There were core memories that would live with me forever. The first time I played on a football field, the first Christmas with my grandma, and seeing Lorelei touch herself while saying my name.
I shuddered, unable to think about anything else. I was a man obsessed. Yet, every time I let myself finish the sentence of what-if, the memory of Dean almost catching us smacked me in the head. But even as I’d stood there, holding my breath out of fear he’d know I hid behind the door, all I could look at was Lorelei. The flush of her face, the smoothness of her neck, the way the silk robe clung to her curves. The indent of her calf muscles and even the Halloween colors on her toenails. No woman had ever, in my life, had a grip on me like this.
She loved her brother, which in a weird way made me like her even more. She was kind and so damn smart and strong, and this isn’t helping. I adjusted my grip on the wheel and wet my lips. An hour into the trip to visit my grandma, and we’d barely spoken. It wasn’t a painful silence. I’d lived through those. This one was more comfortable. It was clear we avoided chatting since I’d stayed in her room and saw her naked.
I should’ve jacked off before this.
I cleared my throat, my cock swelling as the images of her dark pink nipples and full, heavy breasts plastered across my eyelids. My mouth watered. Needing some air, I asked, “Care if I crack the windows?”
“Not at all. I love the smell of fall in the air.” She smiled but didn’t look at me. I’d watched her out of the side of my eye the entire time, studying her like a playbook. She crossed one leg over the other, the same lush curve of her lips acting like she had an inside joke with herself.
I wanted to know the punchline so badly. What had her so happy?
“Thank you, Luca, for driving and coming with me this afternoon. I know this takes away from our routine. Two weekends in a row too! I really appreciate it.” Her voice grew soft, and it fell over me like my favorite song.
Shit. I hadn’t thought about my routines once since I got back from the game. What did that even mean? My usual films and post-game rituals never happened, and that hadn’t crossed my mind until now. A surge of panic shot through me as loud as a lightning bolt. I’d planned to watch tape, but I heard her say my name, and well, her naked body was why I hadn’t gotten anything done.
I sighed, and she tensed. Oh no. I’d taken too long to answer, and I worried her. “I’m glad I could help.”
“I’ll find another way to get here next time. It doesn’t have to be every weekend, you know? But kicking off the project requires face time.” The frown lines left, and her usual grin replaced them.
It was wild how her smirk calmed me down. The world wasn’t right if Lorelei Romano wasn’t smiling. It was law. “If you know what weekends, give me a week’s heads-up or so, and I’ll see if I can move my routine around.”
“Really?” Her face lit up.
“Yeah.” My neck got hot, and I ran my fingers through my hair. “My grandma always wants me to visit more, and I enjoy spending time with you.”
“Wow, Luca, that was the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.” She laughed. “Well, besides the goddess comment.”
“Today only confirmed that statement,” I said, my voice low.
“Ah.” She faced the window, hiding her reaction from me. She twirled a silver ring around her thumb three times before she eyed me. “I’m surprised I’m not more embarrassed. I’ve never done anything like that before with anyone.”
“Meaning?” My muscles went rigid, ready to pounce. Those words threatened my entire future because it made me want to devour her, to say hell with my plans.
“I’ve never let someone watch me do that. But with you…”
“With me, what?” I barked out, my voice raspy and deep.
“It felt normal. Hot. I really liked it. That’s what makes this zing between us so complicated. We clearly are into each other, but we know nothing will happen. Maybe it’s the forbidden, off-limits thing that makes it so naughty?”
She had to stop talking about this and using words like forbidden and naughty. My cock was so damn hard it could drive the car itself. Yet, it was clear she wanted to talk this out, and I could grant her that. “Maybe it’s that, yeah.”
She chewed her top lip and stared out the window again. “I didn’t ruin our friendship, right? I’ve enjoyed getting to know you, and I respect the hell out of you. Dare I say I even like you? If I broke that in any way—”
“You didn’t.”
“Are you sure?”
“Lorelei, I’m positive.”
“Okay, phew. I feel like we could really be good friends, you know? I mean, I’ve never been this into a friend or let them watch me come, but like, this is a new experience? We should probably veto any of that stuff again. Right?”
No. I’d die to see you like that again.
“Mm.”
