The next day, Andrusha was in a crabby mood. And I learned that when he was crabby, he was bossy as fuck.
I made the mistake of heading to his office to borrow a pen and found him barking on the phone in Russian. He eyed me as I hovered at the door.
He snapped his fingers and pointed to the couch. My eyes widened at his over-the-top gesture, but I sat down. He paid no attention to me. But I was aware of him. I watched as he vibrated with irritation on the phone.
He was just getting off the phone when Vlad showed up.
I stood up to leave, but Andrusha scowled at me and said, “Sit.”
So, I sat through their meeting, feeling a bit smug that Andrusha was just as bitchy with Vlad as he was with me.
When Andrusha stepped outside the room to take a call, Vlad spun around in his chair to look at me. “You know, he only gets like this when he needs a woman.”
I froze, my gaze glued to my hands in my lap.
“You must not be doing a good job up there. Maybe we need to give him some other choices.”
This man was such a jerk. I unfolded myself from the couch and moved out of the office.
Andrusha was standing at the rails, looking over the bay, talking rapidly in Russian.
I moved stealthily behind him, trying to escape his notice. A big hand wrapped around my wrist and spun me around.
He towered over me with a pissed look on his face. “Where are you going?”
“You’re in a mood,” I retorted in defense.
A smile came over his face, and he said something in Russian before he hung up. “I am in a mood.” His hand tugged me closer, and then I felt a big hand slide around my neck. Thrills shot through me, as I stared up at him.
He pushed his fingers into my hair and tugged lightly, pulling my head back slightly, but he didn’t kiss me. He just stared at my face, and then his eyes dropped to my mouth. “Why are you leaving my office?”
Because Vlad’s an asshole. “No reason.”
“I have to go out tonight.”
Again? I hated it when he left at night. I was terrified of what could happen. Would he get into another gunfight? Would Bunko attack him? What kind of danger was he anticipating when he left with so many armed men? “Okay.”
“What are you going to do tonight?”
Keep myself busy until you come home safe. “I might watch a movie.”
His thumb stroked the rapid pulse in my neck while I reveled in the magnetic pull that he had on my body. It was almost impossible to resist.
“Don’t wait up.”
I woke up to Andrusha crashing into something in the dark. I heard him swear lightly before he turned on the light over the stove. I watched his silhouette put ice in his glass before he poured himself a drink.
I lay completely still, feigning sleep, wondering what his routine was when he came in here to sleep. Would he crawl into bed again? I heard the clatter of his weapons being set on the wooden coffee table.
Then I heard the sound of chair legs dragging on the floor.
I resisted the temptation to raise my head, trying to understand what he was doing with the chair.
He sat down with a sigh and there was a rattle of ice in a glass as he took a sip of his drink. I sat up, squinting in the dark. I could make out his shadow, sitting on a chair only a few feet away from the foot of the bed.
“I woke you.” His voice was low, his accent rough.
I could see familiar glitter on his clothes, which glowed in the dark. “You were at the strippers.”
“All my meetings take place at clubs.”
“Did you get a lap dance?”
“Against my will,” he said shortly.
There was something so flat in his tone, some truth, that I believed him. “Was she a good dancer, at least?”
“She didn’t dance like you.”
“I used to be a better dancer before I hurt my knee.”
Ice clinked again as he lifted his drink. His voice sounded gruff. “Did you ever give lap dances?”
I had hated giving lap dances and had avoided them at all costs. They had been too intimate. “Not that often, although that’s where most of the money is. Why?”
More ice clinked. “You should go to sleep now, Olivia. I’m still in a mood.”
I wanted to push him like he always seemed to push me. “Were you watching me sleep?”
“Trying to, before I woke you.”
“Why?” I was shocked that he admitted it so openly.
“Because seeing you sleep reminds me of who I am.”
I didn’t understand that statement, but I did recognize the overwhelming emotion in my chest. This man. Why did he make me feel so much at times?
Unable to stop myself, I slid out of bed and padded towards him, aware that I was in only a tank top and a pair of panties.
He stared at me for a long moment. “Olivia, I have limited self-control right now,” he warned.
I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t know what I wanted from this man, and I was terrified of where this might lead, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself. He made me feel so good when I was in his arms. Was it wrong to want a bit of that tonight?
I stepped closer, between his spread legs.
“What are you looking for?” he growled as a big arm snaked around my waist, tugging me closer.
I put my hands on his big shoulders and took in a trembling breath.
He kissed me. He tasted of bourbon and hot male as he scorched me with his mouth. My fingers clung in his hair as his mouth plundered me to the point of breathlessness.
