I feel jittery even as I help lift the boxes of tiles into the damaged building that we are working in today.
Gabe and Atlas tried to convince me to stay at home and get some rest, their plan for me to just sleep while my Bonded are away, but there’s no possible way I could sit around right now, let alone sleep.
I needed a major distraction from being away from my Bonded, so I had convinced them both to pull a late night at the houses. Gabe is fine with it, because he’s desperate to get as much done as possible and move people into the buildings. He’s very aware of how much he is capable of helping with this and has taken on the responsibilities of it. I know it’s his way of trying to lighten North’s workload, and also something that will keep him here in the Sanctuary with me.
He’s very concerned about the two of us being split up again, and I don’t blame him for that at all.
Atlas, on the other hand, finds the building work deeply frustrating. While he’s learning quickly and definitely a huge help to Gabe, he’s still inexperienced, and my very alpha male Bonded is struggling with that fact. He would much rather be eating dinner in my giant bed with a movie on right now, and I kind of feel bad for making his long day even longer.
Gabe just gives him shit about it until he huffs and gets back to work.
“You know that they’re going to be fine, right? Sending in one Death Dealer is enough to get the job done, but sending in two of them? Fuck, it’s almost overkill, Bonded,” Gabe says as he takes the boxes from me and stacks them where they need to go.
In the last few days, he’s managed to coordinate huge numbers of volunteers to work on the repairs, so now we’re back on track to getting more housing ready for people to move into. North has shifted the priority from getting families into their own houses to taking in more displaced and targeted Gifted people from around the country.
So far, there’s been two or more families sharing houses so that we can get as many as possible. The few people who’d been vocal about not liking that situation have been thoroughly silenced, thanks to the Sanctuary being breached by the Resistance. Something about finding themselves being rescued and their safety prioritized in a way that they never had been before had shifted their opinions on the matter. Safety, understanding, and their basic needs being met goes a long way to gaining favor with people.
As far as I’m aware, it’s only a handful of Top Tier families that still have complaints, and I’m still more than ready to deal with those people myself.
North is starting to get close to that point as well.
I let out a breath, wiping the sweat from my brow with the back of my hand. “It doesn’t matter who is out there. I’m always going to feel this way about being separated from you guys. Especially with something as dangerous as this, I don’t know how the other TacTeam families cope.”
Gabe shrugs as he directs Atlas where to stack boxes. “A lot of the TacTeam personnel on Gryphon’s team aren’t Bonded yet. Most of them are hoping that Sawyer’s work with the blood bank will figure out why they haven’t been able to find their Central Bonds yet.”
I nod and sigh, it makes sense. My mind is still drifting to all of the terrible things that could be happening to my Bonded right now. It’s irrational because there’s no way that any of them could hide grievous injuries or anything too dramatic from me, but my brain can’t stop going over all of the ‘what ifs’.
North had been so adamant that I stay behind because the Bond was so fresh between his brother and I, but Nox had refused to stay as well. And as often happens, North and Gryphon would both rather give in to his demands than argue with him. I don’t necessarily disagree with them, but it still grates on me that I’ve been left behind.
I can’t stop thinking about if they need me and my power. North had been handling the situation with the Resistance attack really well before Atlas and I had arrived, but there’s no denying that the power boost I gave him meant that he could wipe out much larger numbers at a time. I’d like them to get in and out of that place as quickly as possible. And a power boost would definitely help with that.
If I gave one to Nox as well? Game changer, I’m sure of it.
Gabe nods and sits down on one of the stacks of boxes, unscrewing a bottle of water and offering it to me before draining half of it in one go. “You should know by now that North is all about risks and rewards. Everything that he does is a calculation of what we can afford to risk. It’s one of the biggest things that he does as a councilman. The risks of moving to the Sanctuary too soon were too great; it’s why we stayed at Draven for so long, even after we did have some livable properties here. He had to get Gryphon to screen as much of the population as possible to ensure we weren’t bringing anybody in who was a risk. The same as when it comes to you and Nox.” He glances at Atlas for a second, knowing that this is a sensitive topic to him more than anyone else, but I want to hear what he has to say.
When Atlas doesn’t immediately kick off, he continues, “He’s constantly trying to figure out how to bridge the gap between the two of you, but the risk of setting Nox off again is too great, at the moment.”
Atlas scoffs and kicks his toes against the concrete on the ground, a little plume of dust billowing around his shoe. “So he’s fine to just sacrifice Oli?”
I shrug. “No, he trusts that I am not lying when I say that I’m fine and I can deal with him… which I am, by the way.”
