“Luca,” a soft, sweet voice whispered. “You big lump. Get up.”
“Hm?”
“Your alarm is going off for the third time, and you’re using me like your personal blanket.” Her voice held more rasp, and it warmed me inside out.
Sleep clogged my mind, but the feeling of peace radiated through me. There weren’t a million what-ifs sprinting through my head, causing anxiety to riddle my every move. Instead, I was happy. I blinked, becoming more aware, and my face pressed into Lorelei’s neck. I inhaled, her sweaty and sleepy scent absolutely delicious. She ran her fingers through my hair and down my upper back, and images of the night before came at me hard.
Her face as she moaned. The sound of my name on her lips. Her body. Fuck, her muscles and way she moved. How well we fit together. I groaned and tugged her harder against me. “Shh.”
“Luca.” Lorelei laughed and pushed my chest away.
I did not like that.
I growled against her skin, a startling weight pressing on my heart. I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to break this connection and end the night. She was so warm and perfect and sexy. My entire life was all focus, zero play, and I wanted to hang onto the reprieve so damn badly. Even the usual guilt that came with thinking about Dean dulled when she was in my reach.
She yawned before glancing at her watch. “It’s 6:15. Don’t you have to be at the gym in twenty minutes?”
I did the quickest math since times tables in elementary school. I could remain in this happy bubble for three more minutes and still get there without being late. Three more minutes of perfection before my life went back to my schedule. “I’ll make it,” I said, my lips grazing the spot beneath her ear. “Let me enjoy this until I have to leave.”
She sighed, a happy contented sound. Her sleep voice and intoxicating scent had a hold on me, somehow wiping all the perseverance I had away. One night with her and I wanted to burn my entire rule book and dance around while flames engulfed it.
She wiggled against me and shifted her weight so her face was right in front of mine. She stared at me, her brown eyes filled with sleep and warmth. Would she ever look at me like that again?
When I left her bed… that was it. That was our deal. And no matter the reasons the compromise made sense; it didn’t make it any easier.
“Last night was wild, huh?” she whispered, a hint of vulnerability in her voice.
I nodded.
“Totally worth it though.” She smiled and quickly kissed my mouth. “I’ve never done a one-night-only passion affair before. I’m a fan.”
“Plan on doing this again, Lorelei? With someone else?” I asked, before my brain could tell me to shut the hell up.
Irritation flashed on her face, and the loss of her warmth filled me with dread. A soul crushing, panic-induced dread.
She wet her bottom lip and scooted away from me. She rolled off her bed, her spine and perfect ass on display before she pulled on a purple fuzzy robe from her desk chair. When she faced me, her face was back to normal, but that felt… worse. I wanted her reaction, her fire.
“This was special, Luca.” She hugged herself. “It meant something to me, but I am not trying to break our deal. We both know the stakes, so I’m walking away satisfied, happy, and without a single regret. I’m going to shower, so please, let yourself out when you’re ready.”
She squeezed my calf on her way to the door, leaving me alone in her bed with her perfume lingering on the sheets. She said the right things that I wanted to hear—it was special, she enjoyed it, wasn’t trying to distract me from my goal, but my heart still felt battered, and I had no idea what to do about it. Plus, my dumb ass had made a comment in jealousy before I thought it through. If she wanted to bring a different guy back here every night, she could. She had every right, and I couldn’t do a damn thing about it. I’d have to invest in better headphones to ensure I didn’t hear anything because the thought of listening to her moan out someone else’s name would cause a vessel in my forehead to pop.
Groaning, I pushed out of her bed and quickly put on my pants. This wasn’t even a breakup, yet it felt like one. A huge one, at that. I ran my hand over my face, rubbing my eyes until I saw stars. My stomach sank, and instead of feeling relieved at finally being with her, I felt worse.
God, I needed to knock this shit off. We had a huge game this weekend. We’d be on ESPN when we played Iowa, and this big of a game meant more eyes on our team. More exposure never hurt, and there were a million things I could be doing to get prepared. Instead, I was in my quarterback’s sister’s room, pining for her.
Enough.
I snuck out of her room with the intention of being friendly to her the next time I saw her and that was that. We’d be friends who got it out of our system. We’d laugh and remember the time together. Nothing more.
Nodding to myself, I rushed through my routine to get to the gym on time. The guys I usually did rounds with were already there. Timothy, Shawn, Lawrence, and Preston made up most of the O-line. They were built like houses, and Shawn was having a hell of a year.
“Monroe, you look like you might think about maybe smiling,” Timothy said, hitting me in the shoulder. “Did you break curfew or something?”
