My body trembled watching Dr. Kane Cruz walk casually out the door as though he hadn’t almost choked me a second before. My knees were weak, barely holding as I pushed up to stand, swiping my mouth, desperate to rid myself of the taste of him.
As the click of the door sounded, rage exploded inside me.
“You motherfucker.” I stumbled backwards, holding onto that doorway, and sucked in hard breaths. “You goddamn motherfucker.”
The dark edges of the apartment narrowed in. My head spun, deprived of enough oxygen. The deep gulps of air did little to help me. It was that sick, fucking desire that nailed me to the spot. That aching throbbing between my legs that held me prisoner. I couldn’t move, couldn’t risk rubbing myself.
I was wet, soaked. Each shift of my weight only increased the need to finish what his depravity had started.
Tell me, are you in that pit of desperation right now, Helene? I closed my eyes as those words surfaced. Do you feel that blackness, that uncontrollable urge to cut and burn?
Cut and burn? I shook my head, feeling it drop.
No. I didn’t feel the urge to cut and burn. Not anymore.
A new sickness controlled me, making me lower my trembling fingers down until I rubbed between my thighs. Wet. That’s what I was. Revulsion rolled as I rubbed again, digging my fingers in deeper, finding that aching center of me.
How far are you willing to go?
I shook my head as my clit pulsed and quivered as my orgasm drew close. With the taste of his seed in my mouth, I rubbed harder, inching my thighs apart. Until with a moan, I tore at the button and the zipper of my jeans and drove my fingers all the way inside.
How far?
How far are you willing to go?
White sparks detonated behind my eyes as my answer followed. As far as I have to.
My body quivered. I slammed my eyes closed, biting down on my cry of release as that wave of euphoria slammed into me. Oh, God…oh, GOD. Warmth and wetness followed. I opened my eyes, staring through the apartment of my tormentors. I hated them. So. Fucking. Much.
Then why the fuck did you just come harder than you ever have in your entire life?
A moan ripped from my lips. I hung my head in shame. This wasn’t happening. Not now…not to me.
No.
It was happening…but it was for a reason.
It was for those I loved.
I lifted my head, pushed the white hot burn of revulsion aside, and turned around. Purpose moved through me. I needed to get my head together and both of them out of it. A glance toward the door and I forced myself to move. They’d be back any second and right now I was alone.
I scanned the apartment I’d only seen on maps before and took a step forward. It was smaller than I’d expected, and warmer, too. The complete opposite of the penthouse apartment where Riven had held me prisoner. My gaze fixed on the shelf of decanters filled with alcohol and the used glass sitting beside what had to be Scotch.
I grabbed the crystal and poured, splashed just enough in the bottom of the tumbler to rid myself of the taste of him, and drank. The heady burn hit me hard, making me cough and splutter. I wasn’t used to straight alcohol. But right now, I’d take anything.
The masculine scent of them was overwhelming, hitting me hard. I swallowed the rest of the swill and placed the glass back down. The kitchen held no secrets, leaving me to turn to the other two doors. Their bedrooms, had to be.
That same tremble found me as I stepped closer. I had to hurry. I knew that. Still, it was like stepping in front of that car all over again. Only this time I knew what I was in for.
How far are you willing to go?
His voice echoed inside my head, deep and hypnotic, crawling under my skin. I shook my head, desperate to rid myself of his hold, and took a step forward, grasping the handle and opening the door.
Darkness waited for me.
And the seductive, crisp scent Dr. Cruz wore.
Just get it done. I forced myself to step inside and flick on the light. The room was sparse. But it was exactly as I’d expected. Unfeeling. Empty. Not a photo or personal item in place. “You are one cold bastard, aren’t you?”
I moved deeper, rounding the neatly made bed in the middle of the room to stop at the bare nightstand. I yanked the drawer, opening it to find a gun and some papers, nothing that held any interest for me. The black steel glinted, drawing my focus. I could take it, put a bullet in all three of them, and be out of here by morning.
But would that get me closer to Hale?
And who the fuck was taking over The Order?
I needed answers. More than that, I needed time.
Time to get under their skin and turn them against everyone and everything.
You want them.
I stilled as those words took hold. One shake of my head and I knew the movement was a lie. My pulse thundered as my throat still ached from the brutality that had happened only minutes before. Still, they’d never hurt me. Not really. If anything, they’d risked their own lives to save mine.
The only question was…
Why?
I lowered my gaze to that gun as that hunger to understand took hold once more. Without them, I was just as lost as I’d always been. I pushed the drawer closed and took a step backwards. My gaze moved to the bed one last time before I turned toward the door.
I couldn’t make myself enter the second room. I froze with my hand on the handle, fear gripping me tight. Riven’s controlling fist was still wrapped around my throat, his sick need still roaring through my blood. I shouldn’t want him. I shouldn’t crave him.
