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Flawed Heart: Chapter 24

Amelia

The lights fade to dark on the stage, and the crowd goes crazy. They already lost their shit earlier when the guys played covers of two of Ocean Heart’s songs, but this is next level. They want an encore, and I’m sure my guys are willing to please them. The past week has been a steady stream of shows, autographs, and reporters. To say the guys hit it big on the East Coast is an understatement. I thought the love in California and Washington was huge, but between New York, New Jersey and now, Massachusetts, the guys have increased sales, interest, and their fan base, while also trending on Twitter in the number eight spot. I’ve never seen Becks and Spyder so pumped before.

As much as I am trying to enjoy the moment and bask in our achievements, I can’t help but feel torn up inside. If only my personal life wasn’t chaotic. I’m so lost in thought that I jump when my phone vibrates in my hand.

Zander: Sara said the contract is ready to auto-send at 12:17 a.m. Are you ready?

No. Yes. I don’t know. I blow out a breath, my chest squeezing tightly. I’ve had a week to prepare. I called Sara, the attorney that Zander suggested to handle the contracts with Ocean. She and I worked for forty-eight hours straight to identify and answer any possible questions or accusations that will come from the media, BNE and/or Ocean’s uncle. This woman is so organized, we have a plan A down to a plan V. I’m ready, but I’m also nervous. On top of that is the fact that the day after our dinner, Zander had a copy of Ocean’s contract with BNE and BNE policies mailed confidentially to my hotel room. I couldn’t have done this without him. We felt like a team, and the guilt I feel over that is eating me alive because no one knows he helped me.

Not all promises are meant to last. 

Not every smile we shared was meant forever.

But if you look at me now, and I look at you now…

Are we even friends or are you just a part of my past?

Becks’s lyrics reach me in the crowd. I know he didn’t write this song, but it still feels like he’s pouring his heart into it. Which is crazy, right? Ever since we left New Zealand, we’ve been friends. He’s never said anything about being more, and I’ve never pushed. I’ve always been okay with how things were between us. Friendship with sex thrown in every once in a while.

I never told Becks or Spyder about my dinner with Zander. I haven’t confided in them that he wants me to try again. I’m scared they’ll judge me, and I feel terrible thinking that too. I cried to them so many times, and almost destroyed myself because of that stupid contract. But the absolute worst is that I’m keeping this secret now and it makes me feel guilty.

Something changed in me after that dinner with Zander. I no longer wanted to put distance between us. I finally let myself acknowledge that I did want him to chase me. I wanted him to fight to be with me and to prove to me that he was a different person. The way he held me and kissed my face has been on repeat in my dreams all week. On one hand, I’m ready to melt, thinking about him, then the next, I’m reminded of the mess I used to be because of him.

I glance at my phone again. 12:15 a.m.

Two minutes. My eyes close while I concentrate on breathing. A plan’s in place. And, if all of Sara’s plans, A through V, fail, for once I have two other powerful men in my corner. Because yes, York is also in on this. Not to be outdone by his best friend, my brother has also been sending Sara helpful hints and sending me ‘boss babe’ memes all day. I went from no communication with either of them for years, and all of a sudden, they’re both vying for my attention.

My phone pings.

I look down to the email notification. It’s 12:19 a.m. and the contract is already in my inbox, CC’d to Tabbi and Sara. It’s official. Ocean Heart is now part of Rosen Records. I swallow down the anxiety in my chest, right as Rise Above’s encore finishes. The lights go out for good as the guys exit the stage. The hum from the crowd as they leave makes the air feel alive. My heart is pounding in my chest.

Tabbi: Holy Shit! It’s done. You are on top. 

York: I heard it went through. Way to go, Mi!

Sara: Everything looks good and I already sent it to our database. I also included a letter to BNE on Ocean’s behalf, thanking them for their years together. 

Ocean: Thank you. I’ll meet you in Atlanta. 

Zander: I’m proud of you, baby. 

My phone keeps going off, and text after text builds my excitement. I need to get out of here. I look for Spyder, and he spots me too. I flash him a thumb’s up and see his fist pump before he’s grabbing Becks and whispering in his ear. Becks turns and spots me, giving me a blinding smile. I smile and wave, making my way to the backstage area, where we’re meeting up. My heels clack against the floor in my hurry to get there. I don’t even get the door open before Spyder is pulling me into the room and everyone is hugging, spraying champagne and celebrating.

