I’ve never felt pain like this. Never felt grief so excruciating I can barely breathe through the agony. But then, I’ve never lost my parents before either. From the moment the police arrived at my front door until now, all I’ve felt is a pain so deep I can barely breathe. It steals the air from my lungs, the tears from my eyes, and the hope from my heart.
A life without them seems so bleak, like a life I don’t want to live at all.
But there’s something that cuts even deeper than my pain, and that’s the pain of my siblings. Snow hasn’t stopped crying. Her hysterical sobs almost break me. Storm is stoic as always, the true head of the family he’s been since Dad retired a few years ago. But underneath the mask he wears when he faces the world is a man facing the reality of life without the people who raised him. Rayne and Emerson are curled up on the lounge together. His head resting in her lap as she strokes his dark, messy hair carefully. It’s their wedding day. The happiest day of their lives. But it’s tainted now. Tainted with death, and pain, and darkness, like so many other parts of their life.
I find myself hoping to wake up from this nightmare, from the dream that just won’t end. But eventually I’ll have to face the harsh reality that this is our life now. Our family losing its monarchs too soon.
I squeeze my eyes shut to ward off the tears that threaten. We were meant to have more time. They were meant to see the rest of us get married. They should have held our children and spoiled them rotten. They should have died when they were old and gray, not the young and vibrant couple that had taken over the dance floor just a few hours ago.
But there’s no more time. No more weddings. No grandparents for our children. Nothing. Our family will never be whole again.
A knock at the door startles me as I look at my siblings, expecting one of them to head for the door to let someone they invited in. But when none of them make a move and Storm looks at me meaningfully, my legs move of their own accord. The family estate is expansive, much bigger than the six of us ever needed, but it holds a homely feel I’ll never be able to give up. It’s why we fled here after I gave my siblings the news, because this is where our family became whole. It’s where we lived when my father rose to power, when he took his life back from people who wanted to destroy him.
I walk down the long hallway, the movement so like the one that led me to being told my parents were dead just a few hours ago, and yet, somehow, this seems more ominous. Something about the way Storm looked at me as I left the room makes me unsteady on my feet, or maybe it’s just the exhaustion of the day and the rollercoaster of emotions we’ve all been through. Either way, by the time I reach the heavy wooden door, my hands are shaking.
The porch light illuminates a figure on the other side of the stained glass, and given the hour, normally I would have at least picked up mace on my way. But alas, if anyone is brave enough to attack the estate, they probably deserve whatever reward comes with me answering the door.
All the air leaves my lungs when I swing the door open. My mouth drops open, and fresh tears for a different loss fill my eyes as I stare at my past. His body is covered by a suit so similar to the ones my brothers wore, the muscles underneath the expensive fabric barely contained, the dirty brown locks of hair I’ve run my fingers through more times than I care to think about is wild and untamed, but it’s his eyes that capture mine and holds me prisoner. A blue so deep the depths of the ocean couldn’t compete. The fleck of gold you would miss if you weren’t staring in the right light glints at me, and my hold on the door tightens as my body threatens to crumple.
Everett Masters is the last person I ever expected to see again. The man who broke me, who disappeared, never to be heard from again, the man my brothers don’t think I know works for Frost Industries.
“Wynter,” he whispers, my name sounding like a prayer on his lips.
As if out of instinct, my hand holding the door swings forward, and a moment later, the heavy wood slams in his face. The sound echoes throughout the house, the space too large to handle such a large bang.
I stumble down the hallway, holding on to the wall for support as my insides war against themselves. The hatred I have for the man standing at the door is almost overwhelmed by the love still lurking under the surface. I’ve loved him since before I even knew what love was, and before I knew how much it could hurt.
“It’s for you.” I glare pointedly at Storm, and the ghost of a smirk tugs at his lips, as if he saw my reaction coming from a mile away and relished in how uncomfortable it would be for me to be in the room with the only man I have ever allowed close enough to break my heart. The only man I have ever accepted into my body. Not that my brother needs to know I lost my virginity to his best friend.
I throw myself into the seat between Rayne and Emerson, and Snow, who immediately curls into me, her tears soaking through the fabric of my sweater. None of us were ready to lose our parents, but she’s still so young. The baby of the family. She should have had more time. We all should have.
Storm leaves the room, his grey eyes meeting mine once more over his shoulder as he takes the final sip of the scotch he’s been nursing since we got here and places the glass on the small bar by the lounge’s entry.
“Who was at the door?” Snow asks between gentle sobs.
I worry my bottom lip between my teeth as I consider my answer. She knows about Everett. She held me as I cried after he left. She saw the broken, jagged pieces he left behind and helped me glue the unmatching pieces back together even though they didn’t fit. “Everett,” I say quietly, meeting Rayne’s stormy eyes as his name slips between my lips.
“About time,” he murmurs, looking up at Emerson with a gentle smile. I’ve never seen my brother look at anyone, or anything for that matter, as he looks at her. The love between them is obvious, so clear behind eyes so dark they’re almost black. It makes my heart ache for that kind of connection. The kind of connection I thought I shared with Everett.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I hiss.
He smirks. “You’ll see.”
But as I watch Everett walk into the room beside my brother as they had so many times during our childhood, I can’t help but see the boy I fell in love with in the dangerous man he’s become. His eyes meet mine again and I barely draw in a breath, his gaze suffocating in its intensity.
Everett is everything I ever wanted, until he broke my heart. Now he’s everything I can never allow myself to long for again. Because my heart can’t handle a break like that again, the jagged pieces from the last time are barely mended.
