Kekoa wanders into my office the morning after a somewhat big and precarious night. Magnolia’s at work, left even though I tried to convince her to not. Don’t know why I tried to convince her not to. It’s been a couple of weeks now, that grace period of post-have infatuation should be wrapping up. Not sure it is quite yet though.
Koa sits down in the chair at my desk opposite me, nods his chin at me.
“Did you let that little girl tell you what to do last night?”
Grind my jaw, annoyed. Two reasons. Little girl? He’s a little prick. And also, just fuck off.
“Nah. I mean—” I scoff. “Just because she’s such a fucking pain that otherwise I’d never hear the end of it—”
That particular reason doesn’t move Kekoa at all. Doesn’t bat an eye.
“So?”
I give him a look. “So then I’d never hear the end of it…”
He shrugs. “Then just give her the flick—”
And then I make a weird noise. Half scoff, half laugh, 100% incoherent, non-English garble. In response to my old friend telling me to give Magnolia Parks the flick, were I to type it, I reckon what I said was: Hkdfvvrt.
Kekoa’s face pulls back, surprised. “Wow.”
“What?” I frown defensively.
“Wow!” He’s grinning now.
I shake my head at him, roll my eyes. “Stop.”
“This is big—” Koa nods to himself.
“What’s big?” Declan asks as he flops on my carved and yellow upholstered chaise lounge from the Regency era. Got delivered yesterday and the only thing I’ve thought about is doing Magnolia on it.
Decks on it now sort of maims that image out of my head. Probably good though in light of all this fucking shit.
“No, it’s not big—” Keep shaking my head. “It’s nothing. She’s nothing.”
“Who’s nothing?” Decks asks and I ignore him.
“Right.” Koa nods, folding his arms over his chest.
I give him a look, eyebrows up. “Right.”
Kekoa leans back in his chair. “What are you doing later? Want to get dinner later at Connaught? I feel like that fig and prosciutto pizza.”
“I’d get in on that.” Declan sits up.
“Nah, I can’t,” I tell him. “I’m taking Parks to—” His eyebrows shoot up, amused. “Nowhere. Never mind. Taking her nowhere. Dinner sounds good.”
Doesn’t sound that good if I’m honest, but I agree to it because he’s going to be a thorn in my fucking side otherwise, he and Decks won’t let me hear the end of it because honestly, I did let that little girl tell me what to do last night and I have no fucking idea why. I was shitty at her, if I’m honest.
When we got to Jonah’s club, she and Ballentine drifted over to each other how they always do. I gave them space for a bit but after a minute it just annoyed me.
It’s weird, a couple of weeks ago Ballentine and I were friends. Technically still are, I’spose. Except now I think he’s a fucking pain in the arse.
You look at this through the lens of Magnolia — and admittedly, all my lenses are a bit Magnolia-heavy these days — but no matter which way I look at Ballentine at the minute, either he’s the lad that the girl I’m naffing keeps running off to see or he’s the thing who hurt the person I’m spending all my time with. Can’t say I’m that keen on him either way. But me and Parks, we aren’t dating, I know what I’m here for — so I gave them a minute when we walked in. Tell her I see a mate of mine, which I did, and she was straight over to Ballentine like she does.
Touched his shirt, he smiled at her like his girlfriend wasn’t right there next to him.
After a few minutes of it I got bored of talking to my mate, barely talked to him anyway, spent the majority of the conversation craning my neck to watch Magnolia and trying to eavesdrop and it was when I think I heard her say “and then I came” that I decided to poke my head into the conversation.
“Are my ears burning, Tiges?” I flicked her a look and Ballentine rolled his eyes, so I reached for Magnolia, pulled her up off Taura’s lap and over onto mine. Don’t know why I did that, just felt like touching her so I hooked my arm around her neck, held her against my body as I stared Ballentine down.
“Maybe.” Magnolia batted her eyes up at me.
I nodded my chin at BJ. “You don’t look too happy, mate. Knickers in a bunch?”
Magnolia pinched my arm, gave me a glare she didn’t mean. “Be nice.”
