After Noah leaves to help Mallory and Serena with Miss Swift, I finish Shelby’s hooves and continue working the rest of the day. Rudy and Trey, another ranch hand, walk the horses for me between switching them out. I don’t get as many done as I’d hoped with how much extra time it takes to get into a routine. Between the Hollises and my other clients from Mr. Ryan, I’ll be plenty busy this summer playing catch-up.
I only see Noah a few more times between her coming and going from the training center and corral. It’s better for the sake of the rules and the history between her and my son that we don’t see each other, but she consumes my mind either way.
Just as I’m cleaning up my rig and putting my supplies away, Mr. and Mrs. Hollis appear in their truck and walk toward me with bowls of Tupperware in their hands.
“How was your first day?” Garrett asks.
“Great. Everyone was very nice and welcomin’.” I smile as Dena sets down one of her dishes.
“Noah told me you haven’t stopped to eat, so I brought leftovers from supper. You can help yourself anytime to the house for food or eat at The Lodge.”
“Oh, that’s not necessary.”
“I insist,” she says.
“Either you do as she says or she’ll just bring ya leftovers each night and spoon-feed you against your own free will,” Garrett says, chuckling.
“There’s chicken and sausage gumbo, rice, and peach cobbler for dessert.”
“Mrs. Hollis, this is too much. Are ya sure?”
She pats my arm with a genuine smile. “Cookin’ for my family and friends is my love language.”
Grinning, I nod. “Thank you. I appreciate it.”
We chat for a few more minutes, then Dena invites me to Sunday night supper. I try to get out of it, knowing it’ll make things awkward with Noah, but that woman doesn’t take no for an answer. She’s headstrong, just like her daughter. They excuse themselves and go inside the barn. Moments later, I hear them chatting with Ayden and Trey.
Once I lock up the rig and place the leftovers in my truck, I pull out my phone.
FISHER
Thanks for sending your mom with food. It smells delicious.
I look over at the containers and smile at the first home-cooked meal I’ve had in years.
NOAH
Sorry for not warning you. As soon as I mentioned you didn’t take a break all day, she was already putting the food in containers for you.
FISHER
So you were keeping an eye on me, huh?
NOAH
No. I just happened to notice your truck didn’t leave.
I smirk because she’s lying. My truck isn’t in view from the training center where she spent most of her day.
FISHER
I could’ve packed a lunch.
NOAH
Did you?
I hop in my truck and start it, but don’t pull away.
FISHER
No, I had a big breakfast.
NOAH
Just know she’ll continue to bring you food now.
FISHER
She invited me to come for dinner on Sunday. Is that gonna be a problem?
NOAH
Of course she did…
I anticipate her asking me to somehow get out of it or telling me I can’t go.
NOAH
It’s fine with me if you think you can keep your eyes off me that long.
I chuckle, shaking my head. She’s not wrong, though. I can’t even deny it. Noah’s breathtakingly beautiful, but it’s her smart mouth and confidence that attract me to her the most.
FISHER
Says the woman who watched me all day enough to know I didn’t eat.
NOAH
You’re making me sound like a stalker.
FISHER
Are you?
NOAH
You wish. Here I thought you were when you showed up this morning.
FISHER
If you’d returned a text like I see you know how to do after all, you would’ve been prepared.
NOAH
Okay, smart-ass. Don’t push your luck now that I am.
I chuckle, hearing her playful tone in my head, and all I want now is to keep her responding.
FISHER
When can I see you outside of work?
I type out the question without thinking. Hurting Jase is the last thing I want to do. Still, I can’t stop myself from wanting to know more about her. Even if all we can be is friends.
NOAH
I thought we already determined that was a bad idea.
FISHER
No one said we can’t hang out as friends.
Even I’m not buying my bullshit excuse, but I can’t help it. Noah drives me insane. It’s why I couldn’t keep my eyes off her at the rodeo.
NOAH
Friends, huh?
FISHER
What’s wrong with being friends?
NOAH
I dunno. Jase asked to see me Friday evening.
My stomach turns like a knife just stabbed through me, but I can’t tell her that. When I asked him to hang out with me tonight, he blew me off and said maybe in a few days. Guess that won’t be happening either.
FISHER
Yeah?
NOAH
After I mentioned you being the new farrier, he said he had no idea. Then he suggested we all meet for dinner. I told him I’d have to get back to him, but I’m thinking it’d be a really bad idea…
FISHER
The three of us? Shit.