Lorelei’s face flashed in my head, her grin and wild hair, and I shoved it away with the mental strength of an ox. “Shut up.”
His smile grew as he moved onto another machine. He was a senior on the team and the backbone of the O-line. Always the life of the party, he never let anything bother him, and most of the time, I found that annoying, but now I wished I had that talent. To not worry.
If I could push the worries away, then maybe I’d find a world in which Lorelei and I could explore this chemistry a little longer. Where I could take care of my grandma, get into the NFL with a fat check, and treat Lorelei with the attention she deserved. Right now? All I could offer was a few hours a week. Two tops. The rest was all taken up by football.
“Dude, what the fuck?” Lawrence snapped, pulling me back from my mind. I’d stopped spotting him, and he struggled with the bar.
“Sorry.” My face heated, my jaw tensing at my mess up. I helped him right the bar after he bench-pressed. He glared at me, annoyance written over his face. “I fucked up, man.”
“Where’s your head at?” He shook his long dreads, concern replacing his brief irritation. “You’re the rock. The consistent one. I can’t have you clowning over something that doesn’t matter.”
I swallowed. “No, you’re right. I was distracted. It won’t happen again.”
“No sweat, just threw me off to see the Luca Monroe not breathing football. I’d prefer if it wasn’t when you were spotting me, but hey, we’re all good.” He hit my chest with his towel. “Breakfast is on you today.”
“Of course.” My eye twitched, the mental math of how much breakfast would cost stressing me out. I’d gotten takeout more than normal since hanging with Lorelei since we drove to my grandma’s place, and I could feel the impact to my savings.
The realization that I could’ve hurt Lawrence because Lorelei was in my head kicked my ass into gear. I felt terrible, justified in my concentration. She had no place dominating my thoughts and focus, and I had to do whatever I could to get her out of there.
My shoulders ached, and I couldn’t stop yawning. My usual seven hours of sleep was stilted last night so I could get my fill of my quarterback’s sister, and the prickles of tiredness crept in as I walked back into our house after eight. I liked Monday nights to prepare for the week, schedule out my time, and watch film before sleeping.
I just wasn’t sure I’d be able to get everything I needed to get done. There was no ounce of regret, but I had to make up for lost time. After brewing a cup of coffee, something I never did this late, I set my stuff out at the secondhand table Callum’s sister gave us. I liked the faded blue.
My laptop sat to the left, my textbooks and planner to the right, and I put on some upbeat music and got to work. First, I set out what was due this week for school. I wasn’t a whiz, but I grades weren’t difficult for me. The problem was my grandma kept going on about me getting a degree—something she never had—but it wasn’t likely to happen if I went to the NFL. I could always go back to school, yet the lingering weight of indecision hung over me like a Midwestern storm cloud. My degree was business administration, but I didn’t have plans to do anything with it. It was a title to put on a degree.
If I had a different life, would I stay here another year?
I never let myself think about it because my choice didn’t matter. After scheduling my assignments, I listed what tests were next and then it was film. My vision clouded, and I rested my forehead on the table, just for a second. It’d be worthless to watch film if I wasn’t focused, and man it felt good to close my eyes.
“Luca?”
A soft hand rubbed my neck, then moved down my back.
“Hey, wake up. This can’t be comfortable.” The same, gentle voice grew closer. Peaches and vanilla filled the air, and my skin tingled. Lorelei.
I bolted up, my pulse racing. Lorelei jumped back, her eyes wide. “What… did I fall asleep?”
She grinned and jutted her chin at my forehead. “Judging by the huge red spot on your forehead, yes.” She reached out and touched it, her face softening. “Aw, how cute. You passed out at your table.”
“I didn’t choose to,” I said, immediately hating myself. Obviously, I hadn’t planned that. I sighed, rubbed my face and stared at her again. The reason I was tired in the first place. She wore her hair in a bun and tight running pants, a shirt that missed the bottom half. Her stomach was on display, and god, my blood heated.
Why did the world’s prettiest, made-for-me woman have to meet me right now? Two years from now? I could do this. But now… it was impossible.
“You seem busy,” she said, her voice small as she glanced at the table. “But I figured I’d wake you. I don’t want your muscles tense for the game Friday.”
“We play Iowa.” I rolled my shoulders, hating that she stood so far away. I liked having her hand on me.
“Dean’s been talking about it all day. If I didn’t have a game on Sunday, I’d try to come watch with my parents, but I’ll have to stream it on TV.”
