. But I’m telling you right now, Jasmine will find her. I’ve known her all of my life. She’s fucking stubborn and will not give up until she’s standing at your doorstep demanding to take her home.”
“I’ll take care of it.” Kashton chuckles, running his tatted hand down his unshaven face.
“By take care of it, I expect you to send Jasmine back untouched when she shows up at your door,” Bones adds tightly to Kash. “She isn’t part of your world,” he growls, referring to the Lords. “She’s one of us, and we don’t tolerate anyone fucking with what’s ours.”
Click.
“Fuck,” Kashton hisses, his joking attitude now long gone.
“Well, that could have gone better,” I state the obvious.
“I can handle it.” Kashton nods to himself.
“How? You’re here at Carnage, and she’s there in Las Vegas. It’s not like you can fuck her from two thousand miles away.”
The Lords have always done business with the Kings. Just like our fathers, their fathers handed them a legacy they didn’t want. But just because our worlds intertwine doesn’t mean that Bones knows everything.
The Lords have been paying for Queens—the Kings escort service—for years. Jasmine used to be a queen for a short while, and Kashton was one of her best-paying customers. Still is as far as I know, although she no longer works for the Kings. She started her own business. One that we know of well. But I guarantee you the Kings and Jasmine have no clue just how intertwined our worlds are. And I’m sure as fuck not going to be the one to tell them.
“I’ll call her.” Kashton finally speaks.
“And tell her what?” I question. “If Bones is right, it’ll lead her to our front door sooner rather than later.” I would prefer to avoid a scene. I’d really hate for us to piss the Kings off, but Jasmine is crazy if she thinks she’ll walk out of here with Ashtyn. I’ll throw her in a cage in the basement and call Bones to come and fetch her before I allow Jasmine to take what’s mine.
“What do you want me to do?” He throws his arms up in the air.
“Drop it,” I answer. “She has no clue that you even know Ashtyn. Let’s keep it that way.”
It’s pure coincidence that a woman Kashton has been fucking also knows Ashtyn. It really is a small world. But it also worked in our favor. When we found out that Ashtyn was in Vegas, it was the best outcome we could have hoped for. Because like Bones said, we gave the Kings a heads-up that we were coming, and they didn’t stand in our way. It also just pissed me off how close we had been to her and never fucking knew it.
Kashton gives me his back before stomping out of the office and slamming the door shut. I know Kash, and he won’t drop it. I just have to be prepared for what’s to come.
Opening my top desk drawer, I remove Ashtyn’s cell that I took from the bathroom back at her house in Las Vegas. I unlock it and see she’s got over fifty missed calls and countless texts. I’ve had her phone on silent, not wanting to be bothered by it. It’s almost dead.
Skimming the calls, I see they’re all from BOSS LADY a.k.a. Jasmine.
No surprise that 90 percent of the texts are from her as well. They’re all the same.
Where are you?
Are you okay?
I’m worried. You never go MIA.
Just then, the screen lights up flashing BOSS LADY, and I grind my teeth. I wait for it to stop and turn the cell off completely, toss it back into the drawer, and slam it shut.
Fuck! This will complicate things.
