Zach’s hand holds mine impossibly tight as we walk up toward his parents’ front door the next morning. We did as I suggested last night and fucked on every surface we could in his flat before falling exhausted into his bed sometime in the early hours.
As I walk, my muscles pull and my core aches, but it’s the most delicious feeling, especially with him still standing beside me.
Part of me was worried about what I’d find when I woke this morning, but much to my delight, Zach just pulled me tighter into his body and held me like he never wanted to let go.
“You okay?” I ask as we come to a stop at the door. His hand trembles slightly in mine, and when I glance over at him, his features are pulled tight with tension.
He nods once. I know it’s his way of saying no but not wanting to verbalise it. We might have only really known each other a few weeks, but already I can read him unlike most others.
He lifts his hand to open the door, but at the last minute he hesitates and looks at the doorbell.
“Just do what you normally do. No matter what they’ve got to tell you, they still love you.”
He nods again and goes back to the handle. Behind the door is a home much like my own parents’, but instead of the cold and unhomely space I’m used to this one is filled with family and love. Everywhere I look there are photos that span over thirty years. I can’t help but smile, already feeling at ease, and I’ve only walked through the entrance hall.
“They’ll be in the kitchen.”
“Let’s go then.”
Every head turns toward us as we step into the kitchen.
“Zach,” his mum breathes as she rushes for him. Her arms wrap around his shoulders and she holds him like she’s not seen him in years, not only a week. “I’m so sorry,” she whispers quietly in his ear. “I love you so much, I always have. I need you to know that.”
Zach stands as still as a fucking rock while she falls apart around him.
After a few more seconds she pulls back and wipes at her eyes. “Tabitha, what a nice surprise.”
I smile at her, not really knowing what to say in this situation, before his dad sweeps her into his arms.
When I look up, I find Danni smiling at me from the breakfast bar. I give Zach’s hand a squeeze and take a step over to her, but I’m pulled back into his side. He shakes his head ever so slightly. The look in his eyes pulls at my heart. He’s so close to the edge right now, and the fact that he needs me beside him means more to me than I think he’ll ever believe.
“Would you both like a drink?” Zach’s dad asks us.
When Zach makes no move to say anything, I answer for both of us. “Coffee would be great, thank you.”
With our hands still joined, I lead a silent and tense Zach over to where Danni and Harrison are sitting and pull us out a stool.
“Good night?” Danni asks with a wink.
“Fantastic, thank you. I’m surprised you want details.”
“I don’t, what I’m seeing right now is enough.” She makes a fake gagging gesture as she looks between the two of us, but she can’t help the small smile on her lips at the same time. “Seriously though, if you’re happy and he treats you right,” her eyes drill into Zach’s, “then I’m happy for you. Just… think twice the next time I’m only the other side of the wall, eh?”
Zach’s hand tightens in mine. “Motherfucker,” he grunts. “She was your friend that night?”
“Lucky for you, I was so drunk that I didn’t hear a thing.”
“I’m not sure that makes it any better.” Hearing the lightness in Zach’s tone as he jokes with his sister fills me with hope that he’s also going to be able to walk out of here with a smile on his face once everyone has had their say.
“Here we go.” Two steaming mugs are placed in front of us before Zach’s parents join us all. “Zach, I’m so sorry that you had to find out like you did. It was never our intention to—”
“Before we do that. I’ve got some things I need to say first.”
“Okay,” his parents say in unison, while Harrison also leans forward slightly to hear what his younger brother has to say. Danni just sips on her tea, seeing as I’ve already filled her in on Zach’s mystery life.
“While we’re all being honest, I need you all to know that I’m not the waste-of-space fuck-up you think I am who lives on his trust fund and is doing nothing with his life.”
“Son, that’s not what—”
“Yes it is. I can see it in your eyes, your disappointment that I’ve never made anything of my life like the rest of you. But actually, that’s not true.” Everyone leans in that little bit more as Zach prepares to rock their world slightly. “I own and run a chain of tattoo studios.”
His mother gasps, her hand covering her mouth in shock. His dad’s chin drops, and pride fills Harrison’s eyes.
“He doesn’t just mean a couple here in London either,” I add, needing them to fully understand and to break the silence. “He has studios in the US as well. He’s building an empire.”
My chest swells with pride at the look on their faces.
Silence falls around us as everyone absorbs what he just said.
“That’s awesome, bro. I’m proud of you,” Harrison says, getting up to slap his brother lovingly on the back.
