HADYN
The sun is setting out on the farmhouse. The temperature is cooling outside and fireflies are starting to light the dusk. Mayan music pours from the portable speakers on the deck. The haunting melody is overshadowed by loud, childish screaming.
Now that night is descending, the backyard is pure chaos.
The crowd doubled in size after lunch thanks to the kids coming home from school with their caretaker, Mrs. Hansley.
Elizabeth, Belle, Bailey and Micheal ran straight to Mama Moira the moment they smelled the food in the kitchen. I’m not sure if they were more excited to see her or the fried fish.
What followed next was a massacre. I’ve never seen small humans inhale food the way those four did. Even Belle, as young as she is, kept up.
Juniper’s here too. He came in from the airport hoping to meet with Vanya and got roped into the gathering instead. He’s currently sitting next to Kenya. They’re talking about classical literature and the importance of black representation in mainstream books.
Mom left a few hours after the kids but, shockingly, she had Will bring her back with a plastic container and a request to sneak some contraband food into dad’s ‘liquids-only’ hospital diet.
Mama Moira convinced my mom to stay a while. The two are in the lawn chairs with Mrs. Hansley. The women’s feet are propped up as they sip wine from short, stubby glasses.
The kids skate past me, screaming and laughing as they try to catch fireflies in mason jars.
Vanya catches my attention. She’s running right along with them, helping them catch the bugs. She’s wearing the hoodie I keep stashed in my car. How she looks so glamorous in my over-sized jacket is a mystery that I want to uncover—layer by layer.
Belle, Alistair’s kid, toddles over to Vanya. She pulls on the hem of Vanya’s hoodie and points to her empty glass jar.
Vanya scoops the little girl into her arms and keeps her steady as they chase fireflies. Her shout of glee when they succeed sends a jolt of electricity to my heart.
The more I see Vanya with kids, the more convinced I am that she’s going to be an amazing mother.
Damn. I want to pump her so full of me that she has all of my kids. Until we’re practically rolling around in mini-Vanyas and mini-Hadyns.
I quickly suck on an ice cube to calm myself.
“What are you going to do about the company now that your dad’s out of commission?” Max asks me.
His question summons a round of stares from the other suits.
Alistair and Darrel’s workaholic reputation precedes them. Though Darrel jumped out of the rat race and went into neuropsychology, it’s no secret that he keeps a close eye on the family fortune.
I could hand the Mulliez empire to any of these men and they’d probably enjoy growing it more than I would. Problem is, the Mulliez empire isn’t their burden to bear. It’s mine.
“I’ve been thinking about that,” I tell Max.
“That why you were so quiet during dinner?” Darrel asks. He’s got green eyes that see everything. The guy barely opens his mouth, but I get the feeling that there’s a lot he could say about everyone here.
“There must be a lot on your mind with your dad and the company.” Alistair juts his sharp chin at Vanya. “Among other things.”
I clear my throat. The last thing I want is Max, Darrel and Alistair to gang up on me. All the ladies are on Vanya’s side and since these men would do anything for their women, it doesn’t take a genius to guess that I’m on my own.
“I’m not rushing into anything,” I say.
“Don’t take too much time making up your mind.” Max lifts the beer to his lips. “Not doing anything is doing something. Most of the time, it’s the wrong something.”
“Get that off a fortune cookie?” I ask.
Max flashes me a dark look.
“Hadyn,” Hugh says, coming up to our group.
“Yes, sir?” I face Vanya’s dad, ready to do whatever he asks me.
“Sunny and Kenya were telling me about the trails at the back of the property. Want to join me for a walk?”
Oh no. I shift in discomfort. Are we going on a hike or is he planning to hack me into little pieces and bury my body where no one can find it?
Max pats me on the back and gives me a ‘good luck’ nod.
Darrel smirks.
Alistair just shakes his head.
I follow Hugh off the back of the deck and into a forest that, thankfully, is lit up with solar-powered lanterns. From the markings on the trees and the many footprints on the path, I’m guessing that Darrel, Sunny, Bailey and Micheal spend lots of time tramping through the woods.
Hugh slows his steps.
“How long have you loved Vanya?” he begins.
I was prepared for a lecture, a threat, or a warning. But I was not prepared for that.
“Love?” I wheeze, sounding like I inhaled two bottles of helium.
Hugh sticks a hand into the pocket of his pants and wanders further down the path. “If it’s not love, why are you around my daughter?”
