Tonight’s Family Night for the Wildcats, a yearly tradition they have at the last home game of the regular season. Each of the players have special seats in the rows behind the home dugout, reserved for the loved ones who helped teach them about dedication, commitment, hard work, yada yada yada.
Honestly, I think it’s just a bunch of pomp and circumstance, but I have to admit, I love knowing there’s a seat reserved for me with Keene’s mother and sister. Not that I didn’t have one last year. It’s just…this one seems different somehow. Maybe because we’re different now.
We’re not just us, as in Keene and Aspen, best friends.
We’re an us, as in…shit. Well, I don’t know what we are anymore.
Not boyfriends. Not just friends.
Lovers, maybe? As cringey as it sounds, that might be the correct term. We’re certainly not fuck buddies or friends with benefits, because even if neither of us has said much about it, there’s something more here.
More equaling feelings. Emotions, no matter how much I haven’t wanted to admit it. They’re raw and real and scary ones, because they’re true, and they run deep.
Twenty years deep.
The anxiety that causes only gets worse since Keene’s been a little off ever since we came back from the coast. Still is, though I think it might be getting better. I don’t really know how to describe it, I just feel it, even though nothing’s really changed.
We haven’t had sex since that day at the cottage, but that’s mostly on me. I’ve been busy with my studio final, pulling all-nighters most of this week to make sure it’s done in time. And man, do I feel guilty for it. Or maybe I’m just overthinking everything I do or say, now that I’m starting to really sink into the idea of an us. Because the last thing I want is to go on and screw it up.
“This is us,” Loraine—Keene’s mom—says, motioning toward the seats all decked out with maroon t-shirts donning the number twenty-eight on them. “Wow. The school really went all out this year.”
I chuckle and shake my head, knowing damn well that it was all Keene, not the school. He wanted to do something special for tonight, the sap he is when it comes to his loved ones. Though it might be one of my favorite qualities when it comes to him.
Loraine and Lexi, his sister, both settle into their seats, me smack dab between them. My guess is the choice of seats was also Keene’s decision, which are right behind the edge of the dugout closest to home plate. Gives a great view of the game for his mother and sister, and as for me, I can also catch glimpses of my man’s ass as he does his thing behind the plate.
Win-win.
For some reason, my mind snags on the words that just ran through my brain. Two in particular.
My man.
I mean, I’ve called Keene that before plenty of times over the years, just never in the context of…well…mine. My best friend or my number one, sure. But never just mine. I have to admit, the possessive side of me loves the way it feels and sounds, even just in my head.
As if summoned by my thoughts alone, Keene appears in front of me, finger gripping the net that hangs over the dugout as protection from stray bats and balls.
“Hey, guys.” He smiles up at us, and for the first time in a few weeks, it truly meets his eyes.
“Hi, honey!” Loraine says, jumping up at the sound of his voice. She gives him a quick peck on the cheek as best she can through the net, holding up the shirt he’d left on her seat. “Look at what the team did for us! Isn’t that so cool? Did you know?”
Keene shrugs and gives me a look. “No, I had no idea, Mom.”
“Yet it’s funny how no one else had a shirt waiting on their chair,” Lexi mutters under her breath. Not very well, because Keene and I both heard her loud and clear, though Loraine seems to be oblivious to her daughter’s point. Or maybe she’s just gotten really good at ignoring Lexi’s snide comments over the years.
I give Lex a nudge with my foot, a signal to shut up, as Keene glares daggers at her for a moment.
“The team had the option to put them on the reserved seats or have them picked up at will call,” he says through gritted teeth. “I chose to do this.”
Lexi rolls her eyes and lifts her phone in front of her face, texting up a storm. Probably bitching about being at a family event for Keene when she’d much rather be doing…whatever teenagers do these days.
Probably making videos for TikTok.
“Aw, c’mon, Lex,” I say, nudging her again with my foot. “Can’t you just be supportive and act like you love your brother for one day?”
She ignores me entirely, just keeps tapping away at the screen.
“Alexis,” her mother scolds, using her full name before grabbing the phone from her daughter’s grip. “I’ve had enough of your attitude for the day, and we just got here. Now wish your brother good luck before he gets on his way.”
If looks could kill, Keene and Loraine would be six feet under right about now.
