Floating.
I quested out, searching as I had before. Like on other nights, I didn’t find anything. I was nearly pulled down by my own tiredness again.
But no. No, I was Defiant. Plus, I was better with my powers than I’d ever been. I was stronger than sleep, stronger than my own worst instincts. Strong enough to…
Push through. I latched onto the familiar sensation of Jorgen’s mind and pulled myself toward it.
This time I interrupted him shaving.
He jumped as he saw me suddenly reflected in his mirror, standing beside him in the lavish bathroom. It had two sinks. He was wearing a towel, fortunately, but I do have to say…boy took care of himself. Mandatory PT for pilots didn’t give a fellow pecs like that, not without some extra reps at the gym.
“Spin!” he snapped. “This is not a good time.”
“Oh, and last time was better?” I said, folding my arms and refusing to be embarrassed. “At least you’re not getting shot at.”
He reached for his towel to wipe away the shaving suds covering half his face, then—wisely—stopped. Finally, he took a deep breath. “Sorry,” he said, “I didn’t mean to snap at you. You certainly couldn’t have known you’d find me in a compromising position.”
“Huh,” I said. “How do you do that?”
“What?”
“Stay calm,” I said. “Be so understanding.”
“Command training.”
“Bull,” I said. “I know your secret, Jorgen Weight. You’re a good person.”
“That’s…a secret?”
“Hush,” I said. “I have to say things like that or I’ll look like an idiot for taking so long to figure it out. It would help me out a ton if you’d at least pretend to be an actual jerkface now and then.”
“I’ll work on that,” he said, smiling.
I stepped forward, then edged around him so I could stand between him and the sink. He could only see me in the reflection, so if I stood there—facing the mirror—our height difference meant we could look each other in the eyes. He stepped back to give me room. Saints, that smile was adorable with half his face shaved. Even the tiny scabs from his healing cuts were adorable, in a grizzled warrior kind of way.
I, however, was anything but adorable. I’d never been one to fret over my appearance—even when I tried during my school days, kids used to joke that I looked like a rodent. They felt so brilliant realizing that the rat girl was a bit mousy.
That said, scud. “I need to find a hairbrush, don’t I?” I said. “And a shower. Or seven.”
“You look just fine.”
“Ah, ‘just fine.’ Exactly what a woman loves to hear.”
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I meant to say that you look like a barbarian who just finished killing her seventeenth rabid tiger to make a necklace out of their incisors.”
“Really?” I said, tearing up. I mean, it was silly but…you know, he was trying.
“It’s like you came strolling directly out of a barbarian story,” he said. “Except for the jumpsuit.”
“I can fix that,” I said, reaching for the zipper.
The way his eyes bulged was totally worth it. But he looked so uncomfortable that I spun around to face him, raising my hands. “Joking! I’m joking, Jorgen. Don’t faint or anything!”
He shook his head, reaching for a washcloth to wipe the suds from his face. That left his face half-covered with black stubble, which would have been sexy, except…you know, the fact that it was only half the face. I turned back around toward the mirror.
“What happened to your face anyway?” I asked.
Jorgen grimaced. “I squeezed a slug. It didn’t appreciate it and let me know.”
I wanted more details, but I knew our time was short so I didn’t press him.
“I lied earlier, Spensa,” he said. “Command training did not prepare me for you. Nothing could have done that. Anyway, I suppose I should ask for a report.”
“Days passed?” I asked him.
“Since our last visit? Five.”
Yeah, time was odd in the nowhere. I thought it had only been three for me, but I couldn’t tell for certain. “I’ve made progress on my quest,” I explained. “I’ll tell you about that in a minute, but first I have more important intel. Jorgen…I think the Superiority leaders are trying to make a deal with the delvers. An alliance.”
He blinked, then took a deep breath. “That’s unfortunate.”
“That’s all you can say?”
“I was taught not to curse in front of a lady.”
“Good thing there are none of those here, eh?”
He smiled. “You say you think they’ll make a deal. They haven’t yet?”
“Not that I know,” I said. “But the delvers were intrigued by what Winzik said. And judging by what I’ve felt from them…I think it will happen. Unless we find a way to stop it.”
“I’ll report this to Cobb and the command staff,” he said. “It confirms our worst fears, that the delver summoning wasn’t an anomaly—but an appetizer. Anything else?”
“I found a kind of heritage site,” I said. “It’s hard to explain, but I saw some of the history of cytonics, and was taught a little how to better use my abilities. Jorgen, I’m pretty sure we were made when the nowhere leaked into our reality and changed people living nearby.”
“Changed?”
“Think of it like a mutation,” I said. “Caused by specialized radiation seeping through weak spots between dimensions. It means we’re not freaks. We’re mutations.”
“Well,” he said, rubbing his chin in thought. “Though I don’t like the word ‘freak,’ many would call a mutation exactly the sort of thing that makes you one. Certainly, a ‘defect’ could be caused by a mutation. So I’m not sure what you’re saying.”
“I’m saying that we’re not some kind of sleeper agent for the delvers,” I said. “We predate them, in fact. What’s happened is that cytonics have blended with the nowhere—giving us access to it, letting us bend our reality to work the way it does.”
He nodded slowly. “If what you say is true, then we could potentially make more cytonic people.”
“There’s a portal,” I said, “on Detritus, in the tunnels near Igneous. Search northeast of the cavern, near some old pipes in a place with some strange patterns carved in the stone. You might want to study it.”