“We’ve been friends for years.”
“You’re saying that all you feel for Vanya is friendship?”
I consider it. The truth is… I don’t obsess over whether my friends are safe and fed and happy. I don’t want to bend my friends over the nearest table and plow them from behind. I don’t get up each morning and make breakfast for my friends, follow them around all day, and go to sleep thinking of them at night.
But I don’t have a better answer for him so I say nothing.
“Vanya’s always been independent, but she was never hard-hearted.” Hugh pounds his chest. “When her mother got sick, she put on all this armor. Way more than a young lady should have at that age. She muscled her way into the world and let it knock her down over and over again until the armor fused to her skin. Until it felt like her skin. Now, she can’t tear that armor off even if she tries.”
I know exactly what he’s talking about. If Vanya gets attacked by trolls online, she’ll shrug and say ‘it’s just words’. If an interviewer or a photographer disrespects her, she’ll accept it as part of her job. If a fan goes too far and infringes on her privacy and personal space, she’ll reason that they have the right to do so.
“Anyone who doesn’t know her would assume she has no feelings.” Leaves crunch beneath Hugh’s shoes. “They think she doesn’t get hurt, she doesn’t cry, and she doesn’t long for a chance to shrug that armor off. But of course she does. The weight of it—it’s heavy, you know. It takes a lot to pretend that nothing can hurt you.”
I rub my throat, wishing I’d brought some water. Hugh hasn’t issued any threats yet, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t coming. I’m pretty sure this conversation will end with him telling me to screw off and leave his daughter alone.
“She’ll swear up and down that she’s okay, even when she’s breaking down inside,” Hugh continues.
“I see that.”
He stops under the light of a lantern. The tree nearby has a heart carved into the trunk with the initials ‘S.Q + D.H’ .
“I’ve never seen Vanya allowing someone to take care of her the way you do.”
“Allow? I think she tolerates me at best.”
“Perhaps.” He muses thoughtfully. “But it’s different for you. Your eyes follow her wherever she goes. Earlier, you saw she was cold and uncomfortable in what she was wearing and you brought her a hoodie. You told her she was drinking too much chai, but you still made a latte for her to make her happy. Juniper mentioned that you volunteered to be her assistant when he had a family emergency. You put your life on hold so she wouldn’t be alone.”
I shift from one foot to the next. This conversation sounds way more complimentary than I’d expected. I’m both on edge and a little flattered.
He gives me a side-eye. “Of course, I’m not too happy about you two sleeping together without some kind of commitment…”
I cringe. “Mr. Beckford, I’d rather not discuss my, uh, arrangement with Vanya with you.”
“Let’s discuss this then. Why is somebody like you—from a good family background, well-educated, and wealthy, not married yet?”
My eyes bug. “Sir?”
“If you take care of your friends the way you take care of Vanya, then I can’t imagine how tender you’ll be with your wife.”
I stop in my tracks.
Hugh eyes me carefully. “What do you think a wife is, Hadyn?”
“A wife is…” I think of the night I slipped a cheap ring on Vanya’s finger in front of a broadly-grinning Elvis Presley. I think of criticizing movies with Vanya on Saturday nights, her foot in my lap and popcorn spilling everywhere as we have an epic food fight. I think of her hand slipping into mine as she fought her fear of hospitals to sit beside me while my dad was sick. “She’s like your best friend, isn’t she?”
Hugh says nothing, but his eyes are locked on me.
“And I haven’t found a better friend than Vanya,” I admit. “I didn’t know what it meant to be responsible for myself, much less another person, until I moved in with her. I think about her all the time. What will make her comfortable. What will make her smile. What will make her feel protected. She’s more important to me than any other woman in my life.”
He folds his arms over his chest. “Some people would call her high maintenance.”
“Is there a level above ‘high’? I think that would suit her better.”
His lips twitch. “Are you capable of taking care of someone with so many demands?”
“I prefer a woman with demands.” My laughter is soft. “Can you imagine being with someone who has nothing to say? Someone who just caves to everything I want?” I shudder at the thought. “With someone like Vanya, life will never be boring.”
Hugh folds his arms over his chest. “Do you have a problem with her line of work? She’s a public figure. Photos of her body will be floating around the internet for life.”
I can tell by the downward tilt of his lips that he’s not okay with that.
I shrug. “I’m pretty sure there’s a clip of my body floating somewhere around the internet too.”
He frowns.