“Good luck or whatever,” she mumbles, crossing her arms over her chest. Then, as if realizing I’m the cause of all her problems—or at least her phone being taken away—she glares up at me. “And don’t think I don’t realize you’re just defending him because you’ve been butt buddies since before you could walk.”
I do my best not to wince or give a reaction to her comment; I really fucking do. After all, this is Lexi, and she lives to push both of our buttons. But I feel the way my body tenses at her words, and more importantly, the newly found accuracy to them.
“Alexis Ann!” Loraine exclaims, a frown taking over her face. “That’s enough.”
“It’s fine, Mom,” Keene says, shrugging. His typical move when something’s eating at him. “I’ve gotta run anyway.”
He turns to head toward the stairs that lead down into the dugout when I call out his name, nearly forgetting the surprise I brought for him.
“Kee!” I call just as his head is about to disappear under the roof of the dugout. He pops it up, just enough for me to see his nose and eyes, raising a brow.
“Got you something,” I say, lifting a bottle of lemon-lime Gatorade. His favorite.
“You’re my favorite human ever,” he says, smiling. “I knew I forgot something at the dorm.”
He’d probably forget his damn head on game days, that’s how in the zone he can get. Especially on days that are important to him. Like when his mom and sister are coming to watch, not knowing about the slideshow each member of the team put together for their families.
“I know,” I shrug, playing off the way his words make my pulse thrum.
“Like I said,” Lexi grumbles. “Butt buddies.”
This time, Keene’s the one to roll his eyes. “Come to the other end of the dugout so I can grab it?”
I could just as easily shimmy it under the net where we are right now, but the look in Keene’s eye as he makes his request lets me know he wants a second of my time away from the prying eyes and ears of his family.
Thankfully, we’re here pretty early. Loraine’s doing, of course, being the overly supportive and extremely enthusiastic mother she is. Yet because of this, the stands are still pretty empty and we have a bit more privacy down on the other end of the dugout. Only just a bit, though.
I hand him the drink, letting my fingers brush against his during the hand-off.
“Thanks.” He grins, opening it and taking a few slow pulls of the liquid. My eyes latch on to the way his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. The urge to lick it soars through me, making my dick twitch in my pants.
Not that I wasn’t already admiring how good he looks right now. Eyeblack smear beneath his eyes, his catcher’s helmet sitting backward on his head. And hell if he doesn’t fill out his uniform to damn near perfection.
“Stop looking at me like that,” he snaps softly, capping the bottle and setting it on the roof of the dugout.
I play innocent. “Like what?”
He just arches his brow, his non-answer more than enough to tell me he knows I’m full of shit. No surprise here, because I am.
“Lex is really on one today,” he muses, changing the subject entirely. Not exactly where I thought his mind would go after the very public mental undressing I just gave him, but okay.
“That’s just Lex. She’s fine.”
Alexis and Keene haven’t always had the best relationship, and it became more and more strained as she got older and he took on more of a father-like role for her, rather than just a big brother. Add in that he’s a golden boy—her words, not mine—and I guess there’s a bit of resentment beneath the surface.
He lets out a snort. “Imagine how pissed she’d be if she knew how true her butt buddies comment was. She’s had a damn crush on you since what? When we were eight?”
I smirk, vividly remembering little four-year-old Lexi chasing us around, begging for a kiss because one of her friends was kissed by a boy in their Pre-K class. Being the gentleman I was, even at that age, I refused and told her that her first kiss needs to be with a boy she really liked.
Clearly I was absolutely clueless and didn’t yet know girls only seem to want what they can’t have. That was the day Lexi Waters’ obsession with me was born.
“Sounds about right.”
He licks his lips, glancing down at mine. “Sucks to be her, I guess. Though I can’t say I’m all that mad about it.”
Yeah, me neither.
And I’m more than happy to see that playful, flirty side of him come back out. I’ve been so busy and didn’t realize until now how much I’ve really fucking missed it.
“Now who needs to stop looking at who like that?” I point out, cocking my head before changing the topic to a much safer option. “Kick some ass today, okay? Or there’ll be hell to pay.”
He sees right through my attempt to tame the conversation though, using a hand on the dugout to lean toward me. God, his growing smirk is something straight outta an X-rated movie. Full of heat and desire and capable of melting me from the inside out.
“And do I get a reward if I listen to that request? Or was that a really poor attempt at threatening me?”