Gabe shrugs. “I think if you were handling Nox differently, North would have stepped in by now. We were all around for the last time that Nox was sent off the deep end and, to be honest, you don’t understand, Atlas. You can’t understand, because you weren’t here and you didn’t see it. I’m not willing to sacrifice Oli, but if she’s fine figuring this stuff out for herself, then I’m happy to leave it up to North. He’s never led us astray before. For someone that everybody insists has to be a monster because of his Gift, he is awfully good at doing everything he can to help his community.”
There’s a warm glow in my chest at hearing one of my Bonded speak so highly of another. Even though I already knew that Gabe had a great relationship with them all, it still brings me comfort to know that they look out for each other in some way.
Knowing that Atlas is also finding his place in the group, even with his incessant questions and picking things apart, is also a huge relief. I know that it’s his own response to his childhood and his parents that has him being a pain in the ass to the rest of them. He has to question everything and get to the root of every issue just to make sure that we’re both safe.
Maybe someday, if I can convince Nox that I’m not an evil, manipulative Bonded who wants to take over his life and control him, I’ll also be able to convince Atlas to give him a break.
Asking for two miracles at once isn’t such a big deal, is it?
After an hour or so, we’ve cracked open all of the boxes that we need to, and Gabe and I have shifted to the tiling work itself. Gabe is good about letting me pull my own weight, and Atlas watches us both for a little while until he is sure that there’s nothing left for him to do in the room before he moves on to put up Sheetrock in another room. He’s much better at that than the fussy work of tiling, and I find myself comforted by the repetitive motion of laying the tiles.
Gabe is happy to work in silence, the two of us getting lost in our own heads and the work as we move together across the room. We’re almost to the door when I feel it, a sharp pain in my shoulder that can only mean one thing.
One of my Bonded has been injured.
“The last time I let you convince me to take you on a little adventure, Fallows, I almost lost my job, all of my friends, and my life, so no, I don’t think I’m going to take you anywhere.”
I have to physically hold my bond inside of my chest with every inch of my willpower as I convince it that I can get this situation sorted out and get us to our Bonded.
Both of my Bonded can feel this war happening internally, and Gabe gives Kieran a look. “You’re about to get your soul sucked out if you don’t do what she asks, because her bond is not happy with you right now.”
Sage glances between them nervously, her brows dropped down low over her eyes, and she glances up at Kieran. “I mean, this time you’re at least taking her to North and Gryphon. They can’t be that mad about it, right?”
He gives her a very insulted, “Really? You’re really going to side with Oli over your Bonded on this?”
She gives him a sheepish grin back. “I kind of have to. It’s part of being besties.”
I scoff at their banter, but it’s hard to concentrate on what’s being said around me when my bond is feeling so vicious. The ache in my shoulder is still there, and it is proof that whoever it is that has been injured has not yet been healed.
My bond is pissed.
“So, what are you going to do? Get there, heal him, then just… come straight home? I need to know what your plan is if I’m going along with it this time, Fallows. I also need to know that you’re going to stick to it and not just disappear on me the first chance you get.”
I take a deep breath, trying to ignore the ghost of my Bonded’s pain in my shoulder, and say as calmly as I can, “I’m going to go and find whichever one of them has been injured and heal them. I am then going to kill every Resistance piece of shit I can find to get the job done. I will then help with whatever recovery is required for Unser, and then we will all be returning back here as a group. I know my bond will not let me leave them there, so this is not going to be an in and out thing. This is me joining the mission… and all of you as well.”
Gabe nods along with me and then gestures at his chest and Atlas’. “And we’ll be going along with her because there is no way in hell that I’m going to be left behind again while my Bonded goes to face the Resistance. Atlas has figured out how to extend his powers onto others in our Bonded Group, and I’ll shift into the biggest thing with teeth I can think of and do my part. We both know that I’ve been on enough of these missions that I will carry my own weight.”
Kieran rolls his eyes. “I’m not worried about that, Gabe. I’m worried about taking Shore and Dravens’ Bonded into the Wastelands against their wishes and the consequences of that, even if things run completely smoothly and follow all of Fallows’ carefully thought-out plans.”
I shrug. “Part of being my friend is knowing that I’m always going to be impulsive and run to wherever the conflict is, especially if it involves my Bonded Group or my friends.”
Sage nods along. “You can’t be mad at her for that, Kieran. She’s always running after me to save me from whatever new crisis I’ve found myself in. Look at how many different shitty situations she’s been in just because my life keeps turning into a clusterfuck.”