I straighten my shoulders because maybe too much honesty isn’t necessary. “My point is, I don’t have a problem with her modeling. I’ve been working with Vanya for the past few weeks and I’ve seen how professional she is on set. She’s a good model and she does good work. That’s why she’s gotten to where she is.”
“So when are you thinking of getting married?”
“We’re already—” I choke. “Sir?”
“Don’t drag your feet. I can’t count the number of male models who’ve tried to date my daughter. They’re like cockroaches.”
On that, Mr. Beckford and I totally agree.
“You have a plan to propose?” he asks. “Do you need my help?”
“Uh… about marriage… I think you need to talk to Vanya about that.”
“Dad!” Vanya scrambles toward us when we emerge from the trees. Her eyes are wide and round. Her arms are folded over her chest, causing my hoodie to rise and show off a hint of her pink silk pajama bottoms.
“What are you yelling about?” Hugh asks gruffly.
“Why did you take Hadyn into the woods?” She scowls at her father.
“What do you take me for?” Hugh turns me around roughly. “Look. See? There are no knives in his back, okay? The boy is fine.”
She gives me a scolding look. “What did you two talk about?”
“She’s so nosy,” Hugh tells me.
“You have no idea.” I agree.
Vanya glances between the two of us, her brows lowering in suspicion. “Since when did you get so chummy?”
Hugh pats my shoulder. “I’ll say my goodbyes to the Hastings and get settled in my hotel.”
“Hotel?” Vanya hauls him by the arm. “You’re not staying in a hotel.”
“Yeah.” I slide my hands around her waist and bring her back to my front. “You should stay in the guest room.”
Vanya’s quick intake of breath is far too satisfying.
Hugh makes a squeamish face. “I’d rather not sleep in your bed after this morning’s activities, Hadyn.”
Heat climbs to my ears. Right. I can see why he would feel that way.
“Then you can take mine,” Vanya offers. “That room is, um, untainted.”
I laugh into her neck.
She swats at me.
“How about this? I’ll take the couch,” Hugh agrees. “It’s only for a couple nights anyway.”
“Dad.”
“It’s either the couch or a hotel, Vanya. Take your pick.”
“Fine,” she grumbles. “You know the passcode to the front door, right?”
“Still your mother’s birthday?”
She smiles softly. “Yeah.”
When Hugh walks off, I turn Vanya around. “That’s really not a safe pass code.”
“Save your lectures for another time. Tell me what dad said.”
“None of your business.” I give her a crooked smile. “Are you ready to go home too?”
“No, Juniper and I will have a meeting at the agency.”
“You’re working late?” I frown.
“He’s been gone for a while. We have a lot to discuss.”
I stick a finger at her. “Work no later than ten.”
“What are you? My prison warden? I’m a grown woman and I’m coming home when I feel like it.”
“Eleven.”
“Forget it.”
“Twelve.”
“I’m leaving.”
“I’ll tell you where I’m keeping the emergency stash of chai,” I say coolly.
She doubles back. “I’m listening.”
“Twelve.”
“Thirty.” She smiles. “Deal.”
I resist the urge to swat her bum as she dances out of my arms and goes to find Juniper.
Mom climbs into the car as we prepare to leave Darrel and Sunny’s farmhouse.
The sound of wailing makes me turn around. Belle is on the porch steps, clinging to an exasperated Bailey’s leg.
“I don’t want to go home,” she says, releasing big, fat tears.
Kenya kneels beside her and says in a soft voice, “Belle, sweetie, you can come back and play another time.”
“No, I want to stay.”
Bailey pushes out his bottom lip and looks up at Sunny. “Mom, can you get her off me?”
Micheal looks on with a barely discernible smile on his face. He leans over to whisper something to Elizabeth. She giggles.
Bailey gives them a mutinous look. “What’s so funny?”
Belle wails louder and tightens her grip.
“Mom, let me see if I can help,” I mutter.
“You?” Mom croaks, looking shocked.
I trot up the path and join Alistair and Kenya on the porch. The exasperated parents are trying and failing to convince their daughter to leave her friends behind.
Alistair arches an eyebrow at me when I draw near to Belle.
“I’ve got this,” I tell him.
He doesn’t move.
Kenya places a hand on his arm and it’s only then that he backs off.
I crouch in front of Belle. “Hey, sweetie.” I gently take her hand and lower it so it’s not covering her face. “Do you want me to convince your parents for you?”