The thought of her alone, in this house, had me on edge. While we hadn’t had a party yet, some people knew she was here. No one would be an idiot to mess with her, but seeing her fear that one Friday night unleashed a beast inside me. “Mackenzie, your friend. She should come stay over.”
“Ah, and break the no-friend rule?” She arched a brow, crossing her arms and popping one hip out. It was such a sassy stance, and I wanted her to boss me around. She could ask me to get on the ground and be her chair and I would.
“Let that go.” I rolled my eyes, my lips twitching.
She grinned, hard, and made a fist. “Yes. I got a Luca smile. Feels like a touchdown.”
“You’re an idiot,” I said without heat. My lips curved up even more as we stared at each other. Was she too, thinking about last night? I wanted to lick her entire body, tasting every flavor she offered. My cock stirred the more I thought about her naked, and she cleared her throat.
“I’ll see if I can stay at her place. I really didn’t enjoy being here alone last time. Too big of a house, too many sounds.” She stretched her arms over her head, already walking backward. “I’ll let you get back to your thing.”
“Wait,” I said, not knowing what I wanted to say except I wanted more time with her. It was already eleven, and I hadn’t done any of the things I needed to, but Lorelei made my soul feel lighter.
Her fiery attitude and smiles were enticing, and I was addicted.
I pointed to the chair next to me, awkward as fuck. “Study with me.”
She rubbed her lips together before a wrinkle formed between her eyes. “Luca, you should sleep.”
“I didn’t get through everything. I need to watch film and take notes, then review them tomorrow. If I don’t—”
She shut my laptop and held out her hand. She wore a silver ring on her thumb with a tiny green gem. I wanted to know what it meant, who gave it to her? Did she like jewelry? I wasn’t sure, since she rarely wore it.
“Come on. No more tonight.”
“What are you…” I trailed off, my throat tightening. Her fingers were so soft as she tugged me away from the chair. “Are we…?”
“No.” She laughed, staring at my hand for a beat before letting go. “I’m being a good roommate and putting you to bed.” She looked around us and whispered, “Alone.”
She nudged me up the stairs, and we ascended in sync, not saying anything but also not walking far enough away so our arms kept touching. There were so many things I wanted to ask but refrained. She was being a friend.
“Now, I’m going to tuck you in your room and make sure you don’t sneak out. All your shit can wait until morning, understand me?”
I nodded, absolutely entranced with her.
Honestly, I couldn’t recall the last time a girl cared enough about me to make sure I went to bed. They wanted me for my body, for a few orgasms, or a way to say they slept with someone on the football team. They’d tell me how hot I was or how good I was on the field but this? God, it was different.
We arrived to my room, and she gently pushed me inside at the base of my back. She walked backward to her door, her eyes dancing with fire. “I mean it, Monroe. Go to sleep.”
“Can I brush my teeth at least?”
She narrowed her eyes. “Okay, smartass. Yes. Be quick, two minutes is standard so not a second longer.”
“You’re fucking cute.” I smiled, so hard, my cheeks hurt. ”Two minutes is standard?”
“My uncle is a dentist, and I listen. I have great teeth, and don’t think complimenting me will help your case.” She pointed at me.
I held up my hands before running into the bathroom and brushing my teeth as quickly as possible. It might not have been two minutes, but I used the bathroom fast too. When I walked out, she stood there, lips pursed, and I was pretty sure she owned me at that point.
“You had ten seconds before I went in there and kidnapped you. Now, in your bed.”
“Are you tucking me in?” I teased. I tossed my shirt onto my chair and sat on the side of my bed. She remained at the door, her cheeks redder than before as a serious expression crossed her face. It made my muscles rigid. “What is it?”
“You’re always taking care of everyone else, and I want to make sure you take care of you.” She walked in, no, it was more like a glide. She chewed the side of her lip as she pulled up my blanket and covered me.
She legit tucked me into my bed. I was charmed as fuck.
“Friday is important for you, so please, get rest.” She cupped my face, her fingers grazing my jaw, and I sighed.
“Lo—“ I said, my voice lost.
She nodded but didn’t say anything as she retreated from my room. The unsaid words weighed a million pounds. It would just hurt to say empty promises or say things that wouldn’t matter. It was like she read my mind and fled before we did something we’d regret.
She gave me a small, sad smile before shutting my door, leaving me alone with her scent and lingering touch on my skin.
I could lie to myself and pretend I didn’t have feelings for her all I wanted, but that woman was so far under my skin I couldn’t see a way to escape her, and that didn’t terrify me as much as it should’ve.