He lifted his head. “This is such a bad idea.”
But his hand trailed up beneath my tank top, and I gasped when I felt his hand trace over my breast. Light fingertips teased my nipple until it was hard. His mouth followed, and I clung to him as sensations flowed through my body. My fingers tangled in his hair as his mouth feasted on me.
He stood up, lifting me with him. He walked me towards the bed, and then he was laying me down on my back. He hovered over me, his mouth only a couple of inches over mine.
I knew there might be regret in the morning, but right now, all I wanted was more of what he was giving me. He slowly lowered his mouth to mine, kissing me with such perfection that I relaxed and sighed.
Light fingertips trailed down my stomach, teasing.
His kiss deepened as he slowly pushed his fingers beneath my panties. I gasped into his mouth as I felt his fingers lightly trail over my folds, teasing me ever so gently.
My neck arched back, as I felt his finger rim my entrance. Nothing had ever felt that good before. His mouth moved down my neck, but he lifted his head to watch my face as he slowly pushed his finger into me.
“You feel so soft,” he breathed. His mouth was on mine, on my neck, my shoulders, and my breasts, but all I could think about was his finger and how it moved inside me. Pleasure unfolded on pleasure, overwhelming me, making me hang onto the last vestige of control I had over my body. My back was arched with the pressure.
“Let go, Olivia.” He trailed his mouth just beneath my ear. “I want to feel you come all over my fingers.”
Oh my god.
“I can’t,” I gasped.
I was panting when he knelt between my legs and tugged my panties down before carelessly tossing them over his shoulder.
I watched with both dread and fascination when he lowered his mouth between my legs while his big hands pushed my legs open.
Oh my god. My hips jerked off the bed when his warm mouth covered my sex. He raised his head and gave me a wolfish smile before he went back to invading my body with his tongue. My fingers clawed the quilt, and I made wild, drugged noises while he devoured me. My hips tried to buck, but he pinned down my hips, forcing me to receive everything he was giving me.
“Andrusha,” I cried as the pressure built to an almost unsurvivable level.
When he pulled my clit into his mouth and lightly sucked, my entire world shattered. I let out a thin scream as rolling waves of sensation jerked through my body.
He wrapped me in his arms and yanked me to his chest, holding my trembling body against his. When my heart calmed and my body stopped shaking, I snuggled harder against him, loving how his arms felt around me. We spent hazy minutes not speaking, just holding. Finally, he pulled me back and looked into my eyes.
I was drowning in his gaze. Why did I have to feel so much for him? Out of all the men in this world, why him?
“Don’t look at me like that.” His voice was low.
“I don’t know how else to look at you.”
“I’m trying damn hard to leave you alone.”
“Why do you want to leave me alone?” I think we both knew my heart was hanging by a thread, so it was a stupid question, but I wanted to hear him say it.
“I don’t play fair.”
I licked my lips. “Tell me.”
He traced a finger down my neck, between my breasts, over my rib cage before slowly teasing my stomach. “I want you to be free.”
“From you?”
“From all of this.”
My heart tripped beneath my rib cage. “What do you mean, you don’t play fair?”
His fingers slid between my legs, swirling, making me jerk involuntarily towards his hand as they pushed inside my sensitive flesh. My body went full throttle at his touch. “Does it feel fair when I do this?”
I didn’t care how fair it was. I just wanted him to keep on going. “Don’t stop.”
“When my fingers or tongue are in your pussy, what will you do for me?”
“Anything,” I choked out.
His teeth nibbled down my neck. “That doesn’t sound fair.”
“I don’t care,” I panted.
“Make me stop touching you.” His voice was harsh as he rolled over me, kissing and sucking his way over my breast and down my stomach.
“I don’t know how.” My back arched when I felt his stubble against my inner thigh.
His mouth moved over an inch, and his wicked tongue played with my clit. “You need to learn to say no to me.”
“I don’t want to.” I worked to keep my entire body from quivering. Sensation threatened to overtake me.
He wrapped both hands behind my thighs and grabbed my hips, a movement designed to give him better leverage to push his tongue further inside of me. I came on his tongue, crying out his name in the dark.
He gathered me into his arms, stood up, and easily cradled me. I was like a melting marshmallow in his arms. I put the palm of my hand on his face.
“Andrusha.”
He kissed my hand, walking me around the bed.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
He gently lowered me into the bed and pulled the covers over me. “I need to leave before I do something you regret.”
“Andrusha,” I protested.