“Yes,” she sniffs and flashes her cute brown eyes at me.
Kenya and Alistair both stare at me as I rise to my full height.
I put my hand on Belle’s shoulder. “Guys, can you please consider leaving Belle here with Bailey and Micheal forever?”
“Forever?” Belle jolts and tips her chin up.
“Isn’t that what you want?” I crouch in front of her again.
She shakes her head as fresh tears crop in her eyes. “I just… don’t want… to go.”
“But if you go, then guess what?” I lean closer and whisper, “You get to come back and have even more fun. But if you stay and stay and stay forever, then it’ll get boring.”
“No, it won’t,” Belle argues.
She’s Alistair’s kid for sure. Stubborn like her father.
I give Alistair a dirty look for creating such a strong-willed offspring and then I look at Belle again. “When I was little, I had best friends too. And I didn’t want them to ever leave. But you know what happens when you let best friends leave?”
“What?”
“They come back. And it’s the best feeling in the world. Don’t you want to feel that?”
She thinks about it and then nods.
“Then let go of Bailey’s leg and say bye-bye.”
Belle bats her hair out of her face and slowly removes her arms from Bailey. The boy jumps back so fast his glasses almost fly off his nose. He runs straight to Elizabeth, who’s on the sidelines, and leans into her, mumbling for her to stop laughing.
Kenya takes Belle’s hand. “You’re good at that, Hadyn.”
“Because he’s a kid himself,” Max mutters.
I scowl at him.
He tries to glare back, but the intimidating stare is broken by a small smile.
“Beth, time to go,” Dawn calls for her daughter.
“Okay.” Elizabeth waves at Micheal who waves back with a soft expression. She turns to Bailey and waves next. Bailey grins and fixes his glasses on his nose.
Max opens his arms and Beth runs into them, allowing him to lift her and carry her to the car.
I say my goodbyes to everyone all over again and return to mom.
She gives me an astonished look. “What was that?”
“What was what?” I ask, putting on my seatbelt as Will starts the car.
“Since when were you so good with kids?”
Since I learned I was going to have one. “I’m naturally good at everything, mom. You should know this by now.”
“You’re naturally good at getting on my nerves.”
I hide my grin by biting the inside of my cheek. “I try my best.”
She humphs. “Now that we have a minute, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about your dad’s seizure.”
I freeze.
Mom continues, “He said it had nothing to do with the discussion you two had. Is that true?”
A thick guilt coats my skin. I didn’t mean to hurt dad today. Watching him go into shock scared the hell out of me, but it doesn’t change how conflicted I feel.
I’m still wrestling with everything he told me. Who am I supposed to blame if not my father? Where am I supposed to put all my guilt, shame and anger now?
Mom lowers her voice. “Did you talk about Ollie?”
All the air gets sucked out of the car. I inch over to the window and wind it down. The breeze ruffles my hair and carries the fragrance of rain.
Mom lifts a delicate hand and squeezes her seatbelt like a stress ball. “Both you and your father handled Ollie’s death in different ways. Right after the funeral, your father walked back and forth in front of Ollie’s room like a ghost. He’d go in and touch things and then put them back. Over and over again.”
I glance down.
I don’t want to feel sorry for dad right now. I don’t want to think that my grief and his are the same.
“No one understands the love a parent has for their child. Not until they become parents themselves.”
My eyes stray to the night sky. Project Vegas is still just a blip on a screen, but I understand what mom is saying. Even though I haven’t held our baby yet, I adore him or her already.
“Sometimes, it shocked us to remember that Ollie wasn’t our biological son,” Mom admits. “He was so brilliant, so loving. Your father saw the potential in Ollie to be great. And he was.” Her voice breaks. “He wasn’t my flesh and blood, but he was the child of my heart.”
The backs of my eyes are burning. I push my face closer to the window so the wind can keep the tears at bay.
“After we lost him, your dad wanted to burn the company to the ground. He was so grieved. But he thought of you and of your future children. He thought of all the hard work Ollie had done to leave a legacy for you. So your dad kept it going. He kept the race track open. He sponsored more teams. He branched further and further into your world because he wanted you to know that there was a place for you. Just like there was a place for Ollie.”
I cover my face with a hand. My shoulders shake with silent sobs.
Mom squeezes my arm. “Your father isn’t a perfect man, Hadyn. Not by a long shot. He’s made mistakes. More than a fair share. But I can tell you one thing—your father loves his sons. Both of them. And all he wants is to give them something they can be proud of.”
