Four months later
The entire room is silent, except for the beeping sounds of the monitors. Sitting beside Poppy, I place one hand on the top of her head as my other holds on to hers. She stares up at me, her eyes glazed over as they rapidly search mine in a panic.
“What’s happening? Is everything okay?” She’s breathless and scared. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified too, but I have to be calm and strong for her right now.
“It’s okay, baby,” I tell her, softly stroking her hair through the surgical cap. I can’t see past the blue curtain that is draped in front of us, blocking the view as the doctors work down below on Poppy’s abdomen.
I hear Dr. Livingston, our surgeon, as she speaks to her assistant in a soft voice. I can’t decipher the words she says, but I can make out the top of her head as she stands up. Her eyes meet mine over the drape and I can see her cheekbones rising as she smiles beneath her mask.
“This little guy does not want to come out,” she laughs lightly. “You’re going to feel some pressure as we try to get him out, Poppy.”
Glancing down at Poppy, her eyes are filled with fright as she stares up at me and nods. “Okay,” she whispers as I sit back down beside her and cup the side of her face.
“It’s okay, baby. I’m right here with you.”
The doctors continue their work and Poppy’s body rocks back and forth slightly as they attempt to pull the baby out. He’s already as stubborn as the two of us and refusing to let them get him out. There’s more movement from the doctors and Poppy’s hand tightens around mine.
And then we hear it.
The shrill cry of our little boy as they lift him from Poppy’s abdomen.
“Oh my god,” Poppy cries out, tears springing from her eyes. “Is he okay? I know he’s supposed to cry, but he’s okay, right?”
Rising to my feet, I watch as the nurse carries the baby across the room, setting him down in a crib-looking box as they begin to assess him. He’s still crying and Poppy has a death grip on my hand. I glance down at the doctors as they continue to busy themselves at Poppy’s stomach, working to close the area of her abdomen they just pulled our baby from.
“Dad,” one of the nurses calls over to me as I lift my eyes to hers. “You want to come over and cut the cord?”
Glancing down at Poppy, my eyes desperately search hers as she begins to nod eagerly. I’m torn between the two right now. Of course, I want to see our little guy and go cut the cord, but I don’t want to leave Poppy’s side. I want to be in two places at once and it’s entirely impossible.
“Go,” she urges, her voice cracking. “Please. Go to our baby.”
Nodding, I lean down, pressing my lips to her forehead. “I’ll be right back, my love.”
Leaving her on the table, I rush across the room, my strides long until I reach the nurse. Her eyes smile at me as she moves out of the way and I see our baby for the first time. The oxygen leaves my lungs in a rush and my heart constricts as I watch his face contort in anger as he belts out another cry.
The nurse hands me a strange-looking pair of scissors and holds the cord up to me. “You’re going to want to cut through right here,” she explains, pointing to the area for me to do it.
My hand shakes as I position it where she showed me and panic instantly fills me. My stomach rolls as I glance up at her. “It’s not going to hurt him, right?”
“Of course not,’ she chuckles lightly as she shakes her head. “He’s a little angry that we took him out of his momma right now.”
Nodding, I inhale deeply and hold my breath as I cut through the cord. There’s a weird resistance, feeling like I’m cutting through a garden hose as I slice through it. This is all so surreal. The nurse takes the scissors from me and I look over at Poppy, but I can’t see her past the curtain.
“Closing now,” the surgeon says out loud as they both continue to work on her abdomen.
Glancing back at the baby, I watch the nurse wrap him in a blanket like a burrito before lifting him from the small clear box. She turns to face me, smiling with her eyes as she hands him to me. I freeze for a moment, my heart in my throat as I take the tiny little person from her and cradle him in my arms.
Holy fucking shit.
I can’t believe this is real. Staring down at his delicate little face, I can’t take my eyes away from him. I’m paralyzed with fear, afraid to move. What if I drop him? He seems so fragile, I’m afraid I am going to break him.
“You can take him over to see Mom,” the nurse tells me, placing her hand on my shoulder. “You look absolutely terrified right now. You’re okay to walk him over there, you won’t drop him.”
“But what if I do?” I ask her, the panic rolling in the pit of my stomach.
She smiles through her mask. “You won’t.”
Swallowing the nervousness down, I nod and take a deep breath. I can do this. All I have to do is walk a few feet and I can sit down with him. My movements are slow as I begin to walk toward Poppy, the warmth of our baby radiating through the blanket as I hold him to my chest, and I can feel the sensation in my soul.
As I step closer to Poppy, her head turns to the side, a sob falling from her lips as she sees me and the baby. Tears stream down the sides of her cheeks and I walk around to the seat next to her and sit down.
I’m nervous as hell, moving him away from my chest, and I bring him down to her. Her arms are still strapped down from when they were performing the surgery, so she isn’t able to hold him. I lower him to her face and she stares at him with nothing but pure fucking love in her eyes.
“Oh my god, August,” she breathes as a small sob slips from her lips. “He’s so perfect. Look at him.”
I look at him and then my eyes fall on her, completely mesmerized by the way she’s staring at our baby. I swear, witnessing this is like falling in love with her all over again. A warmth spreads through my soul and my heart clenches as I’m lost in the two of them.
“You’re both so fucking perfect,” I murmur, leaning closer to her as I press my lips to the side of her head. “You are so amazing, Poppy. I’m completely and utterly fucking in love with you. With the two of you.”
Her eyes meet mine, wet with tears as they search my gaze. “We really did this, August. We made this little guy.” She pauses for a moment, her eyes widening. “He needs a name.”
Staring back at her, I’m lost in the depths of her oceanic blue eyes. She looks back at our baby and I move him closer to her face as she presses her lips to his nose, murmuring to him as he stirs in my hands.
She’s right… he does need a name. We talked about different ones before he came, but never found one we settled on. The only thing that kept coming back to my mind was her sister. We need a way to honor her, and what better way than naming him after her?
“What about Everett?”
Poppy’s eyes flash to mine. “Everett?” She swallows roughly, the emotion washing over her face.
I nod, smiling down at my beautiful girl. “It sounds kind of similar to Evie and I think we should name him after her.”
“Oh, August,” she sobs, the tears streaming down her face as she smiles at me, before looking back at our little guy. “Everett,” she murmurs, lost in the delicate features of his face. “It’s perfect. So perfect.”
You’re perfect.
Looking back up at me, her eyes smile along with her lips. “What did I ever do to deserve someone like you?”
“I ask myself the same question every day, baby,” I tell her, bringing my face down to hers as I press my lips to hers. Pulling back, I press the side of my head to hers as we both stare at Everett.
I’m completely lost in love with the two of them and if there’s one thing that is for certain, it’s that I will spend the rest of my days protecting and loving them. What we had started out as a fling with no strings attached. And what we have now is something that will last forever.
I will spend the rest of my life being the man that deserves her love. When you find a love like this, it’s fucking sacred. You do everything in your power to keep it safe, to water the flowers and watch them bloom.
And I’ll build her an entire fucking garden out of my love just to watch her flourish.