Just then, my phone vibrates with a message from Jase.
JASE
I had no idea the Hollises were one of the clients you took on. My girlfriend lives there. Can you meet us for dinner Friday at six?
What the fuck? He calls her his girlfriend?
Before I respond, I send Noah another message.
FISHER
Are you sure you two aren’t dating?
NOAH
Of course I’m sure. Why?
FISHER
He just texted and called you his girlfriend.
NOAH
Ugh. Probably out of habit.
Or is she clueless about my son still having feelings for her?
FISHER
I thought you said you two broke up a couple years ago?
NOAH
We did. But neither of us has dated since then, so I think he does it without realizing it.
I pinch the bridge of my nose and wonder what in the Jerry Springer have I gotten myself into.
FISHER
Should I just tell him? Get all the awkwardness out now.
NOAH
No! It was one time. No point in ruining your relationship over a one-night stand. Just act normal. He knows we’ve been introduced at the ranch, so we’ll just talk about work and normal stuff.
I scoff at “normal stuff.” Nothing about this is normal.
FISHER
If you say so.
I go back to Jase’s message and type out my response.
FISHER
Sure. Where?
JASE
Lilian’s Steakhouse, it’s new.
FISHER
That works. The Hollis twins also invited me to the Twisted Bull that night. Wanna join us?
JASE
Wait. You’re going to the Twisted Bull?
FISHER
Yeah. Think I can’t keep up or what?
JASE
We’ll see, old man. I have an early meeting Saturday.
Even though he’s making fun of me and calling me old, I smile. This is the most we’ve ever texted.
Then I return to Noah’s message.
FISHER
I invited him to go to the bar on Friday, but he says he has to get up early the next day. Are you coming?
NOAH
To watch my dumbass brothers get wasted and try to ride a mechanical bull for eight seconds? Oh, I plan to film it.
I chuckle.
FISHER
You gonna try it?
NOAH
I’ve done it a few times already.
My curiosity piques.
FISHER
I shouldn’t even be surprised, you little AJ. You probably put your brothers to shame.
NOAH
Pretend you never saw this…
After her message comes a video.
It’s a video of Noah in a pink cowboy hat, sparkly boots, and a pink skirt and tube top. She’s wearing a “Birthday Girl” sash over her shoulder and riding the mechanical bull.
You can hear her brothers hooting and hollering as she clings to the horn for dear life. Whoever’s recording is losing their damn mind laughing and shouting. I suspect Magnolia, but nonetheless, I can’t stop smiling at how carefree and happy she looks.
She hangs on until the timer goes off, and the crowd erupts in cheers.
Then when she goes to slide off, she slips and face-plants the mat.
The videographer shuffles over to Noah, and she’s laughing so hard she can hardly breathe. Her entire face is red as she struggles to get to her feet, and just when she does, Wilder storms over and knocks her over again.
That’s when the clip ends, but I’m nearly pissing my pants at how funny it was.
FISHER
That was the best thing I’ve ever seen.
NOAH
Now you know why I don’t go out with my brothers. They’re ruthless and dared me to do it on my 21st birthday.
FISHER
I thought it was hilarious. Now I have to see it in person.
NOAH
Don’t think so, cowboy. I was drunk off my ass, and by the sounds of it, I’m gonna have to drive my brothers home this time.
FISHER
I’ll stay sober so y’all can have fun. I’ll bring my other truck so everyone can fit.
NOAH
Magnolia’s already on board and has a major crush on Tripp, so prepare for complete madness.
FISHER
She does? Is that weird for you?
NOAH
Nah, she’s liked him forever. So now you know a secret of hers since she knows ours.
I laugh.
FISHER
Thanks.
FISHER
I better go. I’m still parked behind the barn.
NOAH
See ya tomorrow, Mr. Underwood.
FISHER
Sweet dreams, Noah.
After I get home, I shower, then grab a beer. As I sit on the couch, I look around and see the pile of boxes that still needs to be unpacked and the dishes I haven’t washed. The overwhelming dread of having so much to do and no energy to do it hits me in full force. Insecurity consumes my thoughts when I think about how much I don’t deserve any of this. A second chance with my son, a new life, and stability. I most definitely don’t deserve a woman like Noah. I stole those moments with her, and now look where we ended up.
I can’t have her.
She’s not mine.
She’s everything I can’t have. After the life I gave up, one of loneliness and solitude is all I should get.
Still, I want to wrap my arms around Noah and keep her for myself.
