Blood-lust wasn’t what humans imagined it to be. They conflated the term with violence. Not that blood-lust and violence weren’t bedfellows. They usually came hand in hand. But blood-lust always preceded violence. Violence never sparked the frenzy I now felt. That always started with desire–some craving left unfulfilled. I didn’t just crave blood, I craved flesh on my lips, against my skin, under my bare fingertips. And if I didn’t get it–if something or someone got in the way–that’s when the violence occurred.
“Julian,” Bellamy’s deep voice ran like an electric undercurrent in the background. “Get control.”
I snarled, sweeping one arm at him like a hook. Bellamy was not suffering from blood-lust, so he dodged me easily. A younger vampire might have frozen and wound up shorter by a head. A stranger might have attacked. I’d known Bellamy for centuries, and we’d been in enough bar fights and battles to know how to handle each other.
“Why does she smell like you?” I growled, stalking toward him. Thea scrambled to get between us, but instead, Bellamy shielded her.
Anger bellowed out of me, tearing through the air like a crack of thunder.
Thea tried to push Bellamy aside as if she understood she was the key to diffusing my rage.
Bellamy held his ground, looking unimpressed. I might rip him apart just for acting like a total bastard. “She was freezing.”
“And you thought you could claim her?” I lunged toward him, but Bellamy sidestepped me. He twisted and caught me in a choke hold.
“I forgot how stubborn you could be,” he grunted as I fought his hold on me.
“I forgot you wrestle.” Every time I managed to get loose, he caught me again. That was the other thing about blood-lust. It was usually only dangerous when all parties were suffering from it. If a vampire kept a clear head, they could easily handle an opponent being controlled by a raging hard-on.
“She is stoned out of her mind,” he hissed so that Thea couldn’t hear. His arm remained locked around my neck.
“What did you do to her?” I asked in broken gasps.
“I didn’t do a thing. Your scent is all over her. Another vampire wouldn’t have come within ten feet of her. Are you trying to tell me you didn’t feed her your venom?”
That was exactly what I was telling him, except that he made a damn good point. Some of the blind fury I felt seeped away. I’d made a point to mark Thea as mine. Only a suicidal vampire would go near her. Or Bellamy. “She smells like you now. Maybe you fed her venom.”
“Now you’re just being a dick.” He didn’t release me. “Think about it.”
I’d kissed Thea, that was all. I’d thought about doing more to her. I’d even fantasized about someday watching her enjoy the true perk of being a vampire’s lover. I hadn’t intentionally fed her my venom. I wouldn’t.
But I hadn’t been thinking very clearly either.
My fangs had been out since we’d arrived. Venom was a natural byproduct of that, so when I’d kissed her…
“Fuck,” I muttered when I realized what I’d done. “Let me go.”
“You sure?” he asked. “I don’t feel like getting my head ripped off. It’s been a long night.”
“Yeah,” I said grimly.
Bellamy’s hold loosened on me. By the time I was on my feet, dusting myself off, he was on the other side of the roof. So much for trusting my word. Not that I blamed him. Blood-lust was a fickle thing.
He shouted over, “She’s going to need–”
“I know,” I cut him off. This wasn’t how I wanted this to happen. But I’d left myself no choice. I was going to have to revisit the question of whether I could maintain my self-control around her after this.
Bellamy lingered in the background as I made my way to Thea. He wouldn’t get in the way, but he cared enough to make sure I did the right thing. I owed him. Big time.
Thea had curled into a ball, her knees tucked to her chin and her skirt fanned open around her. She looked up at me with round eyes. Her voice was so small that the night nearly carried it away as she asked, “What’s wrong with me?”
I hated myself as I tried to find the easiest answer. I’d left her here to face this alone.
“When I kissed you, you got a taste of my venom,” I explained, taking a seat beside her. I paused for a moment, wondering if I had any right to touch her before I leaned over her body. She could make that decision.
Thea reached up for me, and I didn’t hesitate. Scooping her into my arms, I cradled her shivering body against me. We stayed like that for a moment before she asked, “Did you poison me?”
“No,” I said with a humorless laugh. “Venom doesn’t work like that. I’ll explain it later, but right now I need to help you get this out of your system.”
Holding her close, I stood and moved toward the door. Bellamy raced ahead and opened the door.
“When did you become a gentleman?” I asked as I passed him.
“Time changes people.” It was a lesson we both knew too well.
“I owe you a drink. Thank you,” I said, nodding in acknowledgment.
“It was no–”
“No, really,” I interrupted him. “I better see to her.”
He chuckled softly, shooting me a knowing look. “Enjoy.”
I forced a grim smile.