“I’ll put some people on it,” he said.
“Be careful,” I noted. “A cytonic can fall through and get stuck in here—and it’s hard to get out. So don’t, you know, pull a Spensa.”
“Will do,” he said, meeting my eyes in the reflection. “This is important. I’m glad you stayed, even if it means…well, this.” He gestured at my ghostly state.
“I’m going to continue on the Path,” I said. “First I have to deal with a bunch of pirates though.”
“There are pirates in the nowhere?” he asked.
“Yeah. Awesome, isn’t it?”
“I thought the place was…well…nothingness.”
“Kind of is, kind of isn’t?” I said. “It’s complicated. I’m going to steal a starfighter tomorrow, which should let me get to the next memory dump.”
He backed up to lean against the wall, his arms folded, thoughtful. And for the first time I noticed how tired he looked. It was tough to tell with Jorgen, who always seemed so upright and solid—his dark brown skin making it harder to make out signs of fatigue like bags under his eyes.
“Jorgen?” I said. “You all right?”
“Things are tense here. We’ve found a way to protect ourselves—the planet’s defenses are fully online, thanks to Rig and the engineers.”
“Well, that’s good. You’re safe.”
“Too safe,” he said. “The galaxy is collapsing under the control of a tyrant while we’re hiding. I know we barely started playing on the galactic stage, but it feels wrong to hide. We should be doing something.” He grimaced. “It’s politics, Spensa. You would be indignant if you were here.”
“You can be indignant on my behalf.”
“I’m trying,” he said. “But you know how my parents are. I love them, Spensa, but…they’re partially responsible. They would have us keep hiding, hoping the enemy will just leave us alone. I know that will never happen. I knew it before you told me about what’s happening with the delvers.”
“Maybe my news will be enough to get them to listen.”
“Maybe,” he said, sounding entirely unconvinced.
I glanced around at the decor. I’d noticed that this wasn’t some standard DDF bunkhouse latrine, but now I saw more. Was that gold on the trim? White marble?
“You’re home,” I guessed. “Trying to persuade your parents?”
“I thought maybe they’d listen if I could talk to them outside a formal context. I should have known—they’ve arranged four dinners for me, all with eligible young women from the lower caverns.”
The rich caverns, he meant. The ones best protected from surface attacks. “Good thing I’m not the jealous type,” I said.
“Kind of wish you were,” he said. “If you’d swing by and decapitate one or two of them, maybe the others would give up.”
“Jorgen, please,” I said. “Decapitation is reserved for worthy enemies on the battlefield.”
This coaxed a full-on smile from him. He walked back up to me, and though we couldn’t touch, I could feel his mind behind me—and I successfully resisted the urge to probe his mind with my new talents. We stood there, looking, feeling, for a short time. Because it was all we had.
“You know,” I finally said, “I’m a little surprised to find out you don’t shower in your uniform. I half figured there was some outdated rule that required you to wear it at all times, or suffer one sixteenth of a demerit.”
“Wait until someone hears that I had a girl in the bathroom with me,” he said.
“I’m sure invisible girls don’t count,” I said, and felt myself start to fade. “Take care of yourself, Jorgen.”
“Same to you,” he said. “Consider it an order.”
I nodded, reaching for him. I felt like I got an armful of something—something that was him—as it all vanished and I was dumped back into the nowhere. His essence, like his scent, lingered—as did the picture of him in my head, half-shaven, weary.
Still, this was a success. I’d been able to find him again, and I was more confident in my powers. So confident, in fact, that I did something that might have been stupid. I went looking for the delvers.
Last time I’d dreamed like this, I’d overheard them engaging in an important conversation. Could I do that again? I quested outward, trying to capture the same…sensation as last time. The same location? It was wrong to think of anything in this place as having locations. It was more like frequencies or—
Something slammed into my mind.
It was you! Brade said. You were watching before. I told Winzik, but he didn’t believe me!
I tried to pull away, but she was better trained than I was. And she seemed to have some kind of ability to hold on to my mind in a way I’d never experienced before. I was like a fly in a web, buzzing about but held tight by Brade’s own mind.
I knew you were alive, she said. You did escape into the nowhere, didn’t you? Little cricket, sneaking about.
Brade, I responded. You don’t have to be like this. You don’t have to—
Of course I don’t, she said. You know what I hate most about you, Alanik? It’s that you aren’t willing to admit, even for the shortest moment, that I’m capable of making my own decisions. To you, I’m merely a misguided dupe.
Winzik is going to kill all the cytonics, I said. That’s the promise he made to the delvers. You know that. You’re the one who communicated the offer!
In response, she laughed. She either didn’t care or had some plan I didn’t understand. And…with my improving senses, I could feel a little more. That to her, my complaints were simplistic. Perhaps insultingly so.
She tried to rip my mind apart. But there was one thing I’d learned by sticking up for myself in the past: bullies expect you to fold.
I leaned into the fight. I didn’t whimper, or curl up, or back away. I threw myself at Brade with everything I had. Though I was formless, just a collection of thoughts, our minds could clash. Like two bursts of light throwing sparks. Two stars meeting.
She was trained. But I was ferocious.
Brade broke first, then fled, leaving me exhausted as I slowly faded into proper dreams, highlighted by half-shaven officers and epic journeys on sailing ships pulled by dragons.