“No way!” Conrad gives me a hug. “This is huge. We have two major artists sharing a label with us!”

I’m passed to Becks, who twirls me around. “I’m so happy for you. I can’t believe this!”

Spyder slips beside us and wraps his arm around my waist. “We’re unstoppable. And now we have the Kid and Ocean in our corner. This is wild.”

“I’m dreaming, I swear,” I tell them, my voice hitching slightly from all the emotion. This has become so much more than just a wild thought. We’re living our dream right now. I’m excited, but I’m also aware that tough situations are coming our way. I won’t be able to hide once this hits the media. Ocean Heart is big news.

“Are we going out tonight?” Becks asks when it’s just the three of us talking in a corner.

“I can’t. Tomorrow is going to be crazy once BNE is fully-aware and the media gets the story. Plus, we head to Pennsylvania for a few days before your final East Coast show, then we hit Atlanta. I’m hoping to bring everyone together in Atlanta before we head home. I need sleep,” I tell them, already feeling the headache starting.

“Yeah, you do.” Spyder gives me a side-hug then Becks kisses the top of my head. “We have to make an appearance at that club. They gave us the exclusive interview, and we said we would try their VIP section for the night in return.”

“You should,” I tell them, “you guys deserve it, plus it’s always good to make those appearances.”

“You’ll be okay on your own, going back?” Becks checks with me, and I nod, giving him a smile.

“I’ll be fine. The bath and bed are calling my name.”

They both laugh, before starting to change into their street clothes. I grab my bags and let security walk me out to my car. After giving instructions back to the hotel, I let my head rest against the seat. The last few days have been truly exhausting. I’m excited, but I know I need rest. I’ll have a world to smile for tomorrow, and I need to be snappy with my answers to the many questions coming my way. I want to shield Ocean from as much of this as I can.

By the time I get to the hotel, I feel calmer. My phone has stopped vibrating for the time being, so I assume Tabbi is all over it. It’s early morning in New Zealand, where the news is probably already airing. I take the back stairs to my room and let myself in. My bag hits the floor, followed by my jacket and shoes. I need a bath. I strip down and fill the tub before getting in. Once the hot water hits my skin, my muscles relax. My eyes close, and I start to drift off when a knock sounds at the door. I practically jump out of the water and grab a towel. The guys said they would be gone for hours.

I reach the door and peer out the peep-hole. Zander. I flip the lock and open the door, needing the confirmation that I’m not hallucinating. “What are you doing here?”

His golden eyes practically glow as they touch my toes and roam up my towel-clad body. I totally forgot to grab the robe. Splotches of pink scatter over my pale chest and rise up my neck. His eyes seem to grow molten, catching on every drop of water sliding over my skin.

“Do you always answer the door like this?”

“Don’t be a dick,” I tell him and step back as he walks in. “You didn’t answer my question, why are you here?”

Zander glances around the room before looking back to me. I feel a fresh wave of heat lapping at my skin from that look. His fingers graze his lip as he prowls closer to me. One of my hands clamps on my towel, the action causing Zander to smirk. “You got the contract signed.”

“And?”

“I told you last time, Amelia, I want to celebrate all your successes with you. I knew you couldn’t get away tonight, so I came here.” He shrugs his shoulders, like flying across the country isn’t a huge deal.

“To Boston,” I say, still not able to wrap my head around this. It’s crazy, right?

He smiles and bites his lip. “Yeah, to Boston.”

My brain short-circuits. I understand what he’s saying. He came for me. To see me. Because what…he likes me? Wants to date me. That’s what he said. So am I letting him catch me now?

 “What are we doing, Zan?”

I use his nickname and his pupils blow. In two strides, he closes the rest of the distance between us. One of his hands fists in my hair and his arm bands around my waist, lifting me against him. With our height differences, I’m practically balancing on my toes. I wrap my arms around his neck, anchoring myself.  “I’m making you feel good, baby. I’ll keep going until you believe I want you.”