He pushed his hand roughly into my hair, turning my face towards him. “Please don’t let me fuck you.”
He meant it. He was still trying to protect me.
“I don’t need to be protected from you,” I whispered my lie, wanting it to be the truth.
He bent down and gave me a long, hard kiss, before he pushed the hair off my face. “Yes, you do.”
I heard him walk across the room, pick up his weapons and drink, and disappear.
When I woke up in the morning, there was no sign of Andrusha. His office was empty, he wasn’t in the loft, and he’d left Viktor behind to babysit. It was just as well. I was still coming to grips with what had happened last night. Andrusha felt like the edge of an abyss I was hurtling over. The way he made my body feel was beyond description. But in the light of day, the prospect of losing my heart to him seemed more frightening. The fact that he warned me repeatedly not to cross this line with him didn’t help.
The sound of nails on the floor broke me out of my daydreams, before a big white furball jumped on me, and a hot, panting tongue licked my neck.
“Oh my god, Sasha!” I cried, throwing my arms around his neck. “What are you doing here?”
Sasha barked over his shoulder.
Another Russian accent spoke from the door. “Someone’s happy to see you.”
I glanced up at Mica. “The feeling is mutual.”
He looked around the office. “Andrusha said he’d be here shortly.”
“Thank you for bringing Sasha by.” I kissed his furry neck. “We missed him so much.”
Mica leaned against the desk and watched the two of us. “It was more for our own sanity. Sasha let us know every day that he wanted to come back here.”
“How did he do that?”
“He’s destroyed a lot of stuff in the last few days.”
I looked at Sasha and murmured, “Bad doggie.”
Sasha wagged his tail and stood up to sniff my neck.
Mica smiled. “How are things going?”
I thought about Mica’s history with Andrusha. He knew about Amelia. He knew the story between them and would possibly know how Andrusha felt about her.
The words sounded desperate coming out of my mouth. “Do you think Andrusha still loves Amelia?”
Mica took my question seriously. “I don’t know.”
“Not that it’s any of my business.”
“You want it to be part of your business?”
“Sometimes.” I shrugged, not looking at him.
Mica grinned and crossed his arms. “Oh, I see.”
“It’s stupid.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s made it pretty clear he doesn’t want the same things I want.”
He looked thoughtful. “I think you’d be surprised by what he wants.”
The sounds of footsteps up the metal stairs had us both watching the door. Andrusha appeared in the doorway. His eyes found me before they dropped to the dog and then moved over to his friend.
“You realize you’re never getting your dog back.”
They both laughed when Mica replied something in Russian.
Andrusha looked at me, “What were you two talking about?”
“Just hanging out,” Mica said easily.
Sasha nosed my palm. Then he picked up his ball and looked at me with bright eyes.
“I think someone wants to play.” I stood up.
Sasha and I went down to the bay to play ball. Above us, Andrusha and Mica stood on the second-floor balcony, watching us. I kept my eye on both of them. I could sense how relaxed Andrusha was, giving me an indication of his level of friendship with Mica.
At one point, Andrusha told Mica a story in rapid-fire Russian. Mica was laughing so hard, he needed to hang onto the rail. Andrusha was barely able to speak through his own laughter. I could barely tear my eyes off the sight. He looked different, intoxicatingly carefree.
Mica eventually came down the stairs, and Andrusha disappeared into his office. Sasha took one look at Mica and bolted up the stairs, straight to the loft.
He watched his dog disappear before looking back at me.
I gave him a regretful smile, “Want me to go get him?”
He gave me a beautiful smile. “Is it okay if Sasha stays here for a while? I think he’s happier.”
My heart zinged. “Of course.”
He looked up at Andrusha’s office. “He’s a tough nut to crack. Be patient.”
“It’s complicated.”
He gave a short laugh. “It always is.”
“Thanks for lending me your dog.”
He reached down and gave me a short hug. “We’ll talk soon.”
I entertained myself for the rest of the day and evening, waiting to see if Andrusha would come back to the loft.
At ten, I drifted by his office to see how he was doing. Instead, I found Vlad, sitting at his desk and hanging up the phone.
“Is Andrusha around?” I asked from the doorway.
“He’s gone for the night. Which is too bad, considering his fiancée just called here.”
I froze. “His fiancée?”
Vlad stood up, looking satisfied. “She’s on her way here right now. Well, this is a wrinkle, considering he has someone like you living in his space.”
I had no idea what to say or do. I felt queasy. “She’s coming here?”
Vlad smiled. “Won’t this be fun.”