I gather myself and face her with red eyes. “Yeah, well, sometimes dad’s form of ‘giving’ is more like cramming it down your throat.”
“I said he was imperfect, didn’t I?” She rubs my back and goes quiet.
“Mom?”
“Mm.”
“Why did Ollie spend the last of his days at the company?” I press my hands flat into my thighs. “He gave up everything for it, but the company didn’t change when he was gone. It’s still running. It’s doing better. Someone replaced him as soon as he got put in the ground. He couldn’t take the money, the awards, the accolades—he didn’t carry any of it with him. Why did it matter?”
She purses her lips in thought. “I don’t think it was about the money or the accolades. I think he loved what he was doing.” She smiles at me. “And when you do the work you’re passionate about, the work you were created to do, then when you die, you die empty and fulfilled.”
I swallow past the lump in my throat. For most of my life, I didn’t think seriously about my legacy or my future. I didn’t think or feel at all.
But Ollie gambled the last of his days on earth on something he loved.
I don’t know if I’m strong enough to do the same.
Mom climbs out in front of the hospital and stares expectantly at me. “Aren’t you coming?”
“Tell dad I’ll visit him later.”
Disappointment crushes her features. “Hadyn.”
I feel a twinge of regret, but I don’t give into her pleading tone. The last time we spoke, dad had a seizure. We butt heads too often for me to see him in this state. It’s just not safe.
Will drives off. “Where to, Master Hadyn?”
I drum my fingers on my knee. “Take me to the company.”
The nameplate on the desk says Oliver Mulliez Jr. I had no idea dad preserved Ollie’s office. If I’d stopped by the company to do more than yell and fight with dad, maybe I would have found out sooner.
Ollie’s chair is one of those fussy, high-back chairs with the padded centers. My brother was always complaining about his back. I would tease him and tell him he was an old man. He would smile and tell me ‘wait a few years’.
I slide my hands over the magnificent mahogany desk. It’s way too big for me. These shoes are too big for me to fill.
What are you going to do now that your dad’s in the hospital?
Both my father and my brother gave their lives to these offices. They voluntarily hung nooses around their necks in the form of suits and ties. They willingly carried the weight of thousands of workers and their families on their shoulders.
I rise from the desk and glance around at Ollie’s untouched things. Everything in here is clean. Not a hint of dust. As if dad oversees the tidying of the office himself.
So much wasted potential.
So much quiet loss.
“I don’t know if I can be you, Ollie,” I whisper. “You were more of a Mulliez than I was.”
There’s no answer.
Not that I expected one.
When the silence gets too loud for me, I leave the company and wait for Vanya outside of her agency.
It’s twelve-thirty on the dot when she walks out with Juniper. They’re talking and smiling. I’d be jealous if I didn’t know that Juniper was happily in a long-term relationship.
Vanya stops in the middle of the sidewalk when she sees me leaning against the pickup truck I stole from my garage. With dad in the hospital, there’s no one to stop me. And the car is mine anyway.
Vanya brightens and hurries toward me. I give her a greedy once-over. She must have had some spare clothes at the modeling agency because she’s changed out of her pajamas. She’s wearing my hoodie over a fancy blouse and jeans. The jeans look spraypainted on and I can’t help staring.
“Hey.”
She hurries up to me. “Hey.”
Juniper lifts a hand. “You newlyweds have a good night.”
“Ignore him,” Vanya mutters.
“Why should I ignore him. He’s right. We are technically newlyweds.”
“And you are, technically, stalking me,” she says. “Why aren’t you at home?”
I slide my hands around her waist and pull her into me. Her body melts against mine and I can’t help thinking she was made for this. She was made for me.
“I waited for hours and this is how you’re going to treat me?” I murmur against her neck.
“No one asked you to do that,” she answers sassily.
“Smart mouth,” I say, tipping her chin up and showing her another, more pleasurable activity that involves her sharp tongue.
She eases back, a conflicted look in her eyes. “Hadyn.”
“Ah-ah. It’s late.”
“I’m aware of the time.”
“Do you want to go home?”
“Is there another option?” she asks, rubbing her forehead. “After talking business with Juniper, my brain’s turned to mush. I could use some fresh air and chai.”
“No chance on the chai. How many glasses of water have you had today?”
She scowls at me. “You’re no fun.”
“You want fun? I’ll show you fun.” I escort her into the car and drive a couple miles outside of the city.
