I’d lost my grip on reality.
I lay in the dark corner of the cell and traced colorful flashes of light, giggling at how they danced in front of my eyes. If time passed, I didn’t know it. Every moment felt the same, and I couldn’t find it in myself to care. Sometimes I had flashes of a panicked whisper in the back of my mind that screamed that I needed to care, needed to escape, needed to do something. But the voice faded away as quickly as it came.
My alphas visited in my dreams. They shouted at me, told me what a defective omega I was, and how they never really loved me. I woke with tears in my eyes, but I couldn’t find it in myself to hate those dreams because, for a few moments, I could imagine that my alphas were alive. It didn’t matter if they hated me. I just wanted them back.
Then they started coming to me in my hazy waking hours. Their ghost selves were just as I remembered them. Theo sat beside me and stroked my hair, whispering how sorry he was. Ben made sarcastic comments about my choice of lodging. Cam said nothing. He just held me with solid arms, lending me his heat in the freezing cell. I never knew ghosts could feel this real.
The cell was kept in total darkness except when I finally fell asleep. Then the lights would flash on, waking me in a panic, my heart pounding. My alphas were there, soothing me with quiet words and soft touches.
Genevieve flitted in and out of my cell, dropping off water and food at sporadic intervals so I couldn’t track the days, not that it mattered.
Thirst clawed at my throat. The first few times she brought me water, I chugged it down in seconds. Now I knew to savor it, even though it tasted funny. I never knew when I’d get more.
“It’s probably drugged,” ghost Ben said, sniffing the cup I was holding. It carried a heavy metallic scent that was familiar, but I couldn’t quite place it.
“I don’t care,” I said, resting my head on his shoulder. “It doesn’t matter as long as I get to be with you.”
Minutes, hours, or days later, Genevieve returned. I squinted against the light streaming into the cell, my eyes stinging. I didn’t move from my spot in the corner. Cam’s chest rumbled behind me in a growl and I patted his leg. My alphas didn’t like her because of what she’d done to me.
Genevieve fumbled my water cup and it spilled across the floor.
“Kind of looks like blood,” I mused, watching the spreading pool of water.
“That’s a bit morbid, love,” ghost Theo said.
I shrugged.
I was numb as I watched a guard come in and hit Genevieve hard in the face. Her head snapped to the side, but she didn’t cry out. I wondered if she was actually here or if she was in my imagination.
“Are you real?” I asked her. Maybe she was a ghost, here to haunt me in death, just as she did in life.
She didn’t acknowledge me, just scurried out of the cell, returning moments later with a new glass of water.
I sighed. “I wonder why my brain is hallucinating you instead of someone I like.”
The cell door closed, locking me in darkness again.
“You should eat, precious,” Ben said. Cam stroked my hair.
“Don’t want to,” I pouted.
But eventually, hunger and boredom forced me to crawl across the dirty floor. I felt around in the blinding darkness until my hand bumped against the water glass. I took a sniff, surprised when I couldn’t scent the usual metallic edge. I drank it greedily before dragging my plate back to the corner.
“Your cooking is so much better,” I told Ben, taking a small bite of the bread they’d left me.
“What a compliment,” ghost Ben said dryly.
I laughed and took another bite of food.