“I know I’m talking too much and rambling, but I think I’m nervous about where we stand. Your words are reassuring, but your body language isn’t, which I’m not putting this on you. You react how you need to, but oh my god, stop talking, Lorelei,” she mumbled.
“Tell me about your plan when we get there,” I said softly. I knew her pretty well now, and distraction was key when she went on a tangent. Plus, I loved hearing the enthusiasm in her voice. “What’s on the agenda today, and can I help in any way?”
“Ah! Well, Tim set up fifteen-minute interviews with eight residents, and I’m going to film them for sound bites. Then, I have some photos to take, and I want to get the vibe. Make aesthetics for posts and then I’ll work on the newsletter. I asked him yesterday if he could get a group of residents to do some glamour shots, but it was short notice. I’ll play it by ear there.”
“What are you going to actually do with the footage?”
“Social posts about who represents Heath’s Lodge. There’s a nearby high school to the facility, and I sent them an email to maybe partner up for a senior-to-senior prom. Students always need volunteer hours, so why not have a high school kid repaint the building for free? They’ll save money instead of hiring out. I think the crux of my plan is to facilitate making connections.”
“You seem happy.”
“I am. Oodles so.” She beamed at me. “This came from you too. So, when I kick Eric’s ass and get the internship at the end of this year, I’ll make you the biggest cake as a thank you.”
I thought of a million other things I’d like to have as a thank you but kept those in my head. I’d successfully moved us away from horny topics, and it was safer to maintain distance. Even if my dick and head weren’t on the same page.
She stared at me with an expectant look on her face, like she waited for my response. I smiled. “I’ll never say no to a cake.”
“Noted.”
With the shift away from tension, the rest of the drive consisted of her talking through her ideas. She’d start a sentence one way, and midway through, it shifted another direction. Her contagious energy had me second-guessing leaving school after this year for the NFL. She had a vision for her career, and this project would lead to an internship, then a job.
I played football. Sure, every game was a tryout for the NFL. People always watched, and I knew conversations were already happening. I liked the sport because what it provided for me—a secure future for my family, a stable income, a way to never worry about money again. Yet there wasn’t a chance to decide if I loved it in the same way Lorelei loved marketing.
It made my gut twist in a way it hadn’t in a long time. Without football, I was no one, and I’d made damn sure it was the only path forward.
“I might need you to film some things for me. I want to do the half-heart challenge with residents, where you hold your fingers like this.” She curved her fingers and thumb into half a heart. “And you see what the other person does.”
“Interesting.”
“It’s a thing that happens online. I imagine you are very much not online.”
“Correct.” Guys talked about shit all the time, but I refused to get distracted. My teammates were my closest friends, and I saw them every single day. Why would I need another avenue to talk to them?
“Anyway, can you film for me?”
“Yeah.”
“Great. I have a good feeling about this idea.”
“Viral, you say?”
“We have twenty thousand views within two hours. Those are solid numbers for me.” Lorelei grinned and showed her phone to my grandma. “I put a specific link in the bio that tracks clicks, and we have thousands of them. Even if ten of those people donate to the account I set up—” Lorelei’s eyes widened “—it’ll be amazing.”
“Youths are fascinating. In my day, we wrote notes. Took turns on the phone. Luca, my boy, you need to help set me up with social medias. If it’s this easy to be connected, I can see if my high school crush is single. Maybe he’s widowed.”
“Grandma,” I blurted out, my face reddening. “That’s not polite.”
“Hush. I stopped giving a shit about being polite three decades ago. Now, Lorelei, tell me more about viral.”
“It means the algorithm decided to push certain content. Since we created the video within the app and it’s the first one we did, it’s pushing our video to find our audience.” Lorelei beamed and wore her pride like a badge.
I was impressed. Following her around with her phone, I’d watched as residents of all ages and demeanors reacted to her half-heart. My favorite was a grumpy old man by the name of Colin who pretended to take the beer from her hand, crack it open, and pretend to chug it. He even smiled at the end.
“So, if I were to… do one of your videos, millions of people could see me?”
“Not if you’re uncomfortable,” I said, making sure that was clear. “We agreed you’d do nothing that you don’t want to.”
“Yes, Luca. Thank you for bringing it up again.” Lorelei narrowed her eyes at me, a flash of hurt behind her brown eyes. “Nanette, everything you do is up to you. I have enough content for the next four weeks. If you want your face displayed, great. If not, also great.”
