Done playing?
Is this all that it is to him?
Are my heart and my body a bloody game?
The fury from earlier sweeps over me. My posture stiffens, but I keep my tone level when I speak.
“Actually no, Aiden. I’m not done playing. I think I’ll take Xander up on his offer and become his girlfriend — for real this time. Then, there’s Cole. I didn’t realise he’s so interesting and smart. Even Ronan is so charming. Choices, choices.”
“Are you done?” Aiden’s jaw is tight, but he manages to control whatever temper is trying to blaze through.
“I’m not done. You don’t believe me, do you? Do you think I’m bluffing? I’ll prove it to you.”
He grips my arm with brute force. “You’re not going anywhere.”
“Watch me.”
I push at his stupid broad shoulders. I should know better than to use physical strength against him, but at this moment, I’m so worked up I can’t think straight. He keeps me pinned to the tree with an effortless hand around my arm.
“Let me the fuck go,” I pant with frustration.
“Never.”
He says the word with so much conviction. So much… authority.
I stop and stare at him with what must look like an ‘are you shitting me’ expression.
“You already moved on, so let me do the same.” My voice breaks and I clear my throat. “What the hell do you want from me anymore?”
I resist the pressure building behind my eyes.
I’m not going to cry.
“Do you honestly believe it’s even possible to move on from you, sweetheart?” The strange mixture of tenderness and anger causes my heart to jump.
“Everyone at school saw you move on with Silver just fine.”
“I don’t care about everyone at school. The show was only meant for you.”
“For me?” The bite of anger returns again. “Did I miss some memo that you should be parading with another girl after we had sex for the first time? Not to mention that you abandoned me after said sex.”
Aiden’s lips quirk in a victorious smile. “There. That’s the reaction I’ve been hoping for.”
“What?” I snap.
“You wanted this.”
“I wanted this? Your manipulation game is strong but it’s not strong enough to make me believe I wanted you on another girl’s arms!”
“You wanted to have a choice. A real one.” The grey of his eyes hardens to gunmetal. “So I gave you a chance to choose me. Your reply is three days late, but I’ll take it.”
My lips move to say something, but nothing comes out. I’m speechless.
After a few seconds — or minutes — of staring at his wrongfully beautiful face, I say, “Your way of giving me a choice is thrusting Silver in my face?”
“An encouragement.”
I laugh without humour. As usual, he always makes the choices swing in his direction. “Why Silver? Why not any other girl?”
“She threatens you.”
“What?”
“It’s subconscious, but I noticed that she’s the only one you glare at. Even when she doesn’t get in your way.”
“Wow. I’m really speechless. You never play fair, do you?”
“Oh, but I did. I gave you the choice that you were itching for. If it were up to me, I wouldn’t have left your side.”
The heavy weight that’s been perching on my chest since Saturday eases like a silent wave.
I’m still angry as hell at him, but he was giving me what I wanted – even if his method sucks.
“If you sent me a text or called me over the weekend, I wouldn’t have resorted to this method.” Aiden continues, not appearing the least bit apologetic. If anything, his left eye twitches as if he’s pissed off. “You know patience was never my thing.”
“What would have you done next with Silver? Date her? Kiss her? Fuck her? Maybe in the opposite order.”
“Silver means fuck to me and she knows it.” He lets go of my arm to palm both my cheeks. “You’re the one who keeps me up all night.”
“Screw you, Aiden.” My words are muffled when his lips brush against mine.
A lump clogs my throat and a moan fights to escape. I fight back tears but this time it’s for an entirely different reason.
It’s like my heart has resurrected after being stabbed to death.
It’s scary how Aiden controls my mood. I lost my body and my better judgement to him, and now my happiness seems to be controlled by him, too.
“If you go near Silver again, it’s over, Aiden,” I whisper near his mouth.
That earns me a glare. Aiden dislikes being threatened, but I need to draw the line there. It’s not really about jealousy or possessiveness — although part of it is true. But mostly, it’s about my self worth. As much as I hate to admit it, Silver threatens me and I’ll never allow him to make me feel like I did this morning.
“Don’t say the word ‘over’ when we didn’t even start.”
“Then don’t go near Silver. I mean it, Aiden. I’ll never forgive cheating.”
“I like your possessiveness, sweetheart.” He places a teasing kiss on the corner of my mouth. “But will you be able to get over me?”
“I’d rather break my heart in pieces and step on the remains than be with you.”
He pulls back enough to study my face with an indecipherable expression. “Noted.”
“I want to trust you. I really do. But until then, I can’t be in a relationship with you.”
He narrows his eyes, but quickly lets it go. “I’ll prove that you can trust me.”
“You can trust me, too. I’ll never cheat on you.”
His expression darkens as if the mere word offends him. “I know you won’t.”
“What will you do if I somehow cheat?” I’m treading into a dangerous territory, but curiosity gets the better of me.
“Kill the bastard.” No hesitation.
“How about me?”
He cups my jaw with false tenderness. “That’s the difference between you and me, sweetheart. You’d leave me in a heartbeat if I cheat, but I’ll never leave you even if you cheat.”
It’s a hypothetical situation, but it strikes a chord within me. I feel an overwhelming need to kiss him. Devour him. Just pluck him away and hide him from the world where I’m the only one who can look at him, touch him, and talk to him.
I won’t be sharing his smiles with Silver or anyone else.
He seals his lips against mine, biting my bottom lip into his mouth and pulls away too fast. “Now, say it.”
“Say what?” I pant.
“Say that you choose me.”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
“Say the words, Elsa.”
My arms wrap around his neck and I graze the hairs at the back of his neck. “It’s crazy, but I choose you, Aiden.”
His mouth claims mine as his fingers grab a handful of my hair, releasing it from the band. His hand snakes under my arse and I lift myself, wrapping my legs around his lithe waist. I’m lost in the moment. In him. Everything seems to be moving way too fast and in a direction I don’t recognise.
But I’m done pretending he means nothing. I’m done fighting against myself and the pull he has on me.
My fingers thread into his hair as I open up to him. His other hand grips my hip, pulling me against his hard muscles. My breasts crush into his chest and suddenly, I hate our clothes. I hate my tracksuit and his jersey. I hate that my skin can’t be glued to his.
The need to engrave myself in him hits me again.
It’s a strange, sporadic urge that overwhelms me and refuses to let go.
I rub my stomach against his growing erection. The sense of time and space escapes me in a heartbeat. In a moment, I picture us in a room. There’s no one but the two of us in that room. It’s quiet except for our harsh breathing.
Footsteps pound beyond the room’s door. I continue kissing Aiden, not wanting to break the spell.
Something nags at the back of my mind. My limbs start to tremble and my shoulder blades stiffen with black, deep fear.
“He’s coming,” I whisper against Aiden’s mouth.
The school’s backyard comes back into focus, and Xander’s blonde hair peeks from behind the corner. “Coach is after your arse, King.”
Aiden’s dark attention stays on me.
It’s like he knows that I didn’t mean Xander or anyone here when I said ‘He’s coming.’