His lips meet mine in a kiss so scorching, so filled with the longing and hunger that has been building for years. Kissing Zander is entirely different then I used to think it would be. There is nothing sweet about the way his lips feast on mine, consuming them, marking them with small bites and sucks. I moan and his tongue invades my mouth, stroking and gliding with my own. My hands grab his hair, holding on to him, totally consumed with need. Zander walks us back toward the bed. My knees hit before I fall backward, and his body covers mine. The towel around my body is tugged off from between us. He kisses his way down my neck while one of his hands cups one of my breasts and squeezes, his groan is smothered in the skin of my neck, where his lips and tongue are sucking and pulling, causing shivers across my skin.

 “Fuck me,” he groans, rolling my nipples between his fingertips, “You’re so beautiful Amelia.”

My fingers grab onto his shoulders, yanking and pulling at his shirt, trying to get the material off so we can be skin to skin, and I can feel his heartbeat against mine. I grind against him, and his lips continue their path down my neck and across my collarbones. He leaves a wake of heat and wetness while he licks his way across my chest. I tug on his shirt again and feel his smile against my skin. Eventually, Zander helps me by reaching behind his head to pull his shirt off. My eyes track over the exposed skin, and I’m struck dumb for a minute by the hard muscles of his abdomen. I rub my hands gently over the ridges and feel his sharp intake of breath from my touch on his heated skin. Our eyes meet, and he seems just as affected as me.

Zander’s lips come back to mine, kissing me again, biting at my lips and sucking until I’m completely gone for him. I feel one of his hands trail back down over my stomach and slide between my legs. My heart stutters, but I’m still so desperate for his touch. My mouth opens to his kiss, moaning against his lips, while I lift my hips into his touch, begging for him not to stop. His fingers slide over my slick skin and rub against my clit, rolling the bundle of nerves.

Fuck, I’m going to come so quick. My legs start to tremble on the bed, my head tilting back into the mattress. Zander hums against my skin in approval, my legs spread wide offering him a view all the way down my body. My eyes open, his heated glance on my face. “That’s fucking sexy.”

He moves from my clit to slip a finger inside, curling it to rub against my G-spot. My body jerks, a gasp leaving my throat. Zander grins down at me, pumping his finger into me before adding a second and groaning at the tight fit. My body trembles and my hips buck against his hand, searching for the orgasm that feels just out of reach. He finally grants me release, moving to rub my clit again in tight circles, adding the right amount of pressure until I shatter. I come all over his fingers, dripping down his arm and underneath me onto the bed. His name is ripped from my throat, and he groans in response.

I can’t move. My body has never felt this relaxed from an orgasm. I blink a few times, trying to clear my vision, while my breathing evens out. Zander collapses at my side, breathing just as hard. One look at his waist and I can see his cock straining against his pants. I reach for him, intent on making him feel as good as I do, but Zander’s hand knocks mine away.

“Nah uh, baby.” His voice is gravely. Zander gets up and stands over the bed. My heart sinks, thinking he plans to leave. Instead, his hands grab the backs of my thighs and pull me down the bed, his fingers gentle yet firm on my fleshy skin. “Spread those legs for me, Amelia.” His voice is full of fire and need.

Zander sinks back down, his arms holding my legs, hands gripping my waist. His head lowers, his face grazing against the sensitive skin. The first touch of his tongue on my clit sends my hips thrusting up to his face, my hands tangling in his hair. With his hold on my legs and waist, I’m unable to move, even if I wanted to. Zander is ruthless. He uses his mouth, his tongue, his teeth on my clit and his fingers to bring me over the edge. By the third time, tears are tracking into my hairline and my toes feel numb from curling them into the bed. My hands are sweaty and stick to Zander’s hair when I finally let my arms drop away from his head.

He stands again and drops his pants to the ground, before sliding in bed next to me. Zander’s arm bands around my waist, and he pulls my body into him, moving us away from the wet spot on the sheets. “I can’t move or think,” I tell him, and hear his chuckle against my back.

“Get some sleep, Amelia,” he whispers against my shoulder. I tilt my head back and find his lips with mine. He tastes like me and him, which only makes my body heat all over again.

“What about you?”

Zander’s golden eyes flare when he looks at me. “Later, baby. Tonight was just about you.” He kisses my cheek and the soft spot on my shoulder again. I want to argue, I think I should do something to reciprocate, but thanks to Zander’s magical fingers and tongue, I can’t move. I’m exhausted and his body is warm against mine. I could get used to this. 

“Me too, Amelia. Me too.”


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