I made my way to the bedroom my mother insisted on keeping for me and hoped I wouldn’t have to scare off any occupied guests. I carried Thea down the hall, past dozens of framed oil paintings by Picasso and Rembrandt and Vermeer. I took the paintings as a sign of welcome, a gesture meant to make me feel at home. She knew how I loved art. But by the time they’d built this house, I already had residences of my own. I had never lived here. I couldn’t even recall spending a night save for a handful of times I was here for a party and usually then, I was too caught in the haze of whatever recreational substance was on offer to remember much. I’d had my own place in the city since the earthquake.
“Where are we going?” Thea murmured as we stepped into the darkened room. I was relieved to find it empty.
“I’m taking care of you,” I said in a strained voice. I shut the door with my foot behind us. Thinking better of leaving it like that, I turned to lock it.
As the bolt clicked into place, she lifted her head and looked around. Her eyes widened when she realized I’d taken her into a bedroom. “Are we…I mean…?”
“Relax,” I said, shushing her. I needed to explain but I wouldn’t allow her to suffer any longer. Carrying her to one side of the bed, I laid her on it softly.
Thea writhed on the bed, her arms reaching out for me. The venom left unspent in her system had reached fever levels. Curls of hair stuck to her forehead and neck. A slight sheen of sweat glistened on her neck and collarbone.
Every impulse I possessed wanted to hike her skirt to her waist and take her. But that was the blood-lust talking. I should have known in the limo to keep her away from this place. Now I’d put her in a dangerous situation–entirely of my own making. Thea was laid out like dessert on a platter. I looked away, but it did nothing to distract me from my desire. Slipping off my jacket, I tossed it onto a bench at the foot of the bed. My shirt followed, and when I turned to look at her, she watched me with hooded eyes.
“Earlier you wanted me to touch you, pet,” I murmured, lowering my body over hers. Her legs coiled instinctively around my waist as she bucked her hips, seeking satisfaction. Her hands reached for the buckle of my pants. I grabbed her wrists and brought them over her head, but she continued to grind against me. Pressing my hips firmly against her movements, I pinned her body to the mattress. “Not so fast.”
“Julian.” My name was honey on her lips as she breathed an invitation, “I want you.”
Fuck. How was I supposed to resist that? My lips traced along her jawline. “That’s the venom. It makes you want me.”
She needed to know the truth.
“I wanted you before,” she whispered, twisting her face to bring her lips to mine. “Now, I need you.”
Need? That was definitely the venom talking. But it didn’t matter. Neither of us had a choice, and even if we did, it was clear we wouldn’t choose differently. I wished we’d stayed in the limousine long enough for me to deliver her first tastes of pleasure.
“Please?” Her soft petition sealed our fate.
My mouth covered hers, and I let my lips answer her. Thea relaxed into the kiss. Her body ceased to fight as her tongue licked across my teeth, gathering any lingering venom there. That wasn’t going to help my fuck-up. I reared up, breaking the kiss but keeping control of her body.
“I’m going to undress you, pet,” I explained before I released her. “Do you trust me?”
Her lip tugged between her teeth as she stared up at me. Finally, she nodded.
My fingers found her zipper. Her eyes fluttered closed as I unzipped it, revealing inch after inch of perfect skin. Now that the gown was undone, I slid its single strap off her shoulder. I couldn’t resist pressing a kiss to her bare shoulder. Thea moaned. The sound spurred me forward and I drew the dress’s bodice down to expose her breasts. Her nipples pebbled as air brushed over them.
“You are so fucking beautiful,” I growled. Closing my mouth over the furl of one, I plumped the other with my hand. Thea gasped and grabbed hold of my hair as I worshipped her breasts. Her heart began to beat faster, making it easier for me to see a bluish vein pulsing under her pale skin. My fangs tried to protract, but I fought the urge. I wouldn’t feed on Thea. Not in this state. Not ever. But the effort it took to hold back made my mouth ache. I continued past her breast, away from the tempting pulse of her blood and toward the only other way to sate my blood-lust.
I circled her navel with my tongue, earning a whimper that told me she wanted this as much as I did. But before I could progress lower, her fingers circled my wrist.
“Your gloves?” Her eyes questioned me.
That was too complicated to explain at the moment. All I managed was a grunted, “I can’t.”
I kissed her hip, intent on making her forget the leather gloves I wore. It was safer for both of us if they stayed on, given our mutual problem: fraying self-control.
“I want your hands on me,” she pressed, attempting to wiggle her fingers past the cuff of my left glove.
“No!” I thundered, jerking it away. With one swift motion, I pressed my palms to her thighs and spread her open for me. I wouldn’t give her time to process my rejection. Instead, I sank between her legs and offered a distraction instead. But as I pressed a soft kiss to the inside of her thigh, one thought rose above the blood-lust roaring in my veins: Thea Melbourne was going to be the death of me.