I pressed my mouth against her ear and said loud enough for BJ to hear. “That’s not what you said last night—”
“Okay—” Ballentine rolled his eyes. “We get it, you guys had sex—”
My head pulled back a little. “Are you talking to me?”
And then Ballentine squared up. “Yeah, I am.”
Parks tensed up in my body, so I dropped my chin on top of her head to let her know I was still in control. Also to annoy Ballentine, but that was just a nice aside.
“If you’ve got something to say, big man, say it—”
And then he nodded his head towards the street. “Do you want to take this outside?”
Magnolia shook her head quickly. “BJ—”
I pressed my tongue into my bottom lip. “Love to.”
Magnolia spun around in my arms, put her little hand on my chest like that could actually stop shit.
“Julian,” she said, calmly.
“Woah, woah—” Jo jogged over. “What’s going on?”
He let out a nervous laugh, looked from me to his other best friend.
BJ shrugged, waiting for me . “Go on—”
“Beej—” She whipped her head around at him, scowling, and I could tell she was scared. She should be. I’ve killed people for less. I pointed over at him.
“You better check your boy, Jo. That didn’t not sound like a threat.” I didn’t break eye contact with Ballentine as I smirked over at him.
And then BJ cocked a smile, shrugged like he had a death wish.
“You know what, I think you’re all talk, man—”
“BJ—” Magnolia whispered quietly. I could hear the fear rising in her.
“Do you?” I nodded my chin over at him, a bit amused. “Are you willing to stake your life on that?”
“Easy—” She spun back to face me, that hand back on my chest and another held my face so she could angle me how she wanted to.
I didn’t mind the touching… I’d pick fights with that idiot all day if it meant she’d body block me how she was.
“Look at me—” She gave me a look. “In no world, do you understand?”
My jaw went tight at being told what to do, maybe a bit because it shitted me that she was protecting him. He needed it.
Jo came up behind me, drummed his hands on my shoulders. “Oi— bro, let’s go to my office—” Jo nodded in its direction then pointed over at Ballentine. “And you, pull your fucking head in, you git.”
I looked down at Parks.
She doesn’t like drugs. I could tell when she saw me doing some coke the other day. I was at my desk and it was the middle of the day. She walked in, sort of froze in her tracks. Like it scared her or something. Bit weird.
“You mind?” I asked her, nodding my head toward Jonah. I don’t know why I asked — why the fuck did I ask? I don’t give a shit if she minds, but then, do I?
She did mind, I could see it on her face, but I decided I’d do it anyway because I do what I want.
I held her by the waist and kissed her heavily just to prove a point to Ballentine, and a bit because I didn’t want her to be too shitty at me for it. “Be back soon.”
I followed Jo there, and he sat in the chair behind his desk and reclined.
“Sorry.” He sighed, shaking his head. “He’s a fucking wanker with her.”
I nodded and sat down across from him. Jo pulled out a little crystal jar.
“How’s it going with you two?” he asked.
“Me and Parks?”
He scooped a little out as he nodded, shaping it into a little line.
“Good—” I shrugged. Regretted that immediately, made it sound like I give a fuck. “Fine.”
He looked over at me as he cut it up. “You’ve been spending a bit of time together…”
I shrugged again.
“Yeah, I guess. She just won’t leave,” I lied as he passed me the straw. His eyes pinched at that, and I wondered for a second if he already knew that I’d been the main instigator in her not leaving. That she says she’s going to go and do something and I say she can just do it at the house, pull an embarrassing amount of strings to make it be true.
“That right?” He nodded slowly and I felt like a twit. I took the line. I pinched my nose and nodded. “That’s good. Where’s it from?”
“Peru.” He sniffed.
Jo sat back in his chair, arms behind his head, watching me for a second.
“She’s not good with boundaries, you know.”
I flashed him a look. “We’re having sex, Hemmes… What sort of boundaries do you want her to have?”
“She doesn’t know how to be alone.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Never has.”
I shrugged. “Worse things—”
“Yeah.” He nodded again. “Be careful.”
I scoffed. “Of?”
“Her.” He shrugged as he put the jar back in the drawer.