She glances around at the tall brush. “You’re not going to kill me out here, are you? Because Juniper saw me get into the car with you. I have witnesses.”
“I can buy him off,” I tell her, chuckling.
She gives me a don’t joke like that look.
When we get far enough, I park the truck and run around to Vanya’s side. She makes a startled sound when I kiss her firmly on the mouth, undo her seatbelt and swing her around in my arms.
She wraps her hands around my neck. “I will never get used to you carrying me.”
“Get used to it, sweetheart. You deserve it and more.”
She gives me a suspicious look. “Are you okay?”
“Max took Dawn out here the first time he told her he loved her. I’m taking a page out of his book.”
She wrinkles her nose. “Are you going to do a cheesy confession here too?”
“Well, not anymore.”
She gets that uncomfortable look again. “Hadyn.”
“Here. Let me help you into the back of the pickup,” I say, interrupting her before she can utter anything ridiculous.
The bed of the car dips as we both hop on. I spread out a comforter and set the blanket on top of it.
Vanya sniffs the fabric. “Is this clean?”
“Never been used. Don’t worry. I don’t do romantic crap like this with other girls.”
“This is supposed to be romantic?” She smirks at me.
“I’d take you to a nice restaurant and show off my money, but the restaurants are closed.”
“And you don’t have any money,” she reminds me.
Hell. She’s always got something to say.
“Lie down and look at the stars, Vanya. Geez.” I pat the space next to me.
She lies flat, her shoulder brushing mine.
With no buildings blocking our view, it’s just us, tall grass and nothing but stars. The moment reminds me of my backpacking trip to Europe. Except I’m not high and Vanya’s not some nameless chick I picked up in a bar somewhere.
Her hand closes over mine. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I lie.
She rolls over and props her head up. Now, her chest is in my face and it’s pretty freaking hard to focus on whatever emotionally vulnerable moment she’s trying to create here.
“You’ve been upset since I saw you at dinner. And you had that same expression when you were waiting outside my agency.”
“Maybe I just missed you.”
“Or maybe you’re running from whatever’s on your mind.”
“Either way, the only one I want to be with right now is you.”
Her mouth snaps shut. She stares at me with wide eyes.
Slowly, carefully, I lean over and kiss her. She kisses me back, her hands skating over my shoulders and running through my hair. The taste of her is so sweet that I’m instantly hooked.
Using my momentum, I roll Vanya over me until her center is poised right where it’s supposed to be.
We both moan as our hips brush.
Damn, she’s gorgeous.
My desire for her is almost too much for me to handle. I let my hands be greedy. Let my lips plunder instead of savor.
She meets my passion with her own, setting off tiny explosions that detonate all over my body.
I love the weight of her on top of me. Love the way my fingers skate over her thighs. Love the feel of her breath on my skin and those little sounds that are somewhere between a whimper and a moan.
“Is this why you brought me here?” Her mouth is wet and parted. Her eyes are heavy lidded. “So we can fool around in the dark?”
I hook my fingers over the zipper of her jeans and push her up so she can roll them down her legs. “Sweetheart, I plan to do a lot more than fool around.”
She opens her mouth to say more, but I brush my fingers over her until the only word that leaves her lips is my name.
“I need you,” I whisper in her ear before dragging my jeans down.
She kisses my lips as she sinks into me. It’s different this time. Slower. Sweeter. Like she understands. Like she wants to give me everything I need.
Sex has always been a meaningless act to me. I give satisfaction. I take my own rewards and then I leave it all behind.
But that night, with Vanya, it’s not just my body that collides with hers. It’s my heart. It’s my mind. It’s my everything.
The truck bed creaks with every movement.
The stars hurry to hide behind the clouds.
I dive deep into Vanya as if I’ll never reach the end of her. And then I do and it’s glorious.
“Hold on,” I warn her.
She digs her fingers into my shoulder as I take control.
It’s too much.
Too…
When pleasure rips both our souls from our bodies, I tumble straight off the edge of a cliff. The falling is unlike anything I’ve experienced. I feel torn apart. Over-charged. Empty and full at the same time. Drowning in something I don’t recognize. Something that scares the crap out of me.
And it’s only when Vanya goes limp on top of me, her body coated in sweat and the essence of us, that I realize what that something is.
My eyes flip open like cartoon windows.
Holy crap.
I’m in love with Vanya.
I’m in love with my wife.