Okay, that’s not where I was planning on this conversation going, but it is the first thing that any of us has said that has gotten through to Kieran in any way.
He grits his teeth and lets out the breath he was holding. “Fine. We go there. We stick together. No one is going to act like a cowboy. And until we find Shore, I’m in charge. Look at me, Bassinger. I am in charge.”
Atlas stares at him blankly, and then a slow smirk stretches across his lips. “Sure you are. You’ll be in charge for as long as it takes Oli’s bond to just decide that it wants to come out and play. Then we all know she’s in charge, because if there is anyone that I am going to trust implicitly and follow every order from on a battlefield, it’s going to be my Bonded’s bond.”
Kieran’s eyes flick down to mine, and then he shocks me by saying, “Agreed. Get your Tac gear on.”
It’s a freaking miracle.
We are dressed and ready to go in under ten minutes, everyone moving quickly and efficiently to get us on the road. Sage comes with us all to North’s offices to say goodbye, and Felix arrives just as we’re about to leave.
He looks at Kieran and gives him a nod, the two of them having formed their own friendship since discovering that they’re in the same Bonded Group, and then Felix looks down at me. “If your bond can’t heal their injuries all the way, then you need to get bandages and pressure around whatever the injury is. You need to think about blood loss, first and foremost. We’ll worry about infection and mobility issues after, okay? Whatever you can’t do, I will fix.”
This is why Felix is in my top five favorite non-Bonds.
I look at him with a grateful smile. “I will get them back to you, no matter what. Even if my bond does heal them fully, I will still get them to come in and check in with you, but thank you. It’s good to know for the other members of the TacTeam that I can’t do anything for.”
He grimaces a little, his eyes flicking back to Kieran. “Should you be taking me as well, just in case? If someone in the Resistance has managed to injure someone in the Draven Bond Group, then that doesn’t bode well for everyone else.”
Kieran is shaking his head before Felix even finishes speaking. “You’re staying with Sage and making sure that she’s safe. We need as many of our people here while we’re gone as possible. It’s very likely that Oli’s Bonds have been made target number one for the Resistance or that Nox has thrown himself in front of something recklessly. I’m hoping we’ll get there to find most of our forces unharmed.”
My stomach drops.
That seems like wishful thinking. The throbbing in my shoulder is also still consistent, and I don’t want to think about how the injury occurred, let alone the thought of any of them doing this to themselves on purpose.
Kieran is right though, it would be a typical Nox response to throw himself head first at something. He always has been both very sure in his Gift and just a little bit reckless with his own wellbeing at the best of times.
Then it’s time to leave, everything already either said or hanging in the air between us all, unspoken because it’s too terrifying to speak our worries out loud. I give Sage what I hope is a reassuring smile and then turn back to her Bonded.
“Get ready for hell,” Kieran says, and we all take a steadying breath as we grab his arm, the pop sound of our transporting echoing in my ears as we’re thrown into space towards the Wasteland.
It’s a bloodbath.
My stomach revolts the same way it always does the moment our feet touch the ground again, but the moment I look around us at the field of dead bodies and debris, I lose my dinner.
Thankfully, I avoid our shoes.
“We’re exposed here; we need to move,” Kieran says, completely ignoring me emptying my guts up everywhere, and I’m weirdly grateful about that.
Gabe and Atlas are more restrained in their responses than they usually are, but they both get their hands on me the moment I bend at the waist. Atlas gets an arm around my waist as a support and Gabe tucks an errant lock of hair away from my face.
I swipe the back of my hand across my mouth and mumble, “I’m fine, let’s move.”
I’m not sure where in the country we are at the moment, no one had mentioned where this Wasteland was, but there is a clump of charred oak trees that we move over to for some cover. Kieran looks around as though he’s sure we’re about to be ambushed, and my eyes can’t stop flicking back over to the piles of dead bodies.
There’s a lot of them, some in Tac gear, but, thankfully, most of them seem to be Resistance.
“It’s not supposed to look like this,” Kieran says quietly once he has us tucked away safely behind the trees. “It’s a new Wasteland. It’s not supposed to look like this yet.”
I swallow roughly and nod before giving him a shrug. “Like you said, once North, Nox, and Gryphon arrived, they probably changed their tactics and got more people in. That would be the smart thing to do, if they’re on the offensive.”
His mouth presses into a firm line as he nods, glancing around at the area, and then he curses under his breath. “We’re not going to find them without having to risk ourselves in a big way, and I’m not sure how I feel about that, Fallows. Gabe and I have experience, and Atlas is bulletproof… your bond coming out would be helpful, but it’s a risk all on its own. We might have to consider splitting up.”