But I did and I hated myself more now than ever. I clenched my grip around the handle and forced myself to turn it before I stepped inside. The light from outside refused to enter, leaving the murky gloom to control the space.
“Okay, you sonofabitch,” I whispered as I rounded the side of the bed and headed for his nightstand.
Only his gun was on the top, and so was a single photo in a brushed steel frame. I picked it up, staring at two older kids, a boy and a girl who looked like his younger sister. He had his arm around her protectively and those same dark eyes which haunted me looked almost normal.
The room seemed to tremble, or maybe it was just me. This…this was important. In the space of a breath, it felt like I’d stepped outside my body and was now looking in.
His sister.
Somehow, she was involved with all this.
I needed to understand how.
Maybe, just maybe, if she was somehow tied up with Hale, Riven might be willing to work together with me.
Then what?
Are you going to become friends?
Have you forgotten what he did to your sisters?
Have you forgotten what he did to you?
I placed the photo back down on the dresser. No, I hadn’t forgotten at all. I couldn’t forget. Not ever. I’d carry that knowledge like a festering wound for the rest of my life. But pain didn’t give me the answers I needed. Pain only weighed me down, until I was so heavy I couldn’t move.
I needed to move now and turned my attention to the dresser. I yanked open the top drawer to find another gun sitting on a stack of papers. But it was the three burner cells that drew my attention. Now, that was something I could use.
Excitement hummed in my veins as I grabbed one and lifted it out. One press of the button and the screen came alive. It had service…I glanced over my shoulder, then pressed the number I’d memorized, the same one I’d called before.
It was answered on the second ring. The frantic fumbling of sheets sounded in the background as my sister answered. “Yes?”
“It’s me.”
“Helene?”
I smiled. She almost sounded relieved. “Yeah,” I answered, as a thrum of fear worked its way inside. “I don’t have a lot of time. But something is going down. Someone is taking over The Order. Someone called Harmon.”
“What?” she queried, her voice sharp as sleep was forgotten.
“Harmon,” I repeated in a hurry. “The same asshole London took hostage, I think. I need you to tell him that is the man he needs to focus on. I don’t have much time. But his men…his men are—”
“Stop,” she pleaded. “Just stop. I need you to tell me where you are. I need…I need you to tell me you’re safe.”
I swallowed hard and closed my eyes. “I’m safe.”
“You’re lying.” There was pain in her voice. The kind of pain you couldn’t fake. “You’re lying and you’re in trouble.”
I didn’t answer, not because I didn’t want to, but the words just wouldn’t come, trapped behind the lump in my throat. “I don’t want to scare you, but it almost sounds like you care, sister.”
Silence followed, then, “I do care. I care very much and so does Ryth. Come back, Helene. Come back and…”
She stopped, not knowing what would follow. But I did. I saw it all. I felt it all.
There would be more broken women.
More ruined families.
I stared at the image in the photo frame that sat beside Riven’s bed.
More sisters sold to cruel, controlling men.
“I have to go,” I whispered. “I’ll call as soon as I can. Remember what I said, tell London Harmon is now the one in control. He’ll know what to do, and Vivienne…it was really good to hear your voice.”
I didn’t wait for her to respond.
I didn’t think my heart could take it.
My finger stabbed the screen, ending the call. But I didn’t place it back in the dresser, instead, I tucked it away in the clothes, closed the drawer, and quickly backed out of the room. I was playing with fire, not knowing the moment I’d be burned. The empty apartment waited when I closed the door, but there was still one more bedroom I hadn’t searched. One last bedroom I was terrified to see.
Memories of that warehouse came rushing back. The Priest’s screams haunted me as I made my way back through the apartment. Darkness, that’s where I’d stood while I watched London torture him, and that’s what waited for me now.
I stood in the doorway, peering into the gloom.
Steady, harsh breaths filled the space. I knew what he’d looked like then, bloody and broken, as he’d turned his head to search the space where I stood through the slit of one bloody, swollen eye.
I took a step, made my way inside, and waited for my eyes to adjust to the dim light. The shrouded outline on the bed rose and fell with every breath. I suppressed a shiver as I watched him. He was hurt…but how badly hurt? It had to have been…how long now?
I took a step and stood over him. The choked hiss told me he was still healing. Had London broken some ribs? Had he done deeper damage? I wasn’t sure. But I knew one thing…The Priest wouldn’t help me now. I’d turned away and taken a step toward the door when a low murmur cut though the room.
“I know you.”
Cold rushed through me. I tried to keep the tremble from my voice as I turned around. “No, I don’t think so.”
He pushed upwards, sitting up. I couldn’t help but stiffen. Maybe he wasn’t as wounded as I’d thought?
“I do…I do know you.” His dark eyes narrowed in on me. “I just need to remember how.”