“Yeah.” I chuckled, rolled my eyes. “Right, she’s a real little terror.”
“I’m serious, Jules—” He gave me a look and I gave him one back. “She’ll pull you in til she makes you fall in love with her and — and you know what—” He shrugged. “She might even fall in love with you too but not how she loves him.”
I tossed him an unimpressed look and pushed back from the table.
Don’t know why that annoyed me but it did.
Headed back in to the club to find her. Felt like I was proving something but I couldn’t figure out what.
And then I saw her at the bar with him, standing so close their arms were touching and I don’t know why my skin pricked, but it did.
I watched her watch him. My jaw tightened, brows dropped. Fuck her, I thought. Fuck her for looking at him like that. I don’t know why, but fuck her.
I looked around the room and spotted a girl I’ve hooked up with before pretty quick. She had, like, peach-coloured hair or some shit. Bit too plastic for my personal preference, wore too much of that shiny makeup girls love to wear so they look sweaty or sparkly or some shit. Didn’t really care though. Just wanted to feel up another body, prove Jonah wrong because I knew I wasn’t falling for her — and maybe piss off Magnolia in the process.
“Hey.” I ducked into the eye-line of the girl. Chelsea, I think her name was.
“Hi—” Her eyes went a bit wide.
“Remember me?”
She nodded, swallowed.
I slipped my arm around her waist. “I remember you.”
I pulled her over towards where Decks and a few of the other boys were sitting, joined them, then pulled her down onto my lap.
Quickest way to get a girl to lean into you? Hand on her lower back. Girls fucking love it. Turns them to mush.
Chatted with Chelsea for a minute, reacquainted myself with her a bit because I’m not a fucking heathen, asked her how she did on that exam she had the morning after the night we hooked up (not well) and then I told her I liked what she did with her hair — I’m telling you, remember one thing, notice one thing and hand on her lower back and boys, you’re in.
Don’t know how long I’d been feeling Chelsea up on the sofa before Decks started elbowing me like a fucking maniac, and I looked over at him, annoyed before I saw these little hands on hips in front of me and I glanced up at a fucking pissed Magnolia Parks.
In a split-second move, I decided that being apathetic would piss her off more and I was happy that she was angry.
“Oh.” I gave her a bleary smile. “Hey.”
“Oh, hey?” she repeated back.
I blinked once and her eyes went to slits.
“Alright look, I don’t care what you do when I’m not here, which is this, I presume—”
I scoffed and looked away and she ducked her head a little, eyebrows up waiting for me to give her my attention, which I did. Can’t not with that face.
“I’m not done talking.” She shook her head and my head pulled back, surprised and amused.
“You want to feel up random girls who are substantially less attractive than I am? That’s your prerogative. But when I’m in the same room as you, I am all you see.”
Probably never wanted her more than I did in that moment. Played it cool though.
“Is that right?” I asked her like I was bored.
“That’s right.”
I nodded my chin at her. “Or what?”
“Or we’re done.” She shrugged too easily and I know my face faltered and I know she saw it. “Which is fine with me, by the way. You’ve wanted me for — hmm…” She pretended to think about it and glanced over at Kekoa. “What would you say, Kekoa — four or so years?”
Koa was biting back a smile, gave her a little nod. “Reckon it’s more like five.”
Thought about firing him for that.
“You’ve wanted me for five years and I’ve sort of wanted you maybe for, like, three and a half weeks, so really, it’s no skin off my back…”
I pressed my tongue into the side of my cheek. The fucking mouth on this girl — unbelievable.
“So.” She tapped her little impatient foot. “What’s it going to be?”
I held her eyes, trying to make her look away first, but she didn’t. It was a power struggle and I was losing.
Licked my bottom lip, shook my head and shrugged. “You heard the boss—”
The other girl sort of tumbled off my lap onto the couch as I stood up and stepped towards Magnolia, slipping my arms around her waist.
She gave me a defiant look, chin in the air. “Don’t you do that again.”
“Fuck, you’re demanding…”
“Oh, you have no idea… But you’re about to—” She gave me a tight smile as she nodded towards the door. “Let’s go. You’re going to take me home and put me to bed.”