Doing my best to keep us from being overheard—because more and more people have started filing down to their seats—I mirror his stance and lean in even more toward him until my mouth is only inches from his ear.
“I’ll fuck you through the weekend starting the second you walk through our door if you do,” I tell him, letting the tips of my fingers brush against his. “And that’s a promise.”
If I thought the look he was giving was filthy before I made that comment, it’s nothing compared to the way lust has completely taken over his face when I pull back. Those brown eyes are dilated, and his tongue swipes over his bottom lip subtly as he stares at my mouth some more.
I wish I could kiss him right now. Lay one on him right here, in front of the world. But it’s not only fear holding me back. It’s timing.
We haven’t so much as had the chance to talk about us or what the future holds once we move back home this weekend, let alone how he wants to handle coming out to people, if at all.
My concerns about how it will impact his career is a huge one, and if I have to give up kissing him in public to make his dreams come true, I will.
“Keep looking at me like that, and I won’t be able to walk back to my seat without giving the entire stadium an eyeful of what I’m working with below the belt,” I warn him, raising a brow.
He blinks a couple times, as if coming out of a trance. “Shit, you’re probably right.”
As if on cue, one of his teammates calls his last name, causing him to peek under his arm into the dugout. His fingers rub against mine while he chats with…I think it’s Reyes? I can’t be sure.
One, because I don’t really pay much attention to the rest of the team. And two, because even if I did, I wouldn’t be able to right now with the way the pads of his fingers trace over my knuckles. It has my entire body lit up like a Christmas tree, and I doubt he even realizes he’s doing it.
Touching each other is just subconscious to us now.
“We’re gonna infield quick,” he tells me when he looks back up. It’s then I notice a bunch of his teammates filing out of the dugout to take the field. “Then we gotta get this show on the road.”
I nod, not really sure what to say at this point. Normally, I’d kiss him and squeeze his ass if we were in our room before he left for the field. I did that before he left today too. Yet my body is craving to do it again. Right now. Where everyone can see.
It’s not the right time.
Keene’s free hand moves up to the maroon helmet sitting backward on his head, fiddling with it the way he does his hats when he’s nervous. My eyes narrow in on the action.
“Why are you fidgeting? You do this all the time.”
He shrugs. “Not with my mom and sister here.”
Of course. I should’ve figured he would be anxious about their presence. He has nothing to prove to them in regards to his ability on the field. Both of them know how hard working and dedicated he is to playing ball. So that only leaves…
“Your family is gonna love what you put together,” I tell him in reassurance, looking down into his eyes.
And as if that’s all he needed to hear, he beams at me. But it’s in the weirdest way. Like he knows something I don’t. “I hope so.”
“They will because they love you. And they’re really proud of you.” I don’t say that I include myself in the they I just spoke of because…shit. Because I need to figure my own crap out before I dare say that to him.
The love part, that is.
You have to be all in.
“Good. I wanna make them proud. Because I love them too.” His eyes soften and he gives me that look again. This time, I really can’t place it, so I just nod.
Two of my fingertips give one of his a subtle squeeze before I pull away, turning to head back to where Lexi and Loraine are sitting, sodas and peanuts in hand. Lex tosses a bag of them at me, and I bat them out of the way, hitting her smack in the face.
She calls me an asshole, but I just smirk. “Karma’s a bitch, Lex.”
And then Loraine scolds me for cursing at Lexi…even though she just called me an asshole. Yeah, tell me how that one makes any sense.
I’m sliding back down into my seat between the two of them when I hear, “Hey, Kohl!” being called in Keene’s deep timber. Glancing up, I find him leaning against the rail of the dugout, still where he and I were just talking.
I raise my brow in response, figuring he’d make some comment to back his sister up. Instead, the fucker opens his damn mouth and shocks the ever-loving hell outta me.
“I dare you to put your money where your mouth is after the game,” he taunts, that cocky smile returning. “Regardless of the outcome.”
Oh, baby, you think I’d have it any other way?
I nod, doing my best to keep my grin from taking over my entire face. “You’re on.”
“What was that about?” Lexi asks a moment later. When I’m able to peel my eyes away from Keene as he saunters out to his position behind the plate for infield practice, I look down at her big, blue eyes.
“Nothing, really,” I say with a shrug. “I just told Keene I’d kick his ass if he didn’t do well today.”
Yeah. Kick his ass.
Right…
