The ball slaps into Echo’s glove with a loud thwack, and my mouth curves high.
The team’s on the field in seconds, but they got an earful from Coach the last time they hopped up on my back, so it’s nothing but shouts and muscle flexes, a couple back pats and some fucker snags the hat off my head.
Echo, though, he doesn’t give a shit if he gets chewed out.
“That was a hell of a yakker, son!” He bends his big ass down and hoists me up on his shoulders, spinning to face Cal Poly’s top hitter … who didn’t make contact with a single ball today.
The redheaded dude flips me off, spitting on the dirt, and we laugh.
“Damn, Rogers, spitting on your own field?” Echo chuckles. “That’s rough, my man. Better luck tomorrow, huh?”
“Fuck you, stay away from our clubhouse tonight, assholes.” He glares, bumping into his teammate as he backs away.
“Eight o’clock sharp?” Echo nods, lowering me to my feet before wrapping his arms around my neck and yanking me to him. “Heard, son. Heard.”
“You’re a dick.” I laugh, catching my glove as Coach tosses it to me.
Echo makes his way into the dugout as Coach steps in front of me. He grips my shoulder a moment and keeps his eyes on mine as he tips his chin the slightest bit. The gesture may seem small to some, but it’s not to me. A sense of pride swells in my chest and I nod back.
“For you, Coach.”
“No, not today. This team hasn’t lost to our program in twenty years, son, and not only did they lose at home, but they didn’t bring a single bastard across the plate.” He gives my shoulder a short squeeze. “This one’s for you.”
My jaw clenches as my mother’s words from this morning come crashing into my mind, as does the way my father sat back and said nothing. But Meyer didn’t.
She spoke up when I couldn’t, when my father wouldn’t.
Just like Coach did the night I begged my parents to allow him over for dinner.
“Come talk to me after showers,” he says as he walks away.
Echo jogs over, his gear now off and jumps up, attempting to catch me in a headlock, but I tear myself free, snagging my hat from his hand.
“You’re coming out with us tonight.”
“Nah, man.” I put my hat on my head, moving my eyes his way.
“Yeah, man.” Echo shoves me. “This is your hometown; you need to let these Cal Poly boys know it.”
“After today, you think there’s a question?”
“Okay, there’s my cocky boy.”
“Fuck you.” I chuckle.
“No, Cruz.” He makes a show of biting his knuckles. “Fuck that. On the floor, on a chair, against the motherfucking tunnel walls …”
I laugh, eyeing the prize he’s pointed out, and what do you know, she starts walking over.
It’s not until she’s within earshot that the hand behind her back becomes visible, a microphone tucked tightly inside it.
Echo’s head falls with a full groan. “We know who she’s after. I’ll take the friend,” he teases, escaping a whole two seconds before the brunette’s cameraman is front and center.
She lifts a brow, but I laugh it off, and her smirk turns into a smile.
I spot Coach looking this way. He signals with a small nod for me to entertain the girl, so as her hand comes down on my bicep, I put on my best grin.
She switches into sassy secretary mode as she slips closer, looking back and forth between the camera and myself. “I’m here with the man everyone is dying to get their hands on, the one and only Tobias Cruz.”
My grin turns into a smirk, and I think the girl is pleased.
Time to kick the charm up to ten.
It’s like Coach says, exposure is key and personality wins every time.
Meyer
Bailey was up for my entire last session, but she was in a happy, playful mood, so I was able to swap out her hanging toys a few times and get through the lesson without any interruptions.
My earlier call I wasn’t so lucky, but thankfully Freya, the swim team captain, was able to hop on again once she went down for her nap. Overall, the day wasn’t as difficult as I expected it to be having her with me.
Wanting to make use of my time away with Bailey, I take her down to the hotel restaurant for a quick bite to eat with the room credit the school allotted, ordering a few things to take back to the room so I get the full benefit. We take the cookies and things back once I’m done, and I changed us into something we can wear into the water.
I try to ignore the fact that Tobias still isn’t back when I saw several familiar uniforms file in on the walk here.
Setting our things down, I carefully step us into the water, and at first, Bailey’s stiffens, her body jerking as her muscles lock and I smile at her, holding her away from my body slightly. She heaves forward, quickly clinging on to me and a low laugh escapes me.
A little slower, I step farther out, bending at the knee to bring her more under the water.
She starts to loosen, so I bounce a bit and her fingers fly into her mouth, her lips curving into a smile around them.
