“Keller, what’s taking them so long?” My knee bounces on the floor mat as I try to watch out the windows.
He keeps his head straight, his knuckles turning white as he grips the steering wheel. “Enzo said they were coming out.”
It seems like a lifetime ago Frankie and Grayson left. I hug my knees tighter. I haven’t stopped crying, to the point my eyes are burning.
“Oh, fuck.” Keller opens his door and jumps out. My heart stops when I see them.
A red-faced Grayson is carrying Luca in his arms. Frankie comes into view, holding his shoulder, covered in blood.
I open the car door and step out, my legs barely holding me up. I grab onto the handle to steady myself.
“Get back in the truck,” Frankie shouts, wincing while pointing at the van and storming towards me.
I clamber back in. Keller rushes over and opens the back passenger door. Grayson lays Luca down on the seats next to me and I gasp. I want to be sick.
There is so much blood.
He’s so pale.
“Put his head on your lap. I’ll move him back so I can get in and keep pressure on his wounds.”
I lift my hands from my lap, and Grayson lays Luca’s limp head on me.
I can barely see through my tears.
“Luca,” I whisper. “Is he–?”
I can’t say the words.
“No.” Grayson pushes in and slams the door behind him.
My hands cup his face; he’s freezing cold. His breathing is shallow. The truck rumbles to life, and Keller erratically drives us.
I can’t stop looking at Luca’s face. Why does he look so peaceful? Why does he look dead?
I bend down and kiss his forehead. “Please don’t leave me, Luca,” I beg, hoping he can hear my voice. My tears drip onto his cheek.
“What the hell happened in there?” Keller shouts, making me jump.
“I got shot, Maria is dead, and Luca’s not in great shape. The doc is meeting us at the safe house,” Frankie gruffs out, clearly in pain himself.
Keller tosses his phone at Frankie. “Call Sienna. Make sure they’re in their rooms. I don’t want them seeing this,” he growls.
I turn to Grayson. “He needs a hospital, not just a doctor?”
“It’s not safe there, not now. We need to know Romano’s whereabouts. Our doc is the best, don’t worry. We even have a setup for surgery in the basement.” He keeps the pressure on Luca’s wounds.
I can’t bring myself to look at them. As soon as Frankie cuts the call, I swallow the bile in my throat and ask the question I don’t know if I want to hear the answer to.
“What about Eva?”
The car falls silent and I know.
I look up and Frankie turns in his seat, the pain obvious on his face. He opens his mouth, and I cut him off, stroking my hand through Luca’s hair for some sort of comfort.
“Don’t say it, Frankie.”
“I’m so sorry.” He balls his jacket and presses it against his shoulder.
I look down at Luca.
My whole body starts to shake violently, and I let it all out. My sister’s gone, Luca is dying on my lap, and it’s all my fault.
I should have taken her place.
“I’m sorry, Luca. I’m so sorry.” I hug his head.
We pull up outside our new home, and I can’t move. Not even when Grayson takes Luca from me. They’re talking, but I can’t concentrate.
Frankie opens my door. “Come on. Luca needs you.”
I take his hand and he helps me out of the truck. I look at his bleeding shoulder and a fresh wave of pain hits me.
“You’ve been shot,” I sob.
He pulls me into his hard chest, wrapping his good arm around me.
“I need you to listen to me. You’re a fucking Falcone. We are strong. We are powerful. You, Rosa, are the strongest of us all. After everything you’ve been through, you amaze me. We need to go in there and be strong for Luca. We can never bring back the people we’ve lost, Rosa. It’s life. We can’t let it kill us. You did everything you possibly could for Eva. You always have. Don’t let this break you.”
I press my face harder into his chest. I can’t bear it.
“What if he dies, Frankie? I can’t sit in there and watch. I can’t do it, Frankie.”