Well, fuck.
I think about it for a second, then the answer to that problem huffs a little puff of air behind my ear.
It’s so obvious that I almost feel stupid.
I reach up and grab Brutus, bringing him down to the ground and waiting until he grows to his full size before I give him a quick scratch behind his pointy ear.
“I need you to find Nox for me. North and Gryphon too, but I know that your connection with Nox will get you to him much faster. We need to know who’s injured, and we need to get to them as quickly as possible. Can you do that for me, baby?”
He stares at me with his void eyes for a minute, his head tilting as though he’s thinking about it, and then he’s off, moving faster than my eyes can track.
As he becomes a blur of smoke, I straighten back up. Atlas slips his hand into mine, his eyes glowing with a white ring around them. I’m not used to seeing that on him because his power is usually so intrinsic, but I know that he has been practicing his ability to shift the power on to others, and there’s a pretty good chance that I’m bulletproof right now.
Gabe is more serious and solemn than his usual smiling self, looking out at the damage around us with a very critical eye. He’s been out in the field before, his Gift strong enough and his connections within the Bonded Group getting him an early pass, and I find myself intensely curious about what he’s seeing and assessing out there that I’m not.
“We’re just going to wait until the shadow creature brings them to us? Don’t get me wrong, it’s a better plan than splitting up, but we’re burning valuable time here,” Atlas says, watching Kieran carefully. He hasn’t attempted to question anything about the plan so far, and I hope we’re all about sticking to it.
Gabe shrugs. “It won’t take long. Brutus probably already has them alerted that we’re here and is bringing them back. The shadow creatures are way more useful than you’re giving them credit for.”
I’m desperate to reach out to them all and check in.
I can’t though. I don’t want to distract or startle them by speaking to them with our mind connection just yet. I’m very aware that the slightest distraction could get any of them killed, and it’s just not worth the risk.
My bond starts to warm in my chest, flooding down my limbs and getting ready to take over as it senses danger is near, right as I hear the sound of approaching footsteps.
Kieran signals us all to be quiet and palms a gun, moving around us until he’s got the rest of us pinned between his body and the tree, effectively shielding me from the danger.
A large group of at least thirty Resistance walk through the Shield boundary in front of us, arriving fresh onto the front lines and making it through the same weak point we had.
They spot us straight away.
“Cowering like fucking children, that’s why we’ll win the war against the sheep, boys!” one of them calls out, and my bond hammers at my mind to be let out.
I take a deep breath, what I assume will be my last one while in control for the day, before there’s a snarling sound and then the darkness rolls in. It’s breathtaking.
Literally, I can’t breathe as I watch the group get torn apart.
They all attempt to fight it off, but how exactly does one fight off smoke and the dark itself? Their arms flail about even as the creatures’ sharp teeth shred them to pieces, a gory death that they all surely deserve.
Through the darkness, Nox appears as if out of thin air, Brutus padding along obediently by his side. He looks like death incarnate, blood spattered all over him, but it only takes a quick glance to know that he’s in one piece and the injury I’m feeling isn’t his.
The relief and dread mix like an acid cocktail in my gut.
I chuckle nervously. “Just in time, thanks for that. I thought I was going to have to shove Kieran out of the way to deal with this myself.”
The last man standing there with pure terror on his face snaps, lurching towards us with a knife in his hand, one last desperate act of a man staring down a blood-soaked death. Nox is quick to act, planting himself between us both and using the butt of his gun to knock the guy out without much effort. He was nothing more than a bag of bones anyway, but the shadow creatures don’t seem to mind as they get to work consuming him.
Kieran pulls a face and turns away from the sight of it.
“Are you trying to die here, Poison? Get your bond out and make yourself useful.”
I feel like he’s obsessed with my bond at this point. I snap back, “Just accept the thanks and move on. It’s not that hard.”
“How about you do something useful and stop walking around like this is a field trip for your enjoyment? People are dying here.”
My bond still doesn’t react to his jabs but boy does my temper. When I feel the next group of arriving troops from the Resistance, I let my Gift out to kill them all at once. Fifteen men, gone in the blink of an eye before they even had the chance to spot our little group.
Atlas’ hand tenses in mine, but his shoulders roll back a little as he prepares himself for whatever comes next.
“Like that? Should I kill everyone now, regardless of whether or not they’re actually Resistance? Should I let my bond out again to just wipe the area clean and call it a win?”
He leans forward and his eyes flash black, but it’s his own voice he speaks in. “Yes. There’s no saving them once they’re killing their own anyway. Just take them all out.”