“See, Bay. It’s fun.” I grab her little hand and pat at the water.
She squeals, jerking her upper body, and I laugh, making sure my hold is tight as she tries to push away from me.
She starts slapping at the water, giggling like crazy, and my smile couldn’t be wider. Her blue eyes light up every time the water sprinkles against her face and she looks to me with her toothless grin, as if to say, ‘did you see, Mama?’
“Look at you playing in the water.” I lean over to kiss her temple. “Such a big girl, Bay.”
Tears fill my eyes, it’s such a bittersweet moment.
She’s having so much fun, experiencing something for the very first time, and there’s no one to share it with.
There’s never anyone to share anything with.
As I think it, guilt weighs in my chest.
That’s not true.
Bianca is always there, and if she isn’t, she’s reachable, at least when it comes to me. I know she goes out of her way to make sure she’s only a call away when it comes to me, because she knows I’m on my own.
My brother is busy, and I hate bothering him, though he’d be upset to hear this, but he’s trying to create a life and will drop everything if I ask.
I refuse to let him in on my struggles for that very reason.
When our mom passed, he was still in high school. If it weren’t for his best friend’s family, I would have had to defer college, and we’d have had to move to stay afloat since the only person who cared for us had nothing to leave behind. She worked hard all her life for the little we did have.
Thankfully, Milo’s friend gave him a home and I didn’t have to pass on my scholarship. At first, I was going to do it anyway; it didn’t feel right to leave him, but when he found out, he promised to never speak to me again if I did, he knew as well as I did if I let it slip from my fingertips, another would likely never come. He never would have cut me out, but I trusted my baby brother to trust me. If he couldn’t make a life for himself when his time came, I would make sure I made one for the both of us.
It was really hard on us both, being away from the only member that gave a damn. And then Bailey blessed our lives. Even though Milo’s not here, it’s obvious the peace she brings me is mirrored in him.
Bailey begins rubbing at her eyes, so I step from the water.
At first, she cries, as if she wants to get back in, but once I get her wet onesie off, and wrap her in a little cocoon white plush towel I brought from the room, she settles long enough for me to wrap one around myself.
As I get back to the hotel and I’m opening up the app to access the key card, a shadow falls over me.
My cheeks heat, knowing I’m a mess of knotted hair and dripping clothes, but a smile still plays at my lips as I spin.
It falls flat instantly as I find a completely different man standing there.
He looks from me to the ball of towel in my hand. “If my memory serves me correctly, I believe I received an email with payment information for childcare for this trip.”
“Guess you’re not as old as you’re beginning to look.” I shrug. “Your memory is still intact. I decided to bring my sitter along,” I lie.
He scoffs, his eyes falling to my arms again, but I spin, keeping my daughter out of his sight. He doesn’t deserve to look at her. His gaze snaps back to mine, a flicker of something I can’t and don’t care to read racing through them.
“Imagine my surprise when I looked at my log to find this was your room.”
“You’re the one who booked it.”
His nod is calculated, and he slides his hands into his khaki pockets. “I believe my pitcher’s room ended up being the one directly beside yours.”
“Is it?” I keep my face blank.
He cocks his head, staring for several seconds. “Have you seen my boy, Meyer?”
Vomit threatens to rise in my throat, but I refuse to swallow. “Have you tried knocking on his door?”
“He’s not in there.” His eyes narrow, flicking to my window and back.
“Well, I don’t know what to tell you.” I push my door open more, using my back to keep it from slamming shut.
“Team says he left the bar an hour ago.”
Bar.
My stomach curls.
Of course, I almost forgot about the stories that follow the players home after away games.
It’s the same for every sport, according to the few students of mine that are prone to overshare.
“Figured he’d be back by now.” He runs his fingers over the bill of his hat. “Oh well, he’ll call me when he’s … done.” A low snicker leaves him. “Guess old habits never die.”
I look away, refusing to fall into whatever it is this is.
The truth.
A trap.
A pit of lava with my name on it, also known as reality.
Coach Reid begins to walk away, but jerks to a stop, gazing at me curiously. “Shouldn’t you be on a call or something?”
“All my calls are done for the day, so I figured I’d take in all the hotel has to offer before I return to my chic little shed.” My voice is more bitter than intended.
His nod is slow, eyes narrowed, but before he goes, he says one more thing. “If you’re bored, you can catch his interview, should be up on the school website by now.” He walks away.