He strokes my back. “Rosa, if the worst really does happen, don’t you want to be by his side? I’d give anything to have been there to hold Leila’s hand when she took her last breath. Don’t let him down. Not now.”
I release my arms and step back, wiping away my tears with the back of my hand. “Take me to him.”
He nods, his hand quickly putting pressure back on his shoulder.
“Hey, isn’t that really painful?”
“Extremely. I’m waiting for Grayson to fix me up.”
I roll my eyes, of course.
I follow him to the door, past a crowd of armed guards.
I watch the seconds tick by on the clock on the wall. Frankie clears his throat opposite me. Two hours, forty-five minutes and thirty seconds since Keller and Grayson took Luca into the operating room.
I tear my stare from the minute hand to my uncle, who is now in fresh clothing and has one less bullet in his body.
“How are you so calm?” I ask, the silence becoming deafening.
“A lot of practice over the years.”
“Oh.” I take another small sip of my coffee.
“I will avenge her death, Rosa,” he says quietly.
I nod and look at the coffee swirling around in my mug. I can’t even comprehend she is really gone. I’ll never get to see my sister again. I’ll never get to hug her, to hear her laugh.
He can avenge her death all he likes. It doesn’t change the fact she’s never coming home.
I don’t have words or energy right now. “How did she die?”
“It was quick. That’s all you need to know.” He rubs a hand over his face, pulling out a packet of cigarettes from his pocket, sliding one across the table to me.
“I could do with something else, but I guess this will do.” I shrug and pick it up.
“Rosa.” His voice is stern.
“What?”
“You aren’t going back there. Don’t even consider it.”
“I said I could do with it, not that I am,” I snap back.
We head outside. I plonk myself down on the seat and tip my head back to look up at the stars. Taking in a deep inhale, tears pool in my eyes as I remember the nights with Luca, doing just this.
“This is such a mess. I should have just told Luca at the start. They killed Eva, anyway. It was all for nothing.” I take another shaky drag.
“You did the right thing, Rosa. You protected your family. You were looking out for Luca, for us. You lived with that monster for weeks. The blame is all on Romano, not you. You have to stop thinking like that. I saw the fearless Rosa you became, the girl I watched grow up. Be that woman. Don’t lose your fight. Not now.”
Frankie is right, I have a choice. I can either let this break me or I fight for what I do have left. Luca needs me to be strong. And, deep down, I think I knew I wasn’t going to see Eva again. Since the night before the wedding.
My life has been surrounded by death.
The door slides open and Grayson walks out, a somber look on his face.
I sit upright in my chair, rubbing my hands on my knees.
“Is he okay?” Frankie asks, offering Grayson his pack.
“Yes. He’s going to be fine.” Grayson pulls a cigarette out, then digs out a lighter.
I let out a gush of air, covering my face with my hands as relief washes over me.
The flame illuminates his face. “He managed to stop the internal bleeding and stitch up the stab wounds. We will need to keep an eye on infections. Other than that, he will make a full recovery.”
“Can I go and see him?” I throw my cigarette in the ashtray and jump off my seat.
Grayson nods, then looks at Frankie. “We need to talk.”
Frankie stands, dusting off his pants. “Let’s go.”
“He’s in the first bedroom on the left for now,” Grayson says to me, his arm resting up on the door.
I duck under him and sprint up the stairs as fast as I can, pushing open his door. A warm light glows from the nightstand. I muffle my sobs with my hands approaching the side of the bed.
He’s hooked up to god knows what on an IV. His face is swollen and bruised. There are bandages around both of his wrists. I inch closer, placing my hand softly over his. I slip under the covers next to him and prop myself up on my elbow to face him, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest. With my other hand resting over his heart, I lay there, keeping vigilant for as long as I can, making sure it keeps beating against my palm.
It’s not until I can’t physically keep my eyes open any longer, I drop a kiss to his temple. “I love you so much,” I whisper before shuffling back onto my own side of the bed and falling into a restless sleep.