“Oh, I want to show my face.” She spun in a circle, her all-black outfit sparkling in the light. “Do you see me? I look good.”
“That I agree with one hundred percent.” Lorelei laughed. “Okay, with some red lipstick we could do a love-advice gig, where you provide answers to questions. Or you could talk through lessons in love. Or dating. Or, to hell with that, teach life lessons.”
My grandma’s face lit up as her eyes flashed with humor. Seeing her this happy made the difference. Yes, I realized Lorelei was part of the reason. I chose not to analyze it. My grandma had been so quiet about living here, and now her energy was contagious.
“I have an idea.” She spoke to Lorelei, not me. It was like I wasn’t in the room anymore. It was weird to be replaced, but it wasn’t unpleasant. If Lorelei ended up being another person to bring my grandma joy, then I was thrilled.
“I’m here for it.” Lorelei leaned forward.
“Nanette’s News.” She pursed her lips and clapped. “Like how to not get your car stolen or how to attract the right kind of man. Person. Not just men, sorry that was insensitive of me.”
“Nanette’s News, yes. Yes.” Lorelei grinned so wide she showed all her teeth. “I love it. We can do a bit every week. I can’t come down here that often, but you can send me videos any time, and we can make it work.”
“I can have my boy—friend. My friend help me.” My grandma’s gaze flicked to me, her cheeks pink. “Sebastian is great with the camera.”
“Who is Sebastian, and why is the first time I’m hearing this name?”
Was he after her money? She didn’t have much. But she had some jewels that she refused to sell. Unless he wanted more…
“None of your goddamn concern.”
“Grandma!”
“You don’t mention your love life, so I don’t talk about mine.” She arched a brow, challenging me with so much attitude, it amazed me.
The thought of aging always depressed me because football was a young person’s sport. But her attitude and refusal to fall back into the shadows gave me hope. She wasn’t alone here, biding her time until I could visit. She had a life. Things she did that I had no idea about. I might not have football forever… so what would I have then? Friendship with my teammates, sure, but was that it? I used to enjoy collecting baseball cards and going to car shows to dream about owning a fast one. But once I realized the only way out of this life was football, everything else fell to the side.
How fucking sad.
“To his credit, Nanette, he doesn’t have a love life to speak about except his one wild night out a week.”
“Lo,” I said, exasperated. “Why?”
“What?” She winked at me. “Tell me I’m wrong.”
“Luca, you cannot live like a nun!”
“Oh, he’s not,” Lorelei said, smirking. “He just prefers dating football more than anything else.”
I eyed my watch. It was already seven, and the drive would take long. “It’s time to head back.”
“Aw, look what we did, scared him off,” my grandma said, pretending to sulk. “I’m sorry. I’ll behave.”
“No, you won’t.” I stood and pulled her into my arms in a big hug. She wrapped her small arms around me and squeezed me twice. It was her thing. She smelled like the same perfume she’d worn for my entire life. “You’re a pain in the butt.”
“So are you.”
“Please, could you two settle down with the sentiments? I’m getting emotional.”
I met Lorelei’s gaze, and she wore the same, goofy grin she had all day. I glared at her, but she just stuck out her tongue. God. This girl.
“Make sure he has fun, okay, Lorelei? Please? I’ll make you famous with my Life Lessons, but in return, Luca needs fun.”
“I’ll try, ma’am, but he’s as stubborn as they come.”
My grandma eyed me up and down. “Yes, I know. Now, drive home safely. And please, visit me again soon.”
It was the soon that gutted me. She’d never tell me she missed me because she knew I’d feel bad, but seeing her laugh with Lorelei and smile so much…she never laughed with me. She loved seeing me, but Lorelei had something about her. I knew it. Hell, she’d pulled me into her like a damn magnet.
“I’ll be back even if this guy can’t get away from the field.” Lorelei hugged my grandma, and when my grandma met my eyes, she mouthed I like her.
I sighed. I did too, and that was the problem. I couldn’t afford to like her. A brief image of her spread out on her bed returned in my mind, and I shoved it away.
Lorelei and I had to remain friends. Not only for my sake, but for my grandma’s. It would never last, and if I got involved with her… it would hurt my grandma when it ended.
