“and I thought I’d be happy, but I’m barely breathing”—Falling Up by Dean Lewis
“This is the final boarding call for flight 375A to New York City. Please proceed to gate six immediately. The final checks are being completed and the captain will order for the doors of the aircraft to close in approximately five to ten minutes. I repeat. This is the final boarding call for flight 375A to New York City.”
I’m starting to regret my decisions to leave for a couple of months. Sure, I’ve always dreamed of studying abroad, but never have I imagined that being my final year of university.
I’m also not quite sure how good of a decision it was to choose St. Trewery University. I had so many options, and yet I chose to go to the one university in the city I ran away from.
I hadn’t really had a choice anyway. My father got a better job offer in Germany when I was seven, of course he took it. My mother figured we shouldn’t have to live four years without seeing our father, so we tagged right along.
And I guess now I’m going back for a little under half a year.
But… all my friends are here. So is my family. Well, part of my family. I’m only really close to two of them, though.
Still, it’s good to finally get far away from my ex-boyfriend for a while.
Exactly, Sofia. Stay positive.
We don’t allow negative thoughts. Especially not when you’re trapped in an airplane for the next twelve hours of your life. That is, if the plane doesn’t crash and you’ll die.
Aaaand there the negativity is again.
Breathe in. Breathe out. Everything will be alright.
Just ten minutes ago I had to say goodbye to everyone I love. And I doubt I’ll get to see them again before Christmas. Maybe not even then.
Flights are expensive. Especially ones that get you across the ocean.
I can literally feel the elderly lady next to me judge me. She probably wonders why Satan decided to punish her by seating her next to a twenty-year-old.
Correction, a bawling-her-eyes-out twenty-year-old.
She might as well have been seated next to a toddler at this point.
It’s not that I’m necessarily afraid of flying. Maybe I am. But the fact that I miss everyone already plays a huge role as for my tears as well.
Alright, and perhaps the fact that my anxiety goes crazy when I’m in the air. Something about flying just doesn’t seem right to me.
↞♡↠
I’m not only a whole day late, but I’m also homeless now.
Things couldn’t get any worse.
Well, at least my classes don’t start before Monday. And as it’s only Saturday, I have about one and a half days left to find a place to stay.
I was supposed to get a room assigned at St. Trewery’s dorms, but as it seems, they’re full. Why would they promise me a room when, clearly, they have no space for me?
Literally. It took them a whole six months and me already being stuck here to find out I cannot stay at the dorms.
And to make matters worse, I started my goddamn period on this damn flight here.
But, hey, I did say I lived here once. I’m just praying my aunt is still around. I haven’t talked to her in what must be decades. Maybe not decades, but at least ten years.
I take out my phone, seeing it only has about five percent battery left, but it’ll have to do. I certainly won’t get to charge it any time soon.
I look up her contact in my phone, praying to every single God out there that she’s still got the same number.
Dialing her number, my blood starts rushing through me at lightning speed, my hands shaking. Why am I so anxious about talking to my own aunt? Perhaps because if she says no or doesn’t live here anymore, I seriously don’t know where else to go.
Luck seems to be on my side for once, seeing as someone actually does pick up the phone.
“Sofia?” the voice of my aunt comes through the phone. She sounds as surprised to hear from me as I was hearing I will be homeless.
“Hey, yeah, it’s me.” Awkward.
My aunt keeps quiet. Like I said, we haven’t talked in at least one decade. I must have been ten by the time living on the other side of the globe just got too much to stay in touch with everyone else. So, I’m not surprised she has no idea what to say.
“Look, I have a problem…” I walk up and down the little pathway in front of a grocery store, not knowing how to ask someone I haven’t talked to in ages for such a huge favor.
“Spit it out, dear.”
“I’m in New City,” I say. “I was supposed to stay at the dorms of St. Trewery, but as it seems, they no longer have a room available for me. So up until I—”
“Oh, dear, I don’t live in New City anymore.” There goes my only hope. “I do live in Wesley Hills, though. You remember your childhood friend… What’s her name again? Liliana?”
“Lily?” Her name sends an instant chill through my body. I haven’t heard her name in so long, it’s strange realizing certain people in my life actually remembering her, talking to me about her.
“Yes, yes. Her mother lives right next to me.”
I’m not sure why she’s telling me this. “That’s cool. So uh, listen, Nicole. I know this is a lot to ask… but could I stay with you for a short while? Only until I found an apartment close to St. Trewery?”
“Sure. I’ll text you my address. Just go and knock at Victoria’s door and ask for the key to let yourself in. She has a spare one. I’m at work, otherwise I’d come pick you up.”
Oh, thank fuck. I already pictured myself spending the night sleeping on a park bench. Though, I might want to take care of my whole getting-my-period problem before I seat myself in an Uber.