“Thanks, man.”
His mum and dad follow suit before everyone is once again silent as the weight of the impending conversation presses down on everyone.
“Zach,” his dad starts. Zach visibly flinches beside me, his hand tightening in mine as he stares at the counter in front of him instead of his father’s eyes. “What you… what you discovered this week. It’s true. Kassie is your sister—your half-sister. I’m not proud of the mistake I made back then, but equally, I can’t regret it because it gave me you, and that’s not something I’d change for the world. After we had Harrison, your mum was desperate for another, but for whatever reason, it wasn’t happening. Years passed and still nothing. Neither of us were in a good place. Fertility help wasn’t available as easily back then as it is now, and it was taking a toll on our relationship. Watching your mum suffer was the worst thing I’ve ever experienced.” We all watch as he takes his wife’s hand and squeezes gently, as if he’s apologising for taking her back to that time. “She was so desperate to carry another baby. She was—is— an incredible mum, and the fact it wasn’t happening was devastating.
“I went out with some friends one night. I didn’t want to go, but they were adamant that I let my hair down. They could see things weren’t good at home and that I needed a breather. I had more to drink than I usually would, enjoying the freedom I suddenly had, and one thing led to another and—” A collective gasp sounds out around the room.
“You cheated on Mum?” Harrison growls, anger filling his voice as he stares daggers at his father. Zach sits straight, his eyes boring into his dad’s, his fingers clenching in mine with his need to do something.
“I did.” All the air rushes from their dad’s lungs as he admits his mistake. His eyes glisten with emotion and regret, and if it weren’t for the vice-like grip Zach’s holding my hand with, I’d get up and hug him. Just talking about it all these years later is ripping him apart—I can only imagine how bad it must have been at the time.
“She was young, and I was stupid. I can give you all the excuses under the sun, but at the end of the day, I fucked up. I knew the moment I did it that it was the wrong thing to do. I loved your mother with all my heart, but things hadn’t been easy. But I knew then that I’d spend the rest of my life making up for that one mistake. She’s the only one for me.” He wraps his arm around his wife as the tears filling his eyes finally drop.
“I came home, admitted everything, and after a very, very long time in the dog house, she thankfully gave me a second chance.
“I thought no more of it, just grateful not to have lost my family. At no point did I consider that a few months later there would be a knock at my door and a familiar, pregnant woman would be standing on the other side.
“As I said, she was young, she didn’t have a very desirable lifestyle—”
“She was a hooker, wasn’t she?” Zach suddenly asks, his cold voice startling me. I’ve never heard him sound so cut off. It’s like he’s just a shell of the man I know as he listens to this heart-wrenching story that shatters everything he thought he knew about his life.
His dad looks at the table, allowing everyone to assume his answer, although after a few seconds he gives one of his own. “I didn’t pay her, if that’s what you mean.”
“No, you gave her something much more meaningful,” Zach snaps. I squeeze his hand in support when I fear he’s about to let go of the final bit of restraint he’s desperately clutching at right now.
“I did, and I wouldn’t change him for the world. Anyway, like I said, she was young, her life was a mess. When she told me—told us—that she was pregnant and that it was mine, we offered to help her, but she was adamant that she wasn’t capable of bringing up a baby. We tried to support her, we got her into a rehab and organised some counselling. It worked while she was pregnant. She did what she needed to do to ensure you were looked after and brought into the world as you deserved to be. But the day she had you, she told us that she wouldn’t be your mother. That you had a family who could love you in a way she wasn’t able to. It was heartbreaking to watch, but none of us could deny that she was right.
“When you left that hospital, it was in your mother’s arms.” Zach’s mum sobs on her husband’s shoulder as he retells the heart wrenching story. My chest aches for what they all went through, for the woman who was selfless enough to do the right thing for her baby.
I glance from his emotional parents to Zach. His lips are pressed into a thin line and his jaw works as he grinds his teeth. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to hear all this. How you even go about accepting it.
“She was a good person, Zach. She was just in a bad place in her life. Fallen in with the wrong people. She desperately wanted better for you.”
“Wha—” His voice cracks, and it causes my eyes to burn knowing how much this is hurting him to hear right now. “What happened to her.”
“I kept tabs on her for a long time. It’s how we know she went on to have Kassie. She seemed to be in a better place with a stable relationship. Seeing that she’d rebuilt her life, we took a step back. It wasn’t our job to keep an eye on her. She was a fully-grown woman. But it gave us peace of mind that she’d turned things around.”