I gripped her a bit tighter, knocked her chin up with my index finger so her eyes were on me. “Am I?”
She swallowed once, finally got a look on her face like she remembered who she was talking to.
“You are,” she said anyway, trying to sound brave.
Tilt my head as I stare down at her. “In what way am I putting you to bed?”
“Surprise me.” She said, indifferent.
I took her hand and pulled her downstairs to my car, lifted her up into it.
She kicked off her shoes and tucked her feet under her legs.
“You know it’s a two way street, Tiges,” I told the window a few minutes into the drive because if I knew it I looked at her, I’d get distracted.
“What is?” She looked for my eyes that I wouldn’t give her.
“If you’re all I see, I’m all you see—”
“Fine.” She shrugged, shifting away from me, arms crossed over her chest all huffy, and I wondered if we were having our first fight.
Why would we be having our first fight though? We’re not — whatever—
“Is it?” I kept poking, because I felt like it. “You over at the bar with your fucking mate—”
She let out a puff of air all indignant. “If you think you and I were doing the same things, we’re in trouble—”
I gave her a tight smile and an indifferent shrug, “Lucky there is no we then, ey—”
Those eyebrows shot up again. “Isn’t there?”
Stared her down. “Just fucking.”
Her face crumpled, confused. “Who is?”
“We are—?” I frowned, a bit annoyed.
She looked over at me slowly, placing her hands demurely in her lap as she gave me this fucking smug smile, blinking until it landed.
I sniffed, roll my eyes, ran my tongue over my teeth, tried to look like I was over her shit, but you know what? I’m knee deep in it. Might wade a little further in, actually…
A couple of hours later, Magnolia bounces into my office.
Kekoa looks up from his phone, glances from her over to me, barely containing his smirk.
“Hi.” She skips over to me, plants herself on my lap.
My eyes wander down her face and I feel happy to see her, find my hands make their way to her waist without a second thought.
“Hey.” I give her a confused look. “What are you doing here?”
She mirrors my face. “You’re taking me to Le Gavroche, remember?”
I see from the corner of my eye Koa sitting up straighter, peeking over, that nosy bastard.
“Oh fuck—” I sigh. “I forgot to call you. I can’t do dinner.”
“Oh,” she says and her face falls, like I’ve disappointed her, and for some reason my heart drops a foot in my chest.
“Oh, okay. That’s fine—” She forces a smile and she bunches up a bit how she does when she feels exposed.
“Sorry—” I shake my head. “I just—”
“No, you’re fine!” She stands up quickly, and she physically removes my grip from her waist.
I stare down at my hands that she just displaced from her body and I get this strange flash through me of how much I hate not touching her. Why do I hate not touching her? Her cheeks are going pink so her eyes are getting brighter and I’m fucked because what am I going to do—? Say no to that face?
“Nah, fuck it—” I swipe my hand through the air. “I’ll make it work—” I tell her.
“Will you?” Kekoa asks, licking his bottom lip and pocketing his phone.
“No—” Magnolia shakes her head, waving her hands around. “It’s okay, I know you’re busy. You have a—” She stalls, confused. “Well, am I correct in assuming it’s a somewhat illegitimate business that you run?”
Koa starts laughing and I squash a smile.
“I’ll go—” She turns and heads towards the door but I grab her hand.
“No you won’t,” I tell her, ignoring Koa, who’s on his feet now, arms crossed, eyebrows fucking tall to really drive home his point.
I pull her back over towards me, put my hands back on her waist where I want them.
“This is telling…” Koa says from the corner.
Magnolia looks over at him. “What is?”
My friend and I catch eyes from opposite sides of the room and he goes to say something annoying but I cut him off. “Nothing.”
“Oh, it’s something—” He shakes his head, amused.
I nod my chin towards the door. “Ko, get the fuck out—”
“Ooh,” he chimes, just to shit me. “You gonna kiss her with that mouth?”
Magnolia looks between us confused and I roll my eyes, make sure she can tell I think he’s an idiot.
But yeah, I am.
