I wait for days for Steagor’s return. Throwing myself into work, I spend most of my time in my room, sewing orders from the orc clan, then designing my own trousseau in the evenings, until my eyes water and I can no longer see the tiny stitches on my nightgown. But I spend the nights in Steagor’s bed, inhaling his delicious scent that grows fainter with every passing day.
Even though it pains me, I drink the tea Steagor left for me, because I’m not sure what our future will be like and I don’t want a child to force either of our decisions. Selfish as it might be, I want Steagor to pick me for me, not because he feels responsible for the wellbeing of his baby.
My courses come and go, and I discover another peculiarity of the orc society, which is their insistence on showering women with a ridiculous amount of attention, food, and comfort during that time. I ask the herbalist, Taris, for willow bark tea to help with the cramps, and she informs Mara of my predicament. They join forces to bundle me in Steagor’s bed while Neekar drops by, carrying a tray heaped with fruit, cake, and honey. Then they take turns keeping me company, sometimes working quietly alongside me and at other times, swapping stories about our lives.
Then one morning, a rider bursts into the great hall during breakfast and announces that the king and queen will be back soon. The vast space buzzes with conversation, but I remain seated, staring in the direction of the main door to the Hill.
I’ve been waiting for this day, but now that it’s here, my insides are wound up tight, worry worming its way into my thoughts. What if it was all a mistake? What if I misinterpreted everything Steagor ever did, and he’ll still want to get rid of me? I don’t think I could handle another rejection from him. Another attempt from him to marry me off to some unknown human.
I stand on wobbly legs, torn between wanting to stay and intercept Steagor as soon as possible and running somewhere to hide so I don’t have to face a possible rejection in front of the entire clan. If he comes in and ignores me, I won’t be able to hide my emotions.
But before I can muster enough will to escape, there’s a commotion outside the great hall. Rumbling voices, a clatter of armor, and a male voice—Neekar’s?—that says, “Calm yourself. She’s here somewhere. I saw her earlier.”
Moments later, Steagor strides into the room, his expression thunderous. My orc stops at the threshold, whipping his gaze this way and that. I stand frozen, my breathing sawing in and out of me as I clutch the thick slab of the wooden table in front of me for support. Then Steagor’s gaze lands on me, and his whole face transforms, going from scowling to relieved, then hopeful. He pauses for a beat, staring at me, and a hot flush rises in me, rising from my breasts to my neck, and lastly to my cheeks.
He’s so handsome.
I don’t know when I learned to look past that frown and all his scars to the person underneath, but he’s the most attractive male I’ve ever seen. I want him with a visceral, pounding need that has all my instincts screaming to touch, to kiss, to hold on.
Then Steagor is striding across the great hall, right toward me, ignoring everyone else, all the gathered orcs, his friends—even his king, who stands at the entrance with Dawn at his side. Trembling, I wait to see what he’ll do when he reaches me.
Steagor pushes past a group of young orcs chatting with heads stuck close together, and then he’s in front of me, his eyes blazing. Without a word, he sweeps me up in his arms and sweeps me off my feet, clutching me close to his chest. I wrap my arms around his neck and hold on, face pressed into his chest. His heart thunders, fast and powerful, the rhythm slowing ever so slightly now that we’re tangled together.
“Poppy,” he mutters into my hair.
Not caring what everyone else is thinking, I wrap my legs around Steagor’s waist. “Hi.”
He chuckles softly, his hands going to my ass, easily supporting my weight. “I missed you.”
My insides turn to mush. “I missed you, too.”
Steagor lets out a satisfied hum, then strides out of the great hall, ignoring the sniggers and whoops from the crowd. I’d feel bad about this public display if I hadn’t witnessed other couples embracing and kissing, too. This orc clan seems to cherish affection. But most of all, my poor, love-starved heart basks in the glow of Steagor’s attention.
“I’m sorry I was gone so long,” he says as we stride along the corridors. “We had to visit some of the border villages to make sure everyone is prepared for the winter.”
I take a deep whiff of Steagor’s intoxicating scent. “I won’t say I liked it, but I understand. It’s your job.”
He tucks me closer to his chest, his steps slowing. “Did you get my gifts?”
I lean back in his arms to look at his face. “You mean the tea and the salve or all the amazing things you left in the parcels by my door?”
A smile lightens his face. “Both.”
I return his grin. “Then yes, I got everything. Thank you.”
He slows even more, glancing up and down the corridor. Then he stops in a shadowed alcove, gazing down into my eyes. “Did you drink the tea?”
I press my lips together and nod. His expression falls, and he averts his gaze, the corners of his mouth tugging down. But I palm his cheek and turn his face back to me.
“I drank it because we never talked about children, Steagor,” I say quietly. “Not because I don’t want any.”
His chest swells, and he opens his mouth to speak, but I need to say some things before he distracts me. So I move my hand from his cheek to his mouth, imploring him with my gaze to let me speak. He kisses the inside of my palm and jerks his chin, indicating for me to continue.
“We haven’t talked about the fact that I’m your mate either,” I say quietly. “Why would you keep that from me?”
His gaze fills with shame, a change so marked, it has my heart squeezing painfully. I remove my hand from his mouth, waiting for his answer.
“You’re so young,” he rumbles. “Young and innocent. You deserve more than an old male like me. So I thought that if I let you go, you’d be happier.”
My throat tight, I manage to force out, “And you’d deprive yourself of a mate, your only chance of having a family, to set me free?”
He dips his chin in acknowledgment, his eyes grave.
“Oh, Steagor.” I burrow my face in his neck. “You foolish, selfless orc. I don’t want anyone else. Only you.”
His grip on me strengthens, his thick arms closing around me like steel bands. “You don’t want someone like Neekar, with a big family?”
“We can make a family of our own,” I say, leaning back again to scowl at him. “When we decide together that we want babies, we can have a whole bunch.”
Steagor’s chest shakes with a laugh. “That sounds like a good plan.”
He hikes me up higher against his chest and strides down the corridor again. I’m too busy kissing his neck to notice where we’re going, but when we pass the branch of the hallway that leads to his room, and he doesn’t turn that way, I lift my head again.
“Where are you taking me?” I ask.
Steagor squeezes my ass, the warmth of his palm seeping through my gown. “I’m filthy from the road.”
“How does that—oh!”
I realize where he’s headed at the same moment as I discern the distinctive scent of the public baths, the humid, steamy warmth wafting down the corridor.
“But I wanted to…you know,” I complain in a whisper.
Steagor just grins. “Don’t worry, little mate. There’s a lot you don’t know yet.”