“She’s dead.” His voice is cold and empty. I desperately want to crawl onto his lap and hold him.
His parents suck in sharp breaths. They had no idea.
“It’s what brought Kas to the studio. She wanted a tattoo to remember her.”
“Fucking hell. I’m so sorry, son.”
Zach drops his eyes from his father’s and to the table, his head shaking back and forth slowly. “Does she have any other family?”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t know.”
“Fuck,” he barks, suddenly pushing the stool out behind him with such force it crashes to the floor.
“Zach?” I ask, my eyes wide with panic. His chest is puffed out like he’s about to fight, and I’m terrified of what might happen next.
He looks at me and everything about his demeanour softens. “It’s okay,” he mouths, and I nod. Our eyes hold for a beat before he turns back to his parents. “Thank you for…” he trails off, lost in thought. “Thank you for everything. I’m sorry it had to come out this way.” He digs his hand into his pocket and pulls his wallet out. “Here. This is where I am. I live in the flat above the studio if you ever want to… err… visit—”
“Or get a tattoo,” Danni throws in from behind me, her attempt to lighten the mood.
His parents smile sadly, standing with him. His mum moves first and rushes around the table to embrace him.
I don’t hear the hushed words she says to him, but the tears that fill his eyes almost break me. Since the moment I first met him as a child, Zach’s always been this larger-than-life character. He’s the one who leaves tears in his wake, he’s never the broken one, barely holding on to his own emotions. His dad steps up and wraps his arms around the two of them.
Unable to look away from the three of them, I jump when Danni steps up behind me and wraps her arm around my shoulders. “I think you might be the best thing that ever happens to him,” she whispers in my ear, and my tears finally drop.
“Oh, I don’t know about that,” I sniffle.
“You know what I do know,” she states with a wicked smile on her tear-stained face. I arch a brow as I wait for what she’s got to say. “Your parents are going to fucking hate him. Please can I be there when you introduce him?”
“Oh god,” I groan, not needing the reminder that we’ve still got another set of parents to deal with at some point.
The trio in front of us breaking apart thankfully pushes thoughts of my family from my mind. One lot of family drama at a time is more than enough.
Zach’s mum kisses him on the cheek before stepping away. He immediately searches me out and lifts his arm towards me. I don’t hesitate in sliding my fingers into his and accepting his embrace when he pulls me into his side.
“I know you already know her, but this is Tabitha, my girlfriend, if she’ll have me.” The lump that climbs up my throat is so huge that there’s no way I can answer him with words. Instead, I look up at him, a huge smile on my face, and nod.
His mum, who’d just about got herself under control, sobs once more.
“I think that might be the most shocking thing about this whole morning. Zach’s found a girl who’ll put up with him,” Harrison goads, earning himself a slug to the shoulder.
After a few minutes, everyone says their emotional goodbyes and Zach leads me back to the front door.
His car, a huge blacked out BMW, sits out the front of his parents’. He opens the door and waits for me to climb in before heading to the driver’s side to join me.
The second he’s in, he rests his head back against the headrest, closes his eyes and blows out the longest breath.
Reaching over, I place my palm on his thigh, just so he knows I’m here while he takes a moment to process his information overload.
“There are two things I really want to do right now,” he admits. I turn toward him, eager to find out what they are. “I need to ink someone, and I need to fuck someone.” His eyes open and find mine immediately. My breath catches, because his eyes are telling me that that someone is me. My skin tingles in anticipation of both. Having his hands on me in any sense is mind blowing. “But there’s something else I need to do first.”
“Oh?” I watch as he pulls his phone from his pocket, taps the screen and places it to his ear.
“It’s me. We need to talk. Where are you?” He’s silent for a few seconds as he listens. “Okay, we’ll be there in ten.”
He drops his phone into the centre console and puts the car into drive.
The question is right on the end of my tongue to ask where we’re going, but the determination on his face stops me. I’m already pretty certain I know anyway. I sit back and allow him the thinking time that he must so desperately need.
Ten minutes later, he pulls into a side road, and I’m not surprised when a feisty little brunette steps out from the shadows. She looks just like she did the first time I saw her. Terrified. Her blue eyes are wide as she takes in the over the top car and walks towards the driver.
“You hungry?”
“Starved.”
“Good. Hop in, we’re going for lunch.” And just like that, a brother-sister bond is formed.