I quietly close the door and focus on what I need to do rather than the questions now threatening to cloud my mind. Placing Bailey in her playpen, I take the towel off of her so she doesn’t get herself tangled up, and she instantly begins to cry, the cool air now hitting her chilled skin.
“Just a minute, Bay.” I jog over and fill the sink with lukewarm water, quickly rushing back to her and lifting her into my arms once more.
“Hey, Bay, it’s okay. Here we go.” I gently lower her into the water, using a rolled-up hand towel as a pillow behind her head. “There we are. Here, want your mimi?”
She fusses a little more, but quiets in the warmth once the Binky is in her mouth. She rubs at her eyes so I bathe her as quickly as I can, thankful when she settles in the playpen after long enough for me to quickly wash myself off and free my hair of the chlorine.
She’s humming and fake cackling when I get out, so I throw my hair in the towel and get us both settled on the bed for her feeding.
She gets angry when she can’t play with my hair, but I run my fingers over hers a few times and a heavy exhale slips from her nose, making me smile.
“There we go, Bay,” I whisper.
She doesn’t eat much, too tired from her evening playtime to stay awake long enough, so I know she’ll wake again soon.
I should brush my hair out and get some of my own work done while I can, but instead, I open my computer, click on the school webpage and scroll down until I find the link for the Avix Inquirer.
The headline and time stamp that reads nearly four hours earlier makes my throat burn, but I click through anyway.
Avix Inquirer: Does the Playboy Pitcher have a plaything back home?
I push the ache creeping up my ribs down as I look to the placeholder image on the interview video, a dirt-stained Tobias standing beside a gorgeous reporter. He looks as handsome as ever.
Hat backward, smirk deep, and eyes playful.
I start the video and the woman speaks first.
“I’m here with the man everyone is just dying to get their hands on, the number one prospect this year, Tobias Cruz.”
Her innuendo is clear, and Tobias grins, letting her know he picked up on it.
“Tobias, tell us about tonight’s game. What was going through your head when that last batter stepped into the box?”
He licks his lips, drawing her and everyone watching at home’s attention to his mouth. “I was thinking about what I was going to order from room service when I got back to my hotel.”
A low laugh leaves me.
“Okay, so you were confident you were getting out of this game without a single run scored?”
Pride warms me, and I hope his parents felt compelled to tune in.
“It’s not the first in the season, and it won’t be the last. I’m just happy to have a kick-ass team behind me.”
“Was it a different kind of sweet to come to your hometown and dominate against the coach who didn’t offer a spot to you three years ago?”
“No, it was sweet to add another W to my coach’s record. And for the record, even if Cal Poly had wanted me, they wouldn’t have gotten me. Coach Reid is the reason I’ve become the player that I am, and I’ll forever be in his debt.”
My pulse quickens and I pull my knees up, unsure if I want to hear more.
“We love to hear a player such as yourself give credit where it’s due.” The young woman smiles, opening and closing her fingers against the microphone. “So, how will you celebrate this win tonight, Mr. Cruz.” She smiles coyly.
Tobias’s chuckle is low, his lips curved to one side as his tongue comes out again to wet them. “Just so happens I’ve got someone waiting on me tonight.” The woman widens her eyes playfully, looking to the camera and Tobias grins wider, adding, “It’s good to be home.”
My gut sinks and I look back to the heading again.
Four hours since the game ended.
Of course.
This is his hometown, where he grew up all his life. No duh, he has people waiting around to see him. Old friends and old flames, old hopefuls hoping for a second shot.
And there’s nothing standing in their way because Tobias is a single man. A successful, charismatic, single man with the world at his fingertips.
I don’t want to be here should he stumble in, especially if when he does, he’s not alone, so I pull out my phone to see if my paycheck has been deposited yet, finding that it has.
I call the airport only to be let down when I find out the ticket costs more than my monthly rent because only private planes leave from the local airstrip. So instead, I do the only thing I can.
I close and lock the connecting door while wishing against everything I truly want, that Tobias doesn’t come back tonight.
I need time to get myself in check.
To remember my role and his.
To cry where no one will see, like the senseless girl I’ve allowed myself to become.
But then the worst thing happens.
Laughter fills the hall outside my room, growing louder and louder until it’s no longer seeping through the crack beneath the front door, but coming from the wall behind my head.
And it’s not a man who’s laughing.
It’s a woman.